


This Love is Criminal

by southernmiss



Category: The 100 (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Criminals, Angst, Christmas Fluff, Crimes & Criminals, Determined Lexa, Domestic Fluff, Eventual Smut, F/F, F/M, Little Finn tries to play matchmaker, Lots of it, Not lying to you, Raven is a smart ass, Romantic Fluff, Sad Clarke, Slow Burn, With Raven's Help, Wrongful Imprisonment, clexa is adorable, like really slow burn, little finn, lots of fluff
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-11-21
Updated: 2017-11-09
Packaged: 2018-09-01 06:29:03
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 15
Words: 141,202
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8612860
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/southernmiss/pseuds/southernmiss
Summary: Ten years ago, Alexei and Anya Woods were murdered in cold blood.  Their daughter, Alexandria, was framed for their gruesome murder.  After all of these years, with the help of a genius friend, Lexa escapes from prison so that she can finally prove her innocence and bring justice to the person that killed her parents.  During her escape, however, a wrench is thrown into her plans.  This wrench is also known as Clarke Griffin. Lexa breaks into her house only looking for help and what she finds is so much more than that.  Will Clarke believe that what Lexa says is true?  Will Lexa ever be able to gain Clarke's trust?  Only time will tell.





	1. Breaking Free

**Author's Note:**

> Hey guys! I hope that you guys enjoy this new fic. Please let me know what you think in the comments and don't forget about the kudos. ;)

It’s early. Too early. Clarke Griffin always manages to get up way too early. She struggles with sleep. It’s not a very familiar concept with her. Never has been, but she still fares. She takes it one day at a time, and she’s damn good at achieving an ungodly amount of things on less than three hours of sleep each night. Some might just call her ‘Superwoman’.

It’s late November in Colorado, which means that the weather is only going to get colder as the weeks advance further into the year. Clarke hasn’t always lived here in Silverton, but she really doesn’t see herself living anywhere else now.

Clarke grew up around the Los Angeles area. She went to high school there and even started on a medical degree at a college in the area. She had always been rather smart for her age. She was what some would call an ‘old soul’; always thinking and always cautious of the surroundings that she put herself in. Her mother, Abby, was one of the best doctors in the state of California; a neurosurgeon to be exact. People from all over the country, and sometimes even the world, would come to have a sit down with Dr. Abigal Griffin. Even though that’s what Clarke had attended school for in her earlier years as a college student, she didn’t finish her degree. Her heart was never in it. That was always her mother’s plan for her. Graduate college at the top of her class, get into the best internship that money and power could buy, and make a life out of doing something good for the people.

Oh. And let’s not forget marry a handsome, young man from a wealthy family with power behind their own name. That was always a plus. At least, that was how Abby saw it. Even though Clarke grew up much more privileged than most, she couldn’t have cared less about the money; however, she did meet a boy that even her mother approved of. Finn Collins. He was perfect for Clarke. Sweet, loyal, honest, hard-working. He was the total package.

Clarke and Finn dated after she dropped out of college to pursue her real dream of becoming an artist. They dated for almost three years before Finn got offered a great agricultural job in Colorado. Just outside of Silverton to be exact. He asked Clarke to move with him, and she did.

After about three months of living in their new home in Silverton, Clarke found out that she was pregnant. Finn couldn’t have been happier. He loved Clarke and she loved him. They wanted to start their life together and begin it with this new chapter. Another month or so passed by before Jake, Clarke’s father, came to visit. He and Abby had been separated for years, but in all honesty, Clarke preferred her father over her mother. He was so patient and understanding with Clarke and her dreams of becoming an   
artist and now a mother.

Unfortunately, for Clarke… she never got to see her father that day when he flew in to Colorado. Finn had left work early so that he could pick up Jake at the airport and drive him to their home in Silverton. Their car never made it home… and neither did they.

Clarke Griffin not only lost her father that day, but she lost her boyfriend as well. The father of her unborn baby.

Never in a million years would she had ever thought that something like that would have been possible. She never expected something like that to happen. The weight of the world back then began to crush her. It crushed her mind, body and soul. The stress of the whole situation was almost the cause of a miscarriage. She doesn’t know what she would have done if something were to have happened to her baby.

Luckily, she didn’t have to find out. About six months later, a son was born to her. She named him Finn. She lay there in that cold hospital room in the tiny town of Silverton, Colorado with her brand new baby boy and her best friend Octavia. 

Thank God for Octavia Blake. Clarke’s long-time friend from L.A. had flown out to be with Clarke after Finn and Jake’s passing. Octavia knew too much about loss too. She was going to stay there with her blonde friend until she was recovered from her pregnancy and found herself a good babysitter and a decent paying job.

Clarke’s neighbor, if you can count the nearest neighbor being two miles away, was an older woman who had lost her husband some years ago. This woman was a godsend. She actually wanted to babysit Finn and she wouldn’t accept any payment.

That was a miracle all in itself.

She then found a job at the local hospital as a receptionist. It wasn’t much, but it was good enough. Good enough for someone without a college degree and not much experience with any form of work. All that she cared about, was taking care of Finn and making sure that he had everything that he needed.

It’s now five years later, as she sits on her sofa, in the dark of the early morning, holding a warm mug up to her mouth. It seems like only yesterday that she was laughing with little Finn’s dad about some oxymoron that he always seemed to come up with, or talking to her father on the phone about trying out new painting techniques with different paints. But in other ways, it feels like a lifetime ago.

It’s just her now. Just she and Finn.

They live alone in a small house on the outskirts of town, where their nearest neighbor, Mrs. Caldwell, is almost two miles from them.

As Clarke sits on her lounge, looking out through the fogged over window, she can’t help but think that there’s something missing from her life. Something that needs to fill in the hole in her chest where her heart and soul used to be. Yes. Finn does fill a big part of that, but she still feels empty. Still feels desolate.

 

//

 

She had always thought herself to be in rather good, physical shape, especially after the past few years, but… damn. Her long, slender legs seemed to make massive strides forward, but she never seemed to get anywhere. At least not as quickly as she would have liked. 

She could feel them. Feel them right on her heels.

It was dark, and she swore that if she ran into one more fucking tree limb that she was just going to drop and give up right there. She was sure that her face and bare arms were deeply scratched and mauled all to hell from the sharp, jagged branches that she couldn’t help but run into. The forest was thick, and the snow that covered the ground beneath her seemed to be even thicker. She could feel it. She could feel herself slowing down.

But she didn’t care. All that she could bring herself to care about was getting away. Getting away from them and never going back there.

That and the agonizing pain that was piercing her through her abdomen. She doesn’t know how much blood she’s lost, but she does know that if she doesn’t get somewhere safe soon, she won’t make it to see the sunrise.

She’s not familiar with this land. Not at all. She was raised in cities. Cities all over the world. That’s what having rich and powerful parents like hers got her. That was until she found herself locked up in this hell hole that some people around here call ‘God’s country’. 

That’s bullshit.

It’s too damn cold. God’s country would probably be on a warm beach somewhere with a cold beer in hand.

She knows that she’s been running for almost three hours. She also knows that she got a decent head start on them with a little help from an old friend. If she could just find somewhere. Somewhere to hunker down for the next few hours to get her wounds seen about and rest her legs… she would be fine.

After what feels like an eternity later, she sees something. She almost thinks that it’s some sort of mirage. A mirage thrown on her by the frozen state of her mind. She can feel something like hypothermia setting in. She tries not to think about it though… because what she sees is a light. And as she gets closer, she sees…

It’s a house.

The house is small and surrounded by the vast forest that seems to swallow up this whole state. The only light that she sees is the one that’s hanging outside by the front door. She sees only one car. A small pickup truck. 

That’s good. That means that more than likely, there’s only one person living here.

Contrary to most people’s beliefs, she is most certainly not a criminal. She doesn’t even know where to start breaking into someone’s house, but right now… right now is actually life or death. She needs help to say the least. Slowly, she walks up through what seems to be the backyard of the tiny home. Her long legs allow her to peek over into a window that looks over what appears to be the kitchen. Everything is dark.

Maybe she can get in, grab a few key items that she needs, and then get the hell out of there without anyone ever knowing that she was there. Quickly, but quietly, she moves to turn the doorknob of the back door. It’s locked of course. Even the residents out here in Podunk, Colorado know to lock their door.

But of course, that’s probably a regular occurrence seeing as there’s a pretty serious prison place not too far from here. Not where you’re driving anyways. 

Running… running is different story.

She quickly starts to look under everything in the vicinity for a spare key. Everyone has spare keys lying around outside, right? She checks under the frozen flower pot, the old dirt mat, and she even checks under the cook top of the grill that sits outside. Nothing. She decides to check one last place, because in all honesty, she doesn’t want to bust out a window. Not a criminal, remember? Her long arms allow her to scrape her hand across the top of the facing that molds the door. Bingo. She knocks something down and it makes a clinging noise when it hits the concrete beneath her feet. A key. If she weren’t so worn out, and on the verge of death, she might enjoy herself a little happy dance. That’s not the case though.

Hastily, she picks up the small key and inserts it into the keyhole of the doorknob. She turns her wrist slowly, until she hears a faint click. She pulls the key out of the knob and replaces it over the door once again. Turning her attention back to the door, that she still hasn’t brought herself to open, she takes a deep breath.

‘You got this.’ She thinks to herself. ‘It’s show time.’

 

//

 

After drinking her coffee in silence, just enjoying the peacefulness of the early morning, Clarke decides to turn on the television. It’s loud at first. Probably from whatever Finn was watching the previous night. She’s quick to turn the volume down and flip it over to the news station. She decides to leave it on FOX News. With the volume barely playing, and the subtitles running across the bottom of the screen, she sees a ‘breaking news’ story. She wouldn’t think anything of it usually, that is until she sees the word ‘Colorado’ run across the screen. This peaks her interest to say the least. 

Clarke leans forward and places her now empty coffee mug on the coffee table in front of her. The anchorman on the news station is talking to someone on the loudspeaker. She finds out a few seconds later, that the person on the other end of the line is a police chief for the neighboring county in her area.

“Right now, we are doing our best to take control over the situation.” The chief says to the anchorman. “Me and my boys are doing everything we can at the moment. We have help on the way from neighboring counties in the area. She won’t get far.” The man sounds so certain, but usually in circumstances like this, that’s never the case. 

From what she gathers, there has been an inmate escape, and if it’s a prisoner from the large facility not far from here, then that is not good at all. Clarke knows that place to be home to some of the country’s most insane and diabolical criminals in this day and age. She swallows down a dry lump that seems to have formed inside her throat. She tries to refocus her mind on the conversation that is still going on the television.

“Now, you said ‘she’, Chief.” The newsman says. “This escapee is a woman then? You know who it is? We assumed that you still had no idea which inmate had evacuated.”

“That’s correct, John.” The police chief answers a little harshly. “We do, in fact, know who the prisoner is, and I have all of my best men on the chase.”

“Are you at liberty to discuss the details of the prisoner at this time, sir?”

There’s a long pause and the anchorman actually starts to ask the question again, thinking that their line might have gotten disconnected, but then the policeman begins to speak again. “The inmate that is now on the run, is inmate number three-hundred and seven.”

Clarke wants to laugh, because really? Three-hundred and seven? You can’t give us a damn name? That number means nothing to anyone. Just then though, Clarke hears a clank coming from the kitchen. Her heart jumps clear up to her throat and her hands start to shake. ‘What the hell was that?’ She thinks to herself. Slowly, she gets up from her seated position on the sofa and begins the short walk over to the dark kitchen. Unfortunately, the light switch is on the other side of the wall, which means that if she wants light, she has to make it all the way through the kitchen.

Clarke grabs Finn’s small baseball bat from the corner of the living room. It’s plastic, but at least it’s something. Gradually making her way towards the kitchen again, she feels her knees begin to shake. She’s more than likely over-exaggerating this whole situation, but she’s always been one to be overly anxious.

In the background, she can still hear the television. The newsman must have asked the chief of police to be a little more specific, and Clarke turns her head back towards the living room to hear his answer.

“The inmate is known as one Alexandria Woo – “

Her thought process is very quickly shut down when there’s a tight arm wrapped around her midsection, holding her arms down to her side. Another hand is tightly covering her mouth. ‘This is it.’ Clarke thinks to herself. ‘This is where I die.’

Her knees are weak. Very weak. And she knows that the only reason that she is still upright is because of the strong arms that are holding her up in this moment. She feels someone start to press in to her back, and she knows that they’ve moved impossibly closer because she can now feel their breath beside her ear.

“I’m not here to hurt you.” The voice says quietly, and to Clarke’s bewilderment, the voice is that of a female. “Please drop the bat.”

If she weren’t in a life or death situation right now, Clarke would roll her eyes. Seriously? A criminal with manners? Who’d have thunk it? She does as she’s told though, and drops the bat. It doesn’t make much of a noise as it lands on the carpeted area beneath them.

Immediately, Clarke feels the grip around her loosen up considerably, although the woman still does not let her go. “If you promise me that you will not scream, I will let you go.” The voice speaks again, and the feeling of the warm breath on Clarke’s cold ears sends shivers down her spine. In this moment, she notices how cold the bare arms of the woman are. Her skin is touching against Clarke’s bare arms as well. This woman is freezing. Clarke finds herself nodding her head in the promise that she will not scream. How could she? This woman, more than likely, is very dangerous and quite possibly has some sort of weapon on her.

The woman must feel Clarke’s small nod because she slowly, but cautiously starts to remove her arm from around Clarke’s midsection and her hand finally slips from the blonde’s lips. Words haven’t been invented yet for how terrified Clarke was in this moment. Not really for herself, but for her five-year-old son who’s asleep just a few doors down. If it comes down to it, Clarke will do anything and everything in her power to make sure that no harm comes to her son.

Timidly, Clarke turns around to face her intruder. To say that she is surprised would be an understatement. This was not at all how Clarke was expecting this person to look. Even in her sweat chilled, torn up, bloody clothes, this woman in breathtaking. Clarke can’t believe that she’s even thinking about that in this moment. The thought leaves her mind just as soon as it came. She remembers the danger that she and her son are in right now. She needs to find out with this girl wants and give it to her so that she can be on her merry way.

“I’m not here to hurt you.” The tall, brunette woman repeats after a few seconds of silence. She clearly caught on to Clarke’s fear. She’s sure that her eyes are wide and most likely full of unshed tears. “I just – I need – “

The woman is interrupted when a small, sleepy voice speaks from the hallway not far from them. If Clarke wasn’t terrified to begin with, she definitely was now. It’s Finn.   
She sees the woman slowly back into the darkness of the kitchen with her peripheral vision. 

“Mommy? Who’s that?” The young boy asks as he sleepily rubs both of his eyes.

Clarke immediately runs over to him and kneels down in front of her son. “Hey, baby.” Her voice is soft and she’s desperately trying to hide the fear in her voice. “Go back to bed, okay? I’ll wake you soon for breakfast.” Luckily, Finn just nods before looking back into the darkness of the kitchen. He doesn’t say anything, but he waves and smiles before going back to his room and shutting the door.

When Clarke stands and slowly begins to turn back around to face the intruder, she notices that the woman is backed up all the way to the door that she must have entered from. Even in the darkness, she can see how wide the woman’s eyes are. Curious. 

“I’m sorry.” The woman’s voice is even quieter now. “I’m so sorry. I – I uh… I shouldn’t have come here.” The taller woman turns her back to Clarke and twists the knob before Clarke does the unthinkable.

“Wait!” She exclaims in a quiet voice. She doesn’t know what the hell she’s doing. This woman just broke into her home and almost attacked her. The woman pauses, but doesn’t turn back to Clarke. Clarke doesn’t move either. She’s still too terrified. “You – you’re bleeding.” She sees the other woman look down towards her stomach.

“Yes.” The voice sounds so small.

After several moments of silence, Clarke does the unthinkable yet again. Damn her for being such a good person. “Close the door.” The blonde says and her voice sounds   
stronger this time; almost irritated. “Sit in that stool.” The woman hesitantly does as she’s told and Clarke actually finds it quite comical. Now this woman seems to be   
taking orders from Clarke.

The brunette sits down on the tall stool at the bar in Clarke’s kitchen and keeps her eyes on Clarke. Finally, the blonde starts to move that way, never letting her eyes leave the other woman either. When Clarke is less the two feet away from the stranger, she reaches over and flicks on the light, and is quickly blinded by green. The girl’s green eyes are stunning and a sight all in their self. “Lift your shirt.” Clarke boldly says after clearing her throat. She can see the blood stain is clearly coming from the woman’s abdomen, and there’s a lot of it.

The woman does as she’s told, slowly lifting her shirt up to right under her bra line. Clarke can’t help but internally gasp at the toned stomach of the intruder in front of her. Yep. This chick is definitely in shape. Clarke has to shake her head a bit to clear her thoughts.

‘You’re despicable, Clarke.’ She thinks to herself.

“Shit.” Clarke gasps, stepping closer to the other woman. The wound is appalling. Blood is still flowing, but just barely. It must be starting to clot or something. “What the hell happened?”

The woman turns her head to the side in an attempt to hide her face. She’s embarrassed. “Shot.” She croaks out, and Clarke notices how shaky the woman’s breathing is. “I was shot.” She clarifies. It’s only then, that Clarke notices the clothing that the girl has on. Green and white striped pants with a white t-shirt. Her brown boots are tattered and covered in mud and snow.

Shit. This is the prisoner.

Although, in the back of her mind, Clarke knew that this was the escaped convict all along, it was still something else entirely to actually see her in her inmate garb.

“Go.” Clarke says firmly. “Lie on the couch. Take off your shirt.”

The other girl looks very confused to say the least. “Wh –“

Clarke interrupts the girl before she can speak even a whole word. “If you want to live, I suggest you get your ass to the couch now.” The blonde surprises even herself with how harshly she speaks, even when she’s terrified.

The woman doesn’t question her again, but quickly moves over to the lounge in the living room. Clarke sees her sit down slowly, and start pulling off her blood stained shirt. Clarke can’t help herself but to look at the toned, tanned back of the stranger.

Damnit, Clarke.

She immediately starts rummaging through the drawers and cabinets in the kitchen grabbing a large first-aid kit and a few other things that she thinks the might need.   
Honestly, she has no fucking clue as to what she’s going to do. She’s never removed a bullet from anyone before. Hell, she didn’t even finish her second semester of med school. Clarke also grabs several clean towels from the laundry room and heads into the living area where the girl sits quietly. “Lift up.” Clarke commands. The girl does as she’s told and Clarke slides a couple of towels under her so that the blood doesn’t stain her couch.

“What are you doing?” The woman finally asks, her green eyes boring into Clarke’s blue ones. Clarke is fairly certain that she could get lost in those jade colored eyes. She could get lost in them like she could get lost in the vast forests of Colorado. They’re beautiful and wide and breathtaking.

Clarke ignores the question for a few minutes, while she gets everything ready and prepared for what she’s about to attempt to do. She pops a pair of latex gloves on her hands and finally looks back up to the girl. “I’m going to take this bullet out.” She answers matter-of-factly like it’s the most obvious thing in the world. The girl’s eyes go wide and she sees her take a long gulp. Clarke then hands her a wooden spoon that she retrieved from the kitchen and the girl looks at her with a furrowed brow. “Bite down on it.” Clarke answers the non-vocalized question. “This is going to hurt like hell.” Clarke notices the fear in her eyes and almost feels bad for the girl. Almost. “What’s your name? You’re the Woods girl aren’t you?”

The woman’s green eyes widen even more if that’s possible, and she finally nods her head. “Lexa.” She says before popping the spoon into her mouth and baring down with all the weight that her teeth would allow.

“Well, Lexa…” Clarke says, looking down and grabbing some peroxide and alcohol to pour onto a washcloth in her hand. “Try to keep quite or you’ll scare my son.” As soon as she’s finished speaking she starts wiping at Lexa’s stomach with the cloth and the woman’s muscles all over her body start to clench tightly. Clarke hears muffled whimpers coming from above her, but she doesn’t dare look. She can’t be weak. If she looks up and see the pain that this woman is in, she will feel bad for her, and she can’t do that.

As Clarke goes through the process of cleaning the area and retrieving the bullet, she can’t help but to think back through the years. She remembers when Lexa was imprisoned. It was all over the news. National and international. It’s been ten years. Ten years ago, the woman in front of her murdered her parents in cold blood. Clarke shivers at the thought. How could anyone do such a thing? Murder is awful and an unforgivable crime, but to do that to your own parents… that’s just disgusting. Even more so.

She remembers the headlines like it was yesterday.

‘Disaster Strikes Woods Industries’

‘Alexandria Woods: Disgusting Menace’

‘Teenage Daughter Slaughters Parents’

The shivers come back then and Clarke can’t help herself but to bear down a little harder than necessary. She hears more whimpers from above her.

 

//

 

‘Holy shit!’ Lexa thinks to herself. She can’t vocalize it, one because she’s biting down on a damned wooden spoon, and two because she doesn’t want this beautiful creature in front of her to see her being weak. She knows that her whimpers and groans can be heard, but that’s it. She tries to be strong throughout the whole procedure. Lexa still can’t believe that this is happening. She broke into this woman’s house, she’s on the run from the law, and she’s in blood stained prison clothes, and still this blonde-haired woman is helping practically save her life. She honestly didn’t know what she was going to do about the fact that she had a bullet wound in her stomach. All she knew, was that she had to get into this house and find some things that might help her out.

Little did she know, that that would be a gorgeous blonde woman. She still didn’t know her name. She would have to get the girl’s name if she lived through this.

Apparently, the girl knows who she is though. Which most definitely, is not a good thing. She knows that the entire world believes her to be guilty of a heinous crime. The crime of murdering her own parents. The two people that she loved most in this world. Her eyes start to water just thinking about it. It’s been ten years. She’s been locked up in this damned prison for ten years for a crime that she didn’t commit. A crime that she was framed for. A crime that her aunt framed her for.

Lexa’s parents, Alexei and Anya Woods, were two of the most incredible people that have ever inhabited this great planet. They formed Woods Industries before Lexa was even born. The company started off as a pharmaceutical company that didn’t allow animal testing. That in itself was a giant feat. After several years, they formed a group that was very similar to Doctors Without Borders. Her parents travelled the world, helping people who needed it but couldn’t afford it otherwise. Lexa wanted to someday take over the company. She wanted to be as good a person as her parents. She wanted to be and bring on a great change to the world for the better.

That all changed, quickly, when Alexei’s sister, Nia, found out that if it weren’t for Lexa, she would be the one in charge of the company. The multi-billion-dollar company. Nia had and would always be evil. Lexa and her friends would always joke and call her ‘The Ice Queen’, but it was the truth.

Nia framed Lexa for the murder of her parents so that she could get her hands on more money than even she knew what to do with, and Lexa had no way of proving it.  
She was sentenced to life in prison with no chance of parole. That was also Nia’s doing. She had her hands in every facet of Lexa’s trial. She never stood a chance.

Luckily, for her though, she has a brilliant friend that has been helping her plan her escape for years. Lexa had to get out. She has to make Nia pay for what she did. Lexa has spent years rotting in a prison cell with nothing but a heart full of sorrow and a head full of anger. Blood must have blood. This is something that she has told herself for the past ten years. Blood must have blood… and it would.

“There.” Is the only word that she hears before her eyes shut and her mind shuts off.

 

//

 

Clarke is standing in front of the kitchen sink, washing her hands and watching the blood colored water run down the drain. She did it. She actually did it. She was able to remove the bullet from Lexa’s stomach with minimal damage to the muscle there. Luckily, for the other girl, the shell didn’t hit anything important.

The brunette was quick to pass out, but that was to be expected. Clarke managed to sew her up and clean around the wound before bandaging her up and pulling a blanket over the woman’s body. Clarke would give her time to recuperate before calling the cops. She would at least give the woman that.

After Clarke gets everything cleaned up and put back in order, she begins making Finn’s breakfast. The sun is now up and the new day is officially beginning. And what a day she’s had already. There’s an escaped, murdering convict on her couch that she just saved from a gunshot wound to the stomach after said convict broke into her house.

God. Clarke was such a damn angel.

Half an hour or so went by, and she went into Finn’s bedroom to wake him up. “Good morning, sleepyhead.” Clarke grins at her tired son as he rubs his hands over his eyes. “Breakfast is ready.”

Finn doesn’t reply, he only yawns and slowly makes his way out of the bed. Just like every morning, he slips on his green dinosaur house shoes and takes his mother’s hand. “What’s for breakfast?” He finally asks in a sluggish voice when he and Clarke make it into the kitchen.

“I made you some scrambled eggs with cheese and some toast.” Clarke picks Finn up so that he can sit on one of the tall stools at the bar in the kitchen. “Is that cool with you?” She asks and smiles when he nods his head furiously in agreement. “Here ya go, bud.” She smiles again, sliding the plate across the counter to her small son. She stands there and watches him eat in silence. He will always practically swallow scrambled eggs whole, especially if they have cheese in them. They’re his favorite.

Clarke is lost in her thoughts about how old her son is getting. It seems like just yesterday that she was in the hospital giving birth to him, with Octavia by her side squeezing her hand. God. She missed Octavia. She missed her father. She missed Finn. She feels so sad knowing that little Finn will never know his father or his grandfather.

Finn’s parents refused to have anything to do with little Finn after he was born. They were still too upset and heartbroken after their son had died, and they wanted nothing more to do with Clarke. They blamed her for his death, saying that he was on his way to pick up her father when it should have been her doing that.

Needless to say, It’s just she and Finn now. On special occasions, such as Christmas and birthdays, Octavia flies in and spends a few days with them. Finn loves Octavia. Hell. He loves anyone that will talk dinosaurs and baseball with him. Typical male. Clarke grins in her thoughts before her son interrupts them.

“Who’s your friend on the couch, Mama?” His voice is quite, like he’s trying not to wake the sleeping stranger just several feet away. Clarke had almost forgotten that Alexandria Woods… Lexa Woods, was lying passed out on her couch, healing from a gunshot wound that Clarke herself had just removed.  
Clarke honestly has no idea as to what she should say. She doesn’t want to lie to her son, but he most definitely does not need to know the truth of the situation. He would be terrified and scarred for life. To be honest, Clarke’s not sure that she isn’t.

‘’She’s uh – an old friend.” Clarke wants to groan at how stupid that sounds, but Finn is five. Surely he could care less. “Yeah. A friend from college.” She really hopes that he will drop it now. Clarke knows how Finn can get. Just like any five-year-old, he asks way too many questions, and most of the time, it’s about stuff that he has no need for knowing.

He simply looks back over his shoulder one more time, at the couch, and shrugs his shoulders. “She looks real tired.” Finn turns back around to face his mother and Clarke throws on a fake grin, hoping that he’s finished. “Is she sick? She don’t look too good.”

“Doesn’t.” Clarke corrects him. “And – well… yeah… she’s a bit sick. She may sleep for a while.”

“Is she staying with us?” He asks as he gets down from the bar and takes his empty plate to put it in the dishwasher.

“No.” Clarke answers quickly, and almost a little too loudly. “She’s leaving as soon as she gets up.”

“Does she like baseball?” Clarke knew it. Random questions about the random stranger on the couch that she can’t answer. She doesn’t want to answer. This woman is a criminal. Not just a criminal, she’s a murderer. Clarke gulps at the thought. She is putting her son in danger by having this woman in their house. As soon as Lexa wakes up, she’s calling the cops. She would do it right now, but she knows that the woman should at least get a little rest from her wounds. The county will surely not get them seen about. At least not in a timely manner.

“Not sure, buddy.” Clarke finally answers, grabbing Finn by the hand and pulling him back into his bedroom. “How about you get ready? You want to go stay with Mrs. Caldwell for the day?”

“Not really.” He shrugs. She was sort of expecting that. She knows that there’s really not much for him to do out there, but she wants to get him some place safe. Some place away from the stranger on the couch. “Do you have to work today?”

Finn knows that she only takes him to their neighbor’s house when she has to go to work. Clarke doesn’t want to lie. She hates lying to Finn, but she’s starting to think that this might be for the best. “Yes. I have to go in a work for a while, baby. I’m sorry.” His face falls a bit and she sighs. She knows that he looks forward to the days that he can stay home with her and they can play baseball and watch movies all day. “How about, tonight, when you get home, I take you for ice cream?” She grins with he looks back up to her with his small, but wide blue eyes. “Would you like that?”

“Yes, please.” He smiles.

“Then that is what we will do.” Clarke smiles before pulling her son in for a hug. “Get ready, little man. I’m going to call Mrs. Caldwell and tell her that we are coming.”

 

//

 

She knows that she really shouldn’t have, but she did it anyways. She left to take Finn down the road to their neighbor’s house, and left Lexa lying passed out on the couch. Knowing full well that the woman could wake up at any moment and take off. Clarke figured that she would only be gone ten minutes at most, and that the girl would probably sleep for at least a couple of more hours.

Luckily, when she got back home, Lexa was still passed out on the sofa. Clarke let’s out a sigh of relief that she didn’t realize that she was holding. She has absolutely nothing to do today, so she makes a move to go sit in the living room. Clarke sits down in the recliner across the room from the sofa, and does nothing but stare over at the sleeping woman. She runs all of the old headlines through her head again. She sees all of the pictures of Lexa’s parents that all of the big news affiliates would post constantly. 

Clarke remembers the Woods’ being great people. They did so much good, for not only the country, but for the world. How could someone hate people like that so much that they decided to murder them in cold blood? If Clarke remembers correctly, the Woods’ were asleep when it all happened. Clarke doesn’t know if that makes it a little bit better or worse. The thought alone makes her sick to her stomach and she has to look away from the woman on the lounge.

She doesn’t know how long she ends up sitting there and staring. She can’t help but notice all of the small, fresh cuts all over Lexa’s face. Clarke notices how Lexa will shiver every few minutes, but she tells herself to not get up and get a blanket. She doesn’t deserve it. She deserves to suffer. Clarke has done enough to help her. She took a damn bullet out of her stomach for Christ’s sake. That’s more than enough to keep her conscious clear. 

That’s what she tells herself anyways.

Clarke can only skim her eyes across the strong, sculpted jawline of the other woman. It looks almost sharp enough to cut through diamond if that’s even possible. Lexa has high cheekbones, and Clarke most definitely remembers the jade color of Lexa’s eyes. They were magnificent to say the least. Clarke doesn’t think that she’s ever seen those color eyes before. Clarke mentally has to tell herself to stop thinking about this woman’s damn eyes.

Her own eyes begin to scan back down over Lexa’s body. She doesn’t have a shirt on. Just a bra and the bandages that Clarke placed over her wound. Clarke gulps when she focuses on the toned abdomen of the brunette. This girl is flawless. She’s perfect. At least physically, that is. How can someone this beautiful on the outside be so ugly on the inside? Clarke runs all of these thoughts through her mind as her blue eyes continue to skim over Lexa’ full figure, and then she’s quickly interrupted from her thoughts. She almost jumps clean out of her seat.

“You’re staring.” A quiet raspy voice from across the room says.

Clarke’s gaze shifts back up to the woman’s face and she sees that she is indeed awake. Those green eyes are staring right back at her from across the space in between them. Clarke honestly doesn’t know what to say. She’s not really embarrassed. She has no reason to be. It’s perfectly normal to stare at a stranger that’s passed out on your couch, right? Especially if said person is some sort of crazed maniac.

“I’m trying to figure you out.” Clarke says and she immediately regrets it. It sounds like she actually wants to know about Lexa, and she doesn’t. She really doesn’t, but Lexa doesn’t know that. The brunette on the sofa grins a little.

“Let me know when you do.”

They sit in silence for a while longer, just staring at each other inquisitively. It’s probably really weird that they’re doing this. Okay. It’s definitely weird, but what the hell else is Clarke supposed to do? This kind of thing just doesn’t happen. At least it’s not supposed to. There’s not a rulebook for conversations with murderers and escaped convicts that are quickly becoming house guests.

“What are you doing here?” Clarke asks, finally. Time to get down to the nitty gritty. Not that she expects this woman to tell her anything. Why would she?

Lexa raises an eyebrow in confusion. “I’m not sure that I know what you mean, Mrs. Griffin.”

Clarke freezes at this. She feels her blood run cold throughout her body. She feels it deep in her veins. How the hell does she know my name? She then vocalizes her thoughts. “How the hell do you know my name?” Clarke leans forward with her forearms laying atop her thighs.

Lexa is quick to throw her hands up in surrender. “Woah. Hey.” The brunette says quietly, trying to get Clarke to calm down. “I saw ‘Griffin’ on your mailbox on the way in.” The brunette shrugs and Clarke seems to loosen up her tight muscles momentarily. “I figured that that was you.”

Clarke then leans back in her chair and crosses her legs. She only now notices that she’s still in her pajamas, but she doesn’t care right now. She just wants to get down to the bottom of this like she’s damned police detective. “Well…” She pauses and looks around the room because looking at Lexa is becoming a little bit too distracting. Like really, Clarke needs to go get the girl a fucking shirt. “You’re right about that.” Clarke has no idea why she’s telling her this. Maybe it’s because she will be locked up soon enough and it won’t matter that the woman knows who she is. “About Griffin, but it’s just ‘Miss’.” Okay… Clarke… there was really know need for you to point that out.

This seems to peak the brunette’s interest. “No Mr. Griffin around?”

“No.” Clarke answers harshly. “But that doesn’t mean that you can do whatever the hell you want now. I can still kick your ass. I don’t need a man.”  
Lexa throws her hands up once more. “Woah. I didn’t mean anything by it.” Lexa looks a little bit scared. Clarke notices that for sure. “I just – I uh… the boy. From this morning.” Lexa takes a big gulp of air in trying to calm her nerves and she really has no idea why she finds herself asking all of these questions, and more importantly, why Miss Griffin is answering them. “Is her yours?”

Clarke almost looks a little bit taken aback from the question. She feels like this woman is being a little too prying for her taste, so naturally, Clarke answers her. Like any other normal human being would do. “Yes. He’s mine.”

Lexa smiles a bit then, but it doesn’t reach her eyes. Clarke can’t help but think what a gorgeous smile this girl has, but of course she does. Look at her. Everything about her is beautiful. Except for her soul that is.

“I can tell.” Lexa replies quietly. Her voice is meek and almost a little shy. Clarke raises an eyebrow. Not really in question, but she’s just so in her own thoughts, she wonders how Lexa could have possibly been able to tell from just their brief encounter a few hours ago. “His eyes.” She continues because she must sense the question in Clarke’s head. “You both have blue eyes.”

Clarke doesn’t say anything. She only looks at Lexa. Lexa feels like Clarke is sizing her up, and the brunette can’t help but wonder why on Earth the beautiful blonde that saved her life hasn’t called the cops on her. Lexa had actually expected to wake up in a jail cell again.

“You still haven’t answered my question.” The blonde speaks and Lexa notices that her voice isn’t as harsh as it was before. “What are you doing here? How are you out?   
And why were you in my home?”

This woman doesn’t play around. She acts as if she isn’t scared in the least bit of Lexa. Not that she should be, but most people would have fled or killed her already. They most definitely wouldn’t have saved her life, and they wouldn’t be sitting her having a conversation in a living room as if it were fairly normal. 

Lexa inhales a deep breath before replying. She knows that nothing she says will make sense. She knows that no one ever believes her. She doesn’t know why she bothers to even waste her breath. “I’m out, Miss Griffin, because I escaped.” There. Blunt and to the point. The blonde doesn’t seem to flinch. She only listens attentively. “With the help of a couple of friends, of course.” The brunette adds with a small grin.

“You seem rather proud of yourself.”

“Not proud by any means.” Lexa replies, shaking her head and looking down at her feet. She has just now realized that she is sitting up a bit on the couch now instead of lying down. Her stomach hurts for sure, but she tries to act tough. That’s how she’s gotten through these past ten years in prison. She had to act tough. Act tough or be killed. “Not of myself, anyways. I do have a few genius friends though. They’re what made this possible.”

“And by possible you mean, what? You’re out? You’re free to do whatever the hell you want now? Hurt whoever you want?” Clarke can’t help the bite in her voice. She’s mad. She’s irritated. This girl seems so cocky and proud of the fact that she’s out of prison by way of escaping.

Lexa’s brows furrow and Clarke doesn’t miss the familiar look of pain that crosses across the other woman’s face. It doesn’t linger long though because the stoic look is back. “I know that you think that I’m some sort of monster – “

“What do you think that you are?” Clarke practically shouts, interrupting the other woman.

Lexa lets out a very audible sigh. “I may be a monster by some means, Miss Griffin, but I did not do what you think that I did.”

Clarke can’t help but see the look of sadness on the brunette’s face. Lexa looks away from her and refuses to look at the blonde while she speaks again. She doesn’t want to look weak, but she also doesn’t want this woman, for whatever reason, thinking that she’s a murdering monster. 

“You didn’t what?” Clarke replies. “You didn’t murder your own parents in cold blood?”

“You don’t know what you’re talking about.” Lexa says more harshly than she meant to, which probably doesn’t look that great, but she couldn’t help it. She hates when people do this. When people just assume. That’s what the world has been doing to her for the past ten years. You’d think that she’d be used to it by now. It seems to only hurt worse as the years pass. It makes it seem like it will never end. “I didn’t kill my parents, Miss Griffin. I loved them more than words can describe.”

The blonde doesn’t say anything. At least not right away. She only stares at Lexa more. The brunette feels as if this blue-eyed girl in front of her looking into her soul, and Lexa has to admit that she’s terrified. It looks as if Clarke sees something that Lexa herself doesn’t see. “It seems an awful lot like you did, Miss Woods.” The blonde finally speaks, but her voice is calmer now. Clarke takes a deep breath and uncrosses her legs, leaning forward again. “If I remember correctly, the evidence against you was…. Immeasurable.”

“It would, wouldn’t it?” Lexa says, looking back up to meet those sapphire eyes, and she is so petrified at how they make her feel. Miss Griffin looks lost now at the change of the tide in the conversation. Lexa sees this. “When someone frames you, that’s usually how they want it to look.” She can’t believe that she’s telling this girl all of this.   
This girl, whom she doesn’t even know her first name. She knows literally nothing about this woman, except for the fact that she’s quite possibly the most breathtakingly beautiful person that she’s ever had the privilege of meeting. Her father is probably laughing at her from above right now. He always teased her about how any pretty girl would turn her into a blubbering fool. If that was the case, then with this blonde, she would probably soon be a damned vegetable.

Clarke is a little taken aback by this revelation. Lexa says that she was framed. Clarke did always feel that the evidence against her was too perfect. That the girl had been entirely too sloppy with the whole thing, not that Clarke would know much about killing people and cleaning it up, but still. “Framed?” Is the only word that she can seem to manage to make come out of her mouth right now. Lexa nods.

“I know that you don’t believe.” The brunette says, standing up slowly and startling Clarke. “No one does except for my friends, but that’s okay. That’s why I’m out. I escaped so that I could bring the real murderer to justice, seeing as the government won’t do anything about it.”

“You should sit.” Clarke says, standing up as well and walking closer to Lexa. 

“I’ve been sitting for practically ten years, Miss Griffin.” Lexa coughs. “I have to go now. I have to see this through.”

“Woah.” Clarke exclaims. “You’re not going anywhere.”

“What?” Lexa asks and then realization hits her. Duh, Lexa. “You’re calling the cops.” It wasn’t a question.

“Well of course. You actually thought that I would just let you leave? You know that I can’t do that, Lexa.” It’s the first time that Clarke has actually spoken her name and Lexa’ heart practically melts at the way the blonde’s voice wraps around the two syllables. 

“Miss Griffin,” Lexa starts and she honestly has no idea what she’s planning on saying. There’s no way in hell that this girl is just going to let her walk off into the forest. She thinks that she’s a murderer. That would be quite stupid of her. “I know that you think that I’m a low life, and maybe I am… but I didn’t do this. You have to believe me. I’m on my way to meet up with someone that can help me bring the real criminal to justice.”

“And who’s the real criminal?”

Lexa sighs. “My aunt. Nia Woods.”

“Your father’s sister? She framed you for murdering your parents? Why would she do that?”

“Yes. She is and she did. I guess if you’re a power hungry, money obsessed human, that’s something that you’re willing to do to gain that power and wealth.” Lexa answers bluntly. Clarke looks confused again. “With my parents out of the way, the company would have fallen to me. I was over the age of eighteen. Then Nia only had one obstacle left between her and taking over the company. She was next in line, so killing my parents and framing me for it killed two birds with one stone, so to say.”

The blonde beside her seems to be trying to process all of the information that she has just been given. Lexa can’t help but watch her. She looks adorable when she’s thinking. She quickly throws that thought out of her mind now. She blames it on not being with anyone in over ten years.

“You see, Miss Griffin?” Lexa interrupts the woman’s thoughts. “I have to go. I have to do this.”

There’s quite a long break in between words and Lexa is beginning to feel more than a little nervous. She starts to think in the back of her mind, that maybe she should just make a run for it. She’s not going back to that place without a fight, but then… the blonde speaks and the words that she says are more than a little confusing to Lexa.   
“You’re not going anywhere.” Clarke commands and Lexa gulps a bit. She can see the hardness is the blonde’s eyes. She knows that Miss Griffin means business, but so does she. She starts to object, but the blonde only continues. “You can stay here.”

“What?” Lexa practically shouts, startling Clarke. 

Clarke cannot believe the words that just came out of her own mouth. What the fuck? Who am I now? A friend to criminals? Will I just believe anything and everything now? Shit. I’m an idiot. She has to get the rest of this out. She has to explain herself to the other woman. “You can stay here…” She repeats. “But only because I don’t trust you to be out there.” Clarke points out the window in the living area. “I will give you a little bit of time to try and prove that you were framed. After that, I’m calling the cops.”

“Miss Griffin…” It’s almost as if Lexa is out of breath. She really did not expect this. Not in a million years. “I can’t let you do that. You’ll be charged with aiding and embedding. Plus, I can do nothing here. My friend and her equipment… I have to go meet with her.”

“She can come here and bring her things. She can stay in the basement. I’m not letting you out of my sight.” The blonde is harsh and firm and Lexa can see that there is no getting around this, unless she wants to go back to prison now rather than later. No. Later is good.

“Are you – are you sure?” 

“Not in the slightest.” Clarke answers, because truthfully she’s not. This makes absolutely no sense. She has no reason to believe that this woman is telling the truth, but she can’t help but to think… what if she is telling the truth? Then she’s been locked up for ten years and the real killer is still out there. Clarke doesn’t think that she could live with that on her conscious, so she’s going to give Lexa time. She’s not sure on how much time yet, but she’ll figure it out as they go. “Here.” Clarke says, throwing her phone to an unsuspecting Lexa. “Call your friend. Tell her that it’s this or nothing.”

Lexa hesitates for a moment but then nods. She has to take what she can get, and if there’s someone that might possibly believe her, then she can’t just abandon that. “I don’t even know your name.” The brunette says quietly, only just realizing that she did in fact not know Miss Griffin’s first name.

“And you won’t.” Clarke says, bleakly. “We are not friends. You’re pretty much a prisoner here too, but I’m giving you time to prove yourself.”   
Lexa can’t say that she’s surprised at the other woman’s words. It still doesn’t mean that they didn’t burn a little on the inside. “What about your son?” Lexa asks.

“What about him?” Clarke replies with a question of her own.

“What will he think? Who will I be to him?”

Clarke sighs because she really hadn’t thought that far ahead. Stupid. “He asked me this morning. I told him that you’re an old friend from college. I told him that you were sick.” She says, pointing to Lexa’s still exposed stomach. “That doesn’t have to change, but I don’t want you around him. Stay as far away from him as you can and you won’t have a problem from me. At least, not from that standpoint.”

Lexa nods once more before slowly turning and walking into the hallway where she starts to press several digits into the unfamiliar phone. She can feel the blonde’s blue eyes practically boring a hole through her back, but she can’t help but let out a sigh of relief knowing that she has a small chance at redemption. For the first time in a long time, she’s excited, no matter how small the chance is, and she’s will be ever grateful for the blonde stranger behind her.

The phone that’s against her ear starts to ring. It rings a few times before someone picks up, but they don’t say anything. Probably because they don’t recognize the number. Lexa speaks first. “Raven… it’s go time.”


	2. This is a Nightmare

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys! Here's the new update! I hope that you enjoy it!

“Raven… It’s go time.”

It takes a few moments for there to be a reply from the other end of the line. Lexa has to remove the phone from her ear to look at the screen to make sure that she dialed the correct number. She had, and pulls the phone right back up to her ear. She wishes that she hadn’t though because as soon as she did, a familiar voice practically screamed in her ear. “Woods! Holy shit!” Lexa lets out a loud groan and rubs her ear and gives the phone a ‘what the hell’ look. “You scared the shit out of me! I thought there for a while that they had caught you. Are you okay? Where are you? Are we still meeting at the rendezvous point?”

“Raven.” Lexa chuckles at her friend’s ramblings. It’s not been too long since she heard her voice because, luckily, Lexa had managed to get a burner phone into the prison not too long ago. She’s been in contact with Raven ever since. It was her, by the way, that managed to get Lexa out of that place. “Calm down.” The brunette says into the phone. “I’m fine. Well… I’m okay. For now, but the reason that I’m calling is because I can’t meet you at the rendezvous point.”

“What? Why? I can come get out. Give me your coordinates.” Lexa chuckles again at Raven’s antics. Her friend has always seemed like a loose cannon.

“I need you to chill the hell out, Reyes. Get it together and listen to me. I can’t meet you because I’ve kind of been caught.” She really doesn’t know what else to say. She has been caught, and it’s rather embarrassing that the short, blonde woman in the other room has managed to keep her here under her orders.

“What do you mean you’ve been caught? Lexa, what the hell? I thought that you said that you were okay.”

“I am. It’s a long story, Raven. One that I will tell you soon, but right now… I need you to come to me.” Lexa doesn’t hear Raven and she’s probably thinking that at this point, Lexa is just plain insane. Probably from all of that time locked up in the big house. “And bring everything that you will need. All of your equipment.”

“What? Where are you?”

“I will answer all of your questions when you get here, I assure you. You can trace this call, yes?” Lexa asks quietly as if the question would scare the woman in the other room. 

“Well, duh.” Raven says proudly. “Give me twenty seconds.”

The two women sit in silence for what feels like a lot longer than the twenty seconds that Raven said that she needed. Lexa is letting her nerves get to her in the silence. It gives her way too much time to think. The brunette has to admit that her anxiety level has been through the roof over the past few years. She was always living on the edge. At least, that’s what it always felt like. She wasn’t necessarily nervous or worried about herself now. No. She was worried about the safety of her friends that are helping her, and especially worried about the endangerment of the beautiful woman just down the hall and her son. That’s what has Lexa’s anxiety acting up and blowing through the roof. The thing is, though, no one would ever know it. Lexa is a mastermind at covering up her feelings and thoughts. Not ever her friends can crack her most of the time.

“Okay. I have you, Woods.” Raven speaks into the receiver, breaking the silence and Lexa’s thoughts about the danger that she is putting all of these people in. “You’re just outside of Silverton. That’s good. There’s nothing around for miles. The nearest town is at least ten miles away.”

“Okay. When can you be here?”

“If I leave within the next couple of hours, I can be there by morning.”

“Good. Do not let Lincoln or Nyko know where I am.” Lexa says hurriedly. She feels bad keeping secrets from her friends, but she doesn’t want all of these people knowing where Miss Griffin lives. She trusts Lincoln and Nyko just as much as she trusts Raven, but all of those people being here would definitely be a red flag and Lexa can’t have that. Not right now. “The place where I’m staying…. There’s a woman here and she has a son. She won’t allow me to leave without alerting the authorities, but she is giving me a chance. That’s something that no one else has given me. I can’t have anything happening to them.”

Another pause. Raven is the queen of agonizing silence. “So, let me get this straight… You, Lexa Woods, are being held hostage by some older woman and her kid?” Lexa’s ear rings again when the laughter breaks through the phone. “This is too good.”  
Lexa groans. “She’s not holding me hostage, Raven. And she’s not old. She looks to be maybe a couple of years younger than myself. She saved my life, Ray.” Lexa let’s out a sigh thinking about how crazy it was that she was still here and that someone had actually been caring for her. “During the escape, I was uh – I was shot. I could have died. She removed the bullet and cleaned me up before stitching me.”

“Holy shit. Are you okay?”

Lexa chuckles this time. “Yes. Just sore, which I’m sure is perfectly normal to a gunshot survivor.”

“That’s so badass, Woods.” Of course Raven would think that getting shot and surviving was badass. Her friend never ceases to amaze her. “Is she hot?”

“What?” Lexa exclaims a little too quickly. She wasn’t expecting the question. “Raven.” It’s a warning from Lexa, and she can hear more laughter coming through the phone and she can only roll her eyes.

“She is, isn’t she? Otherwise, you would have answered me. Holy shit. I cannot wait to meet her.”

“She’s made it entirely clear that we are not friends, Raven. She wants nothing to do with us. Your job is to get here and help me catch Nia so this nightmare will finally be over.”

“So, she doesn’t believe you then?

“No. Of course not. No one ever does.” Lexa answers, but then thinks back over the conversation that she had only minutes ago with the young Miss Griffin. “I mean – I don’t know. Maybe there’s a sliver of hope. Why else would she keep me here without calling the law?”

“True.”

“I have to go now, Raven. Safe passage on your travels.” Lexa grins. That was always something that her father used to say to her. “And remember… all of your equipment and no one else. Got it?”

“Got it, boss. See you in the morning.”

The line clicks, signaling Lexa that the call is over. Well, shit. Now this means that she has to go back out into the living room and face the music that is Miss Griffin. Taking a deep breath, and running a hand over her face, she finally turns and makes her way back. When Lexa enters the living room, she sees the blonde is still sitting in the recliner that she was in earlier. Miss Griffin hasn’t noticed her yet, so Lexa takes this moment to really get a good look of the other woman. She’s gorgeous. That’s one thing that Lexa is most certain on. Her blonde hair is thrown up into a messy bun, and what Lexa wouldn’t do to see it down and shrouding the woman’s shoulders. And those damned blue eyes. How could Lexa ever forget those. The first time that she had witnessed them, earlier this morning, she could feel her heart constrict inside her chest and her breath become labored. It was like she was drowning in one of the world’s deepest oceans. Falling further and further until there was nothing. Nothing but blonde hair and blue eyes. And oddly enough, she was more than okay with that. It’s like she had forgotten what all was going on around her.

Lexa knew that she had to stop these thoughts though. She didn’t have time for this. Didn’t have time for a distraction of this magnitude. Yeah. Maybe she’s being a little dramatic about the whole thing, but she hasn’t met anyone as intriguing as this in well… ever.

She doesn’t know how long she stood there staring and being, probably, really creepy, but all of a sudden she catches blue eyes boring into her own. Lexa doesn’t look away though. She didn’t want to act like she had just been caught in the middle of something that she most definitely didn’t need to be doing. Luckily, for her, her dark skin makes her blush a little subtler than it really is.

“Uh – here you go.” Lexa says stupidly, walking towards the blonde and handing the woman her cell phone back. “Thank you.”   
The brunette says softly, her gaze never leaving the blonde’s. It’s almost as if they were magnets, drawing her in and not letting her go. “You know… uh – for everything.” The blonde doesn’t say anything, and Lexa has no idea what she wants to say. There’s so much that she wants to say, but is afraid to, and Lexa Woods is never scared. “Thank you for giving me a chance.” There.   
Simple and to the point. That was going to be as good as she could do right now, plus she’s pretty sure that the blonde really doesn’t want her talking right now.

Griffin (God, Lexa hates not knowing the woman’s first name) stands up from her sport on the recliner and looks down at her phone awkwardly. Lexa thinks that she’s going to just walk off and not say a single word. Really, though, Lexa wouldn’t blame her one bit. “I would say that I’m not doing it for you, but… really, there’s no other reason.” The blonde shrugs. “If you’re telling the truth, and you didn’t do it, then I don’t think that I could live with myself knowing that I sent you back to prison.” The comment would have sounded a lot nicer if Miss Griffin wouldn’t have sounded so irritated and disgusted at herself as she was speaking. 

The blonde starts to walk off and leave Lexa standing there alone, but the brunette speaks up before she has the chance to. “I want to help you.” Griffin turns around with an incredulous look on her face at Lexa’s words. “I mean, like uh – I want to help with things around the house. It’s the least I can do for all of the trouble I’ve caused. If Raven and I are to be staying here, then I want to pull my weight.”

“You want to do chores?”

Lexa nods. “Yes. I have to do something to keep me busy or I’ll go insane. I won’t be able to help Raven with the hunt for Nia. I know nothing of the stuff that she does.”

“Very well.” Clarke says before finally walking off and into the kitchen. She opens the refrigerator and starts to pull random ingredients out. Turning on her heels and setting the food on the counter behind her, she almost freaks when she realizes how close Lexa is.

“I’m sorry, Miss Griffin.” The brunette says quietly, and takes a few steps back. “Is there something that I can do to help?” Lexa nods towards the food on the countertop.

She hears the blonde let out an audible sigh before she mumbles something. “Clarke.”

“What?” Lexa couldn’t pick up the word that the other woman had said.

“My name.” Clarke starts again with an exasperated sigh. “It’s Clarke.”

“Clarke.” The brunette’s eyes are wide at the new discovery. A beautiful and unique name for an equally beautiful and unique woman. It’s a good thing that Lexa doesn’t have super hearing or else she would be able to hear Clarke’s heart beating out of her chest at the way that Lexa says her name. She’s always liked her name, but she loves it coming from the brunette beside her. 

Clarke quickly shakes her head again to rid herself of these thoughts. Admittedly, Lexa is gorgeous. That is a given, but she can’t be attracted to someone like her. She just can’t. It’s not safe.

“I thought that you weren’t going to tell me your name, Clarke.” There it is again damn it. She’s already regretting the decision to tell Lexa her name. For more than one reason. The devilish smirk that Lexa is sporting doesn’t make it any better. She’s probably one of those people that knows how hot they are and flaunts it. So annoying. But hot. Definitely hot.

“Yeah, well… You would have figured it out eventually anyways.” The blonde shrugs like it’s not that big of a deal. “There’s tons of bills and letters lying around with my name all over them. Might as well get it out of the way.”

Lexa really wishes that Clarke didn’t hate her so much, but she certainly understands her reasoning behind everything. This woman is smart, and smart is so fucking attractive. Especially on one Clarke Griffin. She most definitely wants to know more about this woman, and she plans on learning it. Whatever it takes. “I understand why you hate me so much, Clarke.” Lexa says after a couple of moments of quietness. She wants Clarke to know that she’s going to try to be a better person, even though she didn’t commit the crime that the world thinks that she did. The blonde looks up to her from where she’s chopping an onion on an old wooden chopping board. Her sapphire eyes are not wide, only curious. “But I intend to change your mind about me.” Lexa adds a warm smile hoping that it’s not too much.

“We’ll see.” Is all that Clarke says and that is more than enough for Lexa. She feels a little bit strange knowing that there’s now one more thing that she looks forward to fixing. For so long, all that she has worried about is getting out of prison and hunting Nia down to get justice for her parents and clear her own name of the crime. Now, she’s looking forward to changing people’s opinions of her. Most specifically, Clarke. 

“I hate to ask, because you’ve already done so much, Clarke, but is it possible that you have a shirt that I can borrow?” That damned devilish smirk is back, and Clarke most certainly was not swooning. Nope. And the comment most definitely doesn’t make Clarke’s blue eyes gaze over the brunette’s toned stomach. How could she have forgotten that Lexa was standing around in her house with only prison pants and a sports bra on?

Clarke has to eventually clear her throat and divert her eyes back to cutting the onion in front of her. “Um – uh yeah. Let me finish this and uh – I will go find you something. You can wait in the living room.” 

Lexa grins because the beautiful blonde is clearly flustered. Bingo. 

But she gets that Clarke does not want her in here in the kitchen with her right now, or probably anytime, so Lexa makes her way to the living room to plop comfortably down on the couch. Lexa must doze off at some point, because the next thing she knows, there’s a hand on her shoulder pushing, and out of instinct from previous years’ experience, she quickly reaches out and grabs the wrist that’s touching her. Her eyes open soon after. It’s Clarke, and she looks terrified. Lexa’s death grip on the blonde’s wrist let’s go almost immediately and the words start to just flow out. “Clarke – I uh – I am so, so sorry. Did I hurt you?” Lexa is in a state of panic. “God. I’m so sorry, Clarke. I just – uh – it’s just a reflex now. Usually if – if you wake up to someone pushing you, in the pen, they’re wanting to start trouble.” Lexa shakes her head again and then notices that Clarke no longer looks scared. She almost looks amused. “Clarke…”

The blonde stands up straighter from where she was leaned over the couch and crosses her arms over her chest. “It takes a lot more than that to hurt me, Woods.” Her comment causes the brunette to furrow a brow in confusion. She wasn’t expecting such a strong, firm tone in the blonde’s voice. Not after Lexa had scared her like that. “Get up and follow me if you want clothes.”

That’s all she says before turning on her heels and walking down the dark hallway. It takes Lexa a couple of moments to gather herself, but then she pushes off the sofa and quickly follows the blonde in front of her with long strides. The last room on the right side of the hall is off to itself a bit, Lexa notices, as Clarke pushes the door open and flicks on the light inside. There’s a lot going on in such a small space, but it definitely feels homey. This must be Clarke’s room.

There’s a queen-sized bed pushed up against one of the walls in the corner. The sheets are a deep, forest green and the duvet is the color of chocolate. The tones are all rather earthy and free. Lexa loves it. The past ten years has been nothing but white, greys, and the occasional blacks. It made her feel cold, and to be honest, she didn’t need any help in that department after everything that happened.

Beside the bed, there’s a small nightstand holding a small lamp, a remote control, and a picture frame. While Clarke is digging through a dresser on the other side of the small room, Lexa takes the few steps to pick up the picture frame. It’s clearly a special photograph to Clarke. The frame is heavy and thick and exceptionally crafted. Lexa notices that the other frames in the room, on the walls and desk, are much cheaper looking frames. 

The brunette runs her thumb over the carvings in the frame, feeling the rough texture that seems to be in every detail. It’s beautiful. The photo in it, however, is even more lovely. It’s of Clarke and her son. Clarke, naturally, is breath-taking and her son clearly takes after her. His smile is big and bright, making his big blue eyes shine in the glossy texture of the photograph. Lexa doesn’t get much of a chance to continue looking when Clarke sneaks up on her again and practically yanks the frame from her hand, setting it back down on the nightstand.

“I’m sorry.” Lexa says, looking into Clarke’s sapphire eyes. “I shouldn’t have –“

“You seem to say ‘I’m sorry’ a lot.” Clarke replies harshly. 

The brunette shrugs and looks down at her feet. “It’s something that you learn quite young when you’re nothing but a big screw up.” Since, Lexa is looking down at her feet, she misses the scowl fall from the blonde’s face. Her features soften just a bit.   
Clarke feels bad for being such an asshole now. 

“Here.” Clarke finally says, offering a pair of sweatpants and a t-shirt and hoodie to the other woman. “It’s not much, but it will do.”

Lexa musters up a small smile and takes the clothes offered to her. “Thank you, Clarke.” She says softly, making Clarke swoon internally. Damn it, Clarke. Get it together. The brunette turns and begins to make her way out of the room. Clearly, she’s not wanted in here. Before she gets completely out of the room, though, she hears Clarke say something. 

“Finn.”

Lexa turns her head to look at Clarke in confusion. “I’m sorry?”

“My son.” The blonde mutters, pointing at the picture frame. “His – uh – his name is Finn.”

Lexa takes in the woman in front of her, looking over her face and she notices that there are some deep, sad memories lost in those eyes. It makes Lexa’s heart hurt for her and she doesn’t even know what or why. “That’s a lovely name, Clarke. He’s very handsome.” Lexa replies and Clarke only nods, making Lexa turn around and walk out the door.

 

//

 

Clarke really wishes that Lexa had her own clothes. Not that Clarke doesn’t mind someone borrowing her clothes, but just seeing Lexa in Clarke’s clothing makes her think things that she shouldn’t. ‘It’s been way too long.’ Clarke thinks to herself as she paces around the kitchen, finishing up the dinner she’s been making for the last couple of hours. She, truthfully, hardly ever spends this much time in the kitchen. Not that she doesn’t know her way around one, but she and Finn usually like to keep things simple. 

Today, however, she’s been staying in here to avoid a certain brunette that sits in her living room. It’s just weird, right? Why the hell did she concoct this idea? Who, in their right mind, would ask an escaped convict to stay at their house? Where their child lives? This was an awful idea. 

“When will Finn be home?” Lexa asks from the living room, looking up from a book that she holds tightly in her hands. The question startles Clarke out of her own thoughts.

Clarke looks up from where she had just set a baking dish down from the oven with a pair of pink, floral mitts that Mrs. Caldwell   
gave her. “Now.” Clarke answers. “I – uh – I’m going to run and get him.” Lexa’s eyes don’t leave hers because the brunette can sense that Clarke is about to say something else. “Please – just don’t touch anything while I’m gone.” The blonde continues, pulling on a thick jacket that was hanging beside the door. “Can you do that?”

“Yes, Clarke.” Lexa answers before looking back at her book. Clarke doesn’t notice that the book has been upside down the entire time. Lexa has been too focused on the blonde to do anything else. After Clarke walks out the door, bringing in the chill of the late afternoon, Lexa finally lays the book down and lets out a long breath that she didn’t realize that she was holding.

All her life, Lexa has been good at reading people. She’s always prided herself on being able to do so. She’s a people person because of it. People tend to like her because she can sense how to act and respond around them. She adapts.

With Clarke, though, it’s different.

Lexa can’t get a read on her. She’s still so absurdly confused about the whole situation. Clarke doesn’t strike her as stupid, but harboring a criminal isn’t very clever. Even though, technically, Lexa isn’t a criminal, but Clarke doesn’t know that for sure. This is a good thing though, right? Maybe Lexa has finally found someone that believes her… or that could possibly believe her someday. Hopefully someday soon.

 

//

 

“Okay.” Clarke breathes out, before blowing her warm breath into her hands to try and warm them. “Buckle up, little man.” She looks in the rearview mirror of her truck to make sure that Finn does indeed buckle his seat belt. He grins when he sees his mother looking at him in the mirror and gives her a thumbs up when he’s done strapping himself in.

Clarke smiles back. She can’t decide on how to approach the fact that Lexa will be living with them for a little while. She must tell Finn, obviously, but she doesn’t know where to start. She doesn’t want to confuse him. Clarke hates lying to him, but, for now, she knows that it’s for the best. 

As she backs out of Mrs. Caldwell’s driveway and turns on to the desolate, ice slicked road to return home, she glances in the rearview mirror again. “Did you have fun with Mrs. Caldwell?”

“Yes, ma’am.”

“What did you do?”

“We made cupcakes and played checkers and she tried to teach me a card game, but I didn’t understand.” He shrugs, causing Clarke to chuckle.

“So, you’re getting pretty good at checkers then?” Clarke asks. She knows that he’s been practicing at home so that he could possibly, one day, beat Mrs. Caldwell at her own game. He nods. “Good. One day, I’ll teach you how to play chess. Would you like that?”

Her son’s smile widened, causing her to grin as well. “Yes, ma’am.”

They drive another short distance, until Clarke can see their home up ahead. It’s now or never. She just has to bite the bullet. “Finn?”

“Yeah?”

“So… you – uh – you know my friend that was at the house this morning?”

“Yes. From school?”

“Umm – yes.” Her heart hurts from lying to her son. She hates it, but she can’t possibly tell him the truth. Especially because he could let it slip to the wrong person at any time and she could go to prison herself. “She’s going to be staying with us for a while.”

“Really?” He looks excited. Poor kid. They never have company out here in the sticks. The only visitor that they ever get, is Octavia and she only comes every few months. “You think she’ll play catch with me?”

Clarke furrows her brow, out of the vision of her son. “Uh – I don’t know, buddy. We’ll see.” She really doesn’t want Finn and Lexa to get close. One, because it will only hurt Finn’s feelings when Lexa leaves and two, because she doesn’t trust Lexa around him. Period.

As soon as Clarke and Finn pull up outside at their home, Finn unbuckles himself and practically jumps out of the truck. He goes to run in the house before his mother’s voice stops him. “Shoes!” He screeches to a halt and quickly kicks off his snow and mud covered shoes before slinging the door open and running in.

He runs all the way into the living room and stands right in front of Lexa on the couch. She’s got the book up in front of her again, but when she hears the boy in front of her, she pulls it down a bit to look over at him. He’s so damn cute, Lexa can’t help but grin, and to top it all off, he’s holding out his hand for her to shake. “Hi.” He smiles bright and wide. “I’m Jacob Finn Griffin.”

Lexa sets the book down beside her, taking his hand in hers and shaking with a smile that’s almost as bright as the young boy’s. “Well, it’s a pleasure to meet you, Jacob Finn Griffin. I’m Lexa.”

“Okay, Lexa.” His tone is serious now and he plops down beside her on the sofa. She doesn’t know if it’s okay for her to be this close to him. She quickly glances over to the door where Clarke is standing, watching them closely. The blonde looks scared, but doesn’t say anything. Lexa looks back down at Finn. “I have a few questions for you.”

Lexa grins again, and she swears she sees a hint of one on Clarke’s face. God, how she wishes she could see Clarke smile. Lexa is sure that it’s probably one of the most stunning things she’s ever seen. “Well, then, Finn, I may have some answers.”

“Number one.” He holds up one finger. “Do you like baseball?”

Lexa chuckles. “Very much. You know, when I was young, my father would always take me the watch the Padres play.”

“Really?” Finn beams, like that is the coolest thing that he’s ever heard. Lexa nods. “That’s so cool! Do you think that maybe some time you can play catch with me? I have an extra glove.” He looks over to his mother who has an unreadable expression on her face and then he’s looking back at Lexa. He leans in closer and brings a hand over his mouth like he’s about to tell her a secret. “Mom’s not that great at it.”

This causes Lexa to laugh out loud and Clarke huffs. “I heard that.” The blonde says, walking into the kitchen and grabbing a few dinner plates.

Lexa tries to stifle her laughter long enough to answer Finn’s question about playing catch with him sometime. She absentmindedly reaches for her abdomen before answering him. “I’d love to play catch with you as soon as I’m feeling better. I’m – uh – I’m not feeling that great right now.” She looks over to Clarke to get some sort affirmation that what she said is okay. The blonde nods.

“Okay. Number two.” He holds up two fingers. “What’s your favorite dinosaur?”

Lexa can’t help herself but to grin again. This kid is great, and so smart and mature sounding for his age. Clearly, Clarke has done an impeccable job raising him. She starts to wonder where the boy’s father is, but quickly tries to erase the thought from her mind. It’s none of her business and if she were to ask, that is exactly what Clarke would tell her. “Well, obviously, it’s the velociraptor.” She says in her best serious voice, trying to match Finn’s persona now.

He grins. He must approve of her answer. “Mine too! Mom likes the pterodactyls.” He says, causing Lexa to look over to the blonde in the kitchen. Their eyes meet and they probably look at each other for a little too long before Finn is clearing his throat. Lexa looks back to the boy sitting beside her. “She says because she wishes that she could fly like them.”

“That’s a very acceptable reason.” Lexa smiles, and chances a quick glance over to the blonde, who averts her eyes. Lexa looks back at Finn. “Flying is pretty cool.”

“I guess.” He shrugs.

“Okay, guys.” Clarke interrupts them. “Time for dinner. Finn, go wash your hands please.”

“Yes ma’am.” He replies before smiling at Lexa and jumping of the couch to run down the hallway to what Lexa assumes the bathroom.

Lexa must be lost in her own thoughts, staring into space, because Clarke breaks her from them. “Are you going to eat?”

“Oh.” Lexa stutters out. She didn’t realize that Clarke cooked for her too, but come to think of it that was her being stupid. Of course Clarke had cooked for her too. The blonde has already proved to be an exceptional human being. She wouldn’t just let Lexa starve to death. “Yes – uh – thank you.” Lexa gets up and hesitantly walks into the kitchen, making sure to leave plenty of space between herself and Clarke. “It smells good.” Lexa says softly, trying to make some sort of conversation out of nothing.   
Clarke doesn’t say anything, causing Lexa to become even more uncomfortable and a bit irritated. “He’s really great.” She says, accepting a plate of spaghetti from Clarke. “Thank you.” She adds as she sits on one of the bar stools beside her.

“He is.”

“Very bright.” The brunette adds. “Is he in school yet?” Clarke looks at Lexa like she is ready for the brunette to stop talking and asking her questions about their life. Lexa just can’t seem to help herself though. She finds herself wanting to know more about   
Clarke and Finn. Lexa doesn’t know if Clarke was going to answer her question or not, but Finn makes his way into the kitchen then, answering the question for Lexa. 

“Not yet.” There’s a slight frown there that Lexa notices. “I wasn’t old enough. Next year.” He adds.

Lexa grins before taking a bite of her pasta, and feels embarrassed when she practically moans at how good it tastes. She’s lived off prison food for the past ten years. Homemade pasta is something that she never thought that she’d have the privilege of eating again. “That class won’t know what hit ‘em.” Lexa adds after swallowing her first bite. Finn grins at her comment before starting to devour his food as well. Lexa looks over to Clarke who’s just begun to eat as well. “This is really great.” Lexa says, gesturing to her plate with the fork in her hand. “Thank you, Clarke.”

The blonde only nods and Lexa wants nothing more than for the blonde to talk to her. To smile. She’s going to make that one of her goals while here. She wants to see Clarke smile. Genuinely smile.

 

//

 

After much debate, Lexa convinced Clarke into letting her clean up the kitchen while Clarke got Finn ready for bed. Lexa smiles as she washes the dirty dishes in the sink, thinking about Finn’s rambling throughout their dinner. He went on and on about baseball and dinosaurs, which Lexa has concluded, are his favorite things. He likes to draw. She learned that as well, however he did add the tidbit of information that Clarke liked to draw as well, and that she was actually quite good. Lexa kept that locked away in her mind to talk to Clarke about at another time. 

Lexa is just finishing up and drying her hands when Clarke walks back into the kitchen. Neither of them say anything at first.   
Clarke moves around the area, putting up the now clean dishes back into their rightful spot. Lexa watches so that she can remember for next time. She wants to be able to help Clarke out as much as she can. It’s the least that she can do after everything that Clarke has done for her.

“When will your friend be here?” Clarke asks, breaking the silence as she puts up the last dish.

Lexa’s caught off guard, because she’s not used to the blonde starting an actual conversation with her. Not that this is really a conversation, it’s just a question, but still. “Umm – she said sometime in the morning. I’m not sure on the specific time.”

The blonde only nods again, and Lexa just wants to grab her by the shoulders and shake her, making her look into Lexa’s green eyes and saying, ‘Talk to me.’ Lexa is itching to have a normal conversation with someone. Only after knowing Clarke for less than twenty-four hours, Lexa already knows that Clarke is anything but normal. In a good way. A really good way.

“How close is the nearest town?” Lexa asks as she follows Clarke into the living room. “I uh – when Raven gets here with my money, I really do need to try and buy a few clothes and other basic necessities.”

Clarke looks at her like she’s lost her damn mind. “I doubt going into town two days after you escaped from prison would be the smartest thing to do. It’s national news after while. I can’t turn on the TV or the radio without hearing about it. I have to turn it   
off.” 

Lexa looks at the blonde hard. The brunette is studying her and Clarke shifts a little uncomfortably on her feet. “Raven can handle that. They’ll be looking in the complete opposite direction by the time she’s through.” Lexa replies, and then her curiosity gets the better of her and she’s asking the blonde another question. “Why do you have to turn it off?”

“What?” The blonde asks, obviously confused.

“Why do you have to turn the radio off when they start to talk about me?”

Clarke shrugs as if she doesn’t really know the answer to that question herself. “It makes me uncomfortable.”

“It makes you uncomfortable or I do?” Lexa boldly asks, causing the blonde to finally meet her gaze. She swears that she sees fire in those blue eyes.

“I think that you know the answer to that question, Woods.” Lexa can’t help but flinch at Clarke’s tone and the use of her last name. It’s so informal. So impersonal. It makes her really start to think that Clarke absolutely hates her. Despises her.

Lexa sighs and crosses her arms in front of her chest. “Clarke, if I make you so uncomfortable and you hate me so damn much, then why the hell am I here?” The brunette is finally beyond frustrated and is over tiptoeing around Clarke.

Clarke clearly wasn’t expecting Lexa to ‘grow a set’ so to speak and call her out. The blonde steps a bit closer and holds out a finger at Lexa. She’s in full on mom mode now. “You’re here, Lexa,” Clarke puts emphasis on both syllables of Lexa’s name. “Because I’m allowing you to be. It’s here or prison. Your choice.”

“Of course I would rather be here, Clarke, but – “ Lexa looks around the room as if she were trying to find the words that she were looking for. “I just – I know that you’re being so gracious allowing me to stay here and not turning me in, but I just am trying to understand why you hate me so.”

Clarke must see the sincerity and possible bit of sadness in the brunette eyes and hear it in her tone because she too softens. “I don’t hate you.” The blonde replies, startling the both of them. “I just – I’m frustrated with myself. I put me and my son in this position, and now there’s no way out.” The blonde looks over to Lexa. “And before you say it… No. I’m not letting you go. I’m not putting others out there in any potential danger.”

Lexa is aware that she probably looks super pissed off right about now, and it’s probably not helping her case, but she just can’t help it. “Really, Clarke? I’ve only known you for several hours now, but – you seriously still think that I’m capable of something like that?”

“I don’t know you.” Clarke says harshly and the fact that she has hardly been using Lexa’s name hasn’t gone unnoticed. The blonde is trying to distance herself. Trying to make this a little more impersonal. “This conversation is over.” Clarke practically growls and Lexa wants to argue, but she knows that she’s already done enough damage for the night. The blonde points over at a wardrobe in the living room. “There’s blankets and pillows there. You can sleep on the couch or the floor. I don’t care.” She utters before turning and walking down the hallway. 

It makes Lexa’s stomach turn when she hears the click of the lock in Clarke’s bedroom.

“She’s scared of me.” Lexa utters to herself as she stands in the semi-darkness of the living room.

 

//

 

It felt like minutes, no seconds, since she had fallen asleep. It had taken forever for sleep to find her. She doesn’t know why.   
This couch in this living room should be like a damned five-star hotel compared to the practically piece of cardboard and thin blanket that she’s slept on for the past ten years. 

Truthfully, Lexa doesn’t know why she’s already woken up. The first thing that she notices, when her sleepy eyes learn to focus, is that it’s still dark outside. She can see clearly through the window in the living room, right above the television. Fog has taken over the most part of the glassy frame, so she knows that it’s still cold. Of course it is. 

It’s freezing.

Lexa is so not used to this weather. Yes. She’s lived in this area for quite a while now, but she was rarely allowed outside at the prison. Her aunt Nia had a lot of pull behind her. She made sure to make Lexa’s life as much of a living hell as she could. Lexa was born in sunny Los Angeles where her parents company had really only started to grow. After that, she lived in many places, traveling the world with her parents and loving every second of it. New York, Tokyo, Miami, Paris, Prague. Just to name a few.

While she’s lost in her random, sleepy thoughts, Lexa suddenly realizes what had woken her up in the first place because she hears it again. It’s a scream. A very loud, shrill scream. One of those that you often hear on the movies that makes your skin crawl. She immediately sits up on the couch and wipes her eyes before she hears another small yell. Up on her feet now, Lexa makes her way, in a brisk walk, down the hallway towards the noise.

It’s coming from Clarke’s room. Shit.

She’s locked the door and Lexa can’t get in.

Right before Lexa makes a bold decision to kick the door in, she hears a small voice come from the dark behind her. “It’s okay.”   
She hears Finn say. Lexa spins around quickly, almost giving herself whiplash in the process. She’s sure that her eyes are blown wide, and her breath is coming in ragged, but she doesn’t care. She furrows a brow at the little boy in confusion and he speaks again. “It’s mom. She’s having a nightmare.”

“What?” Lexa asks quietly. “A nightmare? Are you sure?”

Finn nods his head at her question, and the look on his face is a sad one. “It happens a lot. It shouldn’t last too much longer.”

Lexa is looking back and forth between the young child in front of her and the door behind her where small whimpers are coming from the other side. Her instincts tell her to bash the door in, but if Finn says that it’s only nightmares, then she will believe him. “I don’t like this.” The brunette says softly, shaking her head and kneeling down. She slowly places a hand on one of Finn’s small shoulders. “Are you okay? Do you – uh – need anything?”

The young boy shakes his head with a small smile. “I’m fine.” A yawn. “I think I’m going to try to go back to bed now.”

“Okay.” Lexa replies softly. “Come get me if you need anything, okay?”

“Alright.” He says before turning and walking back towards his room. Lexa turns around to look once more at Clarke’s bedroom door. She doesn’t know why, but her heart aches for the blonde behind the door. She’s heard screams like that before, and whatever kind of nightmare Clarke is having, it’s a bad one. Lexa wants to just tell her that it’s okay… that she’s here… but she knows that that would probably only make it worse. Clarke doesn’t want her here. Matter of fact, Lexa wouldn’t doubt if she’s the one causing the blonde’s nightmare. “She’ll be okay, Lexa.” The small voice startles her again and she can’t help but think she’s going to have to learn to get used to living with a child in the same house. She turns once more to make her way back down the hallway to the living room, watching Finn walk back into his room in the process.

Settling back into the couch, she knows that she’s not going to get any sleep whatsoever. She’s not worried about it though. If Clarke isn’t sleeping soundly, then Lexa shouldn’t be able to either. Clarke was nice enough to save her life, not turn her in, and allow her to stay here when she had no reason to believe Lexa in the slightest. If Clarke isn’t comfortable, then there’s no way that Lexa wants to be comfortable either.

Sleep must eventually claim her though, because a few hours later, Clarke is poking her head around the corner of hallway wall and finds a sleeping Lexa still on the couch. The blonde let’s out a breath that she didn’t realize she was holding. She doesn’t really know what she was expecting… for the brunette to be gone and half of their stuff to be missing, perhaps. Clarke was most definitely not expecting Lexa to still be here, passed smooth out on the sofa in her living room with her mouth halfway open and an arm hanging off of the side. She tells herself that the only reason that Lexa is still here is because the woman was exhausted. Exhausted from her escape. Exhausted from her run. Just the thought that early yesterday, Lexa was running away from the cops after escaping prison for murder, makes Clarke’s stomach turn. She still can’t believe that she is allowing Lexa to stay here. The blonde is starting to think that she is definitely going insane.

She turns to walk back down the hallway and peeks into her son’s room. Naturally, he’s already up. Most mornings, he is up before Clarke. When he sees his mom, he grins wide and sits back on his bed. He had been in the floor working on a puzzle of Tyrannosaurus Rex. “Morning, bud.” Clarke smiles and walks in to join him on his bed. “Sleep good?”

“Yes ma’am.” He nods his head. There’s a bit of a pause. Clarke realizes that he wants to say something else, so she lets him. “You had nightmares again.”

Clarke’s heart breaks at the statement. It wasn’t a question. She hates when this happens. She must have woken Finn up again. It’s happened too many times for her to remember. She knows that it has to scare him, but he tries to act like it doesn’t affect him. She wishes that they didn’t affect her either. It’s been five years and she still has the nightmares. Not every night, but close enough. All that she’s is her father and Finn’s face during their wreck. Losing both of them all over again each time that this occurs. It’s so real. So vivid to her. She hates it. Usually, she wakes up in a pool of her own sweat with her muscles tense and aching. She always feels so tired afterwards. They really must do a number on her.

“I did, but it’s okay.” Clarke answers her son and the worried look on his face. “I’m okay. I’m sorry that I woke you up.” The blonde says quietly, placing a kiss to the crown of little Finn’s head, and pulling him closer.

“It’s okay, mom.” He smiles sadly and there’s another long pause. “Lexa was freaking out though.”

She snaps her head to look down at her son, who is now looking at her. “I woke her up too?” Finn hums in reply, and Clarke can’t help but think, ‘damn it. I showed her weakness without even realizing it.’ Clarke doesn’t really know why, but she’s already terrified of Lexa. This only makes it worse. “What do you mean that she was freaking out?” Her curiosity getting the better of her.

The dirty blonde-haired boy in her arms shrugs before looking back at his mom. “When I came out of my room, she was already at your door. It looked like she was about to knock the door down. Like the Hulk.” He grinned. He loves the Hulk. “She looked scared.”

Clarke is very curious as to why Lexa was so worked up that she looked like she was going to bust the bedroom door down.   
Which, in all honesty, Finn could be exaggerating. He’s very good at that. She tries to smile. “I doubt she was scared, bud.   
Maybe just curious.”

“No.” He says almost instantly, shaking his head to match his verbal answer. “She was scared. She kept looking at your door. Even when I was going back to bed. I told her that you would be okay.”

Clarke smiles a small, sad smile. Finn was always so mature and understanding for a boy his age. She doesn’t realize that she’s pulled him tighter and closer to herself until he lets out a playful grunt. “Oh. Sorry.” Clarke chuckles and her curiosity gets the better of her again. “What did she say?”

Finn, the king of shrugs, shrugs again, causing Clarke to grin. “She kind of just nodded her head and looked back at your door one more time and then she came and squatted down in front of me. She told me that if I needed anything to come wake her up.”

Finn’s mother can’t help the shocked look that probably crosses her face. “Did she really say that?”

Her son laughs out loud then. “Mom… she’s your friend. She was just making sure that I was okay.” This statement seems to cut deeper than it should have. Lexa and Clarke were not friends. They weren’t anything to each other. Possibly more enemies than friends. Only uncomfortable acquaintances, but Finn didn’t know that, so she only smiled and tried to veer away from the conversation all together. 

“What do you want for breakfast?”

“I’m kind of craving Cheerios.” Her son smiles. 

Clarke stands up with a smile in return and starts to walk out the door towards the kitchen. “Regular or honey nut?”

“Regular please.”

 

//

 

The whole time that Finn is eating breakfast at the counter in the kitchen, Clarke is smiling at him and shushing. Lexa was still asleep only a few feet from them, and the longer that Clarke could keep her asleep, the better. She wasn’t ready to deal with that. Not yet.

Once Finn was finished eating, he asked Clarke if he could go outside for a while. She agreed to it as long as he would wear lots of layers. The cold was awful this month, and would only get worse as December got closer. After cleaning up the small mess that she and Finn had made in the kitchen, Clarke decides to sit in the living room and read until Lexa woke up. She needed to talk to her and hopefully Finn would still be outside.

Holding the book in front of her face as she sits in the recliner across from the sofa, Clarke is too preoccupied to read. Her blue eyes keep peering over the pages of the book that she has yet to start, looking at the sleeping woman on her couch. She feels like a super creep the more that she watches Lexa sleep. She had done this yesterday as well, but she honestly can’t help it. For some unknown reason, she’s drawn to her. Not physically of course, but her eyes always seem to wander towards her. Clarke can’t deny that Lexa is gorgeous. Even after years of wear and tear in prison, Clarke has still never seen someone as lovely. 

The way that Lexa’s lips pooch out every so often when she lets out a deep breath in her sleep, has Clarke mesmerized. The way that the other woman’s long, slender fingers, that are hanging off of the couch, seem to twitch every couple of minutes as if to some sort of beat. The way her brown locks frame her sleeping face and sculpted jawline. Everything about Lexa physically is perfect and Clarke hates herself for thinking that. She really does.

“You’re staring again, Clarke.” The sleepy voice mutters, startling Clarke again and this time she is sure that her face is blushing. She brings her eyes to meet Lexa’s and other woman has that damned gorgeous smirk on her face, and even though Lexa is still clearly half asleep, she still looks like a goddess.

Trying to play cool, and not really knowing what to say either, Clarke goes with what she had said the day before. “Well, Lexa, I’m still trying to figure you out.” This causes Lexa to actually laugh out loud, and Clarke’s insides twist at how lovely the brunette’s laugh is. It almost makes Clarke want to smile herself, but she doesn’t.

Lexa sits up from her lying position on the sofa and kicks the small blanket off of her legs. She stretches her long arms above her head and Clarke only slightly wishes that she wasn’t still wearing a hoodie so that Lexa’s toned arms were visible. She gets something even better though when said hoodie rides up the woman’s toned abdomen, showing off ever sculpted line that her stomach has to offer. Clarke is sure that she just got caught staring again. Shit.

“You should have woken me.” Lexa finally says. “This is your home. If I’m in the way, then you should just let me know.”  
Clarke ignores the comments from the brunette and after a few minutes, she almost feels bad for it so she speaks again. “Did you sleep well?” The question clearly surprises the other woman.

“Uh – yes… I did. Thank you.”

“Finn said that I woke you up last night too.” The blonde says. She really didn’t want to bring it up, but she thought that she might as well get it out of the way. Have it over and done with. “I’m sorry.” Clarke clears her throat and Lexa realizes that the girl is clearly uncomfortable. “I – uh – sometimes that happens.”

Lexa shakes her head. “You have nothing to apologize for, Clarke. I was just worri – uh – I just didn’t know what was going on.” 

The brunette has her fingers crossed that the blonde didn’t catch her near slip up. Announcing that she was worried about a woman that she had only met the day before would be creepy, right?

Clarke’s throat tightens and she tries to swallow down the dry lump that always seems to form in her throat when Lexa talks. She most certainly heard what Lexa almost said and she finds it a little bit weird. Clearly Lexa didn’t mean anything by it. She decides to change the subject completely. “There’s cereal and milk in the kitchen.” She stands up and clears her throat. “Umm – you can help yourself.”

Just then, the backdoor bursts open and Finn runs in with a smile. His face is red and chapped from the chill outside. His chest is rising and falling quickly as if he’s been running. “You’re up!” He exclaims excitedly, looking at Lexa who is still sitting on the couch.

She smiles at him. “I am.”

“Want to play catch?” Finn asks immediately. “You don’t have to throw if you don’t feel like it, but it would be fun to have someone to throw to who can actually catch it.” He glances over to his mother and then back to Lexa.

“Finn!” Clarke exclaims, causing Finn and Lexa both to burst into a fit of laughter. “Not cool.” She has to suppress a smile.

“I guess I can do that.” Lexa grins, but is quickly cut off by Clarke.

“Lexa, are you – “ Clarke stops herself from asking the question that was on her mind. She started to ask if she was sure. She really didn’t need to be out playing catch in the cold, while recovering from a gunshot wound. Not very smart, but Clarke refrains. The blonde is afraid that it would seem too much as if she cared about the other woman’s health. Luckily for Clarke, she doesn’t have to start to change her words because then, there is a small knock on the front door.

The three of them snap their heads to the door. Clarke and Finn because they’re not used to having company and Lexa because she’s terrified of someone finding her. Not only finding her, but finding Clarke and Finn with her. That would not end well for them.

Clarke makes her way to the door, slowly. There’s no peep hole so she has to crack the door open a little to look outside. It doesn’t take long until Lexa is almost right behind the blonde, just in case it’s unwanted company. “I’m sorry.” She hears Clarke say out the door. “Who are you?”

Lexa doesn’t hear the first part of the answer on the other side of the door, but she hears the last and it’s a very familiar voice. “I believe you’re harboring someone I know.”

“Raven?” Lexa calls out and Clarke turns around to face her, opening that door wider in the process. 

The smile on Raven’s face is wide and familiar. It’s been way too long since Lexa has seen her. Over ten years to be exact. 

They’ve only communicated by phone every once and a while. “Holy shit, Woods!” Raven exclaims before running in, dropping her bags and throwing her arms around Lexa’s neck. Lexa hugs her back tightly and feels tears well up in her eyes. “I can’t believe it’s you.” Raven says quietly. 

“It’s me.” Lexa laughs. “I’ve missed you so much.” She says to her best friend, finally letting her pull back from their hug.

“Ditto, babe.” Raven replies before they’re both interrupted by a small voice.

“Swear jar!”

Both brown headed woman turn to look at Finn with raised brows. Raven’s more skeptical than Lexa’s. “What?” Raven asks and they both hear Clarke chuckle behind them. Lexa wishes that she could have seen it.

“You swore.” Finn says matter-of-factly. “That’s a quarter in the swear jar.” They follow the trajectory that his small index finger seems to be pointing at across the room. There’s a jar full of quarters sitting on a shelf in the living room.

“You swear that much?” Lexa asks Finn in surprise, with a hint of a smile at the confused look on Raven’s face. She knows that her friend has no idea who this blonde and this boy are. 

Finn shakes his head ‘no’. “No. Those are from mom.” He points to Clarke with a smile and Lexa quickly turns to look at the blonde.

“Clarke?” Lexa feigns surprise at this. “How could you?” Lexa grins and Clarke only rolls her eyes.

“Finn… would you please go back outside for a minute?”

“Yes ma’am.” He answers and runs back outside. Clarke is now standing in front of Lexa and Raven with her arms crossed in front of her chest.

“You are?” Clarke asks in true Clarke fashion.

“Raven Reyes.” The Latina girl answers with a smile, holding out her hand. To Lexa’s surprise, Clarke reaches out and takes it hesitantly and she can’t help but feel a little bit jealous that Raven gets to hold the blonde’s soft looking hand. “Best friend to this one here.” She points a thumb back to Lexa. “And genius extraordinaire.”

“I’m guessing that I have you to thank for this one,” Clarke points at Lexa. “Being here now.” Her tone is sarcastic and Raven must pick up on how much Clarke really doesn’t want them here.

“From what I hear,” Raven starts with her very familiar cocky attitude. “We have you to thank for that.” Clarke raises an eyebrow. “You won’t let her leave, right? So, looks like we’re stuck here.” Raven answers.

Clarke lets out a long huff and looks back and forth between both brunettes. “You can set up in the basement.” The blonde says. “From what I hear… you have work to do, Miss Reyes.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> What did you think? Let me know in the comments below. I also really enjoy kudos. ;) Thanks for reading you guys!
> 
> Follow me on Twitter @asuzh90


	3. Puppets on a String

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> What's up, guys? Here's the newest update! I hope that you enjoy it! :)

“So, we’re supposed to just stay here until what?” Raven asks Lexa quietly, as they stand in Clarke’s small, cold basement. They’ve spent the past hour or so setting up all of Raven’s equipment that she brought to help aid in the search for Nia and evidence of Lexa’s innocence. “Until we find Nia? Until we clear your name? What?”

Lexa can tell that Raven is more than a little irritated at their current situation. Her friend doesn’t like the fact that they’re literally in the middle of nowhere, where they’re have to set up all of this fine equipment in this tiny, freezing basement. They’re safe house would have been a better place to set up, but since Clarke will not let Lexa leave… this is the best that she and Raven are going to get. “I don’t know, Ray.” Lexa answers her friend, shrugging her shoulders in typical Lexa Woods fashion. “I’m not sure what she’s waiting on.”

“And who is she anyways?” The shorter woman asks as she finishes plugging in a large cord that makes about four monitors come to life on the make shift table in front of them. “Who does she think she is?”

“Raven.” Lexa warns, causing Raven to cut her eyes up to her. “Don’t.”

“Don’t what? This is sketchy, Woods. Why keep you here?”

“That’s the sketchy thing that you see happening here?” Lexa chuckles sarcastically. “Raven, I literally just escaped from a high-profile penitentiary, not two days ago, and now I’ve called in my genius friend to help me track down evidence of a possible mob boss killing my parents ten years ago. Clarke is being cautious.” Lexa says assuredly. “Not sketchy. I’m lucky that it was her and not someone else.”

Lexa’s pacing around the room stops abruptly when she notices the way that Raven is looking at her now. The taller brunette raises an eyebrow at the shorter one. “So, that’s her name, huh? Clarke? This is the first that I’ve heard it.” Lexa says nothing. She only nods her head and props herself up on the wall beside the bottom of the staircase. “You like her.” Raven adds, and it’s not a question.

“What?”

“You like her.” Raven grins devilishly. “Why else would you be defending her like this?”

Lexa shakes her head at the ridiculousness of Raven’s accusation. “You’re insufferable. I’m not defending her. I’m only saying that she doesn’t have some ulterior motive, Reyes.” Lexa takes a deep breath before continuing. “She’s just a good person trying to give me a second chance at life. Okay? And I literally owe her my life, so shut the hell up about it.”

Raven rolls her eyes, but doesn’t say anything else undesirable about Clarke. “Aye, aye, Commander.”

Lexa lets out a loud groan, causing Raven to laugh. “Don’t call me that.”

“Call you what?” A different voice startles them both coming from the staircase. It’s Clarke and she’s slowly making her way down the stairs. Lexa moves from her propped up position on the wall to step a little further back from the blonde.

“Nothing.” Lexa answers quietly, but gets a weird look from Clarke. “Just a stupid nickname from high school is all.” The brunette shrugs her shoulders as if to brush the whole topic off.

“Ahh…” Clarke replies awkwardly. “Are you two almost done setting up?”

Raven let’s out a laugh. “The question should be, ‘Is Raven done setting up’ because Lexa hasn’t done a damn thing.”

The blonde eyes Lexa’s reaction with curiosity. It’s weird seeing her with someone she knows. Someone who is a friend to her. Someone from her past. “Because you won’t let me touch anything.” Lexa groans.

“This is true.” Raven retorts, looking over at Clarke. “Don’t let her touch any of your electronics, Clarke.” Clarke is clearly taken aback by Raven calling her by her first name. Lexa notices this. “She doesn’t know a damn thing about them, especially now.”

“Now?” Clarke asks.

Lexa answers the question before Raven can throw out some dumbass comment again. “She means because I’ve been – gone – for so long.” Lexa grins at the beautiful, blue-eyed girl beside her. “I’m not exactly up to code on all of the trends and things going on now, Clarke.” 

Lexa’s freaking gorgeous grin is literally going to make Clarke weak in the knees if she doesn’t stop doing it. And the way that the taller brunette says her name isn’t helping matters any. It’s like everything that the girl does just oozes sex appeal. It’s like she’s not even trying either. It’s a little bit endearing, but a lot intimidating.

Before Clarke can say anything in reply to Lexa’s comments, Lexa speaks again. “Speaking of.” She turns to look at Raven again. “Did you bring my money, Reyes? I’m in desperate need of some clothes.”

Raven nods her head and stands up from where she’s lying under the computer table. The shorter woman walks over to the corner of the basement where all of her personal belongings are and grabs a black, leather briefcase. Clarke notices that it has a lock on it, and her interest is peaked. “I was sweating bullets trying to get this through customs, just so you know.” Raven says. She sets it in front of Lexa on a plastic, fifty-five gallon barrel and puts in the code on the lock before opening it up. Clarke doesn’t hide the fact that she is completely and utterly shocked. Her mouth is wide open and eyes are blown. Raven and Lexa chuckle a bit. The brief case is filled with hundred dollar bills. There’s hundreds of thousands of dollars in there. Clarke has never seen that much money in her life. She was brought up with wealthy parents, but still… she hasn’t been in the best way, monetarily wise, since Finn died. She barely makes ends meet now.

“Don’t tell me that you robbed a bank too.” Clarke says, without even really thinking. She’s looking at Lexa now with a creased brow.

“Clarke,” Lexa says, and Clarke notices how hurt the taller woman looks by the comment. She mentally curses herself for saying it. “I told you that I’m not a criminal.” Lexa looks back down at the briefcase because she can’t stand the intensity of looking into those blue eyes any longer. “And I meant it.” 

“Lexa, I’m –“ Clarke starts to say something, definitely not apologize, but then she’s interrupted.

“Lexa’s parents had more than enough money kept hidden for situations like this.” Raven said a little harshly. She didn’t like the way that Clarke spoke to Lexa. She knows nothing about her friend. She has no right to judge her. “Well, not exactly like this, but they wanted to make sure that Lexa was taken care of. As soon as she was imprisoned, I went to the house to gather everything before the Ice Bitch moved in.”   
Raven looks away from Clarke and back down at the briefcase. She digs under some of the bills and pulls out a black wallet. When she opens it, there are no more than a dozen different credit cards. All with different names. “These are good to go too.” Raven adds, looking at Lexa. “Different aliases from different states. They won’t know that it’s you and won’t be able to track you.”

Lexa nods in understanding. “Thank, Ray.”

“No problem.” Raven grins. “Now get out of here. The both of you.” Lexa looks at her friend with a ‘what the hell’ look. “I’ve got work to do.” 

Lexa doesn’t like it, but she doesn’t argue. She starts to walk back up the stairs and into the main part of the house. She doesn’t realize that Raven holds Clarke back. “I don’t know what you think that you’re trying to do here,” Raven starts in, looking deeply into profound sapphire eyes. “But you don’t get to do that.” Clarke raises a brow in misunderstanding. “You don’t get to judge her. You know nothing about her except for what the goddamn media says about her, but guess what. They know nothing about her either. So, you need to get that through your head. I understand that you saved her life, and I owe you for that, but that doesn’t give you a lifetime pass to treat her like shit. I’m pretty sure that she’s been through enough of that in the past ten years to last her the rest of her life.”

Clarke is more than a little taken aback from the way that Raven is talking to her. She didn’t realize that Raven and Lexa were so close and that Raven would be this protective over Lexa. Clarke knows that she’s been an asshole towards Lexa. There’s no doubt about that, but what’s she supposed to do. She doesn’t trust her. Yeah. She may end up being completely innocent, but Clarke doesn’t know that. She guesses that she might want to try and learn a little more about her. For research purposes of course. “I’m – I didn’t – I’m sorry, okay?” Clarke starts. “This is my first time in a situation like this, so excuse me if I forgot to read the ‘How to Treat Escaped Convicts’ manual that they gave me when I bought this house.”

“That was a good one.” Raven says sarcastically. “But I’m not the one that you should be apologizing to. I’m not saying that you two have to be all buddy-buddy or anything, but if we’re all going to be under one roof for the next little while, then it would be awesome for it to not be completely awkward.”

Clarke only nods before walking up the stairs. Before she’s complete up though, she yells back down. “I’m going to take Finn to stay with a neighbor while I take Lexa to buy some clothes.” That’s the only info she gives Raven before shutting the door and storming off into the living room.

 

//

 

Clarke has just dropped Finn off to stay with Mrs. Caldwell for the afternoon, and she’s now sitting alone with Lexa in the vehicle on their way to Silverton to go shopping. To call the situation ‘awkward’ would be an understatement. Thankfully, or unthankfully, Lexa breaks the silence. “So, have you always lived her in Silverton?”

Clarke almost thinks about just ignoring her and continuing their drive in silence, but then she thinks back to everything that Raven said to her. She was right. Clarke doesn’t know Lexa. Lexa has been nothing but kind to she and Finn, and all that Clarke has done, other than pulling that bullet out of her, is be an asshole. She decides that now is as good a time as any to start trying to get to know her a little better. Raven was right about that too. They were going to be stuck together for a while. “Uh – um no. I haven’t.” Clarke answers and then realizes that Lexa would probably like to know where she is originally from. “I’m originally   
from the Los Angeles area.”

“Seriously?” Lexa asks, looking at Clarke with wide green eyes. “Hmm…”

“What?”

“Nothing.” Lexa says, looking back towards the road. “I was just thinking about how weird it is that we could have ran into each other before.” Lexa turns back to look at the blonde, who is sitting there with a confused look on her face. “I could have met you before, Clarke Griffin.” Lexa grins.

“And how is that?”

“I’m from L.A. too.” Lexa shrugs. “Originally. That’s where my parents started their business.” Clarke doesn’t say anything, she only hums. “I wish that I could have.”

“Could have what?” Clarke can’t believe that she’s actually talking this much to Lexa, and quite frankly, Lexa can’t believe it either.

“Met you before.” Lexa answers truthfully and doesn’t miss the fact that Clarke almost gives herself whiplash turning her head to look at Lexa. It makes Lexa smirk to herself internally. “I just mean that if you would have known me before all of this,” Lexa gestures her hand around in the air at nothing in particular. “Then you would trust me, or at least believe me.” Lexa’s tone is a bit sad now, and Clarke realizes then how badly   
Lexa wants people to believe her. Maybe she is telling the truth after all. Clarke doesn’t know what to say. There’s nothing really that she can say, so she doesn’t say anything. They sit in silence for several more minutes, and it’s still uncomfortable. Clarke can’t imagine a time when being around this woman would make her comfortable at all.

“What is it that you do, Clarke?” Lexa pushes, breaking the silence once more. Clarke wants to roll her eyes, but she refrains from it. “Am I keeping you from work?”

“I was off yesterday, but I called in today.” Clarke answers shortly. “I’m a receptionist at a local clinic in Silverton.” The blonde doesn’t seem proud at all. Lexa can tell. She almost seems embarrassed by it. Lexa wants to tell her that there’s nothing embarrassing about that job. Someone has to do it. A job is a job and she is doing what she has to to take care of herself and Finn.

“Like a health clinic?” Lexa asks, and Clarke only nods. “I’ve got to admit that after the way that you pulled that bullet out of me and patched me up so well, I thought that you were a nurse, or a doctor perhaps.”

Clarke lets out a sarcastic chuckle. “When I was in college, I was in med school.” She can’t believe that she just said something so honest without really being prompted. She’s delving into dangerous territory. Stuff that she doesn’t talk about with anyone. Especially almost complete strangers.

“Oh yeah?” Lexa asks, looking back at Clarke. “That doesn’t surprise me.” The brunette grins and what little of it that Clarke saw out of the corner of her eye, makes her swoon. “If you don’t mind me asking, how come you didn’t finish?”

Clarke clenches her jaw. She really wants to tell Lexa that it is really not any of her business, but she refrains. She can talk about this. She can do this. Lexa would be out of her life soon enough, and it would be as if no one in the world knew. “Uh – my boyfriend and I – uh we moved out here. He got a job.” There. That was enough, right?

She hears Lexa hum to herself. “He must have been pretty important to you to move all the way out her to the middle of nowhere with.” Lexa can’t help but feel a little something inside her chest when Clarke said her ‘boyfriend’. It’s really none of her business. Clarke’s sexual preferences, that is. She was only just curious. Nothing more.

“He was.” Clarke answers truthfully, and she’s quite shocked at herself for answering at all. “We – uh – we were engaged.”

Lexa smiles a sad smile, because obviously that didn’t work out. She didn’t want to just beam with happiness, just in case it was still a sore subject with the blonde. “What was his name?” Lexa asks softly, almost as if she were to terrified to continue this conversation. She halfway expects Clarke to turn around and rip her head off at any moment. Being around Clarke has begun to be like walking on eggshells.

Clarke doesn’t know why, or how even, she was even considering answering that question, because it was sure to bring up even more questions, and she didn’t know if she was ready for those just yet, but clearly that didn’t matter. Clearly, she was just ready to pour out every droplet of personal information pertaining to her life to this woman that she knows almost nothing about. “Finn.” The blonde answers, catching   
Lexa’s gaze quickly before turning back and watching the road. “His name was Finn.”

Lexa knows that she is staring now. She can’t help herself. She’s trying so hard to read Clarke, in this moment more than most. Of course, she wants to ask the obvious questions pertaining to the answer she was just given, but she knows that it’s none of her business. She knows that she is probably getting way too far into the personal territory, so she keeps it to herself. She keeps it bottled up inside, for Clarke’s sake.   
She doesn’t want to make the blonde uncomfortable. If Clarke ever wants to tell her anything, she will do it on her own terms. So, Lexa turns back around and shifts a little bit uncomfortably in her seat. She stares out the window for a few moments before Clarke breaks her from her thoughts.

“You’re not going to ask questions?” The question is soft, and a little bit confused. Clarke is curious. She was halfway expecting to have to tell Lexa to just drop it, but Lexa did that for her.

To both of their surprise, they pull up in the parking lot of a mall. They both hadn’t realized how long they had been driving. They were already here. Lexa turns her green eyes to meet Clarke’s, and she has to swallow back every compliment that she wants to give the blonde right now, because that would be a little bit inappropriate, given their situation. “It’s personal to you.” Lexa says with a shrug. “And I understand that I’m not someone that you want to share that type stuff with.” Lexa gives Clarke a small smile. “It’s none of my business, Clarke. If you wanted to tell me something, then you would tell me. I won’t pry anymore.”

Clarke unbuckles her seatbelt and gets out of the car, so Lexa does the same. Before they walk off, Clarke looks over the top of the vehicle and catches Lexa’s gaze. “Thank you.” She says, and she doesn’t really know why she says it, but she does.

“For what, Clarke?”

“I’m not really sure.” Clarke answers honestly, causing Lexa to grin a bit, which in turn causes Clarke to swoon. “For not prying I guess.” Clarke replies again, and Lexa swears that she catches the slightest glimpse of a smile before the blonde walks off. Lexa isn’t far behind. “Wait” Clarke says, stopping her tracks and moving to the side of the sidewalk in front of the main entrance of the mall.

“What is it?”

Clarke looks around like they’re being followed, and when she speaks again, her voice is low and quiet. “Won’t people, you know, recognize you?” Lexa smirks before pulling a cap, that Raven had given her, out of her back pocket and sliding it on her head. She pulls her ponytail through the hole at the back of the cap. “If people are looking for you, Lexa, then I highly doubt a simple ballcap will keep them from recognizing you.”

“True.” Lexa says, truthfully. “But, Raven is back at your place working on that.” Lexa walks over to one of the windows of the building and sees a TV on. She points at it before looking back at Clarke. “See?”

Clarke looks too, and the ‘Breaking News Headline’ scrolling across the bottom of the screen reads, ‘Alexandria Woods spotted just outside of LaGuardia Airport in New York City.’ Somehow, there’s a very blurred picture accompanying it. It definitely looks like Lexa from the side, with her hair down and a leather jacket on. All Clarke can think about is how bad she would like to see Lexa in a black leather jacket. Clarke looks back up to Lexa, who is dawning her famous ‘sexy smirk’, and asks. “How?”

Lexa laughs a little. “Raven’s a genius. I told you this, Clarke. You’ve got to learn to trust me.” She adds before winking at Clarke. Clarke is pretty sure that her heart is about to burst out of her sternum. Like what the hell? Why did she have to wink? ‘Hopefully, Lexa doesn’t realize the affect that she has on me.’ Clarke thinks to herself.

When Clarke doesn’t say anything, because she’s too busy looking confused, Lexa speaks again. “That’s an actual photo of me at LaGuardia a month or so before I was arrested. Raven pulled some photos, doctored them a little and then let them loose into the internet. From what I hear, it doesn’t take long for this type of thing to make it around the world.” Lexa smiles. “Most eyes will be scanning around New York now, I suppose.”

“Good idea.” Clarke barely croaks out, because she is still under the affect of Lexa’s fucking wink.

“Come one, Clarke.” Lexa says. “I will desperately need your help shopping.”

“What? Why?” Clarke asks, suddenly pulled out of her thoughts, as she runs to catch up to the brunette.

“Because the last time that I was able to wear real clothes, pointless scarves and belts were all the rage, and let’s not forget the bangles. God…” Lexa groans. “The bangles and the damned cropped jeans.” Lexa shivers, and to her utmost surprise, Clarke lets out a loud laugh. When Lexa looks over at the blonde, she’s pretty sure that her heart melts and beats out of her chest all in one movement. Clarke’s smile is the most perfect thing that she’s seen in her entire life. Clarke’s smile is something, that if Lexa would have had a picture of it while she was away, prison would have been so much more bearable. It’s something that songwriters write songs about and poets only dream about. Lexa knows that it sounds extremely corny, but seeing Clarke smile like that, to be able to hear her laugh for the first time… that makes Lexa want to be a better person all together. 

“What is it?” Clarke asks, breaking Lexa out of her daydreams as they walk into the mall.

Without even thinking about the consequences of her words, she says them. “You should do that more often.” Lexa smiles.

“Do what?”

“Smile.” Lexa grins and then shrugs as if it were nothing. “Suits you.”

“I smile.” Clarke says firmly, and Lexa doesn’t miss the blush cover the blonde’s pale skin.

“Not in front of me, you don’t.” Lexa says, but Clarke says nothing else. They both walk, with Clarke a little bit in front of Lexa, until the blonde leads them into a store. “So this is a – uh – hip type place?”

“Hip?” Clarke teases, raising a brow. Lexa rolls her eyes. “Everything in here is pretty much up to code as far as the trends right now. I’ll sit over there.” She points to some sofas in front of the fitting area. “And you can just try on whatever type thing in here fits your style. I’ll wait.” 

Lexa nods and the blonde walks off to go find a seat on the sofas. Luckily, the store is not busy at all. Possibly because it’s lunch time on a Wednesday and most people in the town are at work right now. After a while, Lexa walks past Clarke to go into the fitting room. Clarke notices that the brunette’s arms are full of different things, and she can’t help but wonder if Lexa will walk out and show her her choices. She’s definitely not going to ask her to. Clarke still can’t get over the fact that Lexa winked at her, and she told her that she wished that she would have met her before, and she told her that she should smile more.   
Clarke’s mind has been overloaded with all of these things in just a couple of hours, and it’s just too much.

To Clarke’s surprise, after a few minutes, Lexa walks out of the fitting room pulling at the clothes on her body, like she’s a little uncomfortable. Clarke’s throat goes dry and her heartbeat picks up again. It’s definitely been way to long since she’s been with anyone, because no one ever has this effect on her. Not like this. It’s almost unbearable. 

The first outfit that Lexa has on, is the one that Clarke has been practically dreaming about since she saw that picture of Lexa with a leather jacket on. Lexa has on a pair of dark, high-waisted skinny jeans with a pair of short black boots. The top that she has on is a pale pink color, that’s tucked into her jeans. The v of the shirt comes down really low on the other girl’s chest, and Clarke has to quickly avert her eyes before   
Lexa catches her staring. Over the pale shirt, however, is a tight black, leather jacket. Lexa has removed her ballcap temporarily, and her long brown locks are flowing over her shoulders.

Holy shit.

Clarke shifts uncomfortably in her seat, and tries to be very subtle about the way that she clenches her thighs together.

“How’s this look?” Lexa asks, finally looking away from the mirror and to the blonde. Clarke notices that Lexa looks a little unsure of herself.

The blonde doesn’t want to come off as too eager or anything, but he answer comes out a little too quickly. “Good. Really, good.” Clarke answers, taking a large gulp of nothing. 

Really. Really. Really. Really. Good. 

“Do you not like it?” Clarke asks. 

“It’s not that.” Lexa says. “It’s really very comfortable, but it’s just a style that I will have to get used to.” The brunette shrugs. “Are you sure it looks okay?” Clarke can only nod and hope and pray to God that Lexa didn’t notice the way that she was practically stripping her with her eyes the entire time. “Okay. I trust you, Clarke.” Lexa grins, and something about that statement warms Clarke’s heart, whether Lexa meant it that way or not. “I’m going to try on something else now.”

“Okay.”

After a few minutes, Lexa comes back out again. This time, the jeans that she is wearing are lower waisted and have rips in both of the knees. She has on a cropped white V-neck t-shirt that shows of her very tanned, very toned abdomen and Clarke has to move her hand up to her mouth subtly, to make sure that she’s not drooling. She paired the outfit with a pair of white Converse.  
Lexa clearly feels more comfortable in this outfit. Her smirk is back as she looks at Clarke and does a little twirl, and Clarke can’t help but be a little happy that all she had to do to make Lexa a little more comfortable was to talk to her. “I’m so glad that Converse aren’t out of style.” Lexa beams.

Clarke grins, and when she does, Lexa’s smile widens. “I don’t think that Converse will ever go out of style.”

“We can only hope.” Lexa agrees. “So, this,” The brunette gestures to the outfit. “Is this okay?” Clarke doesn’t miss the sexy smirk come across Lexa’s face. It also tells Clarke that Lexa knows that she looks good, she’s only fishing for Clarke to say something.

Clarke raises an eyebrow in a challenging way. “It’s alright.”

“Just alright?” Lexa teases, and she can’t help but wonder if this is them flirting. It’s been so long, she’s not sure if she even remembers what it is. “Oh, okay. Well, I guess I won’t get this one.” She says before turning around like she’s going to walk back into the fitting room.

“No!” Clarke practically jumps out of her seat and then she realizes what an absolute fool she sounded like just then. She wants to bury her face in her hands and hide from Lexa for the rest of the day, but she doesn’t. She can’t let Lexa see the affect that she has on her. “It looks fine, Woods. You should get it.”

Lexa smiles that damned smile before going back into the fitting room. After another half hour or so, Lexa tries on some more outfits. She ends up buying every one of them. Before Clarke walks out the door to go wait in the car while Lexa pays, the brunette notices Clarke eyeballing a necklace by the door. As soon as Clarke walks out the door, Lexa strides across the room to grab the necklace before checking out. She doesn’t even bother to read the two-hundred-dollar price tag.

“Want some lunch?” Clarke asks, when Lexa gets back into the car with all of her shopping bags.

“Sure.”

The two of them drive a little ways down the road to a diner that Clarke frequents. It’s very small and homey, and like the shop that they were in earlier, it’s not crowded either. “This is Finn’s favorite place.” Clarke says softly, as Lexa looks over the menu. Clarke doesn’t bother looking at the menu because she practically has it memorized.

“He’s so awesome.” Lexa grins over her menu. “I almost died when he called Raven out on swearing this morning. That was hilarious.”

Clarke rolls her eyes. “He’s the swear police.”

“Clearly.” Lexa smirks. “So, since you’re the one that curses so much and puts the money in the jar, does Finn get to keep the money?” Clarke glares at her before nodding. Lexa laughs at Clarke’s expression and answer. “That’s priceless. Usually, it’s the kid having to pay up. Please tell me that the swear jar wasn’t your idea.”

“Unfortunately, it was.” Clarke says, like it’s no big deal as she looks around the diner. “I never thought that he would turn that around on me.”

“Smart kid.”

“Too smart.”

After they’ve almost devoured their food, the waitress comes up with the check and Lexa quickly grabs it before Clarke can. Before the waitress can walk away, Lexa stops her and looks at Clarke. “What does Finn like?”

Clarke raises a brow, but answers nonetheless. “He really likes the chili cheese fries.”

Lexa smiles before looking back at the waitress. “Can we get an order of chili cheese fries to go and added to this check?” The waitress answers and smiles before walking off.

“You didn’t have to do that.” Clarke says and it probably came out a little more harshly than she meant for it to. She’s still weirded out by this situation, and even though she’s trying a little bit harder to be nice and understanding with Lexa… it’s still hard. It’s scary.

“I wanted to.” The brunette across from her shrugs and starts to pull her new wallet out of her pocket. Within a few minutes, their waitress is back with Finn’s fries and the new check. Their server hands the piece of paper to Lexa before Clarke can argue. Lexa doesn’t miss the eyeroll that she gets from the blonde. “Thank you.” Lexa nods to the woman, who then walks off to leave them be. Lexa grabs one more fry off of her plate and pops it into her mouth before looking at Clarke. “Ready to go?” Lexa asks, because she had noticed that Clarke had seemed to have been done for the past few minutes.

Clarke nods in answer. She’s still more than a little bit irritated that Lexa paid for her food. She’s more than capable of paying. The two of them walk back to Clarke’s vehicle in silence, and once they’re in and buckled up, Lexa breaks it. “Did I do something wrong?” The brunette had most definitely noticed the change in the atmosphere between her and Clarke over the last several minutes. She isn’t completely sure what changed.

The blonde driving, starts to back the car out of the empty parking lot and pull back out onto the small road that leads back home. After what feels like an eternity, Lexa thinks that Clarke is just going to start ignoring her again. “I’m more than capable of paying for my food.” She finally answers exasperatingly.

Lexa raises an eyebrow at the other woman, even though she knows that Clarke isn’t looking at her. “That’s what this is about?” Lexa huffs and lets out a sarcastic laugh. “That was me trying to do something nice for someone who’s helped me, Clarke.” Lexa starts to shake her head at how infuriating the blonde is. She knows that she shouldn’t lose her cool. She has no place to do so, but she just can’t help it sometimes. “Look,” Lexa starts in again, and Clarke can’t help but to look over at the other woman now. Her tone is more fierce than usual. Clarke knows that she’s hit a nerve. “I get that you don’t like me, Clarke, but you’re stuck with me, and that’s your own fault. Either stop being an asshole or let me leave.” Lexa regrets her word choices immediately.

“Excuse me?” Clarke groans and slams on the breaks, pulling the car to the shoulder of the road. As soon as they’re completely stopped, the blonde turns to face Lexa and the brunette gulps at the look in those blue eyes. “What is your problem?”

Lexa chuckles again. She’s not letting Clarke win this argument. “My problem? Are you serious? You’re forcing me to stay with you, yet you treat me like a red-headed step child.” Lexa throws her arms up, because she really doesn’t know what else to do with them. “I’m trying here, Clarke. I don’t know what you expect from me. I’m trying to be nice and appreciative. Because I am. I am very appreciative for everything that you’ve done for me, but holy shit… you’ve got to let me know what your fucking problem is. One second you’re cold. Another second you’re hot. I don’t know what to do. I don’t know how to act around you.”

“Don’t talk to me like I’m acting all high and mighty, Lexa!” Clarke practically screams and Lexa has to look away and shake her head. “I don’t have a problem. I’m just letting you know that I don’t want anything from you. I don’t want you paying for my things. I need nothing from you. Got that?” Clarke turns back to look out the front windshield and runs her fingers through her long, blonde hair. “We are not friends.   
This whole situation is fucked. I’m a fucking idiot for making you stay.”

“You know what?” Lexa laughs again, because really, she doesn’t know what else to do. “Yeah. Yeah you are a fucking idiot for making me stay. You might as well call the law when we get back to your place. I’ll make off running and you can just tell them that you saw me on the side of the road.” Lexa looks forward now. “Wait. You know what?” She mutters angrily before unbuckling her seat belt. “How about I go right now? Go ahead and call them, Clarke.” She says before jumping out of the car.

Lexa is already a little ways down the road in front of the car before Clarke really registers what just happened. The blonde hurriedly unbuckles her seatbelt too and slams the car door shut and she exits. It’s not long and she’s right on Lexa’s heels. “What the hell are you doing?” Clarke asks. She’s not worried about anyone seeing them. There is never any traffic on this road. “Lexa!” She yells, and all of sudden she feels odd. Clarke feels as if she’s gotten way too comfortable calling this woman by her first name and yelling at her. It feels like she been arguing with Lexa for years. Not two days. She would laugh if she weren’t so pissed off. “Get your ass back here now!”

“Yeah.” Lexa says angrily as she spins around on her heels and Clarke almost runs right over her. “You’d like that wouldn’t you? I could just stay here in this Podunk town and be your little puppet on a string.” Lexa snarls and Clarke’s eyes widen. “I’m not some toy for you to play with because you’re bored, Clarke. I’m a person. A person that’s been through a hell of a lot in my short lifetime, and all that I fucking ask is for a little fucking respect from people. If not respect, then at least some semblance that you see me as human fucking being and not some low life criminal.”

The two women stare at each other, on the side of the road, in the freezing cold temperatures of the late November air in Colorado. If someone were to drive by, they would look almost comical. Lexa hates talking like this to people. Especially someone like Clarke, but she’s through. She’s through being treated like she’s not a person. She’s been nothing but nice and respectful to Clarke for the past two days.

“I’m sorry.” Clarke utters quietly, taking Lexa by complete surprise. She can see a softness return to Clarke’s face. One that she doesn’t think that she’s seen before. She sees tears start to form in Clarke’s blue eyes and it only aids in making them more vibrant than they already are. Clarke doesn’t let the tears fall though, she only speaks again. “I’m so sorry. This – this isn’t me.” Clarke stutters out. If Lexa only knew everything that was running through her mind right now. “I was just – I’m ju – I was being too prideful.” Clarke says. “And scared. If I’m being honest.” She adds. Lexa doesn’t say anything yet and so Clarke continues. “The past few years, I’ve been on my own, besides Finn. I’ve had to do everything that I can to pay bills and keep my son healthy and happy. It’s been a struggle. I’m not going to lie. A real struggle, and I guess when you paid for my food, for some stupid reason it just hit me wrong.” The blonde shrugs and Lexa’s face has already softened. “Like I said. I was too prideful. I don’t need anyone to take care of me. Of us. So, I’m sorry about how I acted, okay?”

“Okay.” Lexa replies quietly. 

“What?” Clarke asks in surprise. “That was too quick. I was a major ass, Lexa.”

Lexa nods her head. “You were, but you had your reasons. I get it… I’m not the most trustworthy of a person. At least that’s what everyone thinks, but I was an asshole too. It’s okay, Clarke.”

“It’s not okay.” Clarke says. “I’m sorry. Please come back home.” Clarke pleads before she realizes what she just said. “I mean – just please come back to my house.”

“Alright.” The brunette answers, surprising Clarke once again, but little does Clarke know, is that Lexa couldn’t leave her right now if she wanted to. She can’t describe it. This feeling. This draw to the blonde, and even to her son. For some reason, she feels like she was meant to run up on the small, white house in the middle of nowhere, Colorado. Just like Clarke was meant to make her stay here. Lexa gestures towards the vehicle and Clarke walks back with Lexa right behind her. 

They drive to Mrs. Caldwell’s house, to pick up Finn, in silence. As soon as the young boy plops down in the back seat, he breaks the silence happily. “Hi, momma.” He grins. “Hi, Lexa.”

“Hey, baby.” Clarke replies.

“What’s up, little dude?” Lexa grins back. 

“Did you have fun with Mrs. Caldwell?” Clarke asks.

“Yes ma’am.” He answers sweetly. “In a couple of weeks, her granddaughter is coming to stay with her for Christmas. She told me that we could have a sleepover. Her name is Niylah and she’s four.”

“That sounds like fun.” Clarke replies. 

“What’s that smell?” Finn asks with wide eyes, like he already knew the answer before he asked the question. 

“Lexa, bought you some chili cheese fries from The Dropship.” Clarke smiles back at her son through the rearview mirror as she drives down the road back to her house. 

“Really?” He asks, excitedly when Lexa turns around in her seat to look at him. “Thanks!”

“No problem.” The brunette smiles. “I thought that maybe, when we get back and after you eat them, maybe you could show me how well you can throw that baseball of yours.”

“Seriously?” He grins, and Clarke doesn’t think that she’s seen her son smile that big in a very long time. Her heart warms at the sight, and the fact that Lexa is being this nice to him after what just happened between the two of them, makes Clarke feel ever worse about the way that she acted. “That will be so much fun!”

“You bet it will.” Lexa replies. “You better go easy on me though.”

“No promises.” He answers, making Clarke and Lexa both laugh.

 

//

 

As soon as they’re back at Clarke’s house, Finn runs into the house and plops down at the kitchen counter to eat his fries. Before Lexa can walk into the house, she feels something grab her wrist and stop her from opening the door. She turns to find Clarke looking at her with questioning eyes. They seem to stare at each other for a while, but in reality it was only a few seconds. Clarke lets go of Lexa’s wrist quickly, like she had just realized that she was holding onto the other woman. 

“I – uh – I just wanted to say thank you.” Clarke starts, earning a puzzling look from the brunette. “For treating Finn so well. Especially after how I acted. I – “

“Clarke…” Lexa interrupts her. “You’ve nothing to apologize for. Everything is forgiven.” She smiles slightly. It’s so weird at how far they’ve come in the past forty-eight hours. “And Finn is awesome. It would be really hard to not treat him well. He’s great.” Lexa says before turning back to open the door. “Just like his mom.” She adds before she walks in, leaving a warm hearted Clarke standing outside in the cold November air.

 

//

 

“Okay, little dude.” Lexa says as she pulls her jacket tighter around herself as she and Finn make their way to the backyard to play catch. Her stomach is still hurting from her wound, but she figures as long as she doesn’t get too crazy with anything, then she’ll be fine. “Ready to show me what you got?” She teases, patting her hand into the extra glove that Finn gave her and squatting down like she’s ready to prep for a ball.

Finn laughs at her for about a minute before walking on past her a little ways and taking his stance. Before he starts to throw, Lexa realizes that Finn has started to look a little shy, or nervous. She can’t really tell. “What’s wrong, bud?” She asks the boy softly.

“I’m not that good.” He answers sadly with a shrug of his shoulders. “I’ve never had anyone really to teach me. Mom tries, but she doesn’t really know anything about baseball.” He sort of grins. “She just tries for me.”

“Sounds like a good mom to me.” Lexa grins. She knows that Clarke’s a great mom, even after only knowing her for two days. “And I bet that you’re just fine at playing baseball, Finn. You’re only five. You have so much time to learn and become even better.”

The boy shrugs again, making Lexa chuckle. It must be a habit of his. He seems to do it fairly often. “Yeah.” He sighs. “I guess that you’re right.”

“You’re damn right I’m right.” Lexa grins before realizing what she said. Shit.

“Swear jar!” He yells before pointing his index finger at the backdoor of the house.

Lexa let’s out a very audible groan; loud enough for Finn to hear it from where he’s standing. “I didn’t mean to.” She whines, making Finn giggle. 

“Doesn’t matter.” He grins, shaking his head and still pointing at the back door. “You have to go pay up.”

“I don’t have any quarters.” Lexa finally says, hoping that that would hold him off for the time being.

“Bills will do.” He laughs when he sees the glare that Lexa throws his way, before she turns around and marches to the back door before they can even starting throwing the baseball. “Big bills!” He yells before she steps inside the house.

Raven and Clarke are sitting in the living room, and Lexa is almost afraid to ask what they’re talking about. Actually, she is afraid, so she is just going to ignore the fact and not say anything. Clarke see’s Lexa come through the back door and start digging in the back pocket of a pair of her new jeans that fit her perfectly. “What are you doing?” She asks the taller brunette, giving her a quizzical look. 

Lexa mutters under her breath, as Clarke sees Lexa pull a five dollar bill out of her wallet and shove it in the swear jar. “What was that?” Clarke wants to chuckle because now she knows. She knows that Finn has gotten his anti-swearing claws dug deep into Lexa. It’s really a relief. He hounds Clarke about it all of the time. Maybe with Lexa and Raven being here, it will take the attention off of her cussing for a while.

“You know damn well what.” Lexa groans before she sticks her tongue out at a laughing Clarke and Raven as she runs back outside.

Once their laughter dies down, Clarke takes another sip of her coffee and gazes out of the backdoor window to watch Lexa show her son how to properly throw a baseball. She doesn’t think that there are words in the English language to explain what she’s feeling, because, to be honest, she has no idea what she’s feeling. Seeing Finn so open and warm and excited with someone other than her or Octavia is really weird for her. He really is a great kid and he deserves the world. She just wishes that she could give that to him.

“I swear.” Raven laughs, breaking the small moment of silence that seemed to have overtaken them in the warm of Clarke’s living room. It was still weird having people here other than herself and Finn, much less people that she knew nothing about. Complete strangers. “Only after a day of knowing that kid and she’s already whipped.” The brunette grins, pointing her thumb out the window towards Lexa and Clarke’s son.

Her words cause Clarke to chuckle into her warm mug. She doesn’t really know what’s gotten into her over the past few hours. She never lets herself smile or laugh this much. She doesn’t know why, it’s just not her thing. Not anymore anyways. “He seems to have that effect on people.” Clarke explains.

Clarke hears Raven hum from across the room. “He must get that from his mother.” She says without any hesitation and Clarke’s not really sure on how to take it. What does that even mean?

“What?

“Finn’s not the only one that has Woods whipped.” Raven replies bluntly, before she takes a long sip of her coffee and eyes the blonde across the rim of her mug.

Clarke rolled her blue eyes at Raven’s insinuation. “What are you talking about? You’re crazy.”

“Look,” Raven says, leaning forward in her seat and setting her mug on the table in front of them. “I know Lexa Woods better than anyone else alive.” Raven chuckles a bit at something that she’s thought up in her head, and Clarke wonders what the other woman is thinking. Clarke tries to pretend that she’s not interested in this conversation whatsoever, so she stands up and walks to the back door to lean on the wall and look out the window there. “I have never seen her so…” Raven looks as if she’s searching the room for her words. “Complacent.” The brunette looks like she’s thinking deeply again. “I’m not sure if that’s the word that I’m looking for, but… she’s just – different. The Lexa Woods that I used to know wouldn’t be taking any of your shit.”

Clarke snapped her blue eyes over to Raven before the brunette throws her hands in the air. “No offense!” Raven chuckles. “I’m just saying that she never listened to anyone, except for her parents. She was running buck wild all of the time, it seemed like. She didn’t give a damn about what anyone thought of her.”

“Are you trying to make a point?” Clarke asks, her warm breath fogging up the cold window in front of her. She chuckles to herself as she sees Lexa lay out for a crazy pitch that Finn threw.

“My point is, Miss Griffin, that you should watch yourself.” This catches Clarke’s attention for sure. Watch herself for what? “Woods is my best friend. She’s like my sister, but don’t go falling in love with her or anything. She won’t hang around long.” Raven shrugs her shoulders and Clarke practically spits out her coffee at the ‘don’t go falling in love’ statement. “It’s not her style.”

“I’m not sure what you think is going on between me and your friend, Miss Reyes, but there is absolutely nothing going on there.” Clarke replies with a little bit of bite. She turns her eyes back to the window to where Finn must have just done something awesome because Lexa is running towards him while his hands are in the air, and the brunette takes him in her arms and runs around in circles yelling. The smile on Finn’s face is one in a million, and Clarke’s heart melts. “We’re not even friends.” She adds, and it’s almost as if she’s trying to convince herself of that and not Raven.

 

//

 

“Hey, you two!” Clarke yells out the backdoor, just as the sun is setting in the distance. The temperature has dropped even more and she prays that Finn doesn’t get sick from running around in this weather. “Come wash up. It’s time for dinner.”

Lexa and Finn break into an all out sprint. Clarke realizes that they’re racing. She smiles to herself, but deep inside her stomach rolls a little at the thought of Finn getting close to Lexa. Sure, Lexa seems like a good person. A great person, actually, but she can’t forget why the brunette is here. She can’t forget about what the brunette has done. Or possibly done. Clarke doesn’t know. Her brain is swimming, and it’s like she doesn’t know what’s up or down right now.

While Lexa and Finn are in the bathroom washing their hands for dinner, Finn grins at the mirror at his new friend. “Thanks for playing with me today, Lexa. It was so much fun!”

“No problem, little man.” Lexa smiles widely as she towel dries her hands and passes the towel to Finn. “I had fun too. You’re going to be an awesome baseball player when you grow up.” She winks and the boy’s smile grows even more. Finn turns to walk out of the bathroom, but then Lexa stops him before he can go. “Hey Finn, you think that you could do something for me?”

“Sure.” He smiles. “What is it?”

“I bought your mom a present today. I was wondering if you could sneak it into her room for me real quick while she’s in the kitchen.”

He looks a little bit confused before he speaks. “It’s not her birthday, is it?”

“No.” Lexa answers. At least she doesn’t think that it is. She honestly doesn’t know. “It’s just – uh – a gift thanking her for being a great friend and letting me stay with you guys.”

“Okay.” He grins.

“Okay.” Lexa replies. “Stay here. Let me run and get it from under the couch.” It’s only a few seconds later when Lexa comes back into the bathroom and hands a rectangular shaped box to Finn. “Can you maybe just go set it on her nightstand or something?”

“Yep.” He grins, popping the ‘p’.

“Okay.” Lexa smiles again. This kid keeps making her do that and it feels so weird. Weird. But good. “Thanks, little dude. I’ll be in the kitchen.”

 

//

 

After dinner, Lexa cleans all of the dirty dishes while Clarke gets Finn ready for bed. Raven stays in the kitchen with Lexa to keep her company. They haven’t gotten to speak much since Raven’s arrival. It’s weird being in this place with people that they don’t know. Not really anyways. Lexa has felt a small shift in the tide that is hers and Clarke’s – relationship. If you can even call it that. They’re really only acquaintances. Something’s different though. Clarke had caught her one too many times during supper staring across the table at her. Lexa would immediately put her head back down and look at her plate like nothing had ever happened. Finn kept the conversation going throughout the meal. Speaking of baseball and dinosaurs and how much he likes the macaroni and cheese that his mom makes. Lexa most definitely had to agree with the mac and cheese statement.

“Here.” Raven says, breaking Lexa out of her thoughts when she finishes putting up the dishes. Lexa turns around and sees a small black box looking thing that looks like a mobile phone lying on the counter. Raven had clearly just laid it there.

“What’s this?” Lexa asks, picking it up and turning it in her hand. They both hear a chuckle coming from the doorway of the hall that meets the kitchen. Raven chuckles a little too when she sees Clarke. “What?” Lexa asks. Clearly they were laughing at her.

“It’s an iPhone, Woods.” Raven says like it’s the most obvious thing in the world.

“Is that supposed to mean anything to me?” Lexa laughs too. 

“Here.” Clarke says, holding out her hand as she walks closer to Lexa and leans on the counter top. “I’ll give you a quick tutorial.” The blonde is grinning and Lexa knows that it’s because she is so oblivious to all of this new technology and clothing and stuff. Ten years. Things have come a long way in the past ten years. She feels like some elderly woman who needs help with something from her grandkids. 

To be honest, Lexa doesn’t care that Clarke is giggling at her. She’s just glad to see the blonde giggling at anything. Raven notices how the two lean a little closer to each other as Lexa watches all of the steps that Clarke takes as she goes through the details of this iPhone. She takes this as her cue to leave. She fakes a yawn and stretches her arms above her head. “Well, you guys… it’s been real, but I’m going to hit the hay.” Neither one of them looks up from the phone. 

“Night, Ray.” Lexa says softly.

“Don’t forget, Woods. No one else’s number besides mine and the ones that are programmed in there. It’s mine, Lincoln, and Nyko’s numbers, but you should get my say so before contacting them. Got it?”

“Got it, boss.” Lexa says, rolling her eyes. Raven is treating her like a fucking child. 

Before Raven walks down the stairs to the basement, she yells, “You can add blondie’s too!”

This makes Lexa blush and she really hopes that Clarke isn’t looking at her to see it. This is the closest that she’s been to Clarke, other than when Clarke grabbed her wrist earlier this evening. Lexa can smell the other woman’s perfume and it’s the most intoxicating thing that she’s ever smelled. She’s sure of it. And the blonde’s shampoo is just as powerful. Lexa wishes that Clarke would move just a couple of inches more so that their arms would brush against each other. She wants to feel Clarke. Feel her skin on her own. She just wants the contact. She needs the contact, and it’s not really something that she’s thought of that much until this very moment.

She honestly doesn’t know what she’s thinking. More than likely, Clarke isn’t even into girls. And a lot more than likely, she most definitely not into escaped inmates. Clarke is too good for Lexa. She knows this, but she can’t help but dream. Dream of a better time when she would have met Clarke just out and about in the world, along with Finn. Maybe then something could happen between them, but not now. Not in this reality.

Lexa pretty much blanks out for the majority of Clarke’s iPhone tutorial. She’s too busy taking in all of the gorgeous woman’s features up close and personal. She wants to take this all in and remember it.   
Hopefully, tonight, she’ll dream about it.

She hears the blonde yawn beside her. “Go to bed, Clarke. You’ve had a long day.” Lexa grins. “I’ll try to figure this thing out.”

Clarke only nods. She starts to walk off but then thinks of something else. “I’ll be leaving in the morning for work. I’m taking Finn to Mrs. Caldwell’s for the day. You and Raven will have the day to work on whatever it is that you’re doing.”

“Leave him here.” Lexa blurts out. Not thinking of really anything else. There was really no sense of Finn having to leave with she and Raven there. She was more than capable of watching the little guy, but she knew what Clarke would think of that. “I can watch him. Raven won’t let me help her anyways.”

“No.” Clarke replies firmly, and it would have hurt Lexa’s feelings if she hadn’t already been expecting it.

“Clarke…” She halfway expects the blonde to interrupt her but she doesn’t so she continues. “You can trust me with Finn. I will watch him with my life. We can just hang out, play baseball, work on that puzzle that he’s been needing help with. It will be fine. I promise.”

“I don’t know.” Clarke says again, and it’s better than what Lexa was waiting for. “I don’t know if I trust – “ 

“Look, Clarke…” Lexa knows what she was going to say and she has to admit that it definitely hurts. “I know that you don’t trust me, but let this be a test of sorts. Nothing will happen to him. If something ever did, I don’t know what I would do with myself. Please.”

Moments go by. Intense moments of silence. Clarke’s sapphire eyes bore into Lexa’s green ones, and Lexa would be lying if she said that Clarke didn’t scare her just a little bit. “Okay.” The blonde finally gives in and Lexa can’t fucking believe it. Success! “But if you fuck this up – “

“I won’t!” Lexa grins. “I won’t fuck this up, Clarke. Thank you.”

Clarke nods before turning and walking down the hallway to her room. Before she’s completely in, she hears Lexa from the living room. “Goodnight, Clarke.” It’s dark in the hallway and far enough away that Clarke smiles a little because she knows that Lexa can’t see her. She doesn’t respond, just walks into her room for the night. Tonight though, Lexa doesn’t here the lock click.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> What did you think? Let me know in the comments below... also, I love kudos. ;) Love you guys!
> 
> Follow me on Twitter @asuzh90


	4. Hope is a Very Prevailing Thing

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> What's up, everyone? I just wanted to quickly say that I am so thankful for all of you and the wonderful comments that I have been getting. You guys are amazing and I appreciate each of you. 
> 
> I hope that you enjoy the new update. Hope fully I will have another done Friday or Saturday, depending on my work schedule. 
> 
> P.S. I've had a couple of people tell me how much they loved his AU or this prompt, and they wondered how I came up with it. Truthfully, I'm usually at work, listening to my iPod and a certain song gets my brain to imagining different scenarios, and I start to think, 'Hmm... that could work for a fic.' I usually either take a voice memo or a note in my phone so that I don't forget it. The song that I happened to be listening to when I thought of this fic, is "You Save Me" by Kenney Chesney. Go listen if you don't know it. I love it. :)

When Clarke enters her bedroom, after stupidly agreeing to let Lexa and Raven watch Finn the next day, her breath is coming in quick and choppy. She leans her back up against the door and slowly tries to get her breathing regulated enough that she can think clearly. She can’t believe that she did that. She can’t believe that she actually let Lexa talk her into that. This was so unlike Clarke. It was almost scary, but tonight when she looked into those damned, magnetizing, green eyes, and Lexa starting pleading with her to give her a chance, Clarke knew that she was a goner. 

There is no way in hell that any sane person would let their kid stay with someone that they only met two days ago. Much less a person that the entire government of the United States of America is looking for. 

That’s got to be it, though. Clarke should be declared legally insane. That’s the only explanation.

After Clarke gets her breathing and her thoughts somewhat under control, she makes her way to the bathroom that’s attached to her bedroom. She throws a headband on in order to keep her hair from falling in her face. While she is waiting for the water from the sink faucet to become hot, she looks at herself in the mirror and sighs. She’s such a mess. Seeing someone as gorgeous as   
Lexa, and even Raven… it just makes her feel so frumpy. 

Clarke can’t remember the last time that she wore more than the basic amount of make-up, or even the last time that she wore a dress. It’s not like she really cares though. She hasn’t been in the market to meet anyone new. Not in a long time. Not since Finn and her dad. Just the thought of being with someone emotionally and physically, other than Finn, makes her a nervous wreck. She doesn’t think that she could ever handle that again. She can’t put herself, and little Finn, in the position for more heartbreak. There’s been too much of that already.

She washes her face with hot water, reveling in the burning sensation. She scrubs, probably harder than necessary, but it’s only to try and make herself feel something. She’s so damn weirded out, because for the first time in a long time, she’s felt something other than her usual kempt down emotions. 

She knows what brought them on, but she won’t admit it to herself. She can’t.

Once Clarke is done in the bathroom, she makes her way back into her bedroom and over to her wardrobe where she strips off the day’s clothes and pulls on a large t-shirt and sweatpants to sleep in. She doesn’t know why, but it’s been an awfully emotionally taxing day. She feels as if her nerves are shot and her body is pleading with her to get some rest. Especially since she has to return to work tomorrow. She’s just glad that she works a basic eight to four shift, rather than some odd time. 

As soon as she tucks herself into her queen-sized bed, she turns over on her side to turn off the lamp and lay her cell phone on the nightstand beside her. Before she turns the lamp off though, she notices something that wasn’t there before. It’s a rectangular shaped box, and she starts to wonder where in the hell this came from.

She sits up in bed, resting her back against the headboard, and reaches over to grab the foreign box. It’s fairly light, but the box itself is very nice, with small gold details in the stitching. Overcome with curiosity, she finally opens it and is met with a beautifully simple silver necklace. The chain itself is thin, and looks as if it could break at any moment, and the charm that is set in the center of it is a small star outlined in tiny diamonds. She immediately recognizes it. She had seen it in the store that she and Lexa were in earlier. It instantly had caught her eye as she walked past it to move out the door.

Clarke runs her index finger over the small star, and doesn’t realize that she’s sporting a small grin. When she goes to lay it back in the box, she notices a piece of paper folded up several times in order for it to fit inside the jewelry box. She removes it, but before she opens it, she takes a deep breath. She’s scared to see what it says, because she knows who it’s from.

She reads the note slowly, in order to take in everything and remember that she’s already jumped Lexa’s case once about doing things for her. It reads:

 

‘Clarke, I know that you’re probably mildly angry with me at the moment for even considering buying this for you, but, please, hear me out. In the past forty-eight hours, you’ve saved my life, given me a temporary home, and did something that no one else has ever done for me… You’ve given me hope. Somehow, against all odds, against all logic, you restored my hope in one fail swoop. It may not have been your intention to show me such a thing, but you did and even just a single thread of hope is still a very prevailing thing. Most people would do well to learn from you. I thank you for your hospitality and for your spectacular kid. I mean, really, he’s awesome, and I find myself smiling around the both of you often, and that’s something that I haven’t done in a very long time. I feel bad for writing this, and not just telling you face to face, but I wasn’t sure if you’d listen to me. If you would like, I can tell you everything. About what happened. It might change your mind about me. I have hope. You’d be the fourth person that I’ve told. It’s scary, but… here we are. Everyone has a chapter that they don’t read out loud, but I will read mine for you. I owe you that much.’ - Lexa

 

Clarke must read the handwritten note a least half a dozen more times, running her finger over the intricate style of Lexa’s handwriting. It’s beautiful, yet simple. The brunette’s penmanship is exquisite. Just as her words are. Clarke raises a hand to her face to wipe away a single tear that she didn’t realize had fallen from her eye. She honestly doesn’t know why she even started to shed tears. Maybe it’s because she realized, even in just this simple letter, how genuine Lexa has been. Clarke knows people.   
She is good at reading them, and this… this is sincere. She doesn’t have to see Lexa to know that she means everything that she has written here. And the brunette is right; Clarke, more than likely, wouldn’t have listened to her. She would have probably just told Lexa to stop. It would have been the easier thing to do.

She sits there, in the warm lighting of her bedroom, thinking about everything. So much has happened in the past two days, that she’s not even sure if this is even real life right now. She feels as if she were dropped into some damn movie, and she expects to be kidnapped at any time now.

Clarke doesn’t know what to do now. It’s very clear that she can’t just ignore the necklace and the letter altogether. She will have to say something to the brunette about it eventually, but what in the hell would she say? ‘Thanks’? That doesn’t seem right. No. Not at all.

Her hands are sweating and she doesn’t know why in the hell she’s so damn nervous. It’s a gift. A simple gift from someone who is trying to thank her for her hospitality. Okay. It’s an expensive gift. Clarke had seen the price tag on the necklace earlier today, but… semantics.

Finally, Clarke realizes what she can do without it being completely awkward to speak to the brunette face-to-face. She remembered quickly adding her cell number into Lexa’s new iPhone earlier and sending herself a text so that she would have Lexa’s number. Only for the fact that Finn is staying with her tomorrow. That’s the only reason that she put her number in that phone. The only reason.

She’s just going to be all high school about this and text her. That would be fine, right? Surely Lexa at least knows how to text.   
Not that Clarke really expects anything back from the other woman, but still… maybe she can at least open the damned message to read it, because it would completely ruin the whole point if Clarke has to go out there to show Lexa how to read a text message.

Clarke takes a deep breath. She, honestly, has no idea why she’s so anxious. She shakes her hands out, to rid herself of her nerves. (As if that would help anything.)

CLARKE (11:57PM) – You’re right, you know?

The blonde waits for what feels like an eternity. She actually starts to think that Lexa has already fallen asleep, until she sees the three familiar dots pop up in the left hand corner of the screen of her phone. That bleep and roll for ages it seems, and she chuckles to herself knowing that more than likely, Lexa is still just trying to figure the damned thing out.

LEXA (12:06AM) – What am I right about, Clarke?

Even through a text message, Clarke gets a tingle in her spine at Lexa saying her name. She can hear the brunette rolling the ‘a’ and the ‘r’ of her tongue so easily, and clicking the ‘k’ at the end as if she does it one purpose. Clarke has never heard her name sound better than when it does coming out of Lexa’s mouth. And that’s probably a totally creepy thing to say, but it’s the truth.

CLARKE (12:09AM) – I probably wouldn’t have listened to you.

LEXA (12:12AM) – So you actually read my letter? I figured as soon as you realized who it was from, you’d toss it.

Clarke can’t hold back the grin that starts to form on her face, because she can hear Lexa’s sarcastic tone all the way in her room.

CLARKE (12:14AM) – I contemplated it.

CLARKE (12:14AM) – But even I’m not that big of an asshole.

LEXA (12:18AM) – You’re not an asshole at all, Clarke. You’re you, and that’s all that matters.

What the hell does that even mean? That’s what Clarke really wants to send back, but she refrains herself.

CLARKE (12:20AM) – I just wanted to say ‘thank you’.

CLARKE (12:20AM) – For the necklace.

CLARKE (12:21AM) – And for the note. It helped give me a bit of insight from your perspective.

LEXA (12:23AM) – You’re more than welcome, Miss Griffin.

LEXA (12:24AM) – I meant every word.

CLARKE (12:25AM) – I think that I might want to take you up on your offer.

The blonde takes a deep breath, knowing that she can’t take this back now. Not even if she wanted to.

LEXA (12:27AM) – Oh? And what was my offer?

CLARKE (12:29AM) – I want to hear your chapter.

This time, it takes Lexa a bit longer to text back. Clarke wonders if the other woman has changed her mind about filling Clarke in on a few issues. She may have decided that it was too personal to share with her.

LEXA (12:37AM) – That can most certainly be arranged. 

LEXA (12:38AM) – I look forward to it.

LEXA (12:39AM) – Go to sleep, Clarke. You have work.

CLARKE (12:39AM) – Yes, mother.

 

//

 

The next morning, after Clarke had gotten up around six to take a shower and get ready for another workday at the clinic, she made to leave her room. She had planned to sneak into Finn’s room to give him a small peck on the cheek before she left, but when she opened his door, he wasn’t in there. Of course he was already up. That kid.

She closed Finn’s bedroom door and made her way to the living room and kitchen area where she started to smell something. The blonde popped her head around the corner to look. She didn’t want to wake Lexa, but then she saw the brunette in the kitchen, standing over the stove. Finn was sitting at the counter behind her, rambling about some bones that some archaeologists had just dug up, thinking that it was some new species of dinosaur.

Finn caught sight of his mother before she could fully make her way into the kitchen. “Morning, mom.” He grins from ear to ear and then sticks a piece of toast in his mouth. Lexa spins around with a skillet and a spatula in her hands, and look of surprise on her face. It quickly fell into one of, almost fear, Clarke realized. She felt bad that Lexa felt as if she had to walk on eggshells around her. Which, in all honesty, maybe Lexa did.

“Clarke, hey – uh – good morning.” Lexa stuttered around, setting the skillet into the sink along with the spatula. “I was just – uh – “ Clarke had to admit how adorable Lexa looked when she got all nervous and flustered like this. It did make Clarke feel bad, however, that Lexa still felt that way around her. But, of course, she did. Clarke’s been awful to her, and she can’t deny that she is still not over everything, but she’s going to try. That’s the least that she could do.

“Smells good.” Clarke says, interrupting Lexa’s babbling. It really did smell good, and she was relieved that she didn’t have to worry about cooking breakfast now. Clarke walked over to stand by Finn and place a kiss to the top of his head. “How long have you been up?”

“Only a few minutes.” Finn answers. “I smelled food, so I came running.” He grinned, causing Lexa to chuckle before handing Clarke a plate of food.

“Thank you.” The blonde utters, giving Lexa a shy smile while accepting her plate and sitting down beside Finn.

Lexa gave her a small nod. “I’m sorry if it’s not that great.” Lexa declares with a bit of a frown. “It’s been a while since I’ve cooked anything.”

Clarke nods back to her in understanding before she started to dig into her breakfast. Her plate consisted of eggs, toast, hashbrowns, and a slice of bacon. The plate looked fantastic, and Clarke started to wonder about how long Lexa had been up cooking. “I didn’t know what the two of you liked to eat, so I made a little bit of everything, but if you don’t like any of that, perhaps I can make some – “

The blonde chuckles at Lexa, interrupting her rambling in the process. “This is all great, Lexa.” Clarke gives her another small smile, and Lexa feels as if she might fall over from that smile alone. “Finn and I aren’t picky, are we buddy?” She says, looking sideways to her son, who shook his head ‘no’. Lexa leans up against the opposite counter, so that she’s facing Finn and Clarke as they eat. She digs into her own plate slowly and carefully, watching the expressions on her two housemates’ faces. Finn was shoveling everything in like he hadn’t eaten in a week, and Lexa grins big at him. It’s the soft, low moan that comes from next to him, though, that makes her knees almost give out. Clarke must have really been enjoying the food. Lexa can only stand there staring at her, hoping and praying that the blonde didn’t look up, because she wasn’t sure if she would be able to pull her eyes away right now. 

Clarke was looking adorable in a pair of light blue scrubs. Apparently, even the receptionist had to wear the uniform as well. She saw the name ‘Clarke’ embroidered into the left breast pocket in black. Her blonde hair was down and flowing gently over her shoulders in big, loose curls. She was striking, even in something so simple. Lexa had to make herself look away, because she was suddenly feeling like a serious creeper.

“This is all really good.” Clarke says, after a few minutes of silence, pointing down towards her plate with her fork. “Thank you again for cooking.” Lexa nods once again, and Clarke wonders why Lexa has been so quiet. Clarke has only known her for a few days, but she already knows that that is not like Lexa. Clarke breaks her gaze from the brunette across from her and lays her fork down on her empty plate. Lexa makes quick work of grabbing it and putting it into the sink to begin washing. Clarke doesn’t argue because she knows that it would be pointless. “You ready to spend the day with Lexa, bud?” Clarke asks her son, looking down to him as he finishes his last bite of eggs. His eyes widen and he grins really big.

“I’m not going to Mrs. Caldwell’s? I get to stay here with Lexa?” He was excited, Clarke could tell, and all of a sudden, she didn’t feel as bad for leaving him.

Clarke looks over to Lexa, who is finishing cleaning the dishes in the sink. She catches gaze of green eyes, and it almost makes her forget what she was going to say. She doesn’t know why Lexa and her damned eyes have this effect on her so. “You didn’t tell him?” Clarke asks, finding it strange that Lexa hadn’t mentioned to Finn this morning.

Lexa shook her head ‘no’ before answering verbally. “I thought that you might have changed your mind.” She said quietly, with a twinge of sadness. Lexa really hadn’t expected Clarke to still be moving forward with the idea of Lexa babysitting today. Or any day for that matter.

Clarke’s face fell, and there is a few moments of silence as she stares across into green. “Finn, can you give us a minute, please?”

“Yes ma’am.” He answers, jumping off of the bar stool and heading to his bedroom. 

Clarke stands from her seat as well, but makes her way over to the brunette on the other side of the island. She gets a lot closer than Lexa was expecting her to, and she backs up into the counter behind her, holding on tightly to the edge. Clarke’s face is searching her own. The blonde seems to be trying to find her own words. She knows how careful that she, herself, has to be with her own word choices. She’s sure that Clarke does the same. “I’m sorry.” Clarke finally says, and Lexa furrows her brow in confusion.

“Clarke, what are – “

“I’m sorry that I gave you that impression. The one that says I’m a bitch and doesn’t care about anyone’s feelings. The one that doesn’t trust anyone.” The blonde says, shaking her head and looking down at her feet. “And that may be me… I don’t know. It hasn’t always been though. I haven’t always been like this.”

“Why are you – “

“I used to be fun and carefree and excited about life and all of – “

Clarke stops immediately when she feels hands grip her shoulders, and she looks back up to green, but she must be giving a God-awful look, because Lexa almost instantaneously lets go, removing her hand like she was burned. “Stop.” Lexa says. “You have to stop. Stop apologizing to me, Clarke. If you would have changed your mind about letting Finn stay with me, I wouldn’t have thought much about it. You’re a mother and your priority is your son and his safety. I understand that if you don’t trust me.”

“He can stay.” Clarke finally says, after a few seconds of silence. She doesn’t say that she trusts Lexa, because she doesn’t and she doesn’t want to give the brunette that false hope. Clarke does, however, know that Finn will be in good hands with her. She’s seen the way that Lexa acts around Finn. It’s like they’ve known each other for way longer than three days, and the feeling that her son is getting so close to the other woman, makes Clarke more than a little nervous.

“I have to go now.” Clarke says, stepping a few steps backwards, away from the brunette. “Thank you again for this.” She says again, gesturing around the kitchen. Lexa doesn’t say anything, so Clarke walks off to find Finn to tell him ‘goodbye’ before returning to the living room to throw on her jacket. “I’ll be calling every hour on the hour.” Clarke says firmly. “Make sure to answer, or I’ll assume the worst.”

“Of course.” Lexa agrees. “Is there anything I should know? Does he have any like – allergies or anything that I should know about?”

“No. He’s perfectly healthy.” Clarke answers as she slings the front door open. “Take care of my son, Lexa.”

“Always.” Lexa replies strongly before Clarke leaves. Lexa doesn’t miss the small, silver star necklace that was hanging from the blonde’s neck as she left. She smiles to herself.

On the other side of the door, outside in the freezing cold air, Clarke is leaning up against her car, taking a deep breath and focusing. Those green eyes were going to be the death of her and she hated herself for feeling like this. This wasn’t her. She wasn’t this weak. Ever. She would most definitely have to try and distance herself a little more from Lexa. She’s been doing a horrible job of that.

 

//

 

As soon as Clarke gets to work, she realizes that, once again, it’s going to be an awfully slow day. Not much going on in the tiny town of Silverton, even in sickness. The clinic that she works for is small, to say the least. She’s really not even sure as to why they need a receptionist, but she’s not going to bring that up until they realize it themselves. Two nurses and one doctor work there, with the nurses alternating days of work. 

Thankfully, Niylah, one of the nurses, is off today. It’s not that Clarke doesn’t like her, but the other blonde clearly has a crush on Clarke and it usually makes for an awkward work day. She wasn’t sure that she could deal with that after the morning she had just had. Well, not just the morning, but the last few days.

The past several hours of work have gone by slow and uneventful. Clarke stays true to her word of calling Lexa, every hour on the hour to check on Finn. So far, so good, it seems, and during the other parts of the day, the blonde has plenty of time to think.   
She’s come up with something that she really needs right now, and she hopes that her idea works.

As she sits at the front desk of the clinic, she takes out her cell phone and dials her best friend’s number. “Go for, O.” The voice on the other end of the line says, as she answers the phone.

“Seriously?” Clarke chuckles. “That’s how you’re answering the phone now?”

Her friend laughs with her before assuring her, “Hey. It’s simple and to the point.”

“So is ‘hello’.” Clarke retorts.

“Shut it, Griff. To what do I owe the pleasure of this call?”

“I’ve just been thinking, the past couple of days…” The blonde starts, and she really doesn’t know where to go with this. She knows that it’s a lot to ask of her friend, but she really has no one else to call. No one else that she trusts with this. “Are you still planning on coming to stay with Finn and I for Christmas?”

Octavia doesn’t answer her at first because she is too busy yelling at one of her employees in the background. Clarke laughs, because even though Octavia is small, she’s fierce and she knows how her employees fear her. “Sorry about that, Clarkey.”   
Octavia utters, coming back on the line. “What were you saying? Oh – yeah – of course I’m coming to stay with you guys! You’re my family, and it’s been a few months since the last time we saw each other.”

“Good.” Clarke replies while letting out a breath that she didn’t realize that she had been holding. “Good. We miss you. I know that Finn does for sure. He asks about you constantly.” Clarke giggles and so does Octavia. 

“I miss you both. How’s the little guy doing? He at the babysitter’s?”

“Oh – uh he’s doing just fine.” The blonde clears her throat. “And yes, he’s with the babysitter.” Clarke hated not being completely honest with her friend, but she has to talk to Octavia about this face to face. Not on the phone. Plus, she’s not entirely sure that someone wouldn’t be listening in. You never seem to know these days.

“Good. Clarke?”

“Mhmm?”

“Spit it out.” Octavia says bluntly, causing Clarke to laugh. “I know that something’s wrong. So tell me, please.”

“I was just wanting to know if there was any way that you could come down for an extra week or so? Earlier, if possible. I know that it’s a lot to ask, but I really, really need you here with me right now.” 

“Clarke, what is it? Is something wrong?” The worry in her best friend’s voice is very evident, and she’s glad to know that there’s at least one person out there that cares for her and her son. 

“Nothing. I’m fine, O. Really… it’s just – I just – I need you here.” Clarke let’s out a long sigh. “I can’t talk about it over the phone.”

“Okay.”

“Okay? That’s it?”

“Well, of course.” Octavia chuckles. “Anything for you. I own my own restauraunt, so I can do whatever I want about my own schedule. Indra can watch the place while I’m gone. I can be there in -“ There’s a pause as if Octavia is looking at something. “I can actually be there in like three days.”

“What? Really?” Clarke is so damn happy and excited, she’s beside herself. “Are you sure?”

“Yep.” Octavia answers assuredly. “Just make sure that you’re there to pick me up at the airport when I land. I hate waiting around there. There’s so many creepy ass people.”

Clarke laughs out loud. Octavia was definitely right about that. “I’ll be there. Thank you so much, O. You don’t know how much this means to me.”

“Shut it, Clarke. I love you. Of course I would come. I wish that I could be there sooner.” 

“Three days is soon, Octavia. I’ll be there to pick you up. Just text me the time.”

“Ten-four, Griff. Love you.”

“Love you too.”

Thanks God. The drive to the nearest airport, in Durango, is almost an hour and a half away. That will give Clarke plenty of time to discuss everything with her best friend before they make it back to the house where two new people will be waiting. She’s almost scared to tell Octavia what she’s done. It’s stupid. It is, and she knows it, but she also hopes that Octavia understands her thinking behind it. It will definitely help to have another set of eyes and ears there, just in case something funny is going down that she needs to know about. She can’t wait for her best friend to get her.

 

//

 

“And you’re positive that she likes this?” Lexa asks, with her new smartphone in her hand, flipping through recipes on Pinterest. She doesn’t know how, but Finn knows more about this stuff than she does, so he’s been able to help her a lot. She had asked Finn what Clarke’s favorite food was and he informed her that any kind of salmon recipe would work. He told Lexa that he didn’t eat it, so Clarke never made it, but it was her favorite food. Lexa promised that if she made salmon, that she would make him something that he would eat too.

“Yes, Lexa.” He let’s out a very audible sigh, like he is so over Lexa and her damned questions about his mom. Lexa cuts her eyes over to him, teasingly, at his tone. “She’ll love any salmon. Why are you doing this?”

“What?” The brunette asks the boy, raising her head up from where she was gazing at her cell phone. 

“Why are you doing all this for my mom?” He asks and then raises his eyebrows, making him look even more adorable. “Are you in the doghouse?”

Lexa is sure that if she would have been drinking something just then, she would have spit it out all over the place. “What? No! I’m not in the doghouse.” She chuckles. “How do you even know what that means?”

He shrugs. “I watch TV, Lexa.” Finn answers like it’s the most obvious thing in the entire world. “I just thought that it was just for married people, but I guess friends can be in the doghouse too.”

“No.” Lexa giggles again, shaking her head at this kid. He was too fucking funny. “I’m not in the doghouse with your mom.   
Now, will you please go get Raven and tell her to get up here?” Finn doesn’t say a word. He only gets up and makes his way down into the basement. Raven has been down there pretty much ever since she arrived. She thinks that her friend should take a break, and she can’t forget to ask how things are going later this evening.

After several minutes, Finn returns with Raven in hand. Literally. He is literally dragging her up the stairs and she looks exasperated. Lexa laughs out loud and Raven rolls her eyes. Lexa is glad that Finn hasn’t really asked very many questions about what Raven is doing in the basement with all of that equipment. Lexa think that he just assumes her job has a lot to do with it, and she’s only here to see Lexa. “I need you to run to the grocery store for me, please.” Lexa says once her friend is standing in front of her.

“What? I’m not your damn maid, Woods.” Raven replies with a roll of her eyes.

“Swear jar!” Finn yells, causing Lexa to burst into laughter because she was waiting for that. She’s definitely toned down her cussing around the young boy. Without saying anything, Raven reached into her pocket and pulls out a quarter before handing to Finn. She must be getting used to it too.

“Please, Ray?” Lexa asks again, once the swear jar madness is out of the way. “I had Finn make a list of stuff that his mom usually buys for them at the grocery store, plus some things for a dinner that I’m making tonight.”

“Lexa’s in the doghouse.” Finn says immediately, looking up at Raven who in turn raises her eyebrows and looks at Lexa before laughing. 

“Finn, I’m not in the doghouse.”

“Oh.” Raven chuckles. “This is too good. Even the kid can see how whipped you are.”

“Whipped?” Finn asks with his head popping back up.

“Raven!”

“What? It’s the truth.” The shorter woman grins.

Lexa lets out a sigh before imitating pulling her hair out, causing Finn to laugh again. “Please, will you just go? I just want to do something nice for Clarke after everything that she’s done. She’ll be tired when she get’s home and I just want to – “

“Yes.” Raven interrupts. “God. Just shut up. But it’s so obvious as to how thirsty you are for her.”

“Thirsty?” This comes from Finn, who is way too enthralled with this conversation.

“Finn, will you please go outside and get the mitts and stuff ready? I’ll be there in a second, and we will start throwing.” Lexa says, clearly trying to get the kid out of the room for a second. He absolutely did not need to be around Raven right now. Finn obliges her and runs outside, but not before Lexa yells at him to put on a jacket.

“Here’s the list.” Lexa says, handing over the paper to her friend. If you see anything else that you think that they might like, get that too. Oh – and uh – get a couple of bottles of wine or something. Good stuff. And maybe something for dessert. I’m not sure if I will have time to do dessert too, but Clarke and Finn might like something for – “

“Lexa!”

“What?”

“Shut the hell up and stop being so fucking obvious.”

“Obvious about what?” Lexa asks, but before she can let Raven answer, she speaks again. “And if you say that I’m thirsty for Clarke, then I will slap you so hard right now that you’ll be wishing that I were still in prison.” Raven burst into laughter, and Lexa tried to hide the grin forming on her face. She really wasn’t meaning to come across like she had a thing for Clarke, because she most certainly does not. Lexa just wants to do something nice for Clarke, and continue to do nice things for Clarke and Finn too.   
She doesn’t know why, she just has this need to prove to Clarke that she is a decent, trustworthy person. There’s nothing that Lexa wants more than for the blonde to tell her that she trusts her. ‘Someday.’ Lexa thinks to herself.

“Okay.” Raven chuckles, throwing her hands up in defeat. “I’ll shut up about it, but if you don’t want blondie knowing about your massive lady boner for her, then I suggest that you tone it down a bit.” That’s all that Raven says before yanking the list from Lexa’s long fingers, grabbing her jacket, and making her way out the door.

“I don’t have a lady boner.” Lexa says out loud to herself, before making her way outside to play catch with Finn.

They play for a few minutes without much talking. Every once in a while, Finn will start in about something that’s caught his interest recently, like a new baseball player or a new movie coming out soon, but Lexa is lost in her own thoughts, thinking about everything that Raven said to her earlier. Lexa hadn’t even realized that she was being so Clarke-centric. She’s glad that her friend brought it up to her before she made an absolute fool of herself in front of her blonde-haired savior. 

It’s been so long since Lexa has been with anyone, and her mind must have just gotten away with her. Clarke is beautiful, there’s no denying that. She’s actually probably the most beautiful woman that Lexa has ever had the pleasure of meeting, but that means nothing. Lexa has not a shot in hell with someone as wonderful as Clarke. The blonde is too perfect. Too gentle and innocent. She would never be with someone as fucked up as Lexa, and that’s even if Clarke could even stand to look at her for more than five seconds at a time, or matter of fact, have a normal conversation with her.

“What’s wrong?” She hears Finn ask, breaking her out of her simply depressing thoughts. Lexa notices that the boy is closer to her now as he tosses the small, white ball back and forth into his own mitt. The fact that this boy is only five years old, and he’s only known Lexa for three days, yet he can already tell when something is wrong with her… well, that’s just crazy. “You got quiet. Did I do something wrong?”

“What?” Lexa replies quickly, squatting down in front of him and dropping her own glove onto the frozen soil beneath them. “No. You didn’t do anything, kid. You’re great.” She smiles, trying to make him feel better because she can tell that he’s starting to worry a bit. “Just got a lot on my mind is all.” It’s really rather funny, or maybe even sad, that Lexa hasn’t really thought much about her impending capture or death for that matter. All she can bring herself to think of is Clarke and those damned blue eyes. They’ve seemed to have haunted her the past two nights. It’s really starting to piss her off, to be completely honest. She has other priorities. Other, more important things to do, but she can’t pull her mind away from this woman. This kid. This house. It’s really starting to do a number on her.

“You thinking about my mom?” Finn asks innocently as he makes to sit down on the ground. Lexa looks at him with cautiously wide eyes, not really knowing what to say to that, because yeah… she is thinking about his mom. When is she not thinking about his mom. It’s so fucking ridiculous. Even this five year old kid can see how helpless she is to the powers of a gorgeous woman, but that’s just it… there’s so much more to Clarke than her beauty. She’s smart. She’s calculating. She’s truthful. She’s good. And all of those things, Lexa has only learned in the past forty-eight hours. She’s afraid to know what she would feel for the blonde in the possible weeks to come. It’s dangerous territory. That’s for certain.

Lexa plops down on the ground beside Finn and nudges him teasingly, tipping him over and making him giggle. She laughs too, pulling him back to sit beside her. “You’re too smart, you know that?” She says, looking down at him with a pair of caring, green eyes. The grin he gives her is enough to melt her heart, and she’s fairly certain that if the temperature weren’t so cold here, that her heart would have stayed melted from the moment that wide, scared, blue eyes turned around in her arms that first night in the dark. She hadn’t realized it then, but she was already a goner. “Yes.” Lexa breathes, realizing that she had already gotten sidetracked again thinking about Clarke. Damnit. “I was thinking about your mom.” She decided to just roll with it and be truthful with the kid. She trusted him not to say anything to his mother about this conversation. He was mature enough for his age. (Way too mature.) Plus, she doesn’t have to say in what capacity she was thinking about Clarke. For all that Finn knows, she and Clarke are just old friends from college.

“I could tell.”

“And how’s that?” She asks curiously.

He shrugs. She grins to herself, because he really is the king of shrugs. “I’m just trying to figure out why you guys are friends.”

Lexa’s brow creases in concentration and in confusion. She wonders what that is supposed to mean. Does he know? Has he found out about her? It really wouldn’t take that much if he ever watches the news and recognizes her on the television screen. “What do you mean?”

“It’s just,” He starts and Lexa can tell that he is thinking hard about his word choices. Something he gets from his mother apparently. “Friends are supposed to have fun and be happy. You and mom, every time that I see you together, you both look sad. Or mad. Or both. You don’t talk to each other much at all. It’s weird.” Holy shit. This kid is perceptive. “Are you fighting?”

“No.” Lexa shakes her head in disagreement. She doesn’t know what to say. She’s sure that if Clarke were here, then she would want to be the one speaking to him about this. She would want Lexa to keep her mouth shut. “We’re not fighting. We’re just trying to – I don’t know – get to know each other.” He raises a brow and she quickly adds. “We haven’t seen each other in so long, everything is different.”

Finn finally looks away from Lexa and she lets out a sigh of relief. His blue eyes look out across the large field behind the house, taking in everything that they can see. “That makes sense I guess.” 

“That’s why I want to just continue to do nice things for your mom. She works so hard. She deserves everything good.” Lexa smiles, receiving one from Finn as well. After a few more minutes of silence and just rolling the baseball on the ground, back and forth to each other, Lexa hears Raven’s car pull up. She’s back with the groceries and Lexa really should get started on dinner. “Want to help me cook? Or do you want to watch TV?”

“I think that I’ll watch TV. I really don’t like the smell of salmon.” He crinkles his nose just thinking about the smell, causing Lexa to laugh and stand up, pulling him with her. “Plus, there’s a new deep sea documentary on Netflix that I want to watch.”

“I knew that there was a reason that I liked you.” She grins, using her hand to ruffle his hair and pull him inside to the warm house.

 

//

 

While Finn is in the living room, luckily within her line of sight so that she can watch him, Lexa is busy in the kitchen making dinner. She’s baking some lemon pepper salmon with asparagus and making homemade mashed potatoes with thyme. Raven picked up a decent looking red wine while she was out, so Lexa would pair that with the meal later. The brunette looks over at the clock on the oven to see how much time she has left until Clarke gets home. She should be here in thirty minutes and that’s about how much time Lexa has left cooking. Perfect timing.

She’s going to strangle Finn if he told her wrong about his mom liking salmon so much. Not really, but she would be really irritated. She wants everything to be perfect. Lexa quickly pops some chicken fingers and fries in the oven for Finn, since he doesn’t eat the fish. “You like chicken fingers and fries, right?” She yells from the kitchen and she gets a thumbs up from Finn who doesn’t even turn around to look.

A few minutes later, Raven comes back upstairs to talk to Lexa. “How’s it going down there?” Lexa asks as she finishes mashing the potatoes that she just boiled and adds some butter and thyme. Raven plops down onto on of the barstools across the counter from Lexa and puts her head in her hands. “Anything?”

“Nope.” The shorter woman responds, clearly upset with not coming up with anything yet. “I just don’t get it. There’s got to be something somewhere to show that Nia was responsible for this. I’ve looked and looked and nothing...”

“Hey…” Lexa says in a calming voice, even though she’s slightly freaking out on the inside. The rest of her life revolves around finding the evidence that they need to put Nia away and give Lexa her life back. “It’s okay, Reyes. We’ll find something. I believe in you and your abilities. It will just take time. This is an old case… something will pop up eventually and when it does, we’ll get her.” Raven nods, but doesn’t say anything else. 

Lexa just finishes up with the meal when the front door opens and Clarke walks in, looking tired as ever. Her jacket is wrapped tightly around her body, while her scarf tries to cover her neck and mouth. Her gloves come off first and then she kicks off her shoes before Finn notices her. “Mom!” The short, brown-headed boy runs to her and wraps his arm around her middle. 

Clarke chuckles and hugs him back. “Did you have a good day today, bud?”

“Yes ma’am!” He exclaims excitedly. “This morning, after you left, me and Lexa finished putting together that t-rex puzzle and then we got dressed and walked around outside for a while so I could show Lexa around the house, and then we came in and I showed Lexa how to download apps on her iPhone. I really don’t know how she’s never used an iPhone before.” He adds before continuing excitedly. “Then we went outside to play catch before we came back in so I could watch that new thing on Netflix and Lexa could make you dinner.”

Of course Finn had to make it sound like Lexa was making dinner just for Clarke, and maybe it seemed that way, but she most certainly wasn’t. She was making dinner for everyone. She just happened to want to know what Clarke liked. Regardless, her face immediately turned a light shade of red, and she had to turn her body so that Clarke couldn’t see her face when she looked up from Finn. “Lexa made dinner?” Clarke asks curiously, looking over in the direction of the brunette who refused to look at her.

Raven realized the awkward tension that was rolling around the room, so she thought that she would give Lexa and Clarke a bit of a chance to discuss their days without she and Finn being in there to listen. “Finn, - uh – you want to go outside with me and show me that killer throw that I’ve been hearing about?”

“Yeah!” He exclaims, removing his arms from his mother and starting for the door.

“Jacket!” Lexa turns to yell at him before he can walk outside, and the word makes Clarke turn quickly to look at her again. This time they’re eyes meet and Lexa feels the heat return to her face. Clarke looks at her differently. Something is different. Lexa just can’t seem to put her finger on it.

After Raven and Finn make their way outside, Clarke pulls her jacket off and hangs it up beside the door on the coat rack. “Smells good.” The blonde says, breaking the silence that seems to overtake the pair every time that they’re alone.

Lexa is looking back at the oven, pulling the baking dish out that holds the salmon and asparagus. She’s too afraid to look at the blonde. She can feel her resolve wavering. Clarke always has this effect on her. Lexa always turns into this awkward weirdo with no apt for conversation. “How was your day?” Lexa asks, not looking up at Clarke, but removing the fish from the pan onto a serving platter.

“It was okay.” Clarke huffs, making her way into the kitchen. “Oh my god.” The blonde utters, slightly startling Lexa, causing the brunette to look at her. “Is that salmon?” Lexa smiles a bit before nodding her head. "It's been so long since I've eaten salmon."

“I uh – I wanted to make dinner and I asked Finn what – uh – what your favorite food was.” This is the third time that Lexa has blushed in the ten minutes of Clarke being home. Fucking great. “I hope that he was right.” She makes herself grin, trying to be the confident person that she knows that she normally is. That is, when she’s not around Clarke fucking Griffin.

Lexa is startled once again when she feels body heat radiating from somewhere close beside her. She glances sideways to see that Clarke is right beside her, and her breathing immediately picks up and she thinks that she might actually die. She can’t stand this. She can’t stand the proximity without being to touch. “He was right.” Clarke responds softly, causing Lexa to look up and meet her cerulean eyes. Something happens then. Something that Lexa can’t explain, but when Clarke gives her a small grin, her confidence seems to come back in spades and she’s never been more grateful. “He doesn’t like it though.”

“I was told.” Lexa chuckles, moving around Clarke to take the food over to the dining table. She wonders how long it’s been since anyone has eaten at it instead of the island. “I made him some chicken fingers and fries as well.”

She hears Clarke hum in acknowledgement. “How was today, really?” The blonde asks. 

“It was fine, but I’m not going to lie… I was terrified all day.” Lexa answers honestly and looks back to Clarke to see a small smile again. That damned smile will be yet another thing that will be the death of her. 

“Why?”

“Because I wouldn’t be able to live with myself if something happened to him.” Lexa’s honesty continues, surprising Clarke in a different way. “Plus, I mean, have you seen you?” Lexa asks, causing Clarke to raise a brow. “You’re fucking intimidating as hell.” Lexa teases, and when Clarke laughs, it’s the best sound that she’s ever heard in her life. She wants to hear it for the rest of her life, and then she realizes what she just thought of and immediately back pedals. That was once again, roaming into dangerous territory.

Lexa finally had the table set after another couple of minutes. They hadn’t said anything else and Lexa was whirring around the kitchen, knowing that Clarke’s eyes were following her everywhere she went. “Ready to eat, Miss Griffin?” The brunette asks, pulling out a chair for Clarke.

“Ye – um -yeah.” The blonde stutters. Clearly, Lexa had startled her out of her own thoughts. “Let me go get Finn and Raven.”

“I’ll get them” Lexa says. “Sit.” Surprisingly, Clarke does as she’s told and before Lexa can stick her head out the door to yell for Finn and Raven, Clarke speaks.

“Lexa?”

“Yes?”

“Can we – uh,” The blonde fidgets uncomfortably in her seat and looks down at her hands in her lap. Lexa finds it a bit amusing to see Clarke like this because usually she’s the definition of confidence and intimidation. “Can we maybe – I don’t know… Can we talk later? After dinner?”

Lexa’s breathing picks up once again and her heart starts to beat a tattoo against the inside of her chest. She knows what this means. This means that Clarke is ready. Clarke is ready to listen to her, if Lexa is willing to speak. No one has ever wanted to hear her out. Especially not an almost stranger. Lexa grins and nods her head. “I’d like that very much, Clarke.” She says, earning another grin from the blonde before she sticks her head out the door to yell for Finn and Raven.

This night just got a whole lot more interesting.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well, what did you think? Let me know in the comments below and don't forget that kudos are greatly appreciated! :)
> 
> Love you guys!
> 
> Follow me on Twitter @asuzh90
> 
> (And if you're wondering why I don't post many Clexa related things or anything like that, I'm not out to my family and friends...so yeah...but feel free to DM me with any questions or ideas for my fics.)


	5. She is The Sun

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> What's up, guys? I hope that everyone is well. Here's the newest update! I hope that you enjoy!

“Oh my god.” A very stuffed Raven utters as she leans back in her chair at Clarke’s dining room table. She pats her belly with a smug look on her face. “That was so fuc – “ Raven catches herself and glances over to make sure that Finn didn’t catch it as well. He didn’t. “That was so good.” She decides on. She’s not putting any more fucking money in that damned swear jar.

Lexa stands from her chair and chuckles at her friend. The taller brunette starts to grab everyone’s empty plates and head into the kitchen to clean them. Finn immediately jumps up to return to the living room so that he can finish the documentary that he started earlier, but not before yelling a quick ‘thank you’ to Lexa for his chicken and fries. Raven follows him, knowing that she needs to give Lexa and Clarke as much space as they can get. 

Raven knows that Lexa has a massive crush on the blonde. That’s obvious, but that’s not why she’s giving them space. She’s giving them space because she knows how important it is for Lexa to have someone trust in her. Someone to believe in her. The only people who have ever even tried to listen to her friend and her side of the story are her, Lincoln, and Nyko. That’s it. If for some reason Lexa could manage to get   
Clarke on their side, then she knows that that would help boost Lexa’s self-confidence and help her start to move on.

Lexa is rolling up the sleeves of her flannel button up to start washing dishes, when she senses a presence behind her. She knows that it’s Clarke, without a doubt. She doesn’t turn around though. Instead, she starts washing the dirty dishes from dinner. If Clarke has something to say, then she’ll say it. It feels as if ages have passed, before the blonde actually does say something. “Let me clean these.” Clarke mutters, as she moves to stand beside the taller woman. “You’ve done enough.”

“Not a chance in hell.” Lexa replies, taking a small side glance at Clarke and smirking when she sees the faux glare that she’s giving. At least she hopes that it’s fake. “Go take a shower, Clarke. I can wash the dishes.”

“Are you saying that I smell?” The blonde asks, and Lexa swears that Clarke is teasing her. If so, this is a first, and she can’t wait for more witty banter and teasing with the blonde.

“I didn’t say that, Clarke.” Lexa answers. “I just thought that you might would like to change and relax after work. Especially if you want to talk later.” Lexa never looks up from her soapy hands in the warm water below her.

“Okay.” The blonde relents easier than Lexa thought that she would. Maybe she’s as tired of arguing with Lexa as Lexa is with her. Clarke begins to walk off, towards her bedroom before she turns around. “Lexa?”

“Yes, Clarke?”

“Thank you. For the dinner.” Clarke smiles, continuing to melt Lexa’s quickly beating heart. “Raven was right… it was so fucking good.” She whispers the last part so that Finn doesn’t hear her and prompt her to pay up as well. Lexa chuckles before Clarke makes her way down the hallway.

Once Lexa finishes with the dishes, Raven informs her that she’s heading back to her ‘lair’, so Lexa joins Finn on the couch. “Aren’t you tired, bud? You’ve played all day.” The brunette asks the boy when she plops down beside him on the couch.

“Yeah, but this only likes a few more minutes.” He answers, pointing his small index finger towards the screen of the television. “Then I’m going to put my PJs on.” Finn grins at Lexa and she smiles back before resting her head on the back of the couch. The pair sits in silence for around ten minutes or so, before Finn speaks again and Lexa notices that the credits to the movie are rolling. She was so lost in her thoughts, she hadn’t even realized. And they were most definitely not thoughts of a certain blonde.

“I think mom really liked the food.” Finn says, looking over to his new friend. 

Lexa lifts her head to look at him. “Yeah?” He nods in agreement. “I hope so. Thanks for your help today, kid.”

“No problem. I’m going to change now.” He practically jumps from his spot on the couch. “Lex?” Lexa chuckles at his newfound nickname for her. She thinks that it’s absolutely adorable, and she’s glad that he is feeling comfortable with her. She wishes that his mom was.

“What’s up?”

“When I change, can you tell me a bedtime story?” His voice is shy, meek even, and she can tell that he is really expecting Lexa to deny him of such. She can’t deny that she’s taken aback by his request, and she has no idea what kind of story she would even possibly tell him, but all she does is nod her head with a smile and his eyes widen in response. “Really? Yay!” He cheers before running into his room. Lexa finds it weird and intriguing how much two different people can warm your heart so much in so many different ways. Finn and Clarke both have this strange hold on her, and she wishes that she could get past it. She really does.   
She knows that this is just temporary. This won’t last. In a few weeks or so, she’ll have to leave at some point. Either to turn herself back in because she can’t find evidence in her favor, or because she’s going after Nia. Either way, she won’t see Clarke or Finn again.

After a few short minutes, Lexa stands and makes her way into Finn’s room. She figures that he’s had plenty of time to get dressed for bed, and she was right when she walks in and sees him tucking himself under the covers of his twin-sized bed. “Ready, Freddy?” Lexa grins.

“My name’s not Freddy.” Finn grumbles, causing Lexa to laugh before she sits on the chair beside the kid’s bed. She expects that the story thing is a pretty regular occurrence, hence the chair.

“What kind of story do you want to hear?” She asks, still unsure of what she’s going to tell him.

“I don’t know.” He shrugs under the covers.

Lexa finally gets an idea and chuckles to herself. “Well, what if I just tell you a few terribly short ones? Some that have no point at all?”

Finn grins up at her and nods his head. “That sounds fun.”

“Yeah?” She asks just to make sure. This is her first time ever giving a bedtime story and she doesn’t want to flunk. He nods his head and she continues, but neither one of them realizes that Clarke is standing just outside the door listening to them the entire time. She almost interrupts them to tell Finn to let Lexa go, but she gets a strange, unfamiliar feeling in her gut at the way that Lexa acts with him, so she lets them continues. “Okay, so…” Lexa thinks. “Once there was a pickle named Fred.”

“A pickle?”

“Yep. A pickle. And then one day, out of nowhere… someone ate him.” Finn busts out into a fit of laughter when he realizes that that was the end of the story, and Clarke herself, standing on the outside of the door has to hold back her chuckle.

“That was stupid.” The small boy says once he catches his breath.

“Hey!” Lexa exclaims, feigning hurt. “I worked really hard on that.”

“Whatever, Lex.” He replies, causing Clarke’s heart to start pumping faster and faster. Her son has a nickname for this woman. A woman they’ve known for three days, and she’s already made such an impact on Finn’s life. And Clarke would be lying to herself if she said that Lexa hasn’t affected her too.

“Okay. So next one…” The brunette says, leaning over the bed from the chair and placing her elbows beside Finn and putting her chin in her hands. “Once, there was a little boy who wouldn’t go to sleep… and then he did.”

Finn barks with laughter again. “Was that talking about me?”

“I don’t know.” Lexa shrugs, mimicking Finn’s earlier actions. “Maybe.”

The pair laughs for a minute or so, while Lexa keeps poking the young boy in the side to tickle him. Clarke, still standing quietly outside the door, feels a tear start to fall slowly down her pale cheek. She quickly wipes it and shakes her head. ‘This is ridiculous.’ She thinks to herself. There’s no reason for this to be affecting her so much…. But then there is. Finn has never been like this with anyone, and then again, no one has ever been like this with Finn. Not even Clarke herself.

After Finn’s laughter dies down, he looks at Lexa seriously. “Lex, are you a mommy?” Her chuckling seizes and her eyes go wide at the question.

“Wh – what?”

“Do you have any kids?”

“Uh – no. I don’t.” She shakes her head.

“Why not?” He asks. “I think that you’d be a great mommy.” Lexa grins at the young boy and reaches over to push his long, floppy hair out of his eyes. 

“I guess I’ve just never found the right person. I’d like to find someone someday to start a family with.” She answers honestly, and she doesn’t know why she did. Plus, she’s been in prison so she really hasn’t had a chance to find someone to start a family with.

“I wish my mom could find someone else.” He says, rolling over on his back to look at the ceiling, and Clarke almost runs in right then to stop him from saying anything else, but she can’t. She can’t make herself do that, and a part of her wants to know what he says next. “I wish that I had a daddy.” He continues, and Clarke’s heart shatters with those seven small words. The tears do come then. She can’t stop them. 

In the room with Finn, Lexa’s heart shatters almost just as equally. She doesn’t know Clarke and Finn’s story, but she’s not about to ask the child in front of her. Plus, it’s not any of her business. “Or another mommy.” He adds then, and Lexa almost loses it. Does that mean – Does that mean what she thinks it does? Is Clarke into girls? No… she couldn’t be, and even if she were, how would Finn know. Perhaps she’s dated recently, and he knows. Perhaps she is dating right now. Shit. Lexa hadn’t even thought of that. Shit. Shit. Shit.

“Your mom is one of the most amazing people that I’ve ever met, Finn.” Lexa says, laying a hand on his shoulder, causing him to look back to her. “One day, someone will come in and swoop her off her feet, and that person will love you just as much. Maybe someday you’ll get your wish. Maybe someday you will have a new mom or dad. I know it in my heart that you will. You and your mom are too good to pass up.” She smiles, causing the boy to smile wide too. “Now, how about you close your eyes and go to sleep. You had a long day, and I’ll try to work on my storytelling skills.” He laughs again before sitting up and giving Lexa a tight hug, which she returns without hesitation. 

“Thanks, Lex.” And with that he rolls over and Lexa flicks off the lamp on his nightstand.

Clarke, still posted up outside the door, has been lost in her thoughts. Lexa’s little speech that she gave to Finn has got to be the most precious thing that she’s ever heard in her life, and she can’t believe that it came from Lexa Woods. Lexa thinks that she’s amazing? Lexa thinks that she and Finn are too good to pass up? What does that even mean? 

Suddenly, the blonde realizes that their conversation is over and that means that Lexa is on her way out, so she quickly but quietly, backs up to her room and stands just inside the door there until she hears Lexa leave and head back to the living room. Clarke has to stand there for a while to catch her breath. And let her heartrate slow down. And keep her tears at bay. She just needed to calm the fuck down. Period.

 

//

 

A few minutes have went by since Lexa left Finn’s bedroom and her mind was still whirring. That kid was something else. Something special. He made her genuinely smile and laugh and cut up. She enjoyed his company. Lexa can’t believe the conversation that they had gotten into. One second they were goofing off telling stupid stories, and the next, Finn is talking about how he wishes his mom could find him a new daddy… or a mommy. Lexa’s head was still reeling from that. She doesn’t know why. That doesn’t mean a single thing. Clarke, more than likely, is just raising her son to be open minded and that it doesn’t matter who you love.

Yep. That’s all that it was. Clarke Griffin, definitely wasn’t into women.

After another few minutes of sitting uncomfortably on the couch, Lexa starts becoming more and more restless. She’s patiently awaiting Clarke to join her so that they can talk. Lexa doesn’t know what she’s so nervous. She did nothing wrong. Hell… there’s really not even much of a story to tell, but just the fact that someone wanted to actually listen to her… well, that was a whole other ballgame.  
Lexa hears a noise from down the hallway. It was the closing of a door and the brunette’s heart started to pump quicker and louder. This was it. Clarke is on her way. Sure enough, only a few seconds later, Clarke is standing in the living room in front of her. Something about her face, her eyes… she looks as if she’s been crying. Possibly. But Lexa knows that it’s none of her business, even though the thought of Clarke being upset about something threatens to tear her apart.

She expects Clarke to sit in the armchair across from the sofa, but to her surprise, the blonde sits down on the other end of the couch. There’s probably two or three feet between them, but still being this close to Clarke always seems to throw her for a loop. “Is everything okay?” Lexa asks, but knowing Clarke, she would either lie or just ignore her completely. 

The blonde went with the former and decided to move right on into things. “So… are you ready to talk?”

“Are you ready to listen?” Lexa fires back, and her tone is more harsh than she actually meant for it to be. She notices the slight rise of Clarke’s perfectly shaped eyebrow, and immediately regrets it. “I – uh – I’m sorry. I’m just a bit nervous.”

“Why are you nervous? It’s not like I’m the one that can change everything for you.” Clarke asks curiously, pulling he knees up to her chest and leaning her back against the armrest of the sofa. “All you’re doing it simply telling me a story. Your story. That’s it.”

Lexa begins to shake her head in disagreement. “It’s more than that to me, Clarke. Yes. I know that I’m just telling my side of things… but somehow… this feels – I don’t know – different.” Because it’s you, is what   
Lexa wants to say, but she controls her urge.

“Well, here I am.” Clarke says, laying her chin on her kneecaps. “Let’s hear it.”

“Okay.” Lexa breathes out. This was it. She hoped for the impossible when this was all over. She hoped to hear those three little words from the blonde when she was done. 

I believe you.

“Raven and I were on a late flight back from Monte Carlo.” Lexa begins. “The weather everywhere had been gross, and so it pushed us behind schedule. I was supposed to meet my parents for dinner at one of our favorite restaurants in L.A. when I got back. Of course, I couldn’t make it because we didn’t land until a little after two in the morning. Our flight was on my parents’ private jet and so the only people on the plane were myself, Raven, Frank the pilot, and his co-pilot for the night. I believe his name was Scott. I had only ever flown with Frank. He worked for my parents for years, and I had known him practically my whole life.”

Lexa looked up to see if Clarke was still listening, and of course she was. Clarke wouldn’t go back on her word and not at least give Lexa a chance. Even after only knowing the blonde for three days, she knew her better than that. Lexa continues her narrative. “Anyways, Scott drove Raven home. They were ‘seeing’ each other if you know what I mean.” Lexa says, throwing up air quotes around the word ‘seeing’. “I offered   
Frank a ride home in the car with me, but he refused. Said he had a cab waiting for him, so I left. I made it to the house around three that morning. All of the lights were out and all of the help had left, which wasn’t unusual because it was three in the morning. I knew that my parents would already be in bed. It was a Sunday night, and they always started their weekdays off early, but their room was on the way to my room. I noticed that their door was open, which was unusual in itself because mom had a weird phobia about it while she slept, so I tiptoed over so that I wouldn’t wake them.” Lexa stops and takes a deep breath. Clarke notices that she’s focused on her hands that are folded in her lap. Clarke is about to say something when she doesn’t think that Lexa will continue, but she does. “When I looked in through the door, I saw my mom lying on the bed facing me. He – her eyes were wide open, like she was staring at me, so I called in to her. I must have said ‘mom’ like half a dozen times before I realized that I would never get an answer. The lights were off in their room, but the bathroom light was on and the door was open, so that allowed me to see my mother’s face better as I walked over to her. I saw the marks immediately. Her throat was – it was swollen and bruised. At this point, tears are flowing down my face and I try to muffle my sobs because I don’t know if whoever did this is still in there or not. I use my hand to cover my mouth. There were rope marks around her neck. Someone had strangled her to death.” 

Clarke sees the tears start to form in Lexa’s eyes, and she finds herself itching to move closer. Itching to take the brunette’s hand in her own. Itching to wipe those tears away… but of course she doesn’t. “I gave myself a few seconds to calm down… of course that never happened because I just found my mother’s lifeless body in our home.” Lexa shakes her head and continues. Clarke can see the toll that it’s starting to take on the other woman. “I walked into the bathroom. They never left the lights on, so I knew that something else was near, and I was terrified, because it’s as if I already knew. In the back of my mind. I already knew what was in the bathroom. And I was right… my dad.” Lexa gulped and brought her hands up to wipe at her eyes. She couldn’t bring herself to look at Clarke. 

“There was clearly a struggle. There were things strowed everywhere, and I noticed that my father’s hands were beaten and bloody. Whoe – whoever did that to them, didn’t get off easy. The next thing that I noticed was my father’s head busted open and he was lying in a pool of his own blood. I had to bring up my other hand then to suppress my screams.” Lexa is fully crying now, and Clarke finds herself moving closer, but not too close. There’s still about a foot between them. “I remember it like it was yesterday. You don’t forget stuff like that. I knelt down beside him. I didn’t know what to do. I didn’t know what to do with my hands. I touched him, I shook him… I just wanted him to open his eyes. I couldn’t be left alone. I was only eighteen and my parents were the best people that I had ever known.”

“After a minute or so, of my just sitting there crying and begging my father to wake up, I heard a noise. It came from downstairs, and I don’t know what I thought I was going to do, but I ran. I ran down those marble stairs of my childhood home straight for the noise. Once I reached the den, I saw that the back door was wide open. I stuck my head outside and that’s when I saw them. I saw someone. They were running away, so I ran too. I chased after them in the dark. The ground was wet from the impossible amount of rain that we had just gotten, so it slowed me down a bit. I was too slow. I couldn’t catch them.” Lexa shook her head again, clearly still upset at herself for not being able to keep up with person. 

“I ran forever. I wasn’t going to give up, but then… someone caught me out of nowhere.” Lexa looked up at the ceiling and closed her eyes. “It was a cop, and soon after there were two more, and then three more… someone had called them already. They wouldn’t let me go. I kept telling them that he was getting away. Whoever did that was getting away. So, I started fighting them. My father had me in mixed martial arts classes pretty much since I could walk, so I knew that I could get take some of them. I landed a few punches, but never got free.”

“You fought the cops?” Clarke asks with wide eyes. “Lexa…”

“What was I supposed to do, Clarke?” Lexa snaps. “The fucker that killed my parents was getting away and the cops didn’t give a single shit.” That’s when Clarke knew. She could see it in those emerald eyes. She could feel it in the air around them. She could hear it in Lexa’s breathing. The way that Lexa was so worked up… the way that she snapped at Clarke when the blonde scolded her for fighting against the cops. Clarke knew.

Lexa was telling the truth.

After a few moments of silence, Lexa speaks again. “I didn’t know it at the time, but I was covered in blood. My father’s blood. I’m sure it got on me while I was kneeling with him in the bathroom and trying to wake him up. I tracked it throughout the whole house and didn’t even realize it. To make matters worse, I had gotten into a fight in Monte Carlo the night before.” Lexa looked at Clarke.

“Your face was cut and bruised wasn’t it?” The blonde asks and Lexa nods. “They assumed that your father’s hands were bloody because he was hitting you.”

Lexa nods again. “Yes. And to make matters worse, that fucker strangled my mother with my black belt. My actual roped black belt.” Lexa lets out a sarcastic chuckle and brings her hands to her face again. “Needless to say… I was fucked. Everything was against me, and naturally my hairs were found everywhere because I fucking lived there.”

“What about Frank? The pilot? He would have been your alibi.” Clarke says softly. “And Raven?”

“It had only just happened when I got there, so the timeline was pretty absolute, but they made sure to take care of Frank too. No one ever saw him or Scott again.” Lexa replies. “Not only did my parents lose their lives, but two other innocents lost theirs because of a fucking power struggle. And that meant that no one knew that Raven was with me either… no one would believe my best friend. They thought that she was just covering for me.”

“Lexa…” Clarke starts in, after she realizes that the brunette is most likely through talking. “I’m so –“

“Don’t.” Lexa snaps again and stands up to walk over to the window in the living room. She doesn’t know why she snapped. She’s just emotional now, and she doesn’t need anyone’s pity. She just wants someone to trust her. “I don’t need your pity, Clarke.” The brunette has her back to Clarke and she expects her to still be sitting on the couch. That is until she feels a hand on her wrist, spinning her around to face blue eyes.

It’s nothing but silence, and possibly the sounds of two quickened heartrates, that surrounds the two women for what feels like an eternity. Clarke doesn’t know why she got up and grabbed Lexa. She doesn’t know why she can’t find her words right now. And she definitely doesn’t know why she can’t break her eyes from the green ones in front of her. Clarke realizes that she still has a hold on the brunette’s wrist, but she still doesn’t let go. She can feel Lexa’s pulse through her touch there, and she knows that Lexa is real.

Lexa starts to pull away and turn again, but Clarke doesn’t allow her to. No. The blonde pulls her closer, until they are only a breath away. Blue eyes search her own for something. She doesn’t know what and she doesn’t really care at this point. She’s sure that her heart will fly completely out of her chest at any moment, but before it has the chance to, Clarke is pulling her in for a hug. Definitely not expected. 

Clarke’s pale arms wrap around Lexa’s midsection and Lexa can only stand there like a fool for a moment with her arms hanging down her sides. She finally realizes what’s happening, and hesitantly moves her own arms to hug Clarke back. Clarke’s head is resting against Lexa’s chest and the brunette prays that the blonde can’t hear the sudden arrhythmia happening there now. She is almost knocked back by the scent of 

Clarke’s freshly washed hair and she wants nothing more than to bury her nose there, but knows that she shouldn’t.

If Lexa only knew how badly Clarke was freaking out on the inside, she wouldn’t feel quite as bad about her slight freak-out. Clarke was a mess, internally, right now. She doesn’t know why she’s doing this. It’s like she’s on auto-pilot or something. Or she’s having an outer-body experience. Something came over her and she didn’t know what else to do. This is what she does when she wants to comfort people. Her friends.   
And even though she and Lexa are far from friends, she knows that the other woman needed this right now, so she pushed her own feelings aside for this moment. 

Lexa’s scent is intoxicating. Clarke already knew this, but now, now she’s right here. Straight at the source, and it’s almost too much. She doesn’t realize that she starts to tighten her arms, and pushes her cheek further into Lexa’s chest. Lexa’s arms are wrapped lightly around her, almost as if she is afraid that Clarke might snap on her at any moment. Clarke can feel Lexa’s breath hitting the top of her head and she thinks that she might lose it.

“I believe you.” Clarke utters, and it’s only just above a whisper. She feels Lexa tense in her arms for a bit, and Clarke rubs small circles in between Lexa’s shoulder blades to calm her. “It’s okay.” The blonde continues, like they’re the only two people in the world right now, and she realizes that this is way too fucking intimate. She has to end this soon. “I believe you.” She repeats, and after a few more seconds, she begins to pull back until they are no longer touching. A weird sensation rushes her body and all of a sudden it’s as if she can breathe again, but at the same time… she feels like she’s suffocating. Like she needs to be back closer to the brunette and that feeling… Well, that feeling is fucking terrifying.

Clarke sees the tears in Lexa’s eyes, but doesn’t comment on it. She knows that Lexa doesn’t want her pity nor does she want Clarke to point something like her tears out. “We’ll talk tomorrow.” Clarke says quietly, trying to reassure Lexa that she’s serious about helping her and that she’s serious about believing her. “I’ll help do whatever I need to do when I get home from work, okay?” Lexa can only nod. She’s still speechless. “Are you okay to keep Finn tomorrow?” Clarke asks again as she keeps backing up from Lexa, afraid to turn around and leave her. She wonders how inappropriate it would be to ask Lexa to stay with her in her room, because right now… all that Clarke wants to do is be near her. Again, she doesn’t know why. It’s a foreign feeling to her. Or at least an old one. She’s want to take care of her.

“Clarke…” Lexa finally manages, and her voice is weak and full of exhaustion. “I – “ The blonde raises a brow at Lexa from across the room. “Of course I can keep him.”  
Clarke grins at Lexa softly, receiving a small one in return. “Goodnight, Lexa.” She says before turning and walking down the hallway. Again, Lexa doesn’t hear the lock click tonight.

“Goodnight, Clarke.”

 

//

 

When Clarke wakes the next morning, she’s thankful that it’s Friday. She won’t have to go to work on Saturday or Sunday, and she gets to go and pick up Octavia at the airport on Sunday. She’s ready to get this day over with and get home to spend time with Finn, and if she’s honest with herself, Lexa. But, Clarke Griffin is not honest with herself.

Once she’s ready for work, she makes her way to the kitchen and sees that all of the lights are still off. Finn is still tucked safely away in his bed, and she looks to the living room to see Lexa still sleeping on the sofa. She can’t help the smile that forms on her face at the brunette’s sleeping form. She’s on her stomach with one arm tucked under her and the other hanging off of the side of the couch. Her mouth is slightly open and her long brown hair seems to be flowing every which way. It’s then, however, that Clarke notices something. Lexa is way too long for the couch. Clarke hadn’t realized it, but that can’t be comfortable for the other woman. She would have to think of somewhere else for Lexa to sleep.

Clarke walks into the kitchen and tries her best attempt at being quiet while she makes a pot of coffee. While she waits, she leans her arms over onto the kitchen island and watches the sleeping woman on the couch. In the least creepiest way possible. She can’t help but reminisce about their talk last night. Lexa was so open and vulnerable. And truthful. It made Clarke’s heart hurt at how badly she had treated Lexa. 

She didn’t think that she could ever forgive herself for the way that she’s been acting.

As Clarke stands there, lost in her own thoughts, her blue eyes rake over Lexa’s face and her sculpted jaw, and then they move down to the woman’s toned back that she can even see through the thin material of her sleep shirt. Her long legs seem to go on for days, and Clarke wonders what it might feel like to run her fingers through that long, glorious hair. There’s only one word that comes to Clarke’s mind when she looks at Lexa.

Perfection.

The beeping of the coffee pot pulls her out of her thoughts, and she rolls her eyes at herself for watching Lexa sleep again. This is what? The third? The fourth time? Really, Clarke… this is getting out of control.

After she makes her coffee, with way too much sugar and creamer, she decided to make Lexa a mug as well. She wants Lexa to be up before she leaves so that she knows that Finn won’t be alone when he wakes.   
She really hates to wake the brunette up, because if she was anything like Clarke, then she didn’t sleep much at all either. Clarke’s mind had been reeling with everything that had happened the previous night.   
Between her conversation with Lexa, and Lexa’s conversation with Finn that she had overheard… and let’s not forget that hug. Clarke didn’t think that it was possible to have a life-changing hug, and she may be being a bit dramatic when she thinks ‘life-changing’, but it certainly felt that way.

She remembers that Lexa took her coffee black yesterday morning, so that’s what she does again before making her way over to sit on the coffee table across from the brunette. She spends another minute or five watching Lexa, (This was really getting ridiculous) before she’s interrupted. “You’re staring again, Clarke.” Lexa’s sleepy voice mutters before Clarke looks to her face to see Lexa use her hand to wipe at her mouth.  
Clarke’s sure that her face is fifty shades of red right now, but she laughs it off with a small chuckle, thinking about every other time that Lexa has caught her staring. “I’m still trying to figure you out, Woods.”

Lexa sits up, and tugs her blanket closer to her. It was so damn cold outside, that it was really affecting the warmth of the house. Clarke hands Lexa her coffee. “You should about have it figured out – thank you.”   
Lexa says accepting the mug from the blonde. “You know more about me now than anyone else in my life. Except for Raven of course.” Clarke doesn’t know whether to smile or feel sad that Lexa really doesn’t have anyone in her life now. Everyone that she knew before, is either dead or didn’t believe her.

“I don’t think that I’ll ever have you figured out.” Clarke responds honestly.

“Ditto.” Lexa says, groggily.

Clarke, once again, catches herself staring, and she has to avert her eyes. Lexa is so fucking beautiful, it almost hurts to look at her. Clarke sets her mug down on the coffee table where she sits. “I need to check your wound.” The blonde says. “All of the cuts on your face have almost disappeared.”

“Thank God.” Lexa breathes out. “I didn’t think that they were ever going to go away. I thought that I’d never be able to pick up chicks again.” The brunette teases, causing Clarke to roll her eyes.

“Shut up and take of your shirt.” Clarke says, standing up from her seated position.

“Shit, Griffin. Ask a girl to dinner first.” Okay… playful Lexa is damn sexy. Clarke almost can’t control herself. She wants to just jump the brunette’s bones right then. Shit, Clarke. Get it together. That absolutely, unequivocally cannot happen.

Clarke can only make herself scoff. “You wish.”

‘I do.’ Lexa thinks to herself. ‘I really do.’ But she doesn’t vocalize it. She only stands up, sets her mug down beside Clarke’s and stretches her arms up above her head. And even though Clarke told her to, the blonde was absolutely not prepared for what happened next. Lexa grabs at the collar of her own shirt and slowly lifts it to pull it over her head. Okay… so Clarke has seen Lexa with no shirt before, but that was different and Clarke was too focused on saving the woman’s life to truly pay attention to every detail of Lexa’s body. 

Holy shit.

Lexa is standing in front of her, clad in a black sports bra and grey sweatpants. Her pants are so, so low on the woman’s hips. Clarke can see the perfect ‘v’ shape of Lexa’s lower half, and Clarke seriously thinks that she might start drooling. A toned abdomen is what she sees next and all Clarke can think of is that Lexa legit looks like she’s photoshopped. The blonde never thought that collarbones could be sexy, but   
Lexa’s… Lexa’s does something funny to her insides. And those fucking arms. ‘Just wrap me up in them right now.’ Clarke thinks. Fuck.

“Like what you see, Griffin?” Clarke’s blue eyes shoot up to meet green ones and Lexa is sporting that damned smirk of hers and Clarke knows that she’s been caught again.

“Lie down.” Clarke responds, completely ignoring Lexa’s comment. The brunette does as she’s told and lies back down on the couch on her back. She flinches when Clarke’s hands touch her skin, and she removes the old bandages. “I’m sorry.” Clarke says quickly, shooting her eyes up to meet Lexa’s. “Did I – did I hurt you?”

“No.” Lexa says quietly, shaking her head. “It’s fine.”

“It seems to be healing nicely from the looks of it.” The blonde says, running her finger around the bullet hole in Lexa’s stomach. If she only knew what she was making Lexa feel right now, doing that, she would stop. “Are you sore?” Lexa nods. “Badly?”

“No. Just a bit.”

“Good. That’s to be expected.” Clarke responds. “Let me run to my bedroom and get some more bandages and I’ll fix you up again before I head out.” Lexa doesn’t have time to respond before Clarke gets up and   
leaves her there. The blonde is back before she knows it, smiling down at her as she slowly kneels beside the couch. “I’m going to put this antibiotic ointment on there first. It will probably be cold.” 

Clarke was right about it being cold. Lexa flinches even harder that time and Clarke chuckles. “Shut it.” Lexa teases.

After she’s applied the ointment, she starts with her new bandages. It doesn’t take long at all, and Lexa doesn’t know if Clarke realizes it or not, but she certainly does… Clarke is rubbing her hand across Lexa’s stomach, softly, as if caressing it. Lexa closes her eyes at the feeling and takes a deep breath. As soon as the touch was there, however, it was gone just as quickly. She opens her eyes to see Clarke standing and grabbing the older bandages to throw them away.

Lexa sits up and throws her shirt back on, missing the small pout that forms on the blonde’s face. “Thank you, Clarke. For everything. Best nurse I’ve ever had.” The brunette smiles a wide, bright smile that only makes Clarke want to fall into her even more.

“You’re damn straight.” Clarke teases.

“No, I’m not.” Lexa teases right back. “Not in the least bit.”

Clarke chuckles as she throws the bandages away in the garbage can in the kitchen. “Good to know.” She walks back over to Lexa so she doesn’t have to talk loudly. She doesn’t want to wake Finn up. “Okay… I’m gone for the day. Call me if you need me for anything. Don’t make dinner tonight. You’ve done enough. We can order takeout or something when I get back.”

“Okay.” Lexa smiles. She notices that Clarke’s star necklace is turn around backwards in a knot. She looks back up to blue eyes before leaning closer and bring her hands up. Her warm hands brush against Clarke’s collarbone, as she fixes the necklace, stealing Clarke’s breath in the process. When she pulls back, she thinks that she sees Clarke’s eyes flicker down to her lips, but no… That can’t be right. “Have a good day,   
Clarke.”

“You too.” The blonde responds, breathless. “I’ll only call a couple of times today. Not every hour like yesterday.” Lexa sure that her heart might explode. Clarke is actually starting to trust her around Finn. This is quite possibly the happiest she’s been in a long time.

 

//

 

“So, Finn…” Lexa says, as the two of them sit outside in the cold early December weather. The sun is out, but you would never know it with how chilly it is outside. The two of them have been outside for about an hour playing catch, and Lexa can already tell so much improvement in the young boy’s throw. She’s glad to see that she could help him, and help him enjoy them game better as well. “What are you asking Santa Claus for?”

Lexa had been thinking about it all day. She wanted to know what Finn had been wanting so that she could make sure that he got it. This kid deserves the best, and that’s what he was going to get. She figures that she will still be here with Clarke and Finn through Christmas, or at least she hopes that she is. It’s only two weeks away. She’ll also have to try and figure out the perfect gift for Clarke as well, and that might be tough, but just like Finn… Clarke deserves the best.

“I haven’t really thought about it.” Finn responds, tossing the ball in the air as he sits and catches it. “I don’t really need anything.” This kid is too much. What five year old kid says that they don’t need anything for Christmas? Come on. Really?

“You may not need anything, kid, but surely there’s something that you would like to have.” The brunette says, pushing him teasingly with her arm. “I’m sure you’ve been good enough to at least get one present.” She grins.

“Well…” He says after a few minutes of intense thought. Lexa can’t stop grinning at him because he is taking this so seriously. “I have been wanting to learn how to ride a bicycle. So, maybe a bicycle?” Finn half states half asks, looking up at Lexa. “I think that a bike would be cool.”

“A bike would be so cool.” Lexa says with a bright smile following. Bingo. “Anything else?”

He shrugs and thinks a bit more. “I think that I want to start wearing baseball hats. Like the pros.”

“A baseball hat, huh? What’s your favorite team?”

“Not sure.” He says, laying back on the grass and setting his glove and ball down beside him. “What’s your favorite?” The boy asks Lexa.

“The Padres.” She answers with a sad smile. “That was always mine and my dad’s favorite team.”

“I think a Padres’ cap would be cool.” He smiles, receiving one in return from the brunette. She thought that it was way too cute that he picked her favorite team because he didn’t have one. She was going to have to make this work. This kid was definitely going to get the best bicycle that money could buy, and the most badass Padres’ hat that she could scrounge up. “We making dinner tonight?” He asks, wondering if Lexa was wanting to do the same thing that they had done the previous day and make his mother something to eat for when she gets home.

“No.” Lexa replies, shaking her head. “Your mom said that we could just order in when she gets back.”

“Cool.” He smiles. “We can watch a movie!”

“Anything you want, kid.” She smiles, and can’t help but think how much she smiles around these new people in her life. It’s been good hanging with Finn today. For the most part, it’s helped to keep her mind off of his blonde-haired mother. God. Between last night, and this morning, she’s not sure how she’s still standing. Clarke makes her feel so weak, but so strong and full of life at the same time. It’s an odd feeling. Very odd. She’s never felt that way. Not even with Costia. And Lexa shakes her head for even trying to compare Clarke Griffin with Costia.

 

//

 

Once Clarke returns home from work, Lexa can tell that the blonde is frustrated and tired. She must have had a shitty day at work, and Lexa could all but hope that Clarke’s day improved for her. When Clarke got home, she hugged Finn and asked him about his day with Lexa and Raven, even though Raven stayed in the basement the majority of the time. That was why she was here anyways. He told his mom about the puzzles and games that he and Lexa played, and that Lexa had tried to teach him how to play Texas Hold ‘Em, but it didn’t work out that great. That caused Clarke to laugh a bit, making Lexa’s heart warm and soften inside her chest. Finn bragged to her about how much better his throw was getting and how Lexa had helped him so much. Clarke couldn’t help but look at the brunette with so much adoration in her eyes. The way that Lexa treated and acted around Finn, made Clarke’s chest tighten, and her stomach to flutter. And the way that Finn acted with Lexa… that almost too good to be true. She had never seen him like that with anyone. He was attached to her hip, and Clarke is surprised that Lexa hasn’t gotten tired of him yet. That’s what happens to most people, anyways.

After Finn recapped his and Lexa’s day, Clarke made her way into her bedroom to get ready for her shower, but before she could step into her bathroom, there was a knock at her door. “Come in.” She says, tugging her shirt back on that she almost had completely off before. Her heartrate quicken when she saw green eyes poke through the door. This has gotten to where it happens way too much. It’s getting preposterous.

“Hey – uh” Lexa stutters, trying to ignore the small smile that’s on the blonde’s face when she sees her enter. “I’m sorry to bother you, but what would you like for supper? I can call it in so that it’s here when you get through.”

“Oh – yeah – that’s,” Clarke feels like she’s in fucking high school again with her first crush, and she’s really starting to feel like a damned idiot. Lexa makes her so nervous. It’s unreal. “That’s sweet of you. Is Chinese good for you?”

Lexa nods with a small grin. “Fine with me. Anything specific or just a little bit of everything?”

“A bit of everything is fine, but make sure that there’s some orange chicken in there somewhere.” Clarke smiles.

“Very well.” Lexa teases, and performs an overly-dramatic bow causing Clarke to laugh out loud.

“Dork.”

“You sure you don’t need any help in the shower?” Lexa adds before she steps back out of Clarke’s bedroom. She almost loses herself to her laughter when she sees the look on Clarke’s face at the question. The blonde’s pale face is overcome with a bright red blush, and Lexa thinks that it’s quite possibly the most adorable thing that she’s ever seen. 

“I hate you.” Clarke jokes, sticking her tongue out at the brunette before Lexa winks at her and leaves the room. “Holy shit.” Clarke whispers to herself. This was going to be the hardest thing that she’s ever had to do. Live with Lexa Woods. She definitely couldn’t wait for Octavia to get here to be her buffer. She was surely going to need one. Another thing that she was surely going to need right now… is a cold shower. Really cold.

 

//

 

“Thank you for dinner.” Clarke says to Lexa as they sit down on the couch together like they had to previous night. Clarke had just gotten Finn to bed, and Raven made her way back down into her lair, following some sort of lead that Lincoln and Nyko had sent her. The brunette had paid for dinner, of course, but not for Clarke’s lack of trying.

“You’re very welcome.” Lexa responds, pulling one leg up under her and dangling her other off of the couch. She couldn’t take her eyes off of Clarke, and she was really starting to feel like some sort of creeper, but she honestly couldn’t help herself. It’s like their eyes were like magnets, attracting each other from across rooms and spaces. It’s like Clarke and her bright, blonde hair are the Sun and Lexa is the Earth. She’s made to revolve around Clarke, and enjoys the warmth that she inherits from her proximity to her. “How was your day? You looked exhausted when you got back.”

Clarke shrugs before she pulls both of her legs up onto the couch and she faces Lexa. “It wasn’t the best. My boss – he – uh… he has a thing for me, and sometimes it makes me a bit uncomfortable.” Lexa crinkles her nose at the thought of some asshole making Clarke uncomfortable like that. She can’t help but hope and pray that Clarke doesn’t find her that way. “Dr. Jaha.” Clarke adds. “He and one of the nurses as well.”

“I can see the appeal.” Lexa smirks, and it only grows when she catches Clarke blushing again. “But if they make you uncomfo – he doesn’t – uh – he doesn’t touch you does he?” She probably shouldn’t have asked that, but she couldn’t help it. She will gladly kick someone’s ass for touching Clarke. “I mean, should I go up there and kick someone’s ass?” She tries to act like she’s teasing, but she’s really not.

Clarke chuckles, but her heart also warms at the thought of Lexa thinking about her comfort and safety. “It’s fine. No. He doesn’t touch me. Nothing like that… it just feels awkward a lot of times.”

“I’m sorry.” Lexa responds sincerely.

“Don’t be.” Clarke says, shaking her head. A few moments of silence pass them by, and Clarke thinks that it’s time to tell Lexa about Octavia. “So, I have to tell you something and I – uh – I really hope that you’re not mad at me.” She doesn’t know why she added the last part, but she did, so there it is. Lexa raises a brow, urging Clarke to continue. “Sunday, I’m driving out to Durango to pick up my best friend at the airport.   
She’s flying in from L.A. She always stays with me during Christmas, so that Finn and I aren’t alone.” Lexa nods, thinking to herself. “I just – I didn’t know what you would think about that – you know with you being here and everything. I swear that she won’t say anything to anyone. I trust her with my life. I just wanted you to know beforehand. You can trust her.” Clarke says, after her moment of rambling. “You can trust me.” She adds.

Lexa doesn’t have to think anymore. She does trust Clarke, which she finds extremely weird since she’s only know her a few days. “I do trust you, Clarke, and you don’t have to fill me in on anything. This is your place. Whatever you say, goes.”

Clarke nods with a smile. “Thank you.” She says warmly. “I should probably get to bed. Do you – uh – do you maybe want to go on a walk tomorrow?” Lexa grins at this, but she’s in complete shock that Clarke even thought about asking her. “Finn and I have a trail, through the woods, that we like to walk on on the weekends. It would be nice to have someone new along.”

“I’d love that, Clarke.” Lexa says kindly. “Thank you.”

The blonde nods before standing up. “Goodnight, Lexa.”

“Goodnight, Clarke.” Lexa replies, but before Clarke can get too far down the hallway… “You need me to come tuck you in?” All she hears is a laugh before the blonde’s bedroom door shuts closed. No click of a lock.

Once again, she falls asleep with a smile on her face.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> What did you think? As always, let me know what you thought in the comments below, and I most definitely enjoy kudos!
> 
> Love you all!
> 
> Follow me on Twitter @ asuzh90


	6. In Too Deep

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> What's up, guys? This update is a little bit shorter than the others, but I will try my hardest to have another out within the next few days. We finally meet Octavia in this chapter for a bit. Things are a little tense, to say the least. :)

“Okay.” Clarke exhaled, walking slowly and rubbing her hands together to create some form of warmth. She, Finn, and Lexa were out walking through the woods on a trail that she and Finn had sort of created over the past year or so, and the weather was freezing, to say the least. “I was not fully prepared for the weather today.” The blonde says honestly, causing Lexa to chuckle. “What? I wasn’t expecting it to be this cold.   
This is insane.” Clarke throws Lexa a faux glare, only causing Lexa to chuckle more.

Clarke notices the brunette start removing her outer jacket. “Here.” Lexa says, getting behind Clarke and holding her jacket out for Clarke to stick her arms through.

“What? No.” Clarke replies warmly. “It’s freezing, Lexa, and you’ll get sick. I’m not taking your jacket.”

“Clarke, I’m fine. I still have plenty of layers on.” The brunette says, tilting her head to the side a bit and looking at Clarke’s red face. It’s obvious that the blonde is indeed cold, just from her wind-chilled face alone. Lexa raises an eyebrow, indicating that she’s not taking ‘no’ for an answer. Clarke finally rolls her eyes, and accepts the coat from her new housemate. She tries to ignore the feeling of Lexa’s fingers brushing her arms as she helps Clarke slip the jacket on. Even through all of that clothing, the brunette’s touch is something else entirely.

“Thank you.” Clarke responds softly, once Lexa has helped her slide the coat on over all of the blonde’s layers. “You didn’t have to do that.”

Lexa shrugs. “You didn’t have to do a lot of things either, Ms. Griffin, but you did them anyways.” The brunette glances out of the side of her eye to look of at Clarke, as they walk down the trail with Finn a good distance in front of them. “And for that, I’m eternally grateful for you.”

“Eternally, huh?” The blonde jokes, causing Lexa to roll her eyes. “And you have to stop calling me ‘Ms. Griffin’. It makes me feel ancient.”

“Okay.” Lexa says softly, looking down at her feet while she walks. “Clarke.” The blonde notices a small smirk on Lexa’s face, and it’s almost as if she knows what the sound of her saying Clarke’s name does to the blonde. It’s crazy. Never, in her life, has someone saying her name ever turned her on as much as Lexa saying it does. Clarke realizes that it’s ridiculous. The fact that something as simple as a verbal name would   
do something like that to a person. She never would have ever thought that something like that was possible. At least until she met Lexa.

“What time will your friend’s flight land tomorrow?” Lexa asks, breaking Clarke out of her thoughts. Thank God. They were beginning to go somewhere where they absolutely shouldn’t.

“Around noon, I think.” Clarke answers. “So I should probably leave here a little bit after ten in the morning.”

“Is there – uh – I mean, is there anything that I should know?” Lexa asks cautiously, causing Clarke to stop in her walk beside Lexa. The blonde looks at Lexa, searching for something in her emerald eyes, anything…   
something that will give her away and what she’s thinking about. “About – Octavia, I mean.”

A small smirk forms on Clarke’s face as she realizes something. Her blue eyes search over every facial feature and emotion that Lexa has to offer. “You’re nervous.”

“Wh - what?” Lexa practically stutters out, and Clarke knows that she’s hit the jackpot when she sees how red the brunette has turned. She knows that it’s not from the chill either. 

“You’re nervous about meeting Octavia.” Clarke repeats herself. 

Lexa closes her eyes for a second or two before reopening them and seeing the worried expression on Clarke’s face. “I guess I am.” The brunette answers truthfully. “I’m just – I mean if it were my best friend, and she was doing something for someone like you’ve been doing for me… I would be furious probably.” Lexa notices a slight raise in Clarke’s brown, silently asking what she’s talking about. “What you did, Clarke… it was stupid.” There… she finally said it. She’s most definitely thankful that she was able to meet Clarke and Finn, but what if Lexa really would have been dangerous. There’s no way in hell that Clarke could have known about the fact that Lexa was truthfully innocent.

“I know.” Clarke utters, looking down at her feet. “I know it. God, but you’re – I mean – you’re innocent.”

“You didn’t know that.” Lexa responds, but not without thinking about how wonderful it sounded to have someone like Clarke Griffin saying those two words. ‘You’re innocent.’

“Maybe I did.” Clarke replies with a shrug, as if she were trying to defend the stupidity of her actions. “Maybe there was something about you that I just knew that you were being honest about everything.”

“There’s no way that you could have known, Clarke.” Lexa answers a little harshly. “The fact is, that I’m a bit nervous about meeting your friend, but I will take whatever she says to me to heart.”

“Don’t.” Clarke warns, causing green eyes to shoot back up to meet her own. “Octavia – she can be – a bitch. I love her, but she can.” The blonde chuckles a bit, causing a small grin to form on Lexa’s face. “But don’t let anything she says to you change anything. Okay?”

“If she tells me to leave, Clarke… I will leave.”

“No.” The blonde practically orders. “You will not. I want y – you are allowed to be here. I told you that. We are going to figure out have to get your aunt back, and we can do that here.” Clarke prays to whatever deity is up above her, that Lexa didn’t catch her near slip up.

“I’m not dragging you and Finn any further into this than I already have.”

“That’s enough of this.” Clarke argues. “You will do as I say and not let Octavia get to you. Got it?” Lexa doesn’t know whether to be terrified or to be amused that Clarke is taking up for her like this. She feels as if she’s in some sort of Twilight Zone, and she’s not one-hundred percent sure that she wants to leave it.

 

//

 

Their Saturday was rather uneventful, besides the conversation between Lexa and Clarke about Octavia. Lexa and Finn showed Clarke everything that Finn had improved on that week, and they even tried to help Clarke with her throwing. They were going to need a little more time for that. There was tons of new material for Finn and Lexa to use to pick on Clarke, and Lexa doesn’t remember the last time that she laughed as hard as she did when Finn mimicked his mother’s throwing. They ordered pizza in for dinner and, of course, Lexa beat Clarke to the punch to pay.

After dinner, Clarke and Finn went to hang out in his room for a while to put together some puzzles and build some new buildings with his Legos. Clarke felt as if she hadn’t spent enough time with her son this week, and decided to spend a couple of hours with him before bedtime.

“Here.” Raven said, as she plopped down beside Lexa on the sofa and handed her a laptop. “What did you need this for?”

“Christmas shopping.” Was all that Lexa replied with, knowing that her best friend did not approve of her becoming so close with Finn and Clarke. She knew that if she said she was Christmas shopping for Finn and his mother, that Raven would have more than a few choice words with her, and she really wanted to avoid that as much as possible.

“Christmas shopping? You never Christmas shop.” Raven replied, turning in her seated position to face Lexa on the couch. “You always just give me money.”

“And that’s what I’m going to do this year, as well.”

“Then who the hell are you shop –“ All of a sudden, as if she answered her question herself before she even really finished it, Raven’s eyes shot open wide when she realized. “Shit, Woods. You can’t.”

“Can’t what, exactly, Raven?”

Raven huffs out loud, knowing full well that Lexa knows what she’s talking about. She just likes playing dumb, clearly. “You know damn well what I’m talking about.” Her best friend answers a little louder than Lexa would have like for her to. Earning Raven a shush from Lexa so that Clarke and Finn didn’t hear them arguing. By this time, Lexa has a search bar opened on Raven’s laptop, typing ‘top rated kid’s bikes’ into the engine. “You can’t do this, Lexa.” The shorter brunette starts in again. “It isn’t fair to the kid. He’s going to get all attached to you and shit, and then soon… you’re going to leave. You won’t see them again. You have to stop this crazy shit. This isn’t you. You don’t get hung up on women. Especially women with kids.” Her best friend continues. 

“How do you know who I am, Raven? You haven’t seen me in ten years.” Lexa snaps. “Maybe this is who I am now. Maybe I don’t want to go out and party and spend every night with a different girl. Maybe things are different.” Her voice is still raised, and she really hopes that she didn’t let her emotions get the better of her so that Clarke and Finn could hear her through the walls. “Look,” Lexa starts in again, after she sees the hurt look on her best friend’s face for raising her voice to her. “I understand what you’re saying, Raven. I do. But… Clarke is different. Finn is different. I don’t – I’m no – I don’t have feelings for Clarke.” The taller woman finally manages to get out and Raven can tell that Lexa, clearly, isn’t believing her own words. Lexa seems to be trying to convince herself that she doesn’t have feelings for her blonde savior. 

“Then what exactly are you doing, Woods? Because it sure as hell looks like you are trying your hardest to turn nothing into something.” Raven says firmly. “This isn’t a time when you can just pretend and play ‘house’. These are real people, with real feelings. You’re going to hurt them.”

“How about you let me handle this, Raven?” Lexa says through gritted teeth. “And you go downstairs and do what I hired you to do.” Lexa knows that it was a harsh thing to say. She knows that Raven is way more than some person that she hired. She’s her best friend and she’s just trying to help. She’s just so sick of people telling her what she can and can’t do. She’s had enough. If Lexa wants to get the kid and his mom something for Christmas, then she will damn well get them something for Christmas. No one is going to try and make her feel bad about doing a good deed such as this.

Raven gets up from her position on the couch and leaves Lexa there alone. She goes back down to her ‘lair’ where she stays the rest of the night. After another thirty minutes or so, the couch beside Lexa dips, and she looks over to see blue looking back at her. “Clarke.” Lexa says, before looking back to her lap at the small computer that she still has there.

“What are you doing?”

“Christmas shopping.” Lexa answers again, and she really hopes that Clarke doesn’t give her the same damn speech that Raven just gave to her. She doesn’t think that she can sit through that again. Lexa doesn’t look back up to Clarke. She can’t. She’s already frustrated enough with her best friend. Clarke’s eyes looking at her intently, would only make matters worse, she feels. “Did Finn go to sleep?”  
Clarke nods her head before she realizes that Lexa isn’t looking at her. She can tell that something is wrong with the brunette, but she knows that it’s not her place to ask. “He did.” The blonde answers. “Thank you for being so great with him this week.” She adds, trying to cheer her new housemate up a bit.

“I didn’t do anything.” The brunette replied, but then realized what an asshole she sounded like. She looked up, bringing her green eyes to meet cerulean ones. “I’m sorry. It was my pleasure to hang out with him, but really… I didn’t do anything. Just hung out with him.”

“Is something wrong?” And there it is. Clarke blurted out before she could stop herself. 

“No.” Lexa answered shortly. “Nothing. Just trying to figure out what sort of bicycle Finn might like.”

“Finn?” Clarke asks surprisingly. She moved over closer to Lexa, absentmindedly, to look down at the computer screen. “You’re getting Finn a bike?”  
Lexa nods in response. “For Christmas.”

“Lexa, you don’t have to do that.”

“I want to.” She replies, still not looking back up to Clarke. “He’s great, and he told me that he wouldn’t mind having a bike…” She shrugs. “I’m going to make it happen.”

To Lexa’s surprise, Clarke doesn’t argue with her like she thought that she would. The blonde only smiles at her, causing Lexa to smile back. “You know… I bought him a new Playstation for this year.” Clarke says.   
This causes Lexa’s eyebrows to shoot up.

“You did? That’s great, Clarke.” The brunette replies. “I didn’t realize that they made Playstations still.”

The blonde beside her can’t hold back her laughter at the statement. “Lexa. This is the Playstation 4.”

“Holy shit.” Lexa chuckles when she realizes why Clarke can’t stop laughing. “Four? That’s insane. I have missed a lot, haven’t I?” The two women laugh for a couple of more minutes, and in that time, Clarke seems to have found herself a lot closer to Lexa on the sofa. One of her hands is grasping onto Lexa’s forearm, and her other is gripping the brunette’s shoulder. The two continue to laugh until Lexa must realize their closeness, and she looks at Clarke out of the corner of her eye. Clarke notices then too.

“Shit.” The blonde mutters, letting go with both hands and moving back a little bit. Her heartrate has picked up and she can’t seem to get her breathing under control. She’s realized that this happens all too often when she’s with Lexa. It’s getting insane. “I’m sorry.” She tries to chuckle, to throw off her own awkwardness. “I’m a bit of a cuddler. If I ever get too close to someone, I will probably latch on.” She jokes, causing Lexa to grin in quite possibly the sexiest way ever.

Lexa seems to think of something, and tries to think if she should say it or not. She decides that she should. “Well, if it’s any consolation,” The brunette says, leaning a little closer to Clarke, and the blonde is sure that she sees Lexa’s eyes glance down to her own lips. She feels her own breath hitch again. “I’d cuddle the fuck out of you.”

Holy shit. Clarke thinks to herself. She doesn’t know how she’s kept herself from jumping Lexa’s bones right there and then. This is ridiculous. She’s never met someone with so much sex appeal, that they could turn something so innocent into something… well… not so innocent. She is sure that Lexa just caught the way that she tried to swallow the large dry lump that just formed in her throat, but she can’t bring herself to care right now, because all that she can think about, is the fact that Lexa fucking Woods just told her that she’d ‘cuddle the fuck’ out of her.

“You okay over there, Griffin?” The brunette teases, looking back down at the computer in her lap.

“I’m just fine, smartass.” Clarke responds, sticking her tongue out in the process. Lexa chuckles and continues her shopping with Clarke watching over her shoulder. She doesn’t miss when Lexa ‘checks out’ on some kid’s website and her total is almost a thousand dollars. She chooses not to say anything though, because she really doesn’t feel like getting into it with Lexa right now.

“Okay…” The brunette says, stretching her arms above her head. “I think that I’m done with Finn’s. Now it’s your turn. What do you want Santa to bring you, Clarke?” Lexa teases, and all that Clarke can think about is ‘If he would just bring me you, I’d be fine.’

“No.” Clarke manages to say. “You’re not getting me anything.”

“The hell I’m not.” Lexa responds, looking up to the blonde. “If you won’t tell me, then I will just have to pick it out on my own.”

“Then I guess that’s what you’ll be doing, because I’m not telling you anything that I want.” She finds it strange that the brunette is so dead set on buying her things all of the time. 

“Fine.” Lexa says, looking back down at her computer and moving a bit closer to Clarke again. “At least look through these sights with me, that way I can tell what things you actually like.”

“Fine.” Clarke replies, rolling her eyes, but she can’t suppress the grin that forms when Lexa rolls her eyes.

After an hour or so of fussing and bickering about what to get Clarke for Christmas, Lexa felt a head fall over onto her shoulder, and not pick itself back up. The brunette is sure that her heartbeat would give her away if she hadn’t just realized that Clarke had, indeed, fallen asleep. Lexa was overwhelmed with the sweet, fresh smell of Clarke’s shampoo, and the warmth of the blonde’s cheek pressed against her shoulder and Clarke’s thigh pressed against her own. Her body seemed as though it was betraying her in some way. She was not supposed to feel this way about Clarke. Not in the least bit. She knew, in the back of her mind, that what Raven had said to her earlier was true. It wasn’t fair to Clarke and Finn for Lexa to get close to them like this. Not when she would just be leaving soon, and possibly never see them again.

Lexa sits there for a few more minutes while taking in Clarke’s sleeping presence. Her mind is running a hundred miles per hour, and her heart isn’t too far behind it. It’s hard to imagine that Lexa has only known this sleeping blonde for just going on five days now. It’s crazy really, and never where she would have thought herself to be when she escaped the prison all of those days ago. She feels as if she’s known Clarke for years. They fight and argue about a lot of things, but they also laugh and talk about everything under the sun. And Finn… well, Lexa completely adores the boy. She’s never been one for kids, but this one is a different story.

She feels Clarke shake a bit, and realizes that the blonde is cold. Lexa decides that it’s time that both headed to bed anyways, since Clarke has to get up in the morning to drive and get Octavia in Durango. Lexa turns slightly, positioning herself so that she can put one arm behind Clarke’s back and the other under the sleeping blonde’s legs. She thanks her lucky stars that she’s kept up with her fitness for all of these years, when she goes to stand from the couch while lifting Clarke. Not that Clarke was heavy, but it was a tough position to be in.

Luckily, she managed to stand without waking the blonde. Now, Clarke seems to nuzzle further into Lexa’s neck and brings her arm up to wrap around said neck. Lexa is sure that her breathing is erratic right now. She knows that it is. There’s no way that it couldn’t be. Slowly, she makes her way down the hallway, trying to ignore the warm breath brushing against her sensitive skin on her neck.

Once she enters Clarke’s bedroom, she moves over towards the bed. Lexa leans over and gently lays the blonde-headed woman down there and pulls the covers up and over her, tucking her in slightly. She knows that she should leave then, but she can’t bring herself to look away. This girl – this woman lying here in front of her, has, literally, changed her life in more ways than one in less than a week. She’s beautiful. She’s smart. She’s real. She’s infuriating. She’s stubborn. Lexa chuckles quietly. All of those things are true, yet she wouldn’t change a single one of them, because those are what make Clarke Clarke.

Lexa can’t help but wish that this was another time. A time when her life wasn’t hanging in the balance, and she was able to feel the things that she’s feeling for the blonde and her son. “You’re staring.” A voice utters suddenly, breaking her from her thoughts and causing her to jump a bit. She chuckles when she realizes that she’s been caught like she’s caught Clarke several times now.

“Go to sleep, Clarke.”

The blonde chuckles then too, knowing that she finally caught Lexa staring at her like she always stares at the brunette. “Thank you for bringing me to bed.” She says, stretching, in a groggy voice. “You should have just woken me up.”

“And miss the chance to carry a beautiful woman to bed?” Lexa teases. “You’re welcome, Clarke.”

“You could stay, you know?” Clarke says, once Lexa finally turns around to head out the door. “In here, I mean. My bed is plenty big enough – and I noticed that the couch is far too short for your legs.” Clarke knows that she’s probably crossing at least three lines here, and she also knows that she’s being a damned idiot, and if Octavia could hear her now, she would chew her ass out.

Lexa turns around then, and slowly walks back over to Clarke’s side of the bed. “Thanks for the offer, Blondie.” Lexa grins. “But, I think that I should probably stay in the living room. Raven already says that I’m getting too close to you and Finn as it is. I think that she would definitely throw a hissy fit if she found out that I stayed in your room.” The brunette doesn’t know why she was just so blatantly honest, but it’s already out and she can’t change that.

“Do you always do what Raven says?” Clarke asks as she pulls the covers up tighter under her chin.  
Lexa chuckles. “No, but she’s right.” Clarke raises a brow, causing Lexa to continue. “I should really distance myself from the two of you. I don’t want yo – Finn to be upset when I have to leave.”

“I think that it’s a little late for distancing yourself, Lexa.” The blonde states matter-of-factly. 

Lexa smirks not knowing exactly what that’s supposed to mean. “Goodnight, Clarke.” She says, leaning down and boldly placing a soft kiss to Clarke’s forehead. She doesn’t notice the fact that Clarke closes her eyes at the warmth and softness of Lexa’s lips, or the way that Clarke’s heartrate speeds up immensely. She can only make herself lean back up and walk out of the room before Clarke even has a chance to respond.

‘Fuck.’ Clarke thinks to herself. ‘I’m in way too deep.’

 

//

 

The next morning, when Clarke enters the living area, dressed and ready to leave, she finds Lexa in the kitchen. The aroma filling the air around her is heavenly and homey. She smells coffee and sausage, and wonders how long Lexa has been up cooking. “Good morning.” Clarke says, grinning when Lexa jumps from surprise. 

The brunette brings a hand up to her chest and forces herself to smile through her fear. “Morning, Clarke. Did you sleep well?”

“I did.” The blonde smiles, brightening the room and Lexa’s heart all in one. “Did you? How long have you been up?” She is curious as to how long Lexa has been up. Clarke can’t help but notice how tired Lexa looks, the brunette even has a few bags under her eyes. When an answer doesn’t come verbally, Clarke already knows that she has her answer. “You didn’t sleep, did you?” She hears an audible sigh come from the brunette as she pulls something out of the oven, before she shakes her head ‘no’.

“Just couldn’t sleep.” Lexa responds, sliding about a dozen biscuits off of a cookie sheet into a bread basket. “Hungry?” She asks the blonde, hoping that Clarke doesn’t push an answer out of her, but of course, she has no such luck.

“I told you not to worry about it.” Clarke somehow says firmly and softly all at the same time. 

“What?”

“I told you,” Clarke starts replying as she walks closer to Lexa, until she’s right behind her. “Not to worry about Octavia.” She says, knowing full well that that is why Lexa didn’t sleep. She could see how uptight and nervous Lexa had been the whole previous day about their new, upcoming guest. She hates that Lexa feels that way. Three days ago, she wouldn’t have really cared if Lexa was uncomfortable about Octavia being here or not, but now… now it’s a whole different ballgame. Her and Lexa’s ‘relationship’ has grown in the past couple of days, and she knows how real and genuine a person the brunette is. She’s had too much shit gone wrong in her life, and she only needs friends. That’s not asking for much. Clarke respects her. She really does, and she won’t let Lexa feel this way. “Or Raven.” Clarke adds for good measure.

At this, Lexa finally turns around to face the blonde. It startles her how close Clarke is standing to her. Clearly, Clarke has no qualms with personal space anymore. Not that Lexa’s really complaining, it just makes things a lot harder and a lot more complicated in the feelings (that she shouldn’t have) department. “I – I’m sorry, Clarke… I just – I can’t help but be nervous. This isn’t me. I’m never like this, but I’ve also never escaped from prison and practically forced a stranger to let me live at their house. People have a right to be mad at me. Your friend included. And I can’t forget you… you have more right than anyone to be angry with me.” She takes a breath, suddenly realizing that it’s oh so much harder to breathe with Clarke standing so close to her. “Raven is right… I need to stop this. I can’t stay here and pretend to be friends with you and Finn. It’s not right.”

“Stop.” Clarke says resolutely. “Just stop. I’m not angry with you, and I’m the one that forced you to stay here, remember? Give me some credit.” The blonde grins, trying to break some of the tension in the air. “Raven isn’t right, either. Me, you, Finn… even Raven… we can all be friends, and after all of this is over,” She says, using her hand to gesture around to nothing in particular. “We can still be friends, and I’ll be a better person just for knowing you.” Clarke has to admit to herself that calling she and Lexa ‘friends’ makes her feel a little uneasy. She can’t quite put her finger on it, but it’s weird. Different. Sure… Lexa is attractive. That’s a given. Anyone with eyes can see that, but being anything but friends with the brunette is preposterous and will definitely never ever happen. “I have to leave now if I want to make it to the airport on time.” She says, finally. “Are you okay?”

Lexa looks embarrassed, and she is. She can’t believe that she’s been so weak and nervous about meeting Octavia. Her conscious is killing her from the inside out, and it’s turning her into an emotional wreck. It absolutely has nothing to do with the pretty blonde woman standing in front of her and saying things like, ‘I’ll be a better person for knowing you.’ Lexa is finally able to settle her breathing, and calm her mind when Clarke says that she has to leave. “I’ll be fine.” The brunette answers with a smile. “Let me walk you out.” She does so, following Clarke out to the car and opening the door for her. She doesn’t know why, really, that she’s walking her a whole thirty feet to her car, but she’s already there. 

“Thank you.” Clarke says when Lexa opens the door for her and she settles comfortably into the driver’s seat. She quirks an eyebrow up at Lexa and grins. “So, will you be here when I get back?”

Lexa sticks her tongue out at Clarke for her teasing. “Maybe.” She jokes back before shutting the door, but before she can walk off, Clarke rolls the window down.

“Come here.” Clarke says firmly causing Lexa to chuckle, but also wonder what the blonde wants. Lexa squats down and plants her arms on the window of the car.

“What, Griffin?” She asks, trying to hide her smile. She can’t help how being around Clarke makes her want to be goofy and a little immature at times. “I’ve got to –“ Lexa’s words are cut off when Clarke leans forward and quickly places a kiss to Lexa’s cheek. It didn’t linger long at all. In fact, one might find it just a friendly kiss on the cheek, which it probably was, but Lexa couldn’t help but try and look further into it. 

See it for something else. Her eyes must have widened and her face must have turned a few different shades of red because Clarke’s gorgeous smile only grew.

“Thought that I owed you one.” Clarke shrugs her shoulders before she starts rolling the window up with Lexa’s arms still lying there. Lexa quickly stands and takes her arms with her. Clarke winks at her, and before the window is all the way up she says. “Take care of my baby boy.”

Clarke drives off that morning to pick up her best friend at the airport, leaving a very confused and flustered Lexa behind in the driveway.

 

//

 

Two hours later, Clarke is waiting in a small airport lobby in Durango. Octavia’s flight had been delayed a few minutes, but nothing too terrible, so the blonde found herself sitting at a restaurant, nursing a glass of water while she waited on her friend. As Clarke sits there, in the crowded café, within the airport, she finds herself looking back and forth between three different television screens. One of them happens to be on a national news channel, and after a few minutes, an all too familiar face pops up on the screen. It’s Lexa, and Clarke can’t bring herself to look away. She knows that whatever the media is saying, about her new housemate, is wrong and out of context, but she just can’t help but wonder what they’re saying about her now.

At home, she’s tried very hard to keep the television off of any form of news outlet. One, because she doesn’t want Lexa to have to see it, and two, because Finn doesn’t need to see it either. If her son were to recognize the face that keeps flashing on the screen with the words ‘murderer’ and ‘escaped’ running across the bottom, then that would break his heart. She couldn’t allow that to happen. 

“Can’t believe that they let her get away.” A familiar voice says from behind her. Clarke turns around to see her short, black-haired best friend standing at the bar beside her, dropping her bag as she opens her arms up for Clarke to give her a hug. Clarke’s smile widens and she immediately gives in and accepts the embrace from Octavia. “You look good, Griff.” Octavia says while she squeezes Clarke tightly. She pulls away and smiles again at her friend. “It’s been a while.”

Clarke nods in agreement. “It has. Thanks for coming on such short notice. I know that you had a lot to –“

“Shut it, Clarke. Anything for you and little Finn.” Octavia smiles. “Speaking of… where is Finn? I thought that he’d be with you. He at Mrs. Caldwell’s?”

Clarke freezes at the question. She should have prepared herself better for the questions that she would get from Octavia, but honestly, she hadn’t expected something to throw her off straight away. “He’s with the babysitter.” Clarke says, feeling a little bit better, because it’s not exactly a lie. Finn is with the babysitter, but the babysitter is most definitely not a seventy-year-old widow living three miles down the road from her house. “You ready to go?” Clarke asks nervously once she notices Octavia glaring at the television screen. Her friend seems to be entranced.

“Are you seeing this?” Octavia says, pointing up at the screen above them. “Ridiculous. That picture that they ‘found’ of this Woods chick at LaGuardia the other day is a fake. Bitch probably planted it so that she could run the opposite way.” Octavia groans, and Clarke’s stomach sinks further into her abdomen. “Clearly she has someone helping her. Our law enforcement is a laughing stock.”

“Ready to go?” Clarke repeats herself, hoping to get Octavia to stop talking about it for a few minutes so that she can regain her composure for the sure to be awkward car ride back home.

“Yeah, yeah.” Octavia mutters, finally tearing her eyes from the screen and grabbing her bag. “Let’s get out of here. I’m ready to see my favorite little man.”

Once the two friends were in the car, and making their way out of the parking lot of the airport, the two of them start with lighter conversation. Talking about how Octavia’s business is doing and if Clarke is still liking her receptionist job; they talk about Finn’s upcoming first year of school, and the gifts that they’ve both gotten for him as well. Once Clarke has driven a good half-hour, she decides that now’s as good a time as any to break the news to her best friend.

“So,” Clarke starts in, feeling her heart beating erratically in her chest. “I know that you’ve seen the news over the past few days talking about Le – Alexandria Woods escaping from prison.” The blonde almost slipped up with the name, but luckily, she caught herself and Octavia didn’t seem to notice. 

“God, yes. That’s all that any of the news stations have been talking about. Los Angeles is on some sort of lockdown. They expect her to come back there. That’s where she’s from. Where her parents’ company hub is located.” Octavia answers, and damn it, Clarke realizes that her friend knows more than she was hoping that she would about Lexa’s case. “In my opinion, they’re stupid for thinking that she’s dumb enough to go back there, at least right away.” Octavia says, earning a small chuckle from Clarke. Octavia raises an eyebrow at her best friend, but doesn’t question her. Clarke finds it hilarious that because Lexa is anything but dumb over this type of stuff. Especially with Raven by her side. “I’m surprised that that Nia woman didn’t try and have Alexandria sent to Texas for the death penalty. I would have. What that girl did to Nia’s brother and his wife… that was just awful.”

Octavia doesn’t notice the frantic breathing coming from Clarke beside her, but she does notice how her friend’s hands grip onto the steering wheel tighter until her knuckles turn white. “Yo, Clarke. What’s wrong with you?”

The blonde doesn’t answer for a few seconds. She feels as if she’s on the verge of tears with all of the emotions running through her body right this moment. Clarke couldn’t imagine Lexa receiving the death penalty. The thought makes her heart hurt, and she feels as if her lungs are shutting down on her. She can’t let it affect her though. Not now. She has to make it through this conversation in one piece, and the by the way that Octavia is already talking about her opinions on Lexa… well, it’s not looking that promising.

“Clarke?”

“I um – you know how she was at the prison not too far from Silverton?” Clarke is more than a little nervous. She’s feels on the cusps of a panic attack, and she doesn’t know how to fight it off. This conversation is a hard one to have. That’s for damn sure. 

“Yeah.” Octavia answers. “It’s hard to believe that she could have been so close to you and Finn when she escaped. Hopefully, she’s long gone from your area. I wish that they would put a high-risk prison like that somewhere far away from civilization, so that if one of the crazies does get out… then at least they can’t hurt someone right away.”

“Octavia…” Clarke says, and it definitely comes across as firm, and as a warning.

“What, Clarke? You’re being really weird. Why are we talking about Alexandria Woods anyways?”

“It’s Lexa.” The blonde says quietly. So quietly, that Octavia almost misses it. Almost.

“What?”

“Her name.” Clarke says, taking a deep, steadying breath to muster up some more courage. “It’s Lexa.”

“O – okay? And… how the hell do you know that, Griff?”

Here it is. Game time. Show time. Whatever it is… it’s here, and Clarke’s never been more nervous in her entire life. This was it. All or nothing. Telling Octavia this… this puts Lexa into so much more danger, but Clarke trusts her friend… she just doesn’t trust her to not make an ass of herself. “Because she’s living with me.”

Silence.

Lots and lots of silence.

More silence.

And then laughter.

“You’re too funny, Clarke.” Octavia chuckles. “That was one of the most random jokes that I think that you’ve ever pulled.”

Clarke let’s out a long sigh. Of course she would think that this is a joke. A really stupid ass joke. “It’s not a joke, O.” Clarke replies with a small shake of her head. “She ran up on my house. After she escaped.” 

Clarke decides pull the car over on the side of the road. She needs a minute to compose herself. She can see how oddly Octavia is looking at her out of the corner of her eye. “I allowed her to stay. She’s innocent. She’s working on proving it.”

“From your house?” Octavia chuckles. “Yeah, yeah, Griff. You’ll have to do better than that. I mean… this is you we’re talking about.”

Clarke sighs immediately and brings a hand to rubs over her face. She wishes that Lexa were with her now. It’s a weird feeling, but somehow, someway, Lexa makes her feel confident and nervous all at once. She doesn’t know how to explain it. Lexa’s presence is a stronghold for Clarke’s nerves. 

Clarke looks back over to her friend in the passenger seat, and sees that Octavia is still grinning weirdly. The blonde let’s out a groan before reaching for her cell phone. “What are you doing?” Octavia asks.

“Texting Lexa.”

“Oh, so she has a cell phone and you have her number?” Octavia teases. 

“I’m going to have her Facetime me… so that you will actually believe me and stop with this ‘joke’ nonsense.” Clarke replies, and she has to admit that Octavia is already getting on her nerves about the whole thing. She didn’t expect her friend to be so simple minded about this type thing. Usually Octavia is one to give everyone a chance. Clarke can only hope that her friend gives Lexa a chance.

 

CLARKE (1:33PM) – I need you to Facetime with me.

 

The response from her housemate is almost immediate.

 

LEXA (1:34PM) – What? Why? Are you okay? Aren’t you with Octavia?

 

Clarke chuckles at Lexa’s reply, and she can’t help the way that her heat melts slightly at how Lexa was worried about her a bit. Or so it seems.

“What are you laughing about?” Octavia asks.

“Lexa.” Clarke grins and doesn’t see her friend roll her eyes. “She’s worried about me.”

“Yeah, well, that’s one thing that me and your new imaginary friend have in common.” Octavia replies. “Seriously, Clarke? What the hell?”

Clarke ignore her friend before she can literally reach over and slap her. Her phone buzzes again before she can reply.

 

LEXA (1:36PM) – Clarke? Do I need to come get you?

CLARKE (1:36PM) – I’m fine, Lexa. Octavia doesn’t believe me. I need her to see you.

LEXA (1:37PM) – Can you get alone for a second?

CLARKE (1:38PM) – Yes.

 

A few seconds later, after Octavia gives Clarke yet another stink-eye, Clarke’s Facetime starts to ring. “I’m going to answer this outside real quick, okay?” Clarke asks.

“Yeah, yeah.” Octavia replies with the wave of her hand, causing Clarke to roll her eyes before getting out of the vehicle on the side of the road.

“Hi.” Clarke says with a small smile when she slides her phone open, revealing Lexa’s gorgeously sculpted face.

“Hey.” Lexa replies. “I uh – I’m really –“ The brunette is rubbing the back of her neck with one of her hands while the other holds the phone. 

“Nervous?” Clarke asks, earning a nod from Lexa. “Don’t be. Just be yourself. She doesn’t believe me. That’s why I asked you to call me, okay?”

“Okay.” Lexa breathes. 

“Ready?”

“As I’ll ever be.”

Clarke gets back into the car, but before she hands the phone to Octavia, she puts it on mute so that Lexa can’t hear what she’s saying. “I swear to God, Octavia, if you act like a complete asshole, I will turn this car around and drop your skinny ass back off at the airport. You understand?”

Octavia laughs. “Yes, mother. Now, let’s see your new housemate, shall we?” She adds teasingly, clearly still not believing anything that Clarke says.

Clarke nods before turning the mute back off and handing the phone to her friend. She doesn’t realize that she’s been holding a breath, not until she unleashes it. She sees her friend bring the small phone up in front of her face, and she immediately sees the girl’s mouth drop wide open. “Hello, Octavia.” Clarke smiles when she hears Lexa’s voice, and tries to ignore the feelings that she gets from it.

Octavia looks back over to Clarke, who now has a smug look on her face, before she looks back to the cellphone. “What the fuck? Clarke? You – I – She’s –“

“My name is Lexa Woods.” The brunette says quietly, but confidently, and Clarke once again ignores the feelings that Lexa’s voice gives her down in the pit of her stomach. “And everything that you’ve heard about me is a lie.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> What did you guys think? Let me know in the comments below! Love you all!
> 
> Follow me on Twitter @asuzh90


	7. You Can't Avoid This

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello, guys! I hope that everyone's week started off okay. Hopefully, this update will be worthwhile. I hope that you guys like it!

“My name is Lexa Woods.” The brunette says quietly, but confidently, and Clarke once again ignores the feelings that Lexa’s voice gives her down in the pit of her stomach. “And everything that you’ve heard about me is a lie.”

 

//

 

Almost immediately, after Lexa had started to speak, Octavia hung up the phone and practically threw it back into Clarke’s lap.   
Octavia was pissed. More so than Clarke had ever seen her before, and it was more than a little bit intimidating, but Clarke refused to back down. Standing up for Lexa… that’s what’s right. Clarke started driving again, once she realized that Octavia   
wasn’t going to say anything, at least not right away.

The drive seemed so much longer in sheer silence. Awkward silence at that. Five minutes ago, they had already passed back through Silverton, so they were only around ten minutes from Clarke’s house. Each second that they inched closer, Clarke’s heartbeat sped up, and her breathing quickened. She couldn’t handle it anymore. She couldn’t handle the silence, and something had to be said between the two of them before they arrived back home. 

“Octavia…”

“Don’t.” The shorter woman said starkly, interrupting whatever Clarke was going to say. “I can’t believe you, Clarke.” 

“You don’t even know what’s going on!” Clarke snaps back. She can see her house in the not too far off distance. “You won’t   
even let me –“

“I do know what’s going on!” Octavia snaps back. “You’re being taken advantage of. You have a fucking criminal living in your house, Clarke! In your house, where your five-year-old son sleeps! What did she threaten to do to you? I don’t care who she is, I will kick her ass, and then send said ass back to prison.” Octavia’s voice was so fierce and strong, that Clarke hardly recognized her. She’d never seen her best friend like this, and she won’t even let Clarke get a word in edge-wise.

Slowly, Clarke pulls the car up to the house, and before she even has the car in park, Octavia practically jumps out of the passenger side door and briskly walks through the front door. “Shit.” Clarke mutters, putting the vehicle in park and unbuckling her seat belt. Sprinting, she makes her way to the front door, and when she opens it, she notices Raven at the end of the hallways, leading Finn back down into the basement. 

Shit.

Octavia has just laid her eyes on Lexa, who is sitting on the couch, and makes her way over. Clarke isn’t far behind. “Woods!”   
Octavia exclaims, raising her voice to an octave that Clarke didn’t know was possible for her friend. Clearly, Lexa is startled, because she immediately stands up and awkwardly let’s her arms hang by her sides. Her green eyes are wide and extremely anxious. The short, black-haired girl walks up to the taller woman and uses both hands to push at her chest, causing Lexa to fall backwards a bit. 

All of a sudden, Clarke is terrified. She knows that Lexa could most definitely kick Octavia’s ass, but even more terrifying, she knows that she won’t. She’ll take whatever Octavia gives her, because that’s just the type of person that Lexa is. It’s weird that Clarke already knows that. She hasn’t even known the woman a week.

“Octavia! Stop!” Clarke yells, hoping and praying the entire time that Finn can’t hear all of this from down in the basement. Her best friend ignores her. Clarke expects nothing less.

“What the fuck do you think that you’re doing here?” Octavia hisses, pointing a finger directly into Lexa’s face. Her short stature seems to disappear; overwhelmed by the sheer amount of intimidation rolling off of her. “Why are you here? What did you threaten her with? She’s got a fucking kid!” Octavia is practically shouting now, and Clarke’s certain that her heart has beat a permanent tattoo against the inside of her chest. “Is that what you threatened her with? With her son? I swear to God if you have touched a single fucking hair on either of their heads then I will personally s –“

“I didn’t.” Lexa finally manages to say, and Clarke notices that the brunette swallows before glancing over to meet Clarke’s blue eyes. She doesn’t linger on them long before looking back to the woman in front of her. “I would never.” Lexa is shaking her head, Clarke knows this to be something that the taller woman does when she’s looking for the right words to say. “I would never hurt Clarke or Finn.”

Octavia’s head spins around to glare at her blonde friend. “Jesus Christ, Clarke! She knows his fucking name? What else did you tell her, huh? Clarke, how could you be so fucking stupid? Are fucking crazy?” Octavia is yelling and she must not realize it, but she’s moved a lot closer to Clarke now. That is until she feels a tight hand around her wrist, pulling her back towards Lexa.

“You don’t fucking talk to her like that.” Lexa growls, sending shivers down both Clarke and Octavia’s spines. “This is all on me. Clarke did what she thought was right, and that’s so much more than anyone else has ever done for me.”

Octavia jerks her hand back from Lexa’s grasp. “I wonder why? Most people don’t support murderers! I’m calling the cops!” 

“Stop!” Clarke yells, finally seeming to find her voice, that was lost among her nerves. “This is enough, Octavia. You’re not calling the cops. Lexa has done nothing wrong and I am the one that asked her to stay.”

“Nothing wrong?” Octavia shouts again. “She killed two people! Her own parents! If that’s not sick, I don’t know what is. She’s a monster, Clarke, and it only makes her look worse that she ran away!” Clarke had had her eyes closed, trying to block her tears from falling and all of her emotions from getting the better of her. When she finally opens them, she only sees Octavia before she hears the backdoor slam. 

“Shit.” Clarke utters, moving around Octavia to go after Lexa. Octavia stops her by grabbing onto the back of her best friend’s   
shirt. 

“Clarke, stop.” Her voice is softer now; more reminiscent of her best friend. “You can’t do this. You’re risking too much on a   
whim that you think some random woman might be innocent.”

“She’s not some random woman.” Clarke replies, knowing that that is not entirely true. She hasn’t even known Lexa a week, but it certainly feels like she has known her for years. Something about the brunette, something about Lexa Woods… Clarke gets.   
She understands. It’s like they’ve known each other before. In a different life, perhaps. “And I don’t think that she’s innocent.”   
Clarke says, pulling her shirt out of Octavia’s grip. “I know she is.” And like that, Clarke leaves her best friend standing there alone in her living room, while she trails after Lexa. Her housemate. Her new ‘friend’. Someone, that whether she will admit it or not, she has some sort of feelings for. Clarke cares about Lexa, even though she may not realize that just quite yet.

“Lexa!” Clarke yells, as she practically runs through the field behind her house. It’s late in the afternoon, and the sun isn’t out. It’s hidden behind clouds, making the day seem extra gloomy, which is fitting in a way. The weather is even colder than it has been the past several days, and Clarke’s mind immediately goes to remember that Lexa wasn’t wearing a jacket. “Shit.” She utters again, to no one in particular. “Lexa!” She yells again. She can’t see her. She can’t find her anywhere. ‘She wouldn’t run? Would she?’ Clarke thinks to herself, and she feels her heart start to freeze at the thought. “Lexa!” Still, no answer. 

After several minutes of looking around near the house, Clarke starts to think that maybe Lexa would have made her way to the trail that Clarke and Finn had showed her the day before. That’s where Clarke decides to go next. The light outside is fading quickly, and she hopes that she can find Lexa soon. She can’t imagine her being out here in the freezing cold weather all night by herself. “Lexa!” She continues to yell as she makes her way down the dark, shadowy path in the woods near her house. “Lexa! Please!” Clarke is starting to get desperate. She doesn’t like this. She doesn’t like this feeling. It makes her sick to her stomach to even think about Lexa being gone. “Lex – “ She stops because that’s when she finally sets eyes on the brunette. She’s only a few yards down, sitting on a stump with her face in her hands as she leans over her legs.

“Lexa?” Clarke calls again quietly, as she kneels down in front of the other woman. Clarke slowly reaches up and grabs both of Lexa’s forearms, and that’s when she immediately feels the tremors running through her the brown-headed woman’s body. Clarke wasn’t sure if it was because Lexa was more than likely freezing, or if she was just too upset. Probably both. “Hey.” Clarke mutters softly. “Lexa, please look at me. It’s just me.” The blonde subconsciously runs her thumbs over the soft fabric of Lexa’s sleeve covering her arms.

After a few more seconds, green eyes look up to meet her own, and she can now say that they literally take her breath away. Clearly, Lexa has been crying, but didn’t want Clarke to see. Even though Clarke has seen her cry once before, it’s still an odd sight. Someone as tough and strong as Lexa Woods crying… it’s something to see. Heartbreaking. “I shouldn’t have – I – I – this is all my fault.” Lexa stutters out and Clarke can see that the brunette’s lips are going blue already from the cold.

“This is not your fault.” Clarke says, squeezing Lexa’s forearms in the process. “Octavia – she’s – she shouldn’t have said what she did about you. She was wrong. She doesn’t know you.”

“You don’t know me.” Lexa snaps. “What if she’s right? I’m such a shitty person for throwing myself into yours and Finn’s life like this. God… I’m so fucking stupid. I wasn’t thinking.”

Clarke’s grip tightens so that Lexa was made to pay attention to her and listen to every word that she was about to say. “I may have only met you a few days ago, Lexa, but I feel like I do know you.” Clarke shakes her head, trying to knock away all of the inappropriate thoughts about Lexa. Nothing could ever happen between them. “I know that you’re telling the truth. I know that you’re innocent, and I know that you are the furthest thing from a monster. Don’t you listen to Octavia or anyone else who tells you differently.”

“She shouldn’t have said what she did about you.” Lexa responded. She couldn’t have really cared less about what Octavia said to her as compared to what she had said about Clarke. She hated that. 

“Well,” Clarke chuckled a little. “It was a pretty stupid thing to do. At the time.” She added for good measure.

“You’re not stupid. It was brave. What you did.” Lexa says, coughing a little afterwards from the cold air hitting her lungs.

At this point, Clarke is more than glad that her face is already red from the cold. She’s positive that Lexa would be able to see how much she was blushing had they been inside. “Come on.” Clarke says, standing up and pulling Lexa up with her. “We should head back. You’re freezing.”

“I think that I should leave, Clarke.” Lexa says, shaking her head. “I’m not wanted here. I should just leave.”

“You are wanted here.” Clarke responds without really thinking of what she was saying. “I want you here. Finn wants you here. You’re staying.” She finishes, tugging the brunette along with her, missing the small smile that seems to have formed out the brunette’s face behind her.

 

//

 

Once Clarke and Lexa are almost back to the house, Clarke can tell that Lexa’s legs are weakening and her eyes are trying to shut. Clarke immediately pulls of her hoodie and slides it over the taller woman’s head. Clarke knows that it’s bad, because Lexa doesn’t argue. It’s like she’s sleepwalking. She’s not even entirely present. Clarke pulls Lexa closer to her body, and tries to quicken their pace. Once they are at the back door, Clarke opens it and pulls Lexa in with her. Raven is sitting on the couch and immediately jumps up. “What the hell happened?”

“Not now, Raven.” Clarke says, maneuvering her and Lexa’s bodies around the furniture to go down the hall. “Where is Finn?”

“He is already in bed. Said he was tired.” Raven shrugs, earning a nod from Clarke.

“And Octavia? I assume that you met?”

“Yes.” Raven replied with an eyeroll. “I think she’s on the front porch.”

“Okay. We will see you in the morning.” Clarke says as she drags Lexa along with her down the hallway. 

“Where are you taking her?”

“She can stay in here with me. The couch is uncomfortable for her and it’s warmer back here.” Clarke notices the worried look on   
Lexa’s best friend’s face. “She’s going to be fine, Raven.” Clarke adds before walking them into her bedroom and closing the door.

“Lexa?” Clarke asks as she stands in front of the brunette and rubs her hands down the taller woman’s arms, trying to form some friction to warm her up quicker. “If I give you some clothes, can you manage by yourself?” Lexa nods, her teeth chattering too much for her to speak without biting off her own tongue. Clarke walks to her dress and retrieves a pair of sweatpants and a long-sleeve thermal shirt before she hands them to Lexa and pushes her into her ensuite bathroom. While Lexa changes, Clarke makes sure that the heater is working well enough. It is, so she starts to change herself, putting on almost the identical thing that she handed to Lexa earlier.

Clarke still can’t believe everything that happened today. How her day started with a morning alone with Lexa before she left, how the drive to Durango wasn’t near as bad as she expected, and how she and Octavia caught up so quickly. It was Octavia’s behavior towards herself and Lexa that had completely ruined the day. The look on Lexa’s face when Octavia practically called Clarke stupid…that was new. She hasn’t had someone stick up for her like that in a very long time.

Now, here she was, trying to keep Lexa from going into some sort of hypothermic shock or something because she thought that she was just going to run off and leave… what the hell? She was going to have to have a chat with Lexa about that tomorrow. She could never admit to anyone how scared that she was that Lexa might actually leave. Leave them. Leave her. It was terrifying, and even more so that she actually felt that way.

After another couple of minutes, Lexa walks out of the bathroom, wrapped up tightly in Clarke’s pajamas. She looked adorable, and Clarke couldn’t hide her grin. Luckily, Lexa was really too out of it to notice. “You okay?” Clarke asks, walking closer to the brunette. Lexa nods. “You sure?”

“Yes.”

“She speaks.” Clarke teases and doesn’t miss the eyeroll she gets in return. “Ready for bed?”

Lexa nods again before walking to the door. “Goodnight, Clarke.”

“Uh – I don’t think so.” The blonde says, grabbing Lexa’s arm and pulling her closer. “You’re staying in here. It’s much too cold up towards the front of the house. My room is the warmest.”\

“I’m not taking your room, C-Clarke.” She stutters out, her teeth still chattering from the cold.

“No. You’re not.” Clarke grins as she pulls Lexa towards the bed. “I’m staying in here too. If that’s okay with you?” Clarke asks just to make sure, but she doesn’t know why it would really bother the other woman.

Lexa knows that she could never win this argument. Once Clarke sets her mind to something, that’s usually how it happens. “Okay.” Lexa answers softly with a nod. Clarke leads her over to the bed like a little lost puppy, and even tucks her in, causing Lexa to chuckle, but the bed is already so warm… it feels nice. Clarke piles in on the other side, and scoots too close to Lexa. “Clarke?”

“Yeah?”

“Why are you so close?”

“Does it bother you?”

“No.”

“Good, because it’s about to be closer.” The blonde says, startling Lexa when she moves even closer and drapes her arms around Lexa pulling her closer too. “Your body is still in shock.” Clarke answers before Lexa can even get out her question. “I have to keep you warm, so I hope that you don’t mind the closeness for the night.”

“This is just you wanting to cuddle.” Lexa teases, earning a playful slap from Clarke.

“Well,” Clarke says, and that’s when Lexa realizes that she’s is far to close to this blonde. She clenches her thighs together at the sultry sound of Clarke’s voice, and the warm breath near her ear. “You did say that you would cuddle the fuck out of me.”  
Lexa let’s out a long breath, and then swallows at the dry lump starting to form in her throat. She’s never been more grateful for the freezing cold weather. “This is true.” Lexa responds, before pulling Clarke impossibly closer. Okay… this is most definitely not what two people who just met each other do. Especially under their circumstances. Lexa is quite sure that if Octavia could see them now, she would absolutely, unequivocally hate her even more. 

Clarke shifts a bit, until her face is buried into Lexa’s neck. She tries to subtly take in the brunette’s scent. She’s always so intoxicating, and she’s never been more thankful for the freezing cold weather either. “Goodnight, Lexa.” The blonde says, her warm breath brushing against the cold skin of Lexa’s neck and causing goose bumps to form across her body.

Lexa pulls the covers tighter around them and pulls Clarke even closer. “Goodnight, Clarke.” She replies softly, wanting nothing more than to reach down a place a kiss to the crown of the blonde’s head, but she refrains. This is too much as it is. Tonight, she was just going to enjoy the closeness, and tomorrow… tomorrow, she would try and distance herself from the new people in her life.

 

//

 

When the brightness of the early morning sun, and the blurriness of Clarke’s sleepy vision mend together when she opens her eyes, she squeezes them tightly shut just as quick as she opened them. The sun was brighter than she would have liked it to be, so early in the morning, but she was glad that she was warmer this morning than she usually was on any other. Usually, when Clarke woke up, it was an act of congress to get her out of bed, because all that she wanted to do, was snuggle up in the covers and go back to sleep; too cold to get out of bed. After another few moments with her eyes closely shut, she begins to stretch a little and then she realizes why her bed is warmer on this morning than any other.

Lexa.

Clarke urges herself to open her eyes once more, glancing out of her peripheral vision to see if the brunette was awake or not. She wasn’t. Thank goodness. Clarke was glad that she allowed Lexa to stay in her room last night… to get warm. That was all that it was for, but she wasn’t quite ready to wake up to an awkward conversation, so she decided that she would get out of bed before Lexa awoke. Just after she stared a little bit more.

Lexa’s long, brown hair was on slightly tangled and it seemed to flow endlessly around her sculpted face, and down over her exposed collarbone poking out of the t-shirt that Clarke let her borrow last night. Clarke remembers last night being a little weird at first, but the closer that she was to Lexa, the more comfortable that she felt. It was a strange feeling, one that she wasn’t very familiar with, but not necessarily opposed to.

Like any of the other times that Clarke had watched Lexa sleep, (okay, that sounds a lot weirder now that she actually thinks about it), she notices that the brunette’s mouth is partly opened, and her breathing is soft and steady. Lexa’s full set of lips seem so soft, it takes everything she has in her not to just go ahead and lean over to place a chaste kiss to them, but that would most definitely be weird, so she refrains. The end of Lexa’s nose crinkles, as she thinks about something in her sleep, and Clarke thinks that it’s one of the most adorable things that she’s ever encountered. When Lexa moves a bit, causing a small strand of hair to fall down into her face, Clarke’s breath hitches and she thinks that she might have been caught in the act again, but no voice ever comes. Clarke slowly reaches over and pushes the strand back behind Lexa’s cute, little ear, with a smile. 

Clarke can’t help but wonder how anyone could ever do something so horrible, such as framing them for the murder of their own parents, to someone so perfect and sweet as Lexa is. This Nia woman is clearly awful, and needs to be dealt with straight away. Clarke vows there and then that she will do whatever she can to help Lexa and Raven bring that woman down.

The blonde finally manages to pull herself away from her new bedmate, and throws on a warm robe to head out of her bedroom.   
She’s off of work until after the new year, not that she really wants to be, because she needs to money desperately, but she is glad to be able to be home with Finn and Octavia. And Lexa if she’s being quite honest with herself.

She makes her way down the hallway. She can see that the living room and kitchen lights are still off, so she must be the first one up. When she reaches the sofa, however, she finds her best friend sitting there with a hot mug of coffee stuck firmly between her   
hands.

“Morning.” Clarke says softly. She’s still very upset at Octavia for the way that she acted yesterday, but she will always love her.   
She’s like her sister, but she has to get to the bottom of this situation, because she is not making Lexa leave and Octavia will just have to live with it or leave herself.

“Morning.” Octavia responds before taking a sip of her brew. 

“Did you sleep well?” Clarke asks Octavia, knowing that, more than likely, her friend slept in Finn’s room with him because he always wants his ‘Aunt O’ to sleep with him. The black-headed girl only nods, clearly not having much to say to Clarke at all. “Can we talk about yesterday?” Clarke decides on asking. She wants to just skip over all of the bullshit and dive straight in. “We have to, because I can’t live like this… with you angry at me and not talking to me.”

“Yet, you can live with a convict?” Octavia snaps harshly, but quiet enough not to wake anyone. “An escaped on at that.”

“That’s not fair.” Clarke argues, bringing on leg up to tuck under her other on the couch. “You don’t know her.”

“And neither do you, Clarke.” Octavia huffs. “Jesus, Clarke… what were you thinking? Letting her stay here with Finn in the house?”

“I don’t have to answer your questions, Octavia. This is my house, and this was my decision, and I continue to stand by it.” Clarke maintains. “You need to trust that I am doing the right thing here.”

“Clarke…” Octavia breathes out, looking down at her hands that are still tightly wrapped around her mug. “You’ve always had the biggest heart of anyone that I’ve ever known, but doing this… putting yourself and Finn in danger because you feel like it’s the ‘right thing to do’,” Octavia says, throwing up air quotes around the last few words. “It’s crazy. You need to let me call the cops. If she says that she’s innocent, then the law can figure that out. It isn’t your place.”

“The law,” Clarke starts back in, defending her new friend and her problems. “Has had ten years to sort this out, and they haven’t. She was framed, Octavia. All of the evidence that is there, points directly at her.”

“Yet, you believe her?”

“I do.” Clarke nods her head as she answers as sincerely as possible. “I believe her, O. You didn’t see her face when she told me what happened. She cried, and every word that fell from her mouth was genuine and truthful. She gave me no reason not to believe her.”

They sit in silence a few minutes; Octavia thinking a mile a minute, while Clarke can only sit there and watch her best friend. She looks perplexed, and Clarke wonders what all kinds of thoughts are running around in that head of Octavia’s. After what feels close to an eternity, Octavia finally speaks softly, breaking the silence.

“So, if someone framed her,” The shorter woman starts, fidgeting in her place on the sofa, clearly uncomfortable with this entire situation. “Then who was it? What did they have to gain from framing Alexandria for her parents’ murder?”

Clarke smiled internally, knowing that if Octavia was asking these questions, then she was on the right track to persuading her friend to trust in Lexa as well. “Well, again, she goes by Lexa,” Clarke smiles a small smile. “And the person that framed her was her Aunt Nia.”

“The woman who owns Woods Enterprises now?”

“Yes.” Clarke nods softly. “You see, Alexei and Anya, Lexa’s parents, were prepping Lexa to learn the family business. Once they were to retire, several years later, Lexa was to take over. The way that Lexa talks… Nia has always been power hungry and money obsessed. The only people standing in the way of Nia taking over the company, were Lexa and her parents.” Clarke sighs, looking down at her hands that are in her lap, fiddling with the hem of her robe. “According to Lexa, Nia hated her older brother anyways. She said that Alexei was wasting money on things like Doctors Without Borders and those types of things that they helped fund. Apparently, Lexa’s father was getting ready to kick Nia out of the company for good, until… well, you know.”

Clarke hears her friend hum in her own thoughts. “So, Nia killed two birds with one stone.” Octavia says, before grimacing when she realizes what she said. “Sorry. Bad word choice. So, Nia killed, or had Lexa’s parents killed, and then framed Lexa for it herself. Getting rid of all three Woods in the process.”

“Exactly.” Clarke nods.

“I don’t know, Clarke.” Octavia seems worrisome still. “This is all a bit much. It seems a bit far-fetched.”

Clarke shakes her head, she’s proud that Octavia has calmed down a little bit from yesterday, but she knows that it may take her friend more time to get used to the idea that Lexa is innocent. “Lexa’s innocent, O.” Clarke says, for what feels like the fifteenth time. “She’s real.”

“Why are you so calm about this?” Octavia asks with raised brows. “Why do you talk about her as if she hung the moon? You’ve only just met.”

“I don’t talk about her like that.” Clarke disagrees, hoping that she really doesn’t talk about Lexa in that way.

“You do.” Her friend says seriously. “Yesterday, you ran after her without hesitating.”

“Because she was upset.”

“And? You thought that you had to be the one to make sure that she was okay?”

“Well, Raven isn’t one to really do much comforting, it doesn’t seem… and you’re my friend. You’re the one that made her upset, so I felt it only right that I went after her.” Clarke answers honestly.

“Who is this Raven, anyways?” Octavia asks. “She only said, maybe, two words to me last night before going to the basement. Is that where they are staying?”

“Raven is Lexa’s best friend. She’s some sort of genius. I think that she’s the one that helped Lexa… get out.” Clarke says the last part a little quieter. She didn’t like to think of Lexa breaking the law and escaping prison, even though she knew that it was necessary at the time. “She’s staying in the basement, along with all of her equipment. She’s going back over all of the evidence and details of Lexa’s case. Trying to find something that the investigators missed, hopefully.”

“So, Lexa,” Octavia starts back in, seemingly trying to get all of the facts in her head straight. “The escapee, and her genius best friend, Raven… they are living in your basement trying to prove Lexa’s innocence on a ten-year-old murder case?”

“Yes.” Clarke nods again, thinking that this is starting to feel a little bit repetitive, but whatever makes Octavia understand better, Clarke will do. “Well – no… I mean – yes. Raven is living in the basement. Lexa has been sleeping on the couch.” Clarke says, not realizing that she just opened herself up for more questioning. “Raven hardly lets Lexa down into the basement. Doesn’t want her messing with anything, because Lexa isn’t very technologically advanced.” Clarke giggles a bit, thinking of she and Finn helping Lexa learn how to use her iPhone the other day.

“So…” Octavia utters. “Where does Lexa sleep?”

‘Oh shit.’ Clarke thinks to herself. She didn’t realize what she had done. She can’t lie to Octavia about last night… maybe she won’t make too big of a deal out of their sleeping arrangements from the day before. “Well, she’s been sleeping on the couch.”

“Uh huh.” Octavia nods. “And where is she now? Did she leave early this morning or something?”

“Uh, well – um – no. She’s, uh… she’s actually in my bed right now.”

Clarke sees the moment that those words sink into Octavia’s brain. She’s sees when the proverbial light flickers on and her best friend’s eyes widen at the realization. “Clarke!” Her friend exclaims much too loudly, earning a shush from Clarke, plus a slap on the arm. “That’s why you kept her here?” Octavia’s voice is a more like a whisper now, compared to her earlier break out. “To bang her?”

It was Clarke’s turn for her eyes to widen in shock. “What? God no, Octavia! It’s – uh – it’s nothing like that at all.” Clarke is shaking her head, trying to think of something to get her friend off of her back about this. “Last night… she was, uh – going to go into hypothermic shock, so I brought her in, gave her some warmer clothes, and told her to stay in my room because it was warmer.”

“So, you had to stay in there too? Just to what? To make sure that she was warm enough?” Octavia asks, but luckily there’s not much edge to her voice anymore, and Clarke wonders if her best friend is having a little too much fun teasing her about this. “Tell me that you, Clarke Griffin, the cuddle queen, did not cuddle the stranger in your bed last night.”

Clarke doesn’t answer, because there’s nothing to say. She’s not going to lie, but she also doesn’t want to tell the truth. It’s a hard decision, but Octavia clearly comes to the conclusion on her own. “Jesus, Clarke!” Octavia exclaims again, but this time, to   
Clarke’s surprise, her friend laughs. “You – you couldn’t even keep it in your pants for a week?”

“What?” Clarke asks in horror. “Octavia. Shut the fuck up.” Clarke laughs this time too. “That is not what this is about. Lexa is here, and I’m going to help her prove her innocence, alongside Raven. I’m only helping her. She deserves that.”

Octavia is still chuckling, but it’s now dying down some. “Uh huh. You just keep telling yourself that, Griff. So, that’s why you talk about her like she’s all high and mighty.”

“I do not.” Clarke argues again, but obviously, Octavia still doesn’t believe her. After a few more moments of her friend’s chuckling, and allowing Clarke’s blush to finally fade a bit, Clarke speaks again. “You should see Finn with her, O.” Clarke doesn’t realize how big she is smiling. “He is crazy about her, and I would almost say the same thing about her with him. They’ve been playing baseball, and she’s bought him so many Christmas gifts. It’s unreal.” Clarke grins, knowingly now. “Finn even wants her to tell him his bedtime stories now, O.”

“Wait, what? Seriously?” Octavia asks with a decent amount of surprise in her voice. “That’s, uh – that’s different.” She says, as her eyes look over her best friend, trying to get a real read on Clarke’s feelings for this new person in her life. “That’s kind of a big deal, Clarke.”

Clarke puts her head in her hands and shakes it there. She lets out a loud groan before speaking. “I know. I don’t – I just.”

“You like her.” Octavia says softly. “Don’t you?”

Clarke doesn’t look up and she doesn’t answer either. After a few more seconds, the only thing that the blonde can do is let out a loud groan, muffled by her warm hands. “I’m so screwed.”

 

//

 

A few days pass by, at Clarke’s house, and everything seems to be different all of a sudden. Ever since Monday morning, when Lexa woke finally woke up and got out of Clarke’s bed, things between them have been strange. At least, in Clarke’s eyes. The fact that Octavia called Clarke out on her feelings for Lexa, by far helped Clarke push those feelings aside. Clarke couldn’t do this. She couldn’t have feelings for anyone. Especially not Lexa. Before long, she would be gone and on her way again… whichever way that may or may not be. She’s trying to keep herself from being around Lexa for too long at a time. It’s a hard task, because anytime she sees Lexa, she feels as if there are magnets buried deep within their bodies, pulling them towards each other and not exactly giving them a chance to fight it.

Even though, internally, it’s felt like a difficult thing to do… it really hasn’t been, because Lexa has been avoiding Clarke, as well. Well, as much as someone can avoid someone in a small home. All that Clarke can think about, is how she, more than likely, made Lexa uncomfortable with the whole ‘cuddling’ incident. Yeah. She shouldn’t have done that, but she actually really thought that the warmth would help Lexa, but it would be a complete lie if she said that a little bit of it wasn’t for her. For her to feel, at least, a small sliver of comfort from someone else.

Raven had, obviously, lifted Lexa’s ban on going into the basement, because that’s where the brunette has been the past couple of days. Sitting down there, staring at several different computer screens, trying to figure out what the hell they can do to clear Lexa’s name.

Clarke is thankful that Octavia is here, because Finn has been more than a little bit devastated about how Lexa doesn’t have much time to hang out with him anymore. So, Finn has been playing with Octavia and Clarke, since Clarke doesn’t have work for a while. It breaks Clarke’s heart to see Finn so upset about Lexa… but maybe, after everything, Lexa was right. It wasn’t right for the three of them to get so close. To be so entangled into each other’s lives. Because, in the long run, they would be separated.   
Maybe, as bad as Clarke didn’t want to admit it, this was for the best.

“What are you thinking about, mom?” Clarke hears Finn ask as he walks up behind her. She’s been sitting on the back porch for several minutes now. It’s freezing outside, but she doesn’t care. She feels as if her whole body is numb anyways. All she can think about, is being in Lexa’s arms. All that she can see, is green. All that she can smell, is Lexa’s now familiar scent, making its way through every pore of Clarke’s body. Even though it’s been a few days since Clarke was even close enough to smell her.

Finn plops down, on the slab of concrete, known as their back porch, and lays his head over on his mother’s shoulder. Clarke scoots in closer to him, and wraps her blanket around his shoulders as well. “Just a lot of different stuff.” Clarke shrugs. She’s not about to tell her son how much she misses Lexa too. “What’s Octavia doing?” 

“She’s in the kitchen with Raven.” Finn answers and Clarke looks down at him. “They’re cooking supper, I think.”

“Raven and Octavia are cooking supper together?”

“Yes, ma’am.” He replies sweetly. “Octavia said that she was going to start dinner, and Raven said that she would help. I think   
that they sort of forgot I was in there, so I decided to come out here with you.”

Clarke makes sure to wrap her son up even tighter in her arms, before his small voice speaks again. “I miss Lexa.”

Clarke lets out a long sigh, trying to ignore the stabbing pain that seems to flow through her body every time that she hears that name now. “She’s in the basement, buddy.” The blonde responds, knowing full well what her son was talking about. He misses being around Lexa. He misses her jokes. He misses her laugh, and her teasing, and her warm personality. Just like Clarke does.

“Did I do something wrong?” Finn asks meekly and Clarke really wants to ignore the slight crack in his voice. “I don’t know what happened.”

“No, sweetie.” Clarke answers, placing a kiss to the crown of his brown hair. “Lexa – she’s just really busy right now. She had, uh – she has a lot of work today. You’ve done nothing wrong.” The two of them sit there in silence for a while, watching the small, winter birds flying through the crisp air of December, and seeing the squirrels run and play with each other, in the small amount of snow that is lying on the ground.

Eventually, Finn excuses himself to go to the living room to watch television. Clarke isn’t far behind him, but instead of watching TV, she makes her way to her bedroom, where she decides that she wants to sketch some. It’s been so long, a month or so, since she’s drawn anything new. She hasn’t had much to inspire her. Hasn’t had much to dream about. At least until the last few days. Clarke pulls out her art book and pencils and clambers onto her bed. She needs to be more focused on her art. It’s the only thing that she truly feels great at, yet she tosses it aside as if it were nothing.

Only two people know about her upcoming Winter showcase, at the local art gallery, in Silverton coming up only days before Christmas, and that’s she and Finn. She’s not one to allow people to look at her art, but when Dr. Jaha saw some of Clarke’s sketches at work one day, he took it upon himself to show them to Mr. Wallace, who runs the gallery in town. Around this time, every year, he chooses three local artists to showcase and give their name a bit of prestige. Clarke just happens to be one of them, and she’s not entirely sure what she thinks about that. She knows that it’s not that big of a deal, since there’s probably only five artists in the town of Silverton. She shrugs it off, and pushes the showcase off of her mind for a while so that she can focus on what she’s sketching.

 

//

 

Down in the basement, Lexa was slumped over, sitting on an aggravatingly, uncomfortable stool, looking at multiple computer screens at one time. She doesn’t understand how Raven manages to stay like this for hours and days upon end. Lexa has been at this for the past two or three days. She can’t really remember to be honest. Time seems to be something of a foreign concept to her now, after everything that she’s been through.

Now, though, her days seem even longer. Even more repetitive and dull. Now that she’s been trying to distance herself from the two people that have made her days warmer and more exciting over the past week. Clarke and Finn are all that she’s been able to think about, as bad as she doesn’t want to admit it. She misses being able to hang out with Finn, playing baseball and building puzzles and watching documentaries. She misses Clarke’s warm smile and their witty conversations and really just everything about the blonde is something to be missed.

Lexa’s chest aches at how she knows that she’s been avoiding the two of them. She knows how it looks and she knows that it’s for the best, in the long run, but it certainly doesn’t feel for the best. She feels like an awful human being for just dropping Finn and Clarke in that way. Especially Finn, because he has no idea about what’s going on. He doesn’t know why Lexa is avoiding him… at least Clarke sort of has an idea.

She can’t stand to linger on these thoughts, yet, that’s all that she seems to think about. Not her imminent capture. Not her impending departure from this cold, ghost town. Not the fact that she should wracking her brain, searching these computers, doing anything to find a way to declare herself innocent. No. All she can think about is how badly she wants to be near Clarke. How badly she wants to hang out with Finn, and how badly she wishes that she could have met the two of them in another lifetime, and not this fucked up one.

After a few more minutes of mindlessly staring at computer screens, Lexa finds herself almost falling asleep, until she hears the basement door open and footsteps coming down the wooden stairs. “Still nothing, I’m guessing?” Raven asks, as she makes her way over to her friend at the computers.

“Your guess would be correct.” Lexa responds, not bothering to look up and over at her best friend.

Raven plops down on the stool next to Lexa and spins a moment as she tries to think of what she wants to say. She’s realized Lexa’s gloom and doom behavior over the past couple of days. She knows that it’s because Lexa is trying to slowly ease herself out of Finn and Clarke’s life, and Raven didn’t realize how much the two meant to Lexa until now. It’s obvious that her friend cares for them. In what capacity, she’s not entirely sure, but she does know that she’s never seen Lexa this way with anyone. She’s never seen her best friend act so tore up about the fact that she’s having to avoid them and push them away. It’s clearly killing Lexa on the inside, and Raven can’t help but think that she’s part of the reason why. She’s should have kept her mouth shut, and she would have had she known the immensity of Lexa’s feelings for their two housemates.

“What’s going on in that head of yours’ Woods?” Raven asks, after a few moments of silence and spinning. “You’ve been… different the past few days.”

“Nothing’s going on in my head, Ray.” Lexa groans. “I’m trying to figure this shit out,” The taller brunette says, using her hand to gesture at all of the computer screens in front of them. “So that we can leave these people be. Rid them of all of this bullshit.”

“These people?” Raven responds softly, more softly than she’s used to. “It’s Clarke and Finn, Lexa.” Her friend states. “Not just two random people.”

“It is just two random people!” Lexa snaps, finally spinning on her own stool and turning to face Raven. “We don’t know them. We’ve been here a week.” Raven is positive that she can see a small bit of water forming slowly in the green eyes across from her.   
It’s very unlikely that Lexa would ever cry, but Raven actually thinks that she might this time.

“Why are you being like that?” Raven asks. “You know that that is complete and utter bullshit. Yes. We have only known them for a week, but I have never seen you act like this or be so comfortable with someone as you’ve been with blondie and her kid.”

“What do you want me to do, Raven?” Lexa snaps once again, standing from her seated position and marching over to the other side of the room, where she leans against the wall there. “You told me to distance myself and that’s what I’m doing! You were right. I shouldn’t have allowed myself to get close to them. It was so fucking stupid and I regret it.”

“I was wrong.” Raven says assuredly, causing Lexa to quickly look up at her. “I was so, so wrong, Lexa.” Her best friend moves closer to her as she talks. “I thought that it was stupid for you to get attached to someone, because of everything that you’re already having to deal with, but I can see that it was what was making you stronger. Making you want to push harder and find out more. I can see, now, that being around those two, for whatever reason, has been making you happier than I’ve ever seen you. It’s real and genuine.” Raven says, laying a hand on Lexa’s forearm. “Stop listening to me and do whatever the fuck you want to do.” Her friend says with a genuine smile.

Lexa shakes her head and looks down at her feet. There’s a short moment of silence before anyone speaks. Raven can tell that her friend is thinking. Most likely, thinking about the consequences of getting too close to someone right now. “I can’t.” Lexa practically whispers. 

“And why not?”

“I – I’m scared.” Lexa confesses. “I’m scared that if I get too close to someone before any of this other shit is dealt with, then I will end up hurting them or they’ll end up hurting me. I have too much going on in my life right now, and I’m not about to throw all of that onto someone else.”

“No one said that you have to.” Raven responds. “Clarke will, clearly, be a great friend to you.” She tries not to say more than ‘friend’ because she really isn’t sure on how her best friend views Clarke. “And Finn… as much as I hate kids, and you know that I hate kids… well, he’s pretty awesome.” Lexa chuckles a bit at that and nods her head. “What I’m saying is, who says that you can’t have people like that in your life now and even after everything is over and done with?”

“I guess that I could always use more friends.” Lexa realizes as she listens to her best friend talk. Even though the words ‘friends’ and ‘Clarke’ in the same sentence together do tend to sting a bit. Of course, if all goes to plan against Nia, Lexa could see Clarke as much as she liked. That is… if Clarke was willing.

“That’s the spirit.” Raven grins, patting Lexa on the back in the process. “Now, go up there and apologize for you and me both.” Raven chuckles and watches as Lexa nods her head and makes her way up the steps of the basement.

 

//

 

Clarke is sitting in her bedroom floor, on the opposite side of the bed, leaning up against the frame. Her back is to the door, and when there’s a knock on the door, followed by a creak, Clarke turns her head and only her face is visible to those coming through the door.

“Hey.” Lexa’s soft voice rings through throughout the room. Clarke can see that something is wrong. Lexa is nervous. She can tell by the way that the brunette is only poking her head through the door, and not walking in. She can tell by the way that Lexa’s hand, that is still holding the doorknob, is shaking ever so slightly. Lexa’s face is crestfallen, and almost a bit sad. “Can, uh – can we talk?” The brunette finishes, clearly cringing at her own words.

“Of course.” Clarke replies, waving Lexa in, but not getting up from her spot on the floor on the other side of the bed. At Clarke’s answer, Lexa makes her way into the blonde’s bedroom, shutting the door, quietly, behind her. Lexa, timidly, makes her way over to where Clarke is sitting, and she’s sure that her nerves in that moment will be the death of her. She’s not sure what she even wants to say, but she knows that something needs to be said. She needs to apologize for avoiding Clarke and Finn.

When Lexa makes her way over, and Clarke comes into full view, she sees the mess that the blonde has thrown around in the floor. Paper, pencils, erasers. Several of the loose pages of paper were drawn upon, and even from her standing position, Lexa could see the small, intricate details of every sketch. “Di – did you do these?” She asks, cautiously, still stunned from how great the sketches really were. The answer was obvious. Clarke did, in fact, draw these. There were tell-tale signs of the charcoal pencil all over the blonde’s hands. Clarke’s answer only comes in the form of a shy nod, followed by a red blush to cover the blonde’s upper half. “Clarke,” Lexa starts in again, shaking her head slowly and not knowing what to say. “These are – “ Lexa sits down in the floor, beside the blonde and brings her knees up to her chest. “These are something else.” Clarke looks to her then with a thin smile on her face. “They’re really amazing. You’re so talented. I had no idea that you could draw.”

Clarke didn’t know how to respond to Lexa. She was still trying to get over the fact that this is the most that they’ve talked to   
each other in three days. She really didn’t want people seeing her sketches, but if anyone had, she’s glad that it was Lexa. The brunette always makes her feel better about things, whether she realizes it or not. “Thank you.” Clarke responds softly, lying a box of pencils down beside her. “I do it every once in a while as a hobby.” The blonde shrugs.

“Well, from the looks of these hobbies of yours,” Lexa says, her eyes still roaming around the floor, gathering in all of the beauty that is before them. “You could do this for a living.”

“Thank you, Lexa.” Clarke replies shyly. “I’ve -uh – this is really weird.” Lexa shoots a brow up at the blonde’s statement. “I mean, the only other person that knows about this is Finn, but I’ve actually got a Winter showcase coming up in a week or so. In town. The man that owns the gallery wanted to showcase my sketches, so I agreed.”

“Clarke,” Lexa’s smile widens and Clarke’s butterflies, that have been missing for a couple of days, seem to come fluttering back. “That’s fucking awesome. I’m so happy for you.” Clarke chuckles a little bit at how truly impressed Lexa seems to be.

“Thanks.” Clarke says again, and after a couple of seconds more of silence, she speaks again. “You said that we needed to talk.”

“Oh -uh, well… I just –“ Lexa stutters about and Clarke finds it to be one of the most adorable things that Lexa does, because most of the time, she’s so sure of herself, so it’s nice to see her fumble around a bit. “I wanted to -uh, to apologize for my behavior.”

“For what?”

“I’ve been, well… distant, I guess, is the word.” Lexa shrugs and slinks her back down against the frame of the bed behind them. “I’m just worried that I may hurt Finn’s feelings when I have to leave.” That’s only a half-truth, but Lexa doesn’t want to presume that she would even hurt Clarke’s feelings if she left. When she left. “I was afraid that I might have been getting too close, you know?”

Clarke is listening intently, and she seems to find herself reading through the lines. She’s pretty good at that. She wonders if Finn is the only person’s feelings that Lexa is afraid of hurting. She feels bad for hoping that Lexa is thinking about her as well.   
When Lexa says that she’s ‘getting too close’, does that mean too close to Clarke? Clarke certainly thinks that the two of them have gotten close over the past week. It’s weird that it’s only been that short of a time, and considering the way that they met.

“I understand, Lexa.” Clarke responds. “But, you don’t have to worry about that right now. Who knows how long you’ll be here? Finn has been so upset that he hasn’t gotten to hang out with you. It’s really broken his heart, I think. He needs you to be here for him now. We can worry about the rest later.”

Lexa has also been doing her own version of reading between the lines. She wonders if Clarke has been upset too. She hates the thought of the blonde being upset because of her actions, as well as Finn. “I’m just – I don’t want to hurt him.” Lexa replies more confidently than before. 

‘Hurt him or me or both?’ Clarke things to herself.

“You won’t.” Clarke replies honestly, moving a hand over to place it gently on Lexa’s forearm. “I knew what you were doing, you know? I knew that you were avoiding us for that reason. Especially after everything that Raven and Octavia said to you.” Lexa looked over to her blue eyes and nodded. Of course Clarke knew, because, for some reason, Clarke seemed to know her better than anyone at the moment. “I told you not to listen to them.” Clarke grins.

“You were right.” Lexa says with another grin. “I should have listened to you, Miss Griffin.” The brunette teases, and Clarke’s hand on her arm squeezes her tightly for punishment. “Ow – shit.” Lexa chuckles. After the two of them giggle a bit, they find their sides closer together now; the warmth of the other making their bodies seemingly catch fire. “Thank you for understanding, Clarke. I was being an idiot.”

“You were definitely being an idiot, but I forgive you.” Clarke teases. “Now, are you going to sleep in here again?” Lexa’s eyes widen and she shakes her head frantically. “No, uh, - I uh, better stay on the sofa.”

“Why?” Clarke smiles. “Didn’t like my cuddling?”

Lexa lets out a bark of laughter followed by Clarke’s own. “No. No. You’re a superb cuddler, but I think that maybe I should stay elsewhere. Don’t want the others to get the wrong idea.”

“Yeah.” Clarke says, nodding her head slowly. “Totally -uh, no I agree, but at least stay in the room. It’s so much warmer. I happen to know an expert pallet maker.” She grins.

Lexa considers it. It is most certainly warmer in Clarke’s bedroom than the living room, and as long as she didn’t have to be next to Clarke, then that would probably be okay. Not that being next to Clarke wouldn’t be okay… it would just be… well, you know. “I guess that could work.” Lexa smiles.

“I’ll go fetch him.” The blonde says with a smile, standing up and tucking her pencils into the nightstand by her bed. 

“No.” Lexa says, stopping her before she can go get Finn. “Let me.” Clarke nods in understanding and can’t help her heart from warming that Lexa wants to go in a see Finn herself, most likely to apologize to him.

Lexa leaves Clarke’s bedroom and walks down the hall to Finn’s room. She pokes her head in the doorway, and Finn immediately sees her, but he doesn’t get excited like he usually does. “Hey, little dud.” Lexa smiles softly, walking over to where he is lying on his bed. “I just wanted to come in here and apologize for being too busy to hang out with you. I promise that that is over now. Want to play ball with me tomorrow? I think that I may be getting a little rusty.”

Lexa laughs when Finn’s eyes widen and he breaks out into a smile before nodding his head ecstatically and jumping up to throw his arms around Lexa’s neck. This, truly, catches her off guard. This is the first time that Finn has hugged her, and she’s so lost in her own thoughts, that she almost forgets to hug him back. Almost. 

She brings her arms around his small body and squeezes. She feels him squeeze her tighter too and she laughs. Finn pulls away, but he is still smiling like the sun. “I can’t wait to play catch again.” He smiles. “It’s going to be so much fun!”

“You bet it is.” Lexa responds kindly. “Now, I know that you’re about to head to sleep, but do you mind helping me with something really quick?” He nods his head as he smiles. “I’m uh, I’m having a sleepover in your mom’s room. I heard that you were the best pallet maker around. Care to help me?”

Finn smiles and jumps up off the bed to run into the hallway. Lexa follows him to where he has his head stuck in one of the small closets that litter the hallway. He’s pulling out blanket after blanket and pillow after pillow. “This is going to be the best pallet ever!” He says, but his voice is muffled by all of the fabric trying to cover his mouth. Lexa laughs before taking some of them off of his hands and the two of them walk into Clarke’s bedroom where she’s just finished putting up her sketches. “Mom!” He exclaims. “I’m making Lexa a blanket pallet for your sleepover!” Clarke looks to Lexa and they share a moment with a soft smile before she looks down at Finn again.

“That’s great, sweetie!” She says. “Need some help?” He nods his head as Lexa and Clarke both step over to help him, and the three of them spend another half hour joking around and starting pillow fights that no one wants to stop.

Lexa doesn’t know what she was thinking, trying to stay away from these two. They are really something special.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> What did you guys think? Let me know in the comments below and don't be afraid to leave kudos! ;) Love you all!
> 
> Follow me on Twitter @asuzh90
> 
> Also, I have another fic in the work. Almost done with chapter 1! :)


	8. How Long Can We Keep This Up?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> What's up, guys? I hope that everyone is well, and your holidays are going great! I also hope that you enjoy this update. I feel like I might have rushed a bit, because I've been so crazy with work and some family stuff going on, but maybe it will be worth the read.

A couple of days later, everything seems to be going okay at Clarke’s house. Lexa has been better about not avoiding the blonde and Finn, and, though, Octavia still hasn’t really spoken to Lexa, she hasn’t ratted her out, so that’s a plus, right?

Octavia is very keen on keeping her distance from the fugitive staying with her best friend. She mostly sits back and watches from a distance, because, like Clarke, Octavia can read people, it’s just that sometimes she’s not as optimistic about things like her blonde friend. The short, black-haired woman finds the whole situation strange. Who wouldn’t? She’s watched as Lexa has played baseball with Finn outside; running around like a fool, always trying to get the kid to laugh. She’s watched her cook in Clarke’s kitchen for the entire lot of them, while simultaneously watching Netflix with Finn, and chatting about sea creatures. The previous night, Octavia saw Finn pulling Lexa into his bedroom to read him a bedtime story, and the taller woman was more than happy to oblige.

Octavia has come to one conclusion within her own mind. Lexa Woods is a very strange person.

No one in their right mind, would run away from prison and shack up with the first person that told them that they had to stay. No one in their right mind, would try and become friends with that person and her son. Octavia really hopes that she’s wrong about the thought that keeps running around in the back of her mind. A thought that she couldn’t vocalize to Clarke. Lexa Woods is fooling them all, and only wants to use them for something. She’s not too sure of what, but she will most definitely find out.

Another unusual occurrence, that Octavia has noticed within in few days of being here with her best friend and her new housemates, is that Clarke Griffin is staring. Way too much. Like, it’s getting a little weird. Lexa hasn’t seen Clarke staring yet, at least not to Octavia’s knowledge, but Octavia can’t help but wonder ‘why’. Why is her best friend staring at this other woman, from a distance, while she plays with Clarke’s son? Why does Clarke seem to be smiling, more so than usual? Octavia knows that Clarke is attracted to Lexa. That much was fairly clear when they talked the other morning, but the way that Clarke looks at the other woman… that’s something. Something way more than attraction.

“Whatcha thinking about?” Clarke’s voice interrupts Octavia’s many thoughts. Octavia has done nothing but worry about Clarke ever since she found out about the Woods girl staying here. It’s getting to be too much for her, but she can’t just leave. She can’t leave Clarke and Finn here alone with them. What if something were to happen? She could never forgive herself, so, for now, she would have to stay here and keep her thoughts to herself.

Octavia looks over to where Clarke has appeared at her side, in the living room. Octavia had been watching Lexa and Finn play ball outside, through the windows. She wasn’t lying when she said that she was going to watch the other woman’s every step. “Nothing in particular.” Octavia shrugs nonchalantly. “Just hoping that little Finn will like the present that I got him this year.” She really does hope that, but that’s not at all what she was thinking about.

Clarke gives her best friend a look that says, ‘I know that you’re lying’, but she doesn’t say it verbally. “I’m sure that he’ll love it.” Clarke grins. “You know, I was thinking that maybe, before Christmas, we could have a girl’s night. Mrs. Caldwell could keep Finn for the night. I think that her granddaughter is staying with her for a while, and they’ve been wanting to play together.” Octavia doesn’t miss when Clarke’s blue eyes flicker out the window to watch Lexa.

“Girl’s night, huh?” Octavia questions with a raised brow, dragging Clarke’s attention back to the inside of the house. “What would that entail, exactly? I mean, I assume that Raven and Lexa would be in on this as well.”

Clarke tries to read her friend’s face. She wishes that she could know what was going on in that head of hers, desperately. “Well, uh I – I mean, yeah.” The blonde stutters, for no reason in particular. “I thought that we could include them. They aren’t going anywhere.” Clarke finishes with a shrug of her shoulders, as if she didn’t really care if Raven and Lexa were there or not, but, of course, Octavia knew that was a lie.

Octavia lets out a hum in acknowledgement of Clarke’s answer. “I guess that would be okay.” She answers, but her mind immediately starts running through all of the scenarios that that night could involve. She thinks that this could be her chance to get Lexa to spill her secrets, or at least let her know that she is only there for her own agenda and nothing more.

“Yeah?” Clarke asks, blinded by her friendship with Octavia, and not noticing all of the gears spinning in the shorter woman’s head. Octavia nods. “Great.” Clarke grins, and throws her arm around her friend’s shoulders. “It will be fun. We can play poker, or watch movies or something.” 

Octavia smiles before pulling herself out of Clarke’s embrace, and walking over to the sofa. “What’s for dinner tonight?” She asks, as she plops down in her seat.

“Pizza good with you?” Clarke asks, as she brings her hand to the doorknob of the back door, clearing about to go outside with Finn and Lexa. 

“Fine with me.” Octavia answers. “Want me to call in the order?”

“If you don’t mind, that would be great.” Clarke smiles, opening the door, but before she walks out, “Just get a little bit of everything, but make sure that at least one of the pizzas barely has any cheese. Lexa’s not big on it.” Clarke walks out, clearly not realizing that she kind of already knows Lexa’s pizza order, and Octavia rolls her eyes. She knew that Lexa was definitely weird.

 

//

 

“Woah!” Lexa exclaims with a chuckle, running backwards and trying to catch a ball that Finn lobbed into the air behind her. Unfortunately, she didn’t catch the ball, because she ran smack into something on her backpedal. Or rather, someone. Her body knocked another over, and they both collapses into the freezing snow with a loud groan. “Shit.” Lexa utters when she sits up a bit, and looks down at the blue eyes beneath her. If Clarke heard or noticed Lexa’s breath hitch when their eyes met, she didn’t let on. “Clarke, uh I – I’m so sorry! I didn’t realize – I should have –“ 

“Lexa,” Clarke chuckles, but just barely, because the weight of Lexa on top of her keeps her from doing much else. “It’s fine. I’m fine.” Clarke can’t help but grin when she looks up into green eyes filled with worry that seems to, quickly, fade into a smile on Lexa’s face. God. Clarke doesn’t know how long they lay there, like that, looking like two idiots piled on top of each other in the snow, but she can’t bring herself to care.   
She should be freezing right now. Shivering as the snow seeps into her clothes, but all that she can feel is warmth. From Lexa’s smile. From her eyes. From her body. It seems to keep Clarke’s blood pumping, and her smile on her face from falling.

The two of them are dismantled from their thoughts, when Lexa lets out a loud ‘umph’ and the weight on top of Clarke seems to increase. It only takes a moment later, when she sees Lexa laughing, and Finn’s head pop out from on top of her. “Monkey pile!” He exclaims as he raises his hands in the air, as if victorious. Clarke and Lexa both erupt into a fit of laughter, as Lexa lays her forehead down to meet Clarke’s shoulder and Clarke moves her face, somewhat, into Lexa’s neck as they both continue to laugh. Lexa tries to ignore the shivers, that seem to take over her body, from the blonde’s warm breath against her neck, and Clarke tries to ignore the tantalizing scent from Lexa’s skin.

A moment later, Lexa is rolling off of Clarke and taking Finn with her, tackling him into the snow and running her fingers over his sides to tickle him. “Monkey pile, huh?” Lexa grins, as her fingers continue to tickle the boy and his laughter fills the cool air. Lexa looks over her shoulder as she continues her attack and smiles at Clarke, who is now sitting up and watching with a smile of her own. Lexa nods her head invitingly, telling Clarke to come over and help her. Clarke laughs and crawls through the snow to her son’s side and assists the brunette.

“You thought that you could just jump on top of us without any consequences?” Clarke teases.

“No, mommy!” He yells in between giggles. “Not you too! Yo – you’re supposed to be on my side!” Clarke stops her fingers, then, and so does Lexa so that she can see what Clarke is doing. The blonde leans down and whispers something into Finn’s ear, something that makes him smile and Lexa knows exactly what is happening, now.

“No, no.” Lexa chuckles, as she slowly starts to crawl backwards away from the devious pair. Her hands are raised in front of her, as if in surrender. “Finn, buddy – I thought that we were frie – “ Before she could finish her words, Finn and Clarke both tackle her to the ground and start to tickle her. The snow is so cold, as it seeps in through the material of her clothes, but she doesn’t care, because the four hands attacking her ribs, at this moment, are all that she can think about. She hates being tickled, but her laughter starts to spill out anyway. Clarke and Finn are both giggling too, and Lexa thinks that she can’t remember a time when she was ever this happy. When she was ever this… free.

 

//

 

Octavia headed to bed fairly early, after the group finished eating pizza, saying that she had to get up early in the morning to go into town to finish up her Christmas shopping. Clarke, Finn, Lexa, and Raven were now sitting in the living room watching Netflix. Raven was sat in a recliner on the opposite side of the room, watching on as her best friend kept exchanging smiles with Clarke. It was weird for Raven to see that, but a good weird. Not unwelcomed at all. It was always good to see Lexa like this. It was a rare occasion, to say the least. Clarke was sitting on one end of the couch, and Lexa on the other. Finn was sprawled out in between the two of them with his head in his mother’s lap. His eyes were droopy, and he was fading fast. The events of the day were starting to catch up with him quickly.

Once, he had finally fallen asleep, Clarke paused the current movie and the three women say around in the dimly lit living room, carrying on small talk. Raven talked about her time at MIT, which impressed Clarke, and Lexa spoke about some of hers and Raven’s embarrassing moments in high school. Clarke laughed softly, not wanting to wake her son, who was still snoozing in her lap. Clarke told them about a time, in college, when she and Octavia had almost gotten into a bar fight because Octavia couldn’t keep her hands to herself. “Yeah.” Clarke grinned, as Raven and Lexa laughed quietly. “Turns out, the guy that she was dancing with… he was there with his girlfriend and all of her friends, and the bad thing was… Octavia knew!” Raven and Lexa chuckle again, at Clarke’s expense.

“That’s nothing.” Raven says, jumping back into the conversation. “Our senior year, just before graduation, Lexa’s girlfriend, Costia took us to – “ Raven was interrupted when Lexa cleared her throat and tried to subtly shake her head, telling Raven not to continue with that story. Clarke definitely noticed the interaction, and wondered what the story between Lexa and this, Costia, girl was. She tried to ignore the faint butterflies in her stomach, when Raven confirmed Lexa’s attraction for girls. Clarke had her guesses, sure, but she didn’t know for sure. Now she does. Not that she could ever act on anything.

After a few moments of almost silence, Raven’s phone rings and she quickly exchanges a worrisome look with Lexa, across the room. “Hello?” She answers, keeping her voice quiet, as to not wake up little Finn. “Lincoln?” Raven grins, and looks back up to Lexa who is grinning now too. Raven’s smile doesn’t last long, however, because it is quickly replaced with wide eyes and a slight frown. “Shit. O – okay. Just keep safe, and tell Nyko – yeah. Yeah. I’ll tell her.” She says, glancing up to look at her best friend, and then back down at her lap. “Okay. We’ll talk to soon.” Raven responds to whatever Lincoln had said, and hangs up the phone. “Turn on the news.” Raven says, looking over at the two women who were sitting across from her.

Clarke immediately grabs the remote beside her, and changed the television set over to one of the big national news channels. In the center of the screen, is a large mugshot photo of Lexa, her green eyes seemingly staring right back at them. Clarke, slowly moves, so that if Finn were to wake up, he wouldn’t be able to see the TV right away, and see the person’s face that covers it. The banner under Lexa’s photo reads, ‘Alexandria Woods’ added to FBI’s 10 Most Wanted Fugitives list.’ Lexa stands from her seat, her face not giving her current headspace away. She walks impossibly closer to the television, before she starts to pace back and forth. She knows that that’s not all that Lincoln had told Raven, so she waits. She waits until the next headline pops up on the screen.

Under Lexa’s photo, two smaller photos pop up. They are both men that Clarke has never seen before. One larger, burly man with a large beard and a tattoo on his face, however, his eyes are kind. The other man is younger, and more fit. His head is shaven and his face holds an expression that reminds her a lot of Lexa’s stoic expression, kind of the like the one she’s sporting right now. Clarke notices that the pictures aren’t mugshots, so they must not have been in trouble with the law much, if at all. Another banner pops up, replacing the old one.

‘Hunter and Sykes involved in Woods’ escape. If spotted, call the FBI’s hotline.’

“Fuck.” Lexa groans, bringing her hands to her hair, and keeping her back to Clarke. “Fuck.” She says again, and Clarke can see the rise and fall of the other woman’s breath from her back alone. “How did they even – “

“Lincoln said that one of Nia’s guys saw Nyko in the garage at the Seattle building.” Raven answered before Lexa could finish her question. The shorter woman was now leaning over, with her arms resting against her thighs, her face not much different from Lexa’s at this point. “She must have figured that Lincoln would be working with Nyko. Clearly, she knows that they’re involved with you. With helping you.” Raven sighs. “You know that Nia only used her power to get these photos and headlines out, right? She is trying to flush you out.”

Lexa’s hands fall from her long, brown hair and down until they are propped up on her hips. She spins a little on her feet, lost in thought, and not minding that Raven and Clarke can see the look of distress on her usually stoic face. She lets out a very audible sigh, before reaching for her jacket beside the door and storming out, as if trying to leave her problems behind. 

Raven is, instantly, on her feet. It takes Clarke a bit longer, since her son is still asleep on her lap. Raven can see the look of fear and worry starting to fill the blonde’s features. “It’s going to be fine.” Raven says, softly. She doesn’t know, really, why she is trying to comfort Clarke in this moment. Perhaps, she knows that Lexa would want her to. “She’s going to be fine. I’ll go.” Raven adds, before she also grabs a coat and steps out the door into the darkness of the night, to follow her best friend.

Clarke is left behind to put Finn to bed, and all she can think about is how she can help Lexa. How she can comfort her in this time. Clearly, the two men had been Lincoln and Nyko. The guys that have been helping Raven and Lexa. Now, not only is the whole nation looking for Lexa, but they’re looking for the two men too.

 

//

 

“Lexa!” Raven yells, as she wraps her coat around her small body, tightly. “Stop!” To her surprise, Lexa does stop. She stops and falls to her knees in the snow. Raven round her, quickly, and kneels down in front of her. Lexa is on the verge of a panic attack, and Raven uses her hands to, softly, brush over the other woman’s arms. “Shh… Hey,” Raven utters. “It’s going to be okay.”

“No.” Lexa lets out in between heaving breaths. “This is all my fault. Lincoln and Nyko, they – I can’t,” Lexa looks down and grasps at the snow beneath her knees, refusing to meet her best friend’s eyes. “Now they’re in trouble too.” She finally says. “I can’t allow this to go on.” Lexa’s breathing is almost back to normal, but the unshed tears in her eyes, glisten in the moonlight reflecting from the snow.

“Lincoln and Nyko knew what they were doing when they signed on for this, Woods.” Raven says as she brings her hands to her friend’s shoulders. “They know what they’re doing now. They won’t get caught, and we are going to catch this bitch at something and send her away for a really long time.”

“We have to end this, Raven.” Lexa finally breathes out and even breath, as she stands up, slowly. “This has to be over with. I can’t continue to hurt people that I care about. You, Lincoln, Nyko, Clarke, Finn… this can’t happen to anyone else.” The mention of Clarke and Finn did not go unnoticed by neither Raven or Lexa, but neither of them say a thing.

“We will.” Raven replies, assuredly. “Let’s go back in, yeah? It’s fucking freezing out here.” Raven grins, causing a slight one to form on Lexa’s face, as well.

 

//

 

Lexa, once back inside, makes her way to Clarke’s bedroom. All of the lights in the house are out, and she figures that the blonde has already put Finn to bed. She opens the door to the bedroom, quietly, not wanting to wake up Clarke if she’s asleep. The only light on in the room, is the small lamp that sits on the nightstand on Clarke’s side of the bed. The blonde is setting up, on the edge of the bed, with her feet dangling over the edge. When she hears the door creak a bit, her blue eyes look up instantly to meet green ones, and she lets out a breath that she didn’t realize that she was holding. 

Clarke leaves her seat on the bed, and gets up to walk over to Lexa and pulls her into a hug. Lexa is taken aback at first, but quickly finds that this is the most comforting thing that she’s felt in a while. At least, since the first time that Clarke had hugged her. Lexa’s arms wraps around the blonde’s back, as Clarke’s are around Lexa’s neck. Lexa doesn’t know how long that they’ve been standing in the middle of Clarke’s bedroom, just clutching onto each other like this. Like they are each some sort of lifeline for the other. It feels like hours have passed by, yet she’s still not ready to let go.

“It’s going to be okay.” Clarke mumbles into the material of Lexa’s jacket. “It’s going to be alright.”

Lexa finds herself nodding, even though she doesn’t completely believe it. She brings herself to, slowly, let go of Clarke and the blonde does the same. Once blue eyes are pulled back enough to see Lexa, wholly, Clarke’s face warms with a small smile.

“Why are you helping me?” Lexa utters, almost too softly to hear. “You owe me nothing.” The brunette is shaking her head, as if she can’t comprehend why someone would ever be this nice to her. Clarke is perfect. Lexa knows this, and has for a while now, but she’s still taken aback by her generosity and selflessness every day.

“I just – I,” Clarke is clearly struggling with her words now, because she doesn’t know what to say without, possibly, revealing feelings that she doesn’t want revealed. “You’re special, Lexa. I – I just, I want to help you. I feel like I am supposed to do this.”

Lexa is thrown off by Clarke’s response. It was simple, yet so sincere, and the brunette feels her heart warm from Clarke’s words. Lexa nods, with a small hint of a smile, before Clarke starts to make her way back over to the bed. Lexa removes her coat, and hangs it on the back of the door. She then grabs her pajamas and makes her way to Clarke’s connecting bathroom to change. When she exits, she thinks that Clarke has fallen asleep, so she makes her way to the blanket pallet that she, Clarke and Finn had made a few nights ago. She snuggles in, enjoying the warmth of the blankets and Clarke’s room, before she hears the blonde’s sweet voice.

“Goodnight, Lexa. Tomorrow, we will work together to fix this.”

Lexa smiles, in the darkness of the room, knowing that no one can see her. She’s never felt a need this strong. A need to be so close to another person. She wishes that she could just pile up in the bed with Clarke and latch onto her like some sort of koala, and she knows that the blonde wouldn’t object, but she can’t bring herself to do it.

“Goodnight, Clarke.”

 

//

 

When Lexa wakes the next morning, she already knows that it’s later than she usually sleeps. She can tell by the way that the light from the sun, outside, isn’t as bright and blinding as it usually is when she wakes.   
She sits up and rubs the heels of her hands into her eyes, remembering everything that took place the previous night. Lincoln and Nyko were now being hunted, as well. No one was safe around her. No one was   
safe to help her. She couldn’t let this go on. She had to find a way to bring an end to it all.

Lexa stands up, from her bed on the floor, and stretches her long arms out above her head, as she yawns. She notices that Clarke is not in her bed, so Lexa grabs a pair of her own jeans and throws them on, before opting for a hoodie as well. She ties her long hair back into a messy bun, and leaves the room, thinking that she’ll find everyone in the living room and kitchen.  
She doesn’t. She only finds Octavia and Finn.

“Lexa!” The young boy grins from ear to ear when the taller woman enters the room. She returns his smile, although she feels as if it were a little sleepy. 

“Hey, buddy.” Lexa responds, glancing out of the corner of her eye, seeing that Clarke’s friend is giving her a death glare, but Lexa tries to ignore it as she pulls Finn in for a quick hug. “What are you doing?”

“Aunt Octavia is going to help me build a new puzzle.” He smiles, warming Lexa’s heart, as per usual. “Want to help?”

“Maybe later.” Lexa replies softly, her green eyes darting around the area in search of Raven or Clarke. She doesn’t see either of them. “Where are the others?” She asks, but this time her eyes find Octavia, who really doesn’t look like talking to Lexa, but she does anyway.

“Clarke is down stairs, helping your friend with something.” The contempt in the shorter woman’s voice is palpable, and Lexa wants nothing more than to sit down and have a nice little chat with the new person in the house, but she can’t. Not with Finn here, and not before talking to Clarke about it. So, instead of starting, yet another argument, Lexa nods at Octavia and turns on her heels towards the basement door.

She realizes, halfway down the steps, that it’s very quiet down in the basement, and most of the lights are off. When she reaches the final landing, she notices that the only light is coming from the four computer screens that are lit up in front of her blonde savior. She smiles, knowing that Clarke can’t see her as she takes in the sight of how gorgeous the blonde looks. Clarke’s in sweatpants and a long sleeve t-shirt, with her hair in a low, messy bun and a pair of glasses that Lexa hasn’t seen the girl wear before. They look perfectly adorable on her, and Lexa’s smile grows.

Lexa, then, sees her best friend sprawled out on the sofa behind the computers, fast asleep. That must be why the lights are off and why it’s so quiet down here. She chuckles, lightly, not actually believing that Raven is sleeping and allowing Clarke to mess around with her equipment.

“Clarke.” Lexa utters, softly. “Clarke.” She says again, as she gets closer behind the blonde. It’s then when she realizes that Clarke has a pair of earbuds in her ears, and Lexa decides to lay a gentle hand onto one of the woman’s shoulders, not wanting to scare her. As soon as she does, however, Clarke brings a hand up to grab onto Lexa’s and squeezes her fingers tightly, causing Lexa to let out a yelp, and her knees to bend slightly in pain. Clarke is off of the stool, in a matter of seconds as she spins around on Lexa. Both women’s eyes are wide, and Clarke loosens her grip on Lexa’s fingers before yanking her headphones out. 

“Lexa… holy shit.” The blonde’s voice is still quiet, attempting to keep Raven asleep for as long as possible, and out of her hair. “I’m so sorry. You – I wasn’t expecting you to – “ Clarke lets out a groan, and a small grin forms on Lexa’s face. 

“Clarke.” Lexa chuckles, lightly. “It’s fine. You’ve got a damn fine grip, though.”

The blonde’s face is blushed, Lexa can tell, even in the dimness of the computer lighting. Lexa starts to wonder how long it will take Clarke to realize that she is still holding her hand, rolling her thumb gently of the top of Lexa’s hand. Lexa certainly wasn’t going to pull away.

“What are you doing down here?” The taller woman asks, with a smile. “Does she know you’re here?” Lexa says, using her head to point over to Raven, who clearly wasn’t bothered by Lexa’s yelp a few moments ago. The woman’s mouth is hanging wide open and Lexa chuckles at the sight.

“She does.” Clarke replies, and that’s when she notices that she’s still holding Lexa’s hand, so she gently lets go without making a big fuss about it. Clarke moves around, moving back to take her seat on the stool, facing the screens. “I kind of threatened her.” Clarke shrugs, and this makes Lexa’s eyes go wide in surprise.

“You what?” Lexa laughs.

“She told me that she didn’t want me messing with her stuff,” Clarke replies, grabbing onto the mouse and scanning over a few different files as she speaks. “And I told her that this was my house, and that if she didn’t let me help, then I knew someone that could kick her ass.” Lexa finds herself laughing hysterically at this, for some reason. She can see Raven’s face, a mix of emotions, between confusion and anger and shock. She wishes that she could have been down here for that.

“So,” Lexa says, walking up beside the seat, where Clarke sits. “Who is this person that could kick Raven’s ass? She’s pretty tough, you know?”  
Clarke shrugs again. “I might have been thinking about you when I said it, but I was really just winging it.” The blonde grins, as she continues to gaze over file after file on different screens at a time, her eyes never looking towards Lexa.

Was that supposed to mean something? Clarke was thinking about her? Lexa is fairly certain that the blonde meant absolutely nothing by it, but she couldn’t help but wonder if Clarke might happen to think about her as much as Lexa thinks about Clarke. That would be something, now, wouldn’t it?

“Well, you were right.” Lexa says, leaning in closer to read some of the files with Clarke. “I could definitely kick her ass.” Clarke chuckles, but says nothing else. “You never answered my question, earlier. What are you doing down here?”

“I told you that I was going to help, in any way that I could.” Clarke states like it’s the most obvious thing in the world. “I’m skimming through these old video files. Most of them are surveillance tapes from the night of your parent’s mur –“ Clarke stops herself from finishing that statement, realizing that it might have sounded a little hurtful. “From that night.” She adjusts her words. “Your father had so many cameras around the mansion. It’s insane.”

“You’re helping with this, really?” Lexa asks, finally causing Clarke to look up at her with shining, blue eyes. 

“Of course, Lexa.” Clarke replies, honestly. “Why do you find it so hard to believe that I’m willing to help you? Do you not trust me? Do you think that I’m going to do something completely against you?” Lexa could tell that Clarke was getting a little frustrated, and the brunette knew that she should have stopped asking Clarke those questions, as if she didn’t really believe her, because she did. She believed Clarke more than she’s believed anyone else before, she just still can’t imagine someone like Clarke helping her.

“Clarke, I’m sorry.” Lexa responds, her eyes growing sad, and Clarke realizes that Lexa is cursing herself internally. She immediately feels bad for practically jumping on the brunette’s case. She knows how hard it is for Lexa to admit things to people, and believe that people are willing to help her. “Of course, I trust you. I would never, in a million years, think that you would do something to hurt me. I’m so, so sorry.” Lexa shakes her head frustratingly, and Clarke grabs her hand, this time knowingly. It doesn’t startle Lexa though. She feels like she is so used to Clarke’s touch, now. It feels as if it’s something that she’s felt throughout her entire existence. So calming. So reassuring. So real.

“I’m sorry.” Clarke says, back, echoing Lexa’s own words. “I know how hard it is for you to trust someone. I shouldn’t have – I should –“

“Stop.” Lexa says, running her thumb over Clarke’s hand, both of them feeling as if this is something way too intimate for people in their situation, (People who are supposedly, new friends), but neither of them wanting to pull away. “Stop apologizing to me.”

“Then, you stop apologizing to me.” Clarke tries to say firmly, but her smirk pops out, causing Lexa to grin too. “Can I get back to work now, Miss Woods?”

Lexa’s smile widens, as Clarke’s thumb stops rubbing circles, but the blonde doesn’t let go. “Sure thing, Miss Griffin. I’m going to go get some coffee. Want some?”

“Please.” The blonde, answers with a smile, letting go of Lexa’s hand finally and returning her gaze towards the computers. Lexa turns her back, trying to hide how big her smile is, and walks up the stairs towards the kitchen.

 

//

 

Hours later, Lexa finds herself seated on a stool beside the blonde’s. The both of them have been staring at all of the different screens for hours, trying to find something, anything, that looks odd or out of place that night at the mansion. Lexa can see that Clarke’s blue eyes are becoming tired and droopy, from staring practically all day. Her heart warms when she thinks about their conversation earlier, and how Clarke’s been so adamant about helping her. “How about you go upstairs and we call it a day?” Lexa asks, clearing the comfortable silence that they’ve been sitting in for the past half hour. “I’ll finish up down here and then I can make us some dinner, yeah?”

“You don’t have to do that.” Clarke yawns, stretching her arms atop her head. “I can g – “ Clarke stops mid-sentence, as her eyes begin to squint and she leans closer to the screens to search through the darkness of the videos. Lexa must sense that Clarke has seen something strange, and she leans forward as well, matching Clarke’s pose. After several clicks of the mouse, Clarke has zoomed in on one screen, her ass has left the stool that she was sitting on, and she’s now squatting in front of the computer.

“What is it? What did you see?” Lexa asks softly, wondering what in the world Clarke could have spotted that she, herself, didn’t see. She doesn’t realize how badly her heart is thumping, until she’s fairly sure that she’s having a mild heart attack.

“Go,” Clarke starts, without looking over to Lexa, her eyes to focused on her current task. “Get Raven.” Without hesitation, Lexa stands, and jogs up the wooden steps of the basement, and in no time, she’s back down with her best friend beside her.

Raven walks over to the desk, to prop her hands on the table and try to spot what Clarke thinks that she saw. “What is it?” The dark-headed woman asks, and Clarke immediately takes her index finger and points to the screen, where she has now paused the video. It’s dark, and almost impossible to see, Lexa isn’t sure how Clarke spotted it in the first place. There’s a hand. A hand sticking out, in the very far left corner of the screen. It’s gloved, but there’s a slight glimpse of a watch visible. “Is that – what camera is that?” Raven continues, once she’s spotted what the blonde has pointed out.

“Camera 7. Near the back entrance.” Clarke replies. “Raven, I need you to pull up the traffic light cameras in the area. The house was near a highway, correct?”

“Yeah.” Raven plops down on a stool and sets to work on the computer. Her fingers are flying across the keys, impossibly fast. While Raven works on that, Clarke stands from her squatted position and walks over to Lexa, who is wide eyed and frozen.

“What is it?” Clarke asks quietly, bringing her hand to rest on Lexa’s bicep, lightly. The question is soft, and personal, as if it were only Lexa and Clarke in the room. 

“Nothing.” Lexa responds, shaking her head to look down at blue eyes, and give off a small grin. “Just – I’m just nervous. I don’t know. This is the first time that anyone has noticed something like that.” 

“Maybe it will pan out to something.” Clarke returns her smile and gives Lexa’s bicep a squeeze before dropping her hand.

“I wish that I would have met you ten years ago.” Lexa jokes, but in all honesty, she wishes that she could have met Clarke ten years ago for a lot more reasons than that. Clarke laughs, clearly not taking anything else into account. She just thought that Lexa was one-hundred percent joking with her.

After a few more minutes of tense silence, other than the sounds of Raven’s fingers clicking the keyboard loudly, she stops. “Okay.” Pointing at the lowest screen, and turning her head to look at Lexa and Clarke. “This would be the camera to watch, if anyone made their escape, later that night, after the exited the forest. If they jumped in a vehicle, then, mostly like, they came through here.”

“So, how do we know what to look for? I mean, it was a gloved hand.” Lexa says, stepping closer to the computers, and her best friend. Clarke slips between them as they chat, quickly pressing play and watching the video.

“We look for the watch.” Clarke answers, before Raven has a chance to. Raven and Lexa take a step back after a few moments, because clearly, Clarke has this whole video thing in the bag. Raven waggles her eyebrows at her best friend, while the blonde, in front of them, continues to sift through hours and hours of traffic video on fast forward. Lexa punches her friend in the arm, signaling for her to stop mocking she and Clarke. “There!” Clarke exclaims after a few more minutes of watching. “That’s the watch!”

“Are you su –“ Raven starts to ask, but is quickly interrupted.

“Yes, I’m sure.” Clarke says seriously, and Lexa smiles at how much Clarke is into helping her. Clarke, clearly, catches Lexa’s smile and throws her a wink before looking back at the computer screen. With her heart now stuck somewhere up in her throat, Lexa squats down too to watch the screen. “See that?” Clarke points at the paused video feed, to where a hand is gripping the steering wheel of a small black SUV. Clarke was right. It’s the same watch, and the person is still wearing the same black gloves.

“Holy shit.” Lexa mutters under her breath. 

“How the fuck did you see that, blondie?” Raven laughs, but is clearly very excited with the new information.

“Eagle eyes.” Clarke shrugs. “Now, Raven, I think that if you can clear this quality up, and zoom in, we can possibly see the face of the person driving the vehicle. The person wearing the watch.”

“Damn, Raven.” Lexa chuckles. “What am I even paying you for? Clearly, I should be paying Clarke.”

Raven gives her best friend a glare, knowing full well that Lexa is just yanking her chain. “I bet that that’s not the only thing that you’d pay her f – “

“Okay.” Lexa says, clapping her hands together, and throwing Raven off of whatever crude statement she was, more than likely, about to make. Lexa hears Clarke chuckle, but refuses to look at her, because she knows that her own face is blood red. Damn her friend. “Can you do it, Raven? I mean, let us see the face driving the vehicle?”

“Of course.” Raven responds, before setting to work, once again.

Lexa lays a soft hand on Clarke’s shoulder on, from behind her. “I’m going to go check on Finn.”

“You sure?”

“Yeah.” Lexa smiles. “I’ll be back shortly.”

Once Lexa is back upstairs and out of hearing range, Raven starts in on her questioning that she’s been holding in for quite some time now. She looks over at the blonde, beside her, who is staring intensely at the screens, her wide, blue eyes focused and calculating. “So,” Raven starts in, not pulling Clarke’s attention from the monitors. “What do you think about Lexa?” The Latina woman flinches a bit at her wording, but doesn’t really know what else she could have said to have gotten her point across.

Clarke, finally, breaks her gaze and looks to Raven with confusion written all of her face. “What do you mean?”

“I don’t know.” Raven shrugs, looking anywhere, but Clarke’s eyes. “You two just seem like you’ve really kind of – bonded or some shit.” Bonded, Raven? Really? “And you’re doing everything you can to help her. That’s a far cry from when you couldn’t even stand to look at her a couple of weeks ago.”

“I - uh, wouldn’t say that we’ve bonded.” Clarke replies softly. “I am just trying to help her. Like you said. I was really shitty to her, and I regret it, so I’m going to do all that I can to make it up to her.”

“You don’t owe her anything, Clarke.” Raven states, matter-of-factly. “You saved her life from that whole gunshot ordeal. That was more than enough.” When Clarke doesn’t respond to Raven, the darker-headed woman notices that she seems to be thinking of what she wants to say next, but the words never come. “I’ve never seen her smile this much.” Raven adds, hoping that will tell Clarke all that she needs to know about this conversation. Blue eyes pop back up again to search Raven’s face, to try and find out what exactly she means by that, and why she’s telling her.

Clarke’s not entirely sure which way this conversation is headed. “That’s good.” The blonde replies, still searching Raven’s eyes for clues of what she’s supposed to be talking about. “I’m sure that she’s very glad to be out of prison, and now to possibly have some sort of lead. That’s got to be somewhat of a weight coming off of her shoulders, right?”

Raven doesn’t mean to. She really doesn’t, but she can’t help herself. She bursts into laughter, taking a break from working on the video quality on the computer. “You – you think that Woods is smiling like that because she’s glad to be out of prison?” Raven is still laughing, and Clarke really wants to punch her in the face, but she’s not going to lie… Raven scares her a bit.

“Well, yes.” Clarke replies with a bit of harshness to her tone. She’s already over talking to Raven at this point. “Why else would she be?”

“You’re kidding me, right?” Raven chuckles. “I’ll give you three guesses, and the last two don’t count.” When Clarke raises a brow in question, the other woman continues on with her teasing. “Starts with a ‘Y’, and ends with a ‘U’.”

Clarke’s not going to lie. She’s more than a little bit taken aback by the statement. There’s no way that Lexa is all smiles because of Clarke. No way in hell. The taller woman is just happy to be out of jail. That’s it, and Lexa just strikes her as a happy person anyway. 

“And I’m sure that that kid of yours has something to do with it too.” The brunette adds.

“Well, that,” Clarke says. “I have no doubt. He’s a great kid. He can make anyone happy.”

“So, then, why do you doubt that you don’t have the same effect on her?” Raven asks, but quickly follows her question up. “I mean, I didn’t know you before everything, but I feel like you’ve been extra smiley, yourself, lately.”

Shit. Now that Clarke thinks about it, she has been. It’s, definitely, not like her at all to have so much joy fill her like this. Finn has been the only thing, in years, to make her happy. He has always been the light in her life, leading her out of the darkness that she sometimes finds herself sinking into when she thinks about his father and her own. How can a stranger, like Raven, notice that she’s been more ‘smiley’ than usual? 

Clarke is fooling herself if she thinks that she doesn’t know the reason for her newfound contentment. She knows that it has everything to do with the stranger, now friend, who came tumbling into her life only a short time ago. A really short time. She knows how much her heart fills with joy, and more warmth than she can ever remember, when she sees Lexa with Finn. Helping him with baseball and puzzles and telling him bedtime stories and making him laugh uncontrollably. That’s something that she hardly ever got to see before those bright, green eyes popped into her world.

And Lexa made Clarke laugh too. They tended to use a lot of sarcasm and witty banter in their conversations, usually making them both fall into a fit of laughter, but they also shared a lot of serious conversations too. Lexa trusted Clarke with telling her everything that had really happened that night, so long ago. Lexa trusts Clarke not to call and rat her out every single second of every single day. 

And Clarke trusts Lexa. More than she’s trusted anyone is so, so long. Which is funny, considering where their ‘relationship’ started.

“Earth to blondie.” Raven’s voice pulls her out of her deep thoughts. “You’re doing it right now.” Shit. Clarke hadn’t realized that she was grinning like a damned moron this entire time, thinking about Lexa. She’s sure that her face is turning a million different shades of red, at the moment.

“So, what?” Clarke asks, a little snappier than she meant. “So, maybe I’ve smiled a lot lately. Maybe it’s just because I am glad to be helping someone innocent take back her life.”  
Raven hums. “Maybe, but I highly doubt that’s just it.”

“Can we stop this conversation, please?” The blonde argues, looking back to the computer monitors in front of them. Her face is still red, because she’s been caught. She’s been caught with her feelings for Lexa, that she’s been trying to hide. She can’t feel this way. It’s not fair to herself or Lexa, because she knows that Lexa will have to leave. She knows that, more than likely, Lexa won’t have a normal life. At least for a while. Clarke can’t start anything with Lexa, knowing that it’s going to devastate Finn, enough as it is, when the brunette leaves. Much less what it’s going to do to Clarke. She’s sure that she feels her heart crack a bit when she thinks about not seeing Lexa again.

Raven doesn’t say anything else to Clarke then. She knows that she’s overstepped her line, so she turns back to the screens, and continues working on trying to decipher who this mystery driver is. Clarke sits in silence, refusing to look over to Lexa’s friend. She feels so stupid for letting someone see her true feelings. She can’t help herself, though. Lexa is… Lexa. She’s perfect. To Clarke, anyway. She’s gorgeous, intelligent, selfless, funny, sweet, caring… so many things about Lexa have Clarke’s heart strumming and her chest rising quicker the more she thinks about the green-eyed woman.

She’s not sure how long they sit there, as Raven tries to work her magic, but soon enough, Lexa is back. She pats Raven on the back, harder than she really should. “How are things going down here? Any luck?”

“Not yet.” Raven responds, her fingers roaming across the keys of the computer as if that’s what they were made to do.

“How were Finn and Octavia?” Clarke asks, turning her head to look up to Lexa, who was standing beside her. “Everything okay?”

“Everything’s fine.” Lexa smiles. “Octavia still hates me, but other than that,” Lexa shrugs when Clarke’s face shows a sad expression, clearly wishing that her friend would give Lexa a chance like she did. “She and Finn are watching a movie. I called and ordered us some supper. Should be here in an hour or so.”

“What did you get?” Raven quips. “You better not have ordered fucking pizza again.”

“I didn’t get pizza, Reyes.” Lexa rolled her eyes, causing Clarke to chuckle. “I ordered Indian. Finn said that he was okay with that, so I just ordered a bit of everything.”

“Thank you.” Clarke says kindly, resisting the urge to reach out for Lexa’s hand again, but she knows that she has to keep the touchy, feely shit to herself now. At least in front of Raven. Clarke can’t help it though. She’s always been one to touch, rather than say.

“You’re very wel –“

“Got it!” Raven exclaims, running a hand through her ponytail, and interrupting Lexa in the process. “Let’s see who this piece of shit is.” The three woman, all at once, lean in closer. They stare at the face in front of them, and there’s nothing but silence surrounding them. Moments pass by, and it’s as if each of them is waiting for the other to say something. To say that they recognize him, but nothing comes. At least, not for another few seconds, and then the blonde speaks up.

“Isn’t that… Shit.” Clarke says, rubbing her eyes with her hand as she tries to think of a name. “I can’t think of his name.”

“Wait. You recognize him?” Raven asks with a look of shock and disbelief on her face. “I don’t think that I’ve ever seen this guy. Have you, Woods? Any connections with your parents or Nia?”

Lexa shakes her head, and she’s obviously frustrated with herself for not knowing. “No. I don’t remember ever seeing him. Nothing’s coming to mind.” Lexa and Raven look over to Clarke, to see her pulling out her cell phone, seemingly to look up something on the web. After another few moments Clarke smiles and hands her phone over to Lexa, who is between she and Raven. “Holy shit.” Lexa grins. On the phone, there’s a picture of Nia Woods with two men in front of her. They’re her security detail. Her bodyguards. It’s clearly, a paparazzi picture and it’s old. At least several years. 

“That must be from around the time that all of this shit was going on.” Raven says. “I remember the press following her around everywhere after you were indicted.” She looks to Lexa, who nods.

“His name is Carl Emerson.” Clarke says. “I remember now. There was a lot of controversy over her hiring him back then. The press said that he had been involved in several petty crimes before he went to work for Woods Inc.”

“How the hell do you remember that?” Raven asks.

“I have no idea.” Clarke chuckles and shakes her head. “I guess that it was just one of those things that you see it, and then something inside you clicks.”

“This is great!” Raven exclaims, looking to Lexa and patting her friend on the shoulder, rather hard. “Our first lead in ages. I’ve got to call Lincoln and Nyko. Get them started on finding this tool.” Raven gets up and pulls her cell phone out of her pocket and walks to the farthest corner of the basement to call Lincoln. 

Clarke sees that Lexa is being quiet, which surprises her a bit, seeing as they just caught someone, closely linked to Nia, near Lexa’s house the night of the crime. She thought that Lexa would be thrilled. She thought that Lexa would at least smile, but none comes. The brunette only stares down at Clarke’s phone, eyes still transfixed on the photo of Nia and the two men. Clarke knows that she shouldn’t, but she throws all cares out the window and leans over, wrapping an arm through Lexa’s. Finally, Lexa looks to her. “Talk to me.” Clarke says softly, again like it’s just the two of them in the room. “Tell me what’s going on in your head.”

Lexa shakes her head, and Clarke sees a look of anger wash over Lexa’s beautiful features. She notices the other woman’s fingers tightening their hold on Clarke’s phone, as she stares back down at it. “This could be him.” Lexa, finally, replied. “This could be the guy that – that killed my parents.” Lexa is twenty-eight years old. She’s a grown woman, but in this moment, she’s an eighteen-year-old again. That night flashes through her mind, as if it were only yesterday. She forgets where she is, in the moment. All that she sees is red. She’s angry. She’s livid, and with good reason. Very good reason. Her palms begin to sweat, and Clarke feels the muscles in Lexa’s arm tense up. Clarke sees tears, build in the brunette’s lovely eyes, but she doesn’t allow them to fall. She’s too angry to let that happen. She can’t think about the sadness and the loss of her parents right now. In her enraged state, all she can think about is what she will do if she ever gets her hands on Carl Emerson. 

“Lexa.” Clarke utters as she tightens her arm around Lexa’s. “We are going to get him. He will pay for what he’s done, and so will Nia.”

Green eyes, suddenly, meet blue, and the red seems to fall away slowly from Lexa’s vision. “I –,” Lexa can’t find her words, clearly struggling, and Clarke can see now that what the woman, beside her, was feeling angry. Of course she was. “I want to kill him.”

“No.” Clarke replies quickly, shaking her head and squeezing Lexa’s arm, yet again. Almost as if she knew that that were coming. “That’s not you.”

“But it’s what I feel. I can’t not think about it, Clarke. He killed my parents.” Lexa says, standing up, suddenly and knocking her stool down. Of course, Clarke is immediately up, as well. Raven definitely sees everything. She finds it strange that the two of them seem to move as one. “He took their life and then he took mine. They both did. This piece of shit,” She says, pointing at the screen. “And my aunt. My parents didn’t deserve this.”

Clarke, without caring what it looks like, instantly wraps her arms around Lexa’s neck. This woman, that right now is a slew of emotions wrapped in one, but is stronger than anyone she’s ever met. This woman that’s been through so much, but yet, she’s still loving and selfless. This woman who is slowly making her way through the tiny crevasses in Clarke’s heart, filling up spaces where something else used to be. 

After a moment, Lexa wraps her arms around Clarke’s midsection and squeezes, causing Clarke to pull her closer. “I know that everything is fucked up right now.” Clarke says quietly into Lexa’s ear. “I know that you have so many thoughts running through your mind, and I can’t imagine how you’re dealing with it all, but that’s not you.” Clarke declares. “You’re not a killer. He will get what is coming to him, but it won’t be from you, okay?” Seconds pass, before she feels Lexa nod against her. 

The pair stands there for a few minutes, with Clarke running a hand up and down Lexa’s back, to calm her. Raven finally walks up and speaks, breaking them apart. “Lincoln is on it. He says that they will find him.” Lexa nods and yawns.

“Thank you both for helping.” Lexa shows a tired smile. “Words can’t express anything. I owe you both so, so much.”

“You owe us nothing.” Raven says firmly. “That’s what friends are for.”

“That’s what friends are for.” Clarke echoes, almost in a whisper.

 

//

 

Later that night, Clarke is lying in her bed, in the darkness that fills her bedroom. It’s quite, but not uncomfortable. Lexa is lying on the floor in her cocoon of blankets and pillows, and Clarke thinks that she might be asleep. She hasn’t heard her move in a while. The blonde takes a chance, anyway. She thinks that it’s time that she shared some things with Lexa, too. “I lost someone too.” Clarke basically whispers into the overwhelming darkness. A couple of minutes pass, and no response comes. She turns on her side and closes her eyes, but then she feels the bed sink beside her and she opens her eyes slowly. 

Even in the darkness, green eyes sparkle and warm her soul. The ends of Clarke’s mouth turn up a small bit and she wants nothing more than to lean in. She wants Lexa. They are both a mess. They are both scared. She knows this, but she doesn’t care. She’s never felt this way about anyone before. They both lie there, wondering what it is that they’re doing. They both know that whatever is going on, is more than just some friendship. Two strangers that meet and learn to like each other for a while, before they go their separate ways to never see each other again. That’s not what this is. At least, Clarke hopes that it isn’t.

“Will you tell me about them?” Lexa asks finally, her hand coming up to brush a strand of hair behind Clarke’s ear. “You don’t have to know, but whenever you want to talk… I’m here.”

A sigh and then a whisper. “I want to.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> What did you think? Let me know in the comments below, and feel free to leave kudos. ;)
> 
> Love you, guys!
> 
> Follow me on Twitter @asuzh90
> 
> Also, I named this chapter after a line from Christina Perri's 'Distance'. I feel like that song is pretty much Clarke and Lexa's relationship right now.


	9. The Most Unexpected Person

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey, guys! Sorry it's been a while since the last update. I'm usually quicker than this, but life's been a little bit hectic. I hope that you all enjoyed your holidays! Here we go....

“You don’t have to now, but whenever you want to talk… I’m here.”

“I want to.”

//

When Clarke speaks those words, Lexa can tell that the blonde in front of her is scared, or maybe it’s just sorrow. Lexa can’t tell. Maybe a bit of both. 

Both of Lexa’s hands are now tucked under the pillow that her head rests on; her eyes fixated on Clarke’s, waiting for her to start whenever she wants. This is all completely up to her. The ball is in her court.

“Finn is named after his father.” Clarke starts in, her voice barely loud enough for Lexa to hear, but the brunette can pick up the wavering in her voice as it finds its way through the darkness. Clarke’s eyes haven’t met Lexa’s, and Lexa can tell that the woman across from her, is already attempting to hold back her tears. “Finn Collins. That’s was his father’s name, and I loved him very much.” Lexa has several questions coating the tip of her tongue already, but she refrains from asking them right now. She wants Clarke to be able to get everything out that she wants to say. “We moved out here from L.A. The both of us looking to start a life of our own, together. After a couple of months, I found out that I was pregnant. I was terrified, but Finn was so excited, so I couldn’t help but not be as well.” Clarke smiles to herself, in the dark, at the memory. Lexa doesn’t miss it though. She loves Clarke’s smile. Even the small, troubled ones. Clarke clears her throat, her tiny grin quickly leaving her face. “About a month after we found out that we were expecting, my father flew out here to see us and help us get everything set up for the baby. My father was the greatest man that I have ever known.” She adds, like she felt like that should be included. “He would have loved you.” Clarke smiled, finally looking up from the sheets under her, bringing her eyes up to meet Lexa’s. “I think the two of you would have gotten along really well.”

Lexa smiles at the sentiment, but still can’t bring herself to say anything. The fact that Clarke is speaking about Finn and her father in the past tense, does not go unnoticed, and it makes her heart ache at the possibilities.

“Anyway,” The blonde clears her throat again, turning on her back so that she can look up at the ceiling. “Finn left work one day to go by the airport and pick up my dad.” There was quite a bit of silence after that. 

Clarke lay there, her eyes focused on the popcorn ceiling that she could barely make out in the dark. She felt her throat constrict and her eyes begin to burn. She hasn’t talked about this to anyone in such a long time. The blackness of the bedroom seems to help her push through it, though; giving her an extra ounce of courage. “They were – there was an accident. They never made it back.” She croaks out. She turns her head after a few seconds to meet green eyes. “My dad and Finn.” Clarke cried, shaking her head and rolling her eyes at herself for being such a mess. “I lost both of them. The two most important people in my life – just… they were gone. Just like that.”

Then, the woman that seemed unbreakable, broke. Lexa scoots closer, wrapping her arms tightly around the blonde beside her. This woman, that has given her so much comfort and happiness over the past several days, is suffering now. Lexa had no clue. She had no idea about Finn’s father and Clarke’s own. Her heart shatters when she hears Clarke’s muffled sobs, as the other woman nuzzles her face into the bend where Lexa’s shoulder and neck meet. Lexa attempts to rake long, golden hairs out of Clarke’s face, tucking them back behind her ear as she does. 

Lexa doesn’t know what to say. She knows, from personal experience, that there is nothing that anyone can say to make anything like this better. There’s just not. She can’t help but think how she and Clarke both lost the two most important people to them. The two people that they loved more than anything else on this earth. Gone. Just like that.

The taller woman finds herself stroking Clarke’s hair; trying to do anything to soothe her as best as she can. She knows how strong that Clarke is, and that, more than likely, she never gives herself a chance to just cry and let it out. Lexa will give her that. She can be here for her now. It’s the least that she can do for everything that Clarke has done for her. Lexa pulls Clarke tighter into her own body, and lays her chin on top of Clarke’s blonde hair. She doesn’t know how long that they lay there for, she only knows that she doesn’t care. She would lie there for an eternity, with this woman, if she could.

After a while, Clarke’s breathing has evened out, and the tears have, seemingly, stopped flowing. Lexa feels Clarke loosen her grip on her shirt, from where her hands had fisted the material tightly. A blonde head tips back, slightly, looking up to meet Lexa’s eyes. They’re at an awkward angle, but Lexa can still see blue. She can see that Clarke looks embarrassed, and she has absolutely nothing to be embarrassed about. Lexa has broken down too many times with Clarke already. This was nothing.

“I’m sorry.” Clarke says weakly, rubbing her eyes, trying to rid herself of the lingering, unwanted tears. “I didn’t mean to – I just…”

“Clarke.” Lexa interrupts. “I thought that we agreed to stop apologizing to each other.”

“Oh.” The blonde whispers. “I’m sorr – Shit.” She catches herself, and Lexa chuckles, shaking Clarke’s head as her body moves from her laughter. Clarke lets out a little chuckle too, and playfully smacks Lexa’s arm. 

A couple of more moments of comfortable silence, and Lexa speaks. “I would really like to hear about them sometime.” Clarke’s brow quirks up, as if she weren’t sure as to what Lexa was talking about. “Your dad and Finn.” Lexa clears up. “If you wouldn’t mind. I really would love to know more about them.” Lexa knows that Clarke doesn’t need any ‘I’m sorrys’ or anything of that nature. If she’s anything like Lexa, then she absolutely doesn’t want anyone to apologize to her for losing loved ones. From the smile that Clarke sported, as she talked about her father and Finn earlier, Lexa could tell that Clarke loved to have someone to talk about them to. She could be that person, if that’s what Clarke needed.

“I’d like that.” Clarke smiles, both of them not realizing that they are still only inched apart. Lexa’s arms are still wrapped around Clarke, and Clarke finds herself clutching onto Lexa’s sleep shirt, once more, when she feels the brunette start to roll out of bed. Lexa turns her head to look back at Clarke, as if to ask… ‘Did you need something else’. Clarke’s eyes bore into Lexa’s, silently pleading with the woman not to leave her. Not tonight. Clarke knows that she will never sleep, with everything that is on her mind. When something like this happens, she needs to feel someone close to her. She needs Lexa to stay. “Will you – will you please stay?”

At first, Lexa isn’t quite sure as to what Clarke is talking about. The question almost seemed a bit open-ended… like Clarke was talking about staying here in this house with her and not leaving, but she knows that that’s not right. “In the bed?” Lexa attempts to clarify the question, and Clarke nods her head, as she bites her bottom lip between her teeth. Lexa feels her heart flutter at how gorgeous Clarke is. She doesn’t think that she will ever get over her beauty. “Of course, Clarke.” She replies, knowing that she really shouldn’t. She’s contradicting everything that she said that she wouldn’t do. She said that she wouldn’t get close to Clarke like this. That it would be too hard to leave her, even if they are just friends. She hasn’t had someone this close in too long, and this is Clarke… so she pushes all of her worries about everything else away. “Whatever you need.”

Lexa wraps her arms back around Clarke, as the blonde’s hands keep hold on Lexa’s sleep shirt, tightly, as if she thinks Lexa will leave her. They adjust their heads to where they’re most comfortable; with Clarke’s on Lexa’s shoulder, with the brunette’s cheek pressed against the crown of Clarke’s head.

It doesn’t take long until both of their breathing has become even, and their bodies have become still. They both sleep more soundly than they have in so long, neither of them caring about the consequences of their closeness.

At least not for the night.

 

//

 

Morning comes, and with it, comes the sun in all of its luminous glory. It’s filling up the room as Lexa’s green eyes open, and she realizes where she is. Once again, she’s found herself wrapped up in her blonde redeemer. After the first time, she shouldn’t have allowed for it to happen again, but Clarke’s pleading, blue eyes were really the only incentive that she needed for staying. Lexa is weak for this woman, and she’s never been one to be weak. Something about Clarke exposes her vulnerability and she’s terrified at this feeling.

Lexa looks down, slightly, trying to keep as still as possible. Clarke is still asleep and she looks stunning, as per usual. Lexa can’t conceal a light chuckle that leaves her lips when she sees the blonde’s position.   
Clarke’s lying on her stomach, legs and arms splayed open, with of her arms being tossed across Lexa’s stomach. Clarke’s full lips are parted, and Lexa can hear her sleepy breaths. 

It doesn’t take long until Lexa feels Clarke shift a little beside her, and cobalt eyes pop open to meet Lexa’s. Clarke dons a small, sleepy grin before rolling over on her side and stretching her limbs as far as she can. “You’re not going to hound me for staring?” Lexa teases, poking fun at how they always seem to catch each other staring while they’re asleep.

Clarke lets out a quiet chuckle and looks to Lexa once she’s finished stretching. “No. I think that we should both just admit that we are creepers.”

“Hey. I’m not a creep.” Lexa says, poking her tongue out at the blonde. “You on the other hand - “ She doesn’t get to finish before Clarke pops her on the stomach. The hit wasn’t hard at all, but it was enough to make Lexa flinch, as Clarke grazed her still healing gunshot wound.

“Shit, Lexa.” Clarke mutters and sits up automatically. Her eyes are wide and she feels terrible for forgetting about Lexa’s injury. “I’m so, so sorry! Are you okay? Did I hurt you?”

“It’s fine, Clarke.” Lexa answers, moving slightly so that her back is somewhat pressed up against the headboard. Clarke doesn’t miss the brunette wincing, and automatically grasping at her side. Lexa throws   
Clarke a soft smile, trying to reassure her friend that she’s fine. “I’m fine. Don’t worry. It was a mistake.”

“Let me see it.” Clarke argues, and when Lexa doesn’t respond, she pushes again. “Now, Lexa.”

The brunette rolls her eyes and groans. This woman is going to be the death of her. “Clarke, I’m fine. Really. We don’t have to do this again. It’s embarrassing.” Lexa admits.

“What’s embarrassing?” Clarke asks, raising a brow in response. “Me looking at your stomach?”

“Yes.” She answers, not knowing really why she told Clarke that it was embarrassing in the first place. Lexa just doesn’t know if she can handle being alone with Clarke again, shirtless, while the blonde runs her fingers over her body. It’s very… distracting, to say the least.

Clarke clicks her tongue. “Oh. Grow up, Woods.” Lexa can tell that she’s teasing. “Shirt.” Clarke barks. “Now.”

“You’re so fucking commanding in the morning.” Lexa groans, giving in and lifting her shirt off of her body in the process.

“Get over it.”

Clarke takes her time looking over Lexa’s wound. “It looks really good. It’s almost through healing, I would say. Even though, I’m sure that it’s still sore.”

“Yeah.” Lexa responds, tightening her abs as she feels Clarke run her fingers softly over the skin there. She tries to hide the fact that her breath got caught in her throat, but Clarke must catch it because she retracts her hand almost immediately. “Feels like I got hit by a bullet or something.”

“Smartass.” Clarke grumbles as she slides off of the bed. “Stay. I’ll be right back.”

Clarke tosses on a hoodie over her pajamas and makes her way into the kitchen to retrieve some Advil or something for Lexa’s slight discomfort. She grins the whole way down the hallway, as she thinks about her night wrapped in long, toned arms. Her eyes still feel swollen from her crying the night before, but somehow, she feels better. It feels good to talk about her father and Finn to someone, and the fact that Lexa asked to hear more about them, only makes her heart soar higher. Clarke knows that she’s in very treacherous territory. The way that her heart beats erratically when Lexa smiles at her. The way that every time Lexa’s skin brushes against her, in some way, her breathing quickens. The way her mind wanders to very inappropriate scenarios anytime Lexa has her shirt off. She can’t help it, though, and she wonders if Lexa feels the same way, or if she’s alone in this.

“Morning, Sunshine.” Octavia calls from the refrigerator when she spots Clarke walking into the room.

“Momma!” Finn exclaims, running and jumping into her arms.

“Morning, sweetie.” Clarke mumbles as she kissed the top of her son’s head. “Sleep good?”

“Yes, ma’am.” He answers sweetly, before unwrapping his arms and going back to his seat at the counter, where he was eating breakfast. “Did you?” He asks.

Clarke immediately feels her cheeks redden, knowing that she slept the best that she has in a long time, and it was all because she shared her bed with the person that’s been living with her for the past two weeks.   
Of course, she can’t tell Finn that, and especially Octavia. “I did.” She answers honestly. Short and sweet.

“Aunt Octavia has to go to town. Can I go too?”

Clarke looks over to her best friend and Octavia answers her silent question. “Just to get a few groceries and I have a few more gifts to buy.”

“You can go, Finn.” Clarke answers. “That’s fine. Just mind Octavia and be sweet.”

“Yes, ma’am.”

“Count me in too.” Raven’s voice sounds from behind them all, as she makes her way to sit down beside Finn at the counter bar.

“Hell no.” Octavia replies, spinning around so quickly, that she almost gave herself whiplash.

“Swear jar!” Finn and Raven yell in unison.

Octavia groans before digging in her jean pockets for a quarter. She tosses one to Finn, who barely catches it. “Why do you have to go into town?” Octavia asks the annoying Latina girl. “Whatever it is, I can just pick it up.”

“No can do, your highness.” Raven says, stealing a piece of bacon off of Finn’s plate and popping it into her mouth. “I have to buy a few electronics and you will never be able to find the right ones.”

“Clarke?” Octavia says. “Want to come?” Octavia is practically begging Clarke to come with them, now. She does not want to go with Raven. The woman is annoying as hell, and the least amount of time that she has to spend with her, the better.

“No, thanks.” Clarke grins, knowing full well that her best friend wanted her to come to be a buffer between she and Raven. Clarke walks over to the medicine drawer and grabs a couple of Advil, and then retrieves a bottle of water from the fridge. 

“Got a headache, momma?”

“No. Lexa isn’t feeling too great.” She answers as best as she can, knowing that she can’t tell Finn that Lexa is recovering from a gunshot wound, and has more than likely, been doing way too much. Raven looks at Clarke with worried eyes, and the blonde subtly motions to her stomach area and Raven gets it then. “I’m going to just stay here with her. Make sure that she’s okay.”

“Okay.” Finn smiles.

“We will be back after while.” Octavia says to Clarke, who is leaning down to give Finn another kiss. Clarke hums in acknowledgement and makes her way back down the hall to her bedroom. Lexa is still lying in bed, and Clarke thinks that she has dozed off again. Her brown hair, cascading over her shoulder and Clarke’s pillow, and all that Clarke can think about is running her fingers through it. 

“You’re staring, you creep.” Lexa says, pulling Clarke out of her thoughts again.

“Damn it!” Clarke exclaims, causing Lexa to fall into a fit of laughter. “I hate you.” The blonde says as she makes her way back into the bed.

“I don’t think that you do.” Lexa says seriously, once her laughter has settled. She has to wipe her eyes from where tears had formed from her hysterics.

“Here.” Clarke says grumpily, handing Lexa the bottle of water and two small pills. When Lexa takes them, Clarke gets under the covers and pulls them up under her chin as she lays on her side, facing Lexa. After Lexa swallows the pills and sets the bottle on the nightstand, she looks down at Clarke with an amused look on her face. 

“You staying in bed all day?”

“Yep.” Clarke replies, adding a small pop to the ‘p’. “Will you? We can talk.”

“Talk?” Lexa asks curiously, ignoring the way her heart quickens when Clarke asks her to stay in bed with her. This isn’t them. Usually, when they’re like this, it’s safe in the darkness of the night. Usually, Lexa feels a little bit more brave at the fact that Clarke can’t see her. This is different. 

Clarke nods. “If you want. Octavia, Raven, and Finn are heading to town.”

“Seriously?” Lexa asks, finding it strange that Raven was going with them, and finding it even more strange that it was just going to be she and Clarke left here. Alone. And in bed, obviously. 

“Are you feeling okay?” Clarke asks, quickly picking up on the odd look written all over Lexa’s face. “Because, I mean – I can leave you alone if you want. Give you some space.” Lexa rolls her eyes teasingly at the blonde and plops back down into the bed, but making sure to stay on top of the covers, and not underneath them with Clarke.

“Tell me about Finn.” Lexa says. “Big Finn.”

Clarke was a little taken aback by the suddenness of the question, but it’s not unwelcomed. A small smile forms on her lips and she nuzzles further into her pillow. “He was good. Too good. He grew up in a well to do family, just like me. We were both from L.A., but we attended different high schools. Met in college. My mother approved of him because of who his parents were. She thought that they would make great benefactors to her hospital.” Clarke rolls her eyes, clearly there is some disdain there, Lexa notices. “We were together for almost three years when he was offered a supervising position for one of the country’s largest agricultural plants, which is about half an hour from here. That’s why we moved out here. We were going to start a life together. A family. He wanted that so badly. He was so excited about me being pregnant.” Clarke looks saddened and for good reason. “I see so much of him in little Finn. It’s crazy.” Clarke grins a bit. “It’s like there’s a piece of him still with me.”

“Well, I didn’t know Finn, but if he was anything like little Finn, then I’m sure he was an amazing guy.” Lexa smiles. “He would have had to have been to be with someone like you.” Lexa’s smile widens when Clarke blushes heavily at her additional statement.

“Thank you.” Clarke responds shyly.

“Was he in medical school too, at one point?” Lexa asks. Clarke had forgotten about telling Lexa that she started out in medical school but dropped out to become an artist, which clearly didn’t work out.

“No.” Clarke chuckles, thinking of Finn as a nurse or a doctor. “He was way too squeamish. He was in business school. His parent’s always pushed him, like my mother pushed me.”

“And your mother…” Lexa starts, not sure of how she should word this, or if she should even say anything at all. Clearly, Clarke and her mother did not have a good relationship. “Where is she?”

“I don’t know.” Clarke shrugs under the covers. “I assume she is still in California. I haven’t seen her since my father’s funeral.” Lexa doesn’t say anything, because she doesn’t know what to say. She’s not going to push Clarke to talk about anything that she doesn’t want to talk about. When Clarke sees that Lexa isn’t going to ask anything about her mother, she speaks again. She is appreciative of Lexa’s thoughtfulness on the matter. “She blamed me.”

“For your father’s death?”

“Yes.” Clarke sighs. “He was only here to see me after he found out that I was pregnant. He wanted to be here to help Finn and I set up for the baby.”

“That doesn’t make it your fault.” Lexa says through gritted teeth. She doesn’t know why she feels so protective of Clarke, but she does and there’s nothing that she can do to change it. It’s like an instinct to her. Like breathing. “She shouldn’t have said that.” Lexa added, shaking her head.

“It’s okay.” Clarke replies. “Her words didn’t affect me. I knew that my father wanted to be here and would have no matter what. My mother and I have never had a good relationship.”

“What was your father’s name? Tell me about him.” Lexa tries changing the subject and Clarke’s smile warms her heart. Clarke loves that Lexa is trying to get to know more about her and her loved ones. She   
loves that Lexa is thinking about her well-being and her mindset, when she has no reason to whatsoever.

“Jake.” Clarke answers. “Well, Jacob, but everyone called him Jake.”

“Ahh…” Lexa hums. “Finn Jacob Griffin.”

Clarke chuckles, remembering the day that little Finn introduced himself to Lexa as she sat on the couch. He had stuck his hand out so surely, and was so proud of his name, knowing that it came from two people who loved him before he was even born. “Yes.”

“What did Jake do for a living?”

“He was in business. He and Finn got along pretty well.” Clarke smiles. “As good as any father can get along with the guy that’s dating his daughter.”

“You said that your father would have loved me.” Lexa utters, remembering their conversation from the previous night. “Are you sure that he had good taste?” She jokes, causing Clarke to laugh. 

“Yes. He was a very good people person. He would have adored you.” Clarke whispered the last part, and brought her bottom lip between her teeth when she saw the grin that Lexa gave her.

“I mean,” Lexa starts. “Of course he would have. What’s not to love?”

“Don’t make me hit you in the stomach again.”

“Tough crowd.” Lexa teases. “They would be proud of you, you know? Finn and Jake. I’m sure that they are looking down over you and little Finn right now, smiling because you’ve been such a great mom to him.”   
Clarke feels tears start to well up in her eyes, and she feels like such a dork for being so emotional, it’s just that hearing something like that, from someone she’s grown to admire and respect… it’s a good feeling. “I didn’t mean to make you cry.” Lexa smiled softly, bringing her hand up and using a thumb to wipe away a tear from Clarke’s soft cheek. “You just deserve to know that. Someone should remind you every day.”   
Lexa feels Clarke lean into her hand, as she continues to stroke the pale flesh under Clarke’s eyes. Lexa can’t help but wish that she could be the one to be here and remind Clarke every day about how amazing she is.

When they’ve stared at each other for far too long, to be considered appropriate, Lexa removes her hand and clears her throat. Clarke wipes her eyes. “Favorite color?” Lexa asks immediately, trying to change the subject. Clarke laughs out loud.

“That’s random.”

“It’s a very important question, Clarke.” Lexa scoffs teasingly. “You can tell a lot about a person from their favorite color.”

“Oh yeah?” Clarke smiles, earning a nod from Lexa. “Well, mine’s green.” For reasons that she’s not sure that she should share. One, is because that reason is staring right at her. “What’s yours?”

“Brown.” Lexa answers, and Clarke’s scrunches her nose in disgust. 

“Brown? Who the hells favorite color is brown?” Clarke laughs and so does Lexa.

“I’m kidding, Griff. Chill. It’s blue.”

“You’re an ass.”

“What did you say about my ass?”

Clarke groans and Lexa laughs again. Clarke can’t help but love Lexa’s laugh and her smile. She also loves when she’s being playful and teasing like this. It’s only one of the sides of Lexa that Clarke has started to fall for. Wait. No. Not fall for. She just really likes Lexa’s playful side. That’s it.

“Favorite food?” Clarke asks, ignoring Lexa’s teasing.

“Pickles.”

“Pickles?”

“Yep. What about you?”

“Pretzels.”

“We have really random favorite foods.” Lexa says and Clarke hums. “Cats or dogs?”

Clarke laughs. “Dogs. No contest.” Lexa raises her hand to give Clarke a high five. “You’re a dork. You know that, right?” Clarke grins, but returns the high five anyway.

“So I’ve been told.” The brunette says as she rolls over onto her back and grabs her phone from the nightstand. Clarke does the same. “Favorite band?”

“Wow. Bringing out the big guns.” Clarke hums. “Let’s see.” The blonde brings a finger up to tap on her chin. “I really like the Civil Wars, but I’m not sure if they’d be my favorite. Maybe Fleetwood Mac.”

“Both excellent choices, Miss Griffin.”

“Yours?” Clarke asks.

“Justin Bieber.”

“You can’t be serious.”

“You’re right. I’m not.” Lexa says, and then begins to think seriously, like Clarke had done earlier. “You can never go wrong with Sinatra, and I really like Louis Armstrong, as well. Oh, and Dean Martin!”

“Nice.” Clarke smiles. “I never pegged you for a crooner.” When she replies, she sends a quick text to Octavia.

CLARKE (9:02AM) – Will you pick up some pickles, please?  
OCTAVIA (9:02AM) – Sure thing.

“There’s a lot that you don’t know about me, Clarke Griffin.” Lexa winks, and while Clarke is texting her best friend, Lexa is doing the same.

LEXA (9:02AM) – Reyes, get a bag of pretzels while you’re out.  
RAVEN (9:02AM) – Yes, mother.

Lexa moves to lay her phone back down and turns back to Clarke to find that she’s already back on her side too, staring at the brunette. “First kiss?” Clarke asks.

“Sure thing.” Lexa says. “Let’s do it.” She starts to lean and Clarke smacks her in the forehead. They both fall into a fit of laughter. 

“I meant, how old were you?” Clarke gets out in between chuckles, and tries to ignore the heat taking over her face and other areas of her body.

“Oh. Hmm… I was seven.”

“Seven? Holy shit.”

“Yeah. His name was John Murphy.” Lexa replies. “We were in second grade and he laid one on me one day at recess. That’s the day that I knew I was into girls.” Clarke laughs at Lexa’s storytelling, remembering Lexa’s goofy stories that she tells Finn before bedtime. “What about you, Clarke Griffin?”

“I was thirteen. His name was Jasper and it was awful.” 

Lexa laughs out loud. “That bad, huh?”

“The worst.”

“Did you play any sports in school?” Lexa asks with a hint of a grin on her face.

“You know that I didn’t.” Clarke groans, sticking her tongue out at the brunette across from her.

“How would I know that? I’ve only known you for two weeks.”

“You’ve seen me throw a baseball.”

“Oh yeah.” Lexa hums. “You’re right. Damn it. I wasted my question.”

“Does it feel like two weeks to you?” Clarke asks, her tone more serious than it has been being. Lexa’s sharp, emerald eyes glisten in the light of the bedroom, and peer over at Clarke. “I mean, that you’ve only been here for two weeks. It seems like so much longer.”

Lexa hums again, turning back on her back and looking at the ceiling. “Is that a bad thing?”

“Not at all.” Clarke answers truthfully. “The opposite, I think.”

“Yeah?” Lexa asks, looking back to Clarke. “Why’s that?”

Clarke shrugs. “I just never, in a million years, expected to have any kind of relationship with you. I mean, two weeks ago, you broke into my house and held a hand over my mouth, telling me to stay quiet.” She sees Lexa scrunch her nose, remembering that night, vividly. “Now, here we are. Sharing a bed, and having girl talk, trying to learn a little bit more about each other.”

“And what kind of relationship do we have?” Lexa asks bluntly, taking Clarke off guard. 

“Oh, uhm.. – well, we – we’re friends.” Clarke stutters. “Aren’t we?”

Lexa nods. “Yes. Friends.”

‘But, God, do I want more.’ They both think.

 

//

 

Raven, Octavia, and Finn made their way into the grocery store in town. It wasn’t too busy, being as it was still fairly early in the day to be grocery shopping. The entire ride from Clarke’s house, into town, had been awkward to say the least, and it would have been silent, had it not been for Finn’s commentary on everything that they passed. It was clear that Octavia really didn’t want anything to do with Raven, seeing as she was associated closely with Lexa, but once they were walking through the grocery store together, Raven couldn’t keep silent anymore. She had to know what Clarke’s friend thought about the whole situation.

“So, I think that something is happening with our friends.” The taller woman says, not wanting to beat around the bush any. Octavia gives her a weird, side-eyed glance, and doesn’t say anything. “What?” Raven continues. “I can’t be the only one that sees it.”

Octavia lets out a very audible sigh. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“Bullshit.” Raven utters, not afraid of Finn hearing her, because he was further ahead of them, scanning over several boxes of cereal. “I’ve only known Clarke for like two weeks, but she’s seemed a lot more smiley over the past few days.”

“And what?” Octavia huffs. “You think that my best friend is just smitten with yours?” She asks sarcastically. “Who’s to say that Lexa isn’t into Clarke?”

“Hey.” Raven surrenders, holding both hands in the air. “You don’t have to tell me. I know, without a doubt, that Lexa is already in way too deep.” She chuckles to herself. “I’ve never seen her like this before. All happy and shit. I thought that after being incarcerated for so long, she’d be a completely different Lexa, in the worst way.” Raven shrugs, most just speaking her thoughts aloud. “But it’s actually quite the opposite.”

“And you’re okay with that?” Octavia argues, the distaste in her voice very evident to the other woman. “This is my best friend.” She says. “And it’s not just her that’s involved in this. It’s Finn too. Don’t think that I haven’t seen the way that he and Lexa act together. It’s crazy. He just met her, and what he knows about her is a lie.”

Raven stops automatically, jutting out a hand and catching Octavia by the wrist, making her stop, as well. “You don’t know her.” Raven fights. “Everything that he knows about her, the way that she acts around him… that’s all her. It’s not a lie. Just because he doesn’t know her backstory, doesn’t mean that she’s lying to him. I’ve never seen her like this with anyone. Finn and Clarke, both included. Yeah, at first, I was like you; hesitant and yielding to this idea. I know that it could end bad. Lexa could be going back to the pen, or she might have to run further away, but isn’t seeing our friends happy like this… worth it? What if it actually works out? Don’t you think that they both deserve a little happiness in their lives? Why should it matter how it came about?”

There’s a silence that settles over the both of them. Raven continues to walk closer to Finn, with Octavia on her heels. “Maybe Clarke is just being friendly to Lexa because she thinks that she treated her wrong to begin with.” The shorter woman says, as she approaches Raven from behind. “Clarke told me about all of the arguments and stuff at the beginning.”

“Oh.” Raven says, turning around in the aisle to face Octavia. “They still argue, from what I hear, but they’re pretty quick to work it out. Whatever it is.” Raven sees Octavia make a face, and decides to keep talking. “However, I do think that they are both extremely clueless. Seriously. They’re both idiots.” Raven chuckles, and is surprised to hear one come from Octavia as well.

“Yeah.” Octavia grins. “Clarke’s completely oblivious to her feelings. I mean, she’s admitted to me that she thinks that Lexa is attractive.”

“Duh.” Raven interrupts. “Have you seen her?”

“Anyway… but she refused to say that she was harboring any sort of feelings.”

Raven looks to Finn who is approaching the two of them, with a box of cereal in each hand. She smiles at him before looking back at Octavia. “I think that Clarke and Lexa could both use a little push in the right direction.” Raven smirks, and it earns her a muddled look from Octavia. “I say that they need a wingman.” They both look down to Finn with a smile, and he smiles back, not having a clue as to what they’re talking about.

 

//

 

On the ride home from town, Raven and Octavia are preparing their ‘talk’ with Finn. (Actually, it’s really only Raven preparing. Octavia still doesn’t want too much to do with the whole thing.) Raven didn’t think telling Finn in the middle of an aisle in the grocery store was the best place, so she opted to wait until they were on their way back. Octavia was driving, and Raven cleared her throat to turn around and look at Clarke’s son, who was buckled in the back seat.

“So, Finn…” Raven began, and Finn was quick to look up to her and see what it was that she wanted. “Does your mom ever date anyone?” She wasn’t quite sure how to go about the whole conversation, because she didn’t know if Clarke had ever talked to Finn about dating anyone. 

“Date?”

“Yeah.” Raven answers. “You know, like going out on dates and hanging out with someone. Someone that she might kiss or something like that.” She adds for good measure, and chuckles when she sees Finn scrunch up his nose. This earns a laugh from Octavia, too, who was clearly watching his face through the rearview mirror.

Finn shakes his head ‘no’, but then replies. “Not really. I think that she might have had a date with somebody she works with once.” He shrugs his tiny shoulders, and Raven’s eyes flick over to Octavia quickly to watch her reaction. She has none. “She got flowers from somebody a little while ago.”

“Was it a man or woman?” Raven urges, earning a punch in the arm from Octavia. Finn laughs. “What? I was just curious.” She whispers the next part to Octavia. “Like, Clarke is into both, right?” Raven was almost one-hundred percent sure that Clarke was into both men and women, judging by the way that she acted around Lexa, but she had to make sure. Octavia starts to answer Raven’s question, but it’s Finn who comes up with the answer.

“I think the flowers were from a girl.” He shrugs again. “I think her name was Niylah, or something like that.”

“Oh yeah.” Octavia chimes in. “That’s the nurse, at the clinic, who won’t leave Clarke alone.” She looks to Raven, who’s facing her now. “They went on one date, and apparently this Niylah chick can’t take ‘no’ for an answer.”

“I wish momma could find somebody.” Finn says from the back seat, causing Raven to turn back around to look at him with a grin. 

“Well, buddy… I think that I have a solution.” Raven smiles when she sees that Finn’s smile has widened. He looks excited. “You like Lexa, right?”

“Uh huh.” She nods his head with a smile, still not sure as to where this conversation is headed, but he’s listening intently.

“I think that she and your mom would make the cutest couple, don’t you?” Raven commented, followed by another chuckle from Octavia. At first, Finn looks a little confused and taken aback, but that look is quick to fall away. 

“Does Lexa want to kiss my momma?” He asks innocently, throwing both women into a fit of hysterics. 

Between breaths of laughter, Raven is finally able to answer the young boy’s question. “I’m sure that she would really like that.” 

“I think that momma wants to kiss Lexa.”

At this, Raven stops laughing all together and turns serious again. Her neck is beginning to hurt from being turned around in her seat the way that she is, but she doesn’t care. She has to get Finn on her side with this. If Lexa knew what she was doing, right now, she would kill her. “What makes you say that, bud?”

He shrugs again, and swings his feet a little. “I don’t know.” His fingers pick at the cloth of the backseat and he looks out the window as if he is thinking. “Momma is happy when she talks to Lexa. They both have a lot of fun together, and I have fun with them too.”

“So, you would like your mom and Lexa to go out on dates?” Raven asks, knowing that, at least for a while, Lexa would never be able to take Clarke out on a real date anywhere. Not with Lexa being on the FBI’s Most Wanted list. Not with every eye in the country out looking for her. It’s the principle, really. She feels so childish, talking like this with Finn, but she is trying to make sure that he is really on board with this plan. She doesn’t want to push something on him that he doesn’t really want.

“Yeah.” He grins. “That would be nice. Momma really likes flowers and movies. Maybe Lexa could take her to see a movie.”

“Maybe.” Raven smiles. “So, do you want to help get them together?”

“Uh huh.” He nods. “What do we do, though? How can I help?”

“Well, first off, you can’t let either of them know that we are trying to get them together.” Raven answers. “Don’t tell your mom or Lexa that we have had this conversation, okay?” Finn nods in agreement. “We just have to make sure that they’re together a lot and that they realize how much they like each other. You have to tell Lexa all of the great things about your mom, and you have to tell your mom all of the things that you like about Lexa. Can you do that?” He nods his head, again, vigorously. “Okay, so anytime that you need help with something, you come find me, okay?”

“Okay.”

 

//

 

Lexa had eventually gotten up, and made her way down to the basement, to look over some more files and video. She wanted to learn everything that she could about Carl Emerson, and his work for Nia. Her mind, though, was muddled with thoughts of her conversations with Clarke. Clarke was funny, and intelligent, and well-rounded. Lexa had, truly, never met anyone like the blonde before. Lexa didn’t think that she would ever be happy again. At least, not fully. She’s felt broken after all of these years, and she still does, but it’s nothing like it was. She’s happy here with Clarke and Finn. They’ve made her smile again. She can’t remember the last time that she’s smiled this much. Seriously. Her cheeks are starting to hurt just thinking about it.

Lexa’s life, right now, is a complete shit storm. It’s complete and utter chaos, actually, but in the middle of all of that chaos and insanity, there was Clarke. Her anchor. She’s weighed Lexa down, and held her steady. She’s sure that if it weren’t for Clarke, then she would be a total wreck right now. More than she still is.

She didn’t want to get involved in anything or with anyone, at least that’s not what she was thinking when she first left the prison. That was the furthest thing on her mind. She hasn’t imagined herself being with anyone in years. Lexa felt as if she would never have the time or energy for anyone anymore. Much less someone with a child. She didn’t think that she would ever be ready for that, but Clarke… Clarke is so good to her. Lexa has gotten swept up in Clarke’s virtuousness, and little by little, even though it’s terrifying as hell, she’s found herself falling for Clarke. She knows that it’s ridiculous. She knows that she’s probably alone in those feelings, but she can’t deny them. It’s only been a little over two weeks since the night that she broke into Clarke’s life, but she feels as if she’s known Clarke for a lifetime. If not more. It’s was definitely not love at first sight or anything like that… but it was a familiarity. An awareness. Something like ‘Oh. Hey. It’s you. It’s going to be you.’

Knocking Lexa out of her thoughts, Finn came running down the stairs with a huge, dopey smile on his face, and it only helped to melt the brunette’s heart even further. “Lexa!” He exclaims, jumping up and down like he had to pee or something. Lexa couldn’t keep herself from laughing.

“What’s up, buddy?” She grins. “Did you have fun with Raven and your Aunt Octavia?”

“Uh huh.” He nods assuredly. “Guess what!”

“What?” She tried to act just as excited, because he was so into whatever it was, she didn’t want to let him and his excitement down.

“I got stuff to make my mom’s famous Christmas sugar cookies! We make them every year together.” He smiles again. “Want to help us make them?”

Lexa’s sure that if Raven were down here, in the basement, right now, she would be making fun of the way that Lexa looks. Making fun of how much she smiles when she’s around this kid and his mom, but she, honestly, couldn’t care less about her best friend’s teasing right now. “Are you sure you want me to?” She asks, not wanting to butt into his time with his mother. She feels like she might have taken some of that away when she came barging into their life. “I mean, if you and your mom always do it together, she may prefer if the two of you make the cookies together.”

“She wants you to!” Finn practically yells in excitement, earning a weird look from Lexa. Finn knew that that was only a little white lie. His mother hadn’t told him that she wanted Lexa to help, but he knew that she wouldn’t mind the brunette being there anyway. This was his and Raven’s first plan, getting Lexa to spend more alone time with him and Clarke. Raven had assured Finn that she and Octavia would stay out of their way. 

“Okay.” Lexa chuckles, and quickly shuts down the computers before the small boy could see anything incriminating towards her. She wasn’t sure what she would do if Finn found out about her. It would break her heart if he lost faith and trust in her. “Let’s go make some cookies.”

 

//

 

“Finn!” Clarke laughs out loud as her son breaks another egg in the bowl by accident. This was like the fourth one, and Clarke and Lexa were both having giggle fits now. As was Finn. 

“I don’t think that egg-breaking is your forte.” Lexa says between chuckles, leaning over the bowl and picking out all of the eggshells lying in their batter. 

“I’m five!” He shouts. “What do you expect? I’m not Bobby Flay!” This causes the two women to laugh even harder and Finn grabs a hand full of flour, just like Raven had told him to, and he tosses it towards Lexa.   
Luckily, for the brunette, she saw it coming and moved out of the way. Unluckily, for Clarke, she was standing right behind Lexa. The flour dusted over her face, creating a puff of dust to fly out across the kitchen. “Uh oh.” He utters, under his breath, quickly taking a glance at Lexa, who was trying to stave off her laughter.

“Finn Jacob Griffin!” Clarke yells, and she’s not doing the best job of holding back her own amusement either. She just so happens to look over at Lexa, and that’s when the brunette loses it. Lexa is practically bent over, holding her knees and laughing. Finn joins in only moments later, and Clarke is quick to grab a handful of flour herself. “Oh,” Clarke mutters, walking a step closer to Lexa. “You think this is funny?”

Lexa nods in her delight. “It’s pretty funny, Cla – “ She doesn’t get to finish before she gets her own face full of the white, dusty ingredient. “Oh my G – God.” Lexa stutters out, spitting small amounts of flour out of her mouth in the process. Her long, brown hair is down and filled with flour. Clarke’s just so happened to be up in a messy bun, so it didn’t cover her as badly. Even though Lexa really, really wants to get the blonde woman back, she notices that the kid that started it all, somehow managed to get out unscathed. She takes two handfuls, and is quick to drop them on top of the boy’s head, earning a gasp from Finn. He growls playfully and starts shaking his hair, like a dog, attempting to get the flour out.

“Mom!” Finn exclaims, with faux anger laced in his voice. “Are you just going to let her do that to me?” Step 3 in Finn and Raven’s plan was to, then, get Lexa and Clarke alone. Finn just has to find his out now.

“Sorry, Woods.” Clarke shrugs in the direction of the taller woman. “He’s right. I can’t let you get away with that.”

“What? He started it!” Lexa replies, and neither of them notice that Finn, slowly, starts slipping away and down the hallway. “Clarke…” Lexa warns and backs up against the counter when she sees the blonde grabs an egg from the carton. “You really, really don’t want to do this.” Lexa utters with her hands in the air as if she were surrendering.

Clarke hums, as she slowly walks closer, her mischievous smirk coming into play. “Is that a threat?”

Lexa shakes her head haphazardly, and then replies with a devilish grin of her own. “It’s a promise.” And just like that, Clarke holds the egg over the brunette’s head and smashes it into curly, brown locks. Lexa nods, her eyes closed and her smirk gone. She reaches blindly for her own egg and Clarke starts to run around the counter away from her. Lexa groans when she wipes the egg from where it has fallen into her face, and takes off after Clarke. Clarke’s laughter fills the room and Lexa’s heart, as she makes circles around the counter from Lexa. She can’t help but laugh at Lexa, with her face and hair covered in egg and flour. She feels like a kid, and she doesn’t even care. “You might as well stop running, Clarke.” Lexa growls, and Clarke would be lying if she said that the way that Lexa said her name, just then, didn’t affect her in some sort of way.

“Never.” Clarke replies, and just like that, Lexa fakes like she is about to run left, but then she quickly changes to go right, and runs smack into the blonde’s arms. Clarke struggles in Lexa’s grip, but Lexa is too strong. Clarke laughs and laughs along with Lexa, until their sides hurt.

“Your son is a terrible influence.” Lexa says, as one of her arms, inattentively, wraps tighter around Clarke’s midsection. If Clarke notices the way that Lexa’s heart is beating out of her chest, she doesn’t say anything.

“He didn’t get it from me.” Clarke shrugs with a small smile. “He’s been hanging around you too much.” Lexa hums and nods her head, looking down at blue eyes. Clarke moves an arm out of Lexa’s hold and reaches up to brush a strand of egg-covered hair out of the brunette’s face, the tip of her fingers just barely grazing over Lexa’s temple.

“Clarke…” Lexa whispers, and all that she can think about is leaning in just a few more inches and taking Clarke’s lips with her own. Lexa’s hand rubs slow, tentative circles into Clarke’s back, and all of a sudden she realizes how intimate this situation is, and as bad as she wants Clarke… she can’t have her. She can’t do this, so she backs up a bit and cracks the, forgotten, egg on top of the blonde’s head.

Blue eyes go wide, and her mouth goes slack. “I can’t believe you did that.” 

“You did it to me.” Lexa shrugs. “It’s only fair, Clarke Griffin.”

“Well, you –“

“What the hell kind of weird porno are you two making in here?” Raven’s voice sounds from the hallway, urging Clarke and Lexa to jump apart as if they’d been caught doing something that they were supposed to. Raven sees that her and Finn’s plan is working marvelously. She notices all of the flour thrown across the kitchen and all over the two women’s bodies. Finn was a damn good wingman.

“What’s a porno?” Finn asks, sticking his head out from behind Raven in the hallway.

“Nothing!” Lexa and Clarke both yell in unison. “It’s a swear word.” Lexa adds, throwing a death glare towards her best friend. “You and Raven both owe the swear jar.”

“What?” Finn gasps. “I didn’t even know it was a swear word! That’s not fair.” Clarke chuckles and smacks Lexa’s arm. “It’s okay, Finn. Only Raven owes the jar, but just don’t say it again.”

Raven rolls her eyes when Finn looks up at her to stick his tongue out. “Come on, kid. You need a shower.” She says, throwing her arm across his shoulder and pulling him back down the hallway. “The two big kids can stay behind and clean up the mess that they made.”

Lexa turns to Clarke, who is smiling widely and shaking her head. “Raven is the bad influence.” Clarke chuckles.

“You’re not wrong about that.” Lexa smirks, and almost flinches backwards when Clarke reaches up again and uses her thumb to brush flour from the corner of Lexa’s mouth. She’s sure that the blonde notices how her breath hitches, but her mind is to cloudy to care. “If you’ll finish the cookies,” Lexa says, trying to take her mind off of what she wants to do to Clarke. “I’ll start cleaning up the mess we made.”

Clarke retracts her hand slowly and nods. “Okay.” She smiles a small smile, warming Lexa’s heart all over again. “I can do that.” Clarke makes her way back over to the counter, reluctant to pull herself out of Lexa’s orbit. Her mind is whirring and her heart is pounding. She’s never felt this pull. Not to anyone. Not even to big Finn. She hopes that Lexa can’t see her hands shaking as she goes to break the rest of the eggs into the mixing bowl. Clarke’s feelings have snuck up on her and she’s terrified. She’s slowly falling for this woman, and it’s all under the most unusual circumstances and terms. Actually, who is she kidding, there’s nothing slow about it. She falling quickly. Too quickly. 

She remembers what her father told her once, when she thought that she was falling in love for the first time, in high school. He told her that sometimes you fall in love with the most unexpected person at the most unexpected time, and boy… was he right.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> What did you think? Let me know in the comments below and feel free to leave kudos and tell your friends. ;) Love you all!
> 
> Follow me on Twitter @asuzh90


	10. I Don't Want to Forget

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi, guys! I hope that you all had a great New Years! I wish all of you joy and happiness for 2017. (And yes... I did just quote Whitney Houston)
> 
> I hope you enjoy the update! I'm sorry that it took a little longer, but it is about 4k words more than usual. 
> 
> Love you guys!

Before Finn could get cleaned up, Clarke called him back into the kitchen to take a picture with she and Lexa. Raven took the picture herself, and she really wanted to make it known that it was their first family picture together, but she held her tongue. Lexa and Clarke stood on either side of the kid and crosses their arms over their chests and pouted. Grinning from ear to ear, Finn stood between them, and after the photo op, he made his way back to the bathroom to take a bath.

“Don’t post that on anything.” Raven says to Clarke, as she hands her her cell phone back. “Can’t have my girl’s face popping up on any social media sites, got it?”

“I’m not an idiot, Raven.” Clarke argues, rolling her eyes and pocketing her cell phone. She ignores Raven and walks back towards the bowl to finish mixing the last of the cookie dough. Raven sits down at the counter, her eyes raking over the other two women. She wanted to burst out into laughter at the way the two looked, covered head to toe in flour and egg. However, she kept quiet and watched them as they worked. Clarke mixing dough, and Lexa sweeping up the mess that they had made.

“I would expect this from Finn, but you two…” Raven clicks her tongue, feigning disapproval. 

“Shut it, Reyes.” Lexa says, leaning down to sweep the mess into a dust pan. “We were just having a bit of fun.”

“I know.” Raven chuckles. “Chill the fuck out, Woods. You two are adorable.” Lexa’s face immediately goes red, and Clarke looks up to Raven with an odd look plastered on her face. 

“We can’t help it.” Clarke says, beating Raven at her own game and pretending that she’s not affected by the woman’s teasing. “Some of us are just born this way.” The blonde shrugs, and glances over her shoulder at Lexa who grins at her before emptying the dustpan into the trashcan. 

“Whatever.” Raven utters. “So,” She breathes after a couple of minutes of silence and awkward looks between herself and Clarke. The blonde seemed like she knew that Raven was up to something, but couldn’t quite put her finger on it. “Octavia told me that we were having a, and I quote, ‘girl’s night’ tomorrow night.”

Clarke nods in her answer, she just hasn’t gotten around to telling Lexa about it. Finn is already set up to go stay the entire night with Mrs. Caldwell and her granddaughter so that the four women could let loose for a little while. “I thought that it might be fun. I know that Lexa can’t go out anywhere, and she needs to have a little fun every now and again.” Clarke grins over her shoulder at the taller woman, who walks up behind her. Lexa sticks her finger in the, now empty, bowl of dough, scraping the sides and tasting the raw food. Clarke crinkles her nose, and finishes her statement. “We all do.”

“Well,” Raven begins, completely ignoring all of the fucking heart-eyes that are being thrown around the kitchen. Seriously… these two are so oblivious. It’s unreal. “It looks like the two of you have started on the fun without us.” The Latina woman mutters, pointing her finger around at the still lingering mess around the kitchen. Raven gets up from her stool and rolls her eyes at the pair before her. “You should really get this cleaned up, Lex.” Her best friend teases before sending her a wink and walking back down the hallway to the stairs of the basement.

“Lex?” Clarke teases, looking up to the woman standing beside her.

“Shut up.” Lexa groans while simultaneously rolling her eyes. 

“What?” Clarke chuckles and turns to toss all of the dirty utensils into the sink. She then spins to place the cookie sheet of dough balls into the oven. “I think it’s cute.” The blonde grins, and playfully lifts herself up to sit on the counter in the kitchen, dangling her legs in front of the cabinets.

“It’s not cute.” Lexa says, trying to pretend like she is tough and anything but cute. “It’s annoying when Raven calls me that.”

“Oh.” Clarke grins, and lifts her hands to tug Lexa over to her, until the brunette is almost standing between Clarke’s, legs that are still swinging from the countertop. “What about when I call you that, Lex?” 

Okay… Lexa, up to this point hasn’t really known if Clarke was just really nice and fun to be around, or if she was flirting with Lexa, because honestly… Lexa still doesn’t know if Clarke is even into women, but THAT. That was definitely flirting. The way that Clarke’s low, raspy voice came across more sultry than anything, and the way that the blonde pulls her by the hem of her shirt until she’s standing between Clarke’s legs. Lexa, at this point, doesn’t know what to do with her hands. She’s standing there, arms dangling by her sides, and attempting to look anywhere but Clarke’s eyes.

Lexa really, really wanted to tell Clarke that when she says ‘Lex’, it’s so much fucking better than when Raven says it. She wants nothing more than to lean forward and finally do what she’s been wanting to do since the moment she met this blonde in front of her.

“You okay?” Clarke’s voice seems to break Lexa out of her thoughts, and it’s probably a good thing, because her thoughts were starting to tell her all sorts of things. Lexa could tell that Clarke seemed worried about something all of a sudden, and she was right. Clarke was worried that she might have been a little too obvious and crossed a line, just then, with Lexa.

“I’m fine.” Lexa finally answers after finding her voice, and her eyes meet Clarke’s. Lexa really hoped that Clarke could not feel or hear her heart beating frantically in her chest. She felt as if her whole body was shaking from the experience, and she really hoped that it didn’t look that obvious. Lexa finally brings herself to shrug, pretending as if she couldn’t care less, one way or another. “I guess it’s a little bit better when you say it. Raven’s just annoying.”

Clarke raises a brow in amusement and a small smirk forms on her face. “So, it’s just a little bit better?” The blonde continues to tease her friend, loving the way that Lexa keeps rolling her eyes towards her. 

Lexa shakes her head at Clarke’s ridiculousness, but she can’t hide her smile. The brunette holds up one hand, gesturing with her thumb and index finger, showing the sign for ‘little’ and squinting her eyes a bit. “Just a little.” She repeats, and then brings her hands down to rest on Clarke’s thighs. She didn’t mean to. She didn’t even think about it, really, but she doesn’t really want to retract them, and the way that 

Clarke is smiling, it doesn’t seem that she wants Lexa to remove them either.

They continue to stare at each other awkwardly. Well, not awkward to them, but to others who might walk in on them. Others like Raven, who just so happened to be walking back into the kitchen, because she had left her phone on the counter. “You two are seriously gross.” Raven teases, but Clarke and Lexa, both, snap their eyes up and catch the smile on her face. Lexa’s hands immediately retract, and she misses the pout on the blonde’s face, but then she’s jumping down off of her seat on the counter and Lexa steadies her when she lands.

Neither, Clarke nor Lexa, says anything back to Raven. Both of their faces are flustered and red, and what is there really to say? They probably did look silly standing there in that way, with Lexa’s hands on Clarke’s thighs, her thumbs rubbing small circles into the blonde’s jeans, and their eyes attached to each other, almost permanently.

Luckily, for them, Raven doesn’t linger. She grabs her phone and heads back downstairs. Finn comes in only a moment later to tell his mother that he finished his bath. “You can go now.” Clarke mutters, looking at   
Lexa. “Take your shower. I’ll finish cleaning up.”

“No.” Lexa replies with a small shake of her head. “Go ahead and go. I’ll finish up here, and you can tell Finn his bedtime story while I shower.” The brunette grins, and Clarke can’t help but mirror the smile. Their lives had become so intertwined, and it was almost too domestic. For Lexa anyway. She hadn’t had something like this in a long time.

“Okay.” Clarke says shyly, before standing on her tip toes, which was unnecessary because there wasn’t that much height difference between them, and placing a soft kiss to the other woman’s cheek. “Thank you.”   
Clarke smiles before turning and heading towards the hallway to take a shower. As soon as she’s in her bedroom, Finn turns to Lexa with a huge smile on his face. He lifts both hands into a ‘thumbs up’ and Lexa gives him a quizzical look.

“What’s that for, kid?”

“My mom kissed you.”

“So?” Lexa replies with a more dumbfounded look this time. She really didn’t know what Finn was getting around to. “She kisses you all of the time.”

“I’m her kid.” He shrugs before jumping up into his favorite bar stool at the kitchen counter, while Lexa washes the countertops. “She’s supposed to. You, on the other hand, are definitely not her kid.”

Lexa, sometimes, forgets how young Finn is. His so much more mature and the way he speaks is way past any other five-year-old that she’s ever encountered. “I – I’m her friend. Sometimes friends – friends kiss each other’s cheeks.” And she hopes that Finn is smart enough to pick up on the fact that she’s blushing and why.

“Whatever.” He grins. “Do you like my mom?”

“Finn.” Lexa says with a sigh and chuckle. “Where is this going? Where’s this coming from?”

“I don’t know.” He answers, moving his elbows to the counter top and placing his chin in the palm of his awaiting hands. “I think that she really likes you.” Lexa doesn’t say anything, she only continues to look at him like a deer caught in headlights. “Like… likes you, likes you.” He grins.

Lexa is sure that if she would have been drinking something or eating something then, she would have choked. “I don’t think so, buddy.” I wish that that were true, she thinks.

“Do you not like her like that?” He asks, and Lexa doesn’t miss the let-down look that he sports. “Because I think that you two should go on a date.”

“Is this a joke?” She says, with eyes still wide. “Am I on Punk’d? Where’s Ashton?”

“Who’s Ashton?” Finn asks, but then quickly forgets, or just doesn’t care. Either way, her moves on with the conversation. “Do you like her or not?”

“Geez, kid.” She sighs, as she washes the final dish rag out at the sink. Finally finished cleaning up the mess that the three of them had made earlier. “I do like your mom. She’s great. Anyone would be lucky to date your mom.” Lexa decided to be honest with him, because she knew how smart he was, and she didn’t want to lie to the little guy.

“So you date her!” He practically yells, and Lexa is quick to shush him.

“Whoa, Finn.” She chuckles awkwardly, because this whole situation was just… out there. “There’s a lot more to it than just dating someone.” His smile falls, she doesn’t miss that, so she decides to just be a little blunt with the kid. She’s sure that he has heard things like this before, whether his mother is into women or not. “I date girls.” She starts. “I think that your mom might only be interested in dating guys, so that would be a major problem.” She laughs lightly, hoping to bring a smile back to the adorable boy’s face.

Finn’s nose scrunches up as he thinks about Lexa’s words. “No.” He says firmly. “She likes girls too. She used to go on dates with a nurse that works with her. Miss Niylah.”

Lexa is sure that she looks like a total fucking idiot right about now. Her eyes shot open, and her mouth dropped as well. This is a five-year-old, so she really, really did not want to get her hopes up, because it may or may not be true. Her heart is beating erratically and she’s glad that Finn doesn’t seem to notice. “Are you sure?” She felt like a moron having this conversation with a kid, but she was curious, and that was putting it mildly.

“Uh huh.” He replies. “Niylah used to send momma flowers and everything.” Finn stops for a while, and realizes that Lexa is sort of just lost in her own world of thoughts. He watches the woman’s face, as she subconsciously scrunches her nose and furrows her eyebrows. “Just send mom flowers.” He continues, wondering if Lexa is trying to think of ways to make his mother happy. “She really likes daisies.”

Once Lexa is drug out of her own thoughts, and she closes her mouth, that was still hanging agape, she speaks. “I, uh – maybe I can send some flowers.” She shrugs, trying to make this out like it’s not that big of a deal to her at all. “Just to thank her for letting me stay here.” She adds, because as much as she would like to date Clarke, she can’t. She can’t start anything with the blonde, knowing that she won’t be able to stay.   
Lexa won’t be the one to hurt Clarke and Finn. She refuses it.

After a few more minutes of rambling, on Finn’s part, Clarke comes back into the kitchen. Her hair is damp and she’s sporting a pair of flannel pajama pants and a t-shirt, and Lexa knows that she’s never seen anything as beautiful as Clarke Griffin. She’s perfect. “Hey, buddy.” Clarke says to Finn, coming up behind him and placing a hand on his tiny shoulder. “Ready for bed?”

“Yes ma’am.” He grins, jumping off the stool and sending a subtle wink towards Lexa, who can only roll her eyes at this five-year-old’s antics. “Night, Lex.” He says, before running down the hallway to his room, not allowing Lexa to reply.

“Shower’s ready for you.” Clarke smiles, looking at Lexa. Clarke can’t hold back a chuckle at all of the flour and egg still clumped up in Lexa’s long, brown hair. “I laid a towel out for you on the counter.”

“Thank you.” Lexa grins, making her way to Clarke’s bedroom to jump into the shower. She knows that she desperately needs one, but she can’t help but think of what taking a shower with Clarke would feel like.   
Running her long, slender fingers through blonde locks, and over pale, smooth skin. Lexa shivers just thinking about it. She wishes that her body wouldn’t betray her like this. Perhaps, it would be easier to forget about how strong her feelings for Clarke are. 

As she washes her brown hair under the showerhead, her mind floats back to the night that she broke into the Griffin household. The darkness was overwhelming, but her eyes quickly adjusted. She had come through the kitchen door that was connected to the backyard, and she had immediately seen a blonde woman sitting on the couch; the light of the TV screen was the only thing lighting up the place. Lexa remembers how her heart was pounding, and how she halfway expected the noise to give her away, but nothing compared to the pounding of her heart when she was met with blue eyes only moments later. The blue eyes that have absolutely changed her life and her outlook on life, period.

Lexa has just been going over the motions, as if she were in auto-pilot mode, over the last few minutes. She’s already out of the shower, and dressed into her pajamas. She makes her way out of the ensuite bathroom, and into Clarke’s bedroom. Clarke still isn’t in the bed, which Lexa is thankful for, because she doesn’t know if she’d be able to refuse jumping into bed with the blonde if she saw her there. Lexa tosses her used towel into the hamper in the corner of the room, reminding her that she should start a load of laundry for Clarke in the morning. She plops down onto her makeshift bed on the floor, not worrying with turning the lights of the bedroom off, since Clarke wasn’t in yet. She knew it would only be a few more minutes. 

Her back is to the door, and she’s about to drift away to sleep, when she hears the door, behind her, open. There’s a bit of silence, before she hears a content sigh leave Clarke’s mouth, and then the lights are being flicked off, casting them into almost darkness, just like the night that they had first ‘met’.

Lexa doesn’t turn over or say anything. She only waits to hear the dip of Clarke’s bed as she settles into it, but that sound doesn’t come, and the next thing she knows, she feels the blankets beside her being ruffled and shifted. Lexa opens her eyes, and realizes that Clarke is lying down on the floor with her, the blonde’s blue eyes searching over Lexa’s face with a small smile. “What are you doing down here?” Lexa asks, with amusement in her voice, and she thanks whatever God there is that Clarke can’t hear how her heart is thumping inside her chest, as if it were aching to get out and join the person that is slowly beginning to steal it from her.

A sleepy smile washes over Clarke’s features and her eyes flutter closed, but only for just a moment before they’re opened again. Lexa sees Clarke shrug as best she can in her lying position. “I’m not really sure.”   
Clarke answers after a moment. “I just didn’t want to get into the bed.” Not without you, she thinks to herself, but is too damn scared to admit it.

“Is everything okay?” The brunette manages, in her dizzy state. The dizziness has come from the warm breath that meets her face when Clarke speaks. It smells of cinnamon from the blonde’s toothpaste, and she can’t help but wonder what it would taste like. She quickly shakes her head, scolding herself for her thoughts.

Clarke let’s out a breath of air, once again, the smell meeting Lexa’s face within a millisecond. “Everything’s fine.” She replies, and thinks of how much better and happier she’s felt since Lexa came into her life.   
Even if they were only ever friends, Clarke is beyond happy to have known her. Lexa’s smiles, her personality, her eyes, her heart, her humor… everything about her is absolutely perfect. In Clarke’s eyes, anyway. “Just wanted to tell you that you are – I am very glad that I met you, Alexandria Woods.” She changes her mind, last minute, not sure of what was about to spill out of her mouth.

Lexa grins, but rolls her eyes, as well, because Clarke knows how much she hates her full name. “You’re glad that some escaped inmate broke into your house and held a hand to your mouth and told you not to scream?” Lexa asks sarcastically.

Clarke chuckles, and inches closer to Lexa to share a pillow with her, seeing as the blonde didn’t have a pillow under her head. Luckily, for Lexa, Clarke misses the brunette’s intake of breath at the sudden closeness. “It was the most terrifying experience, I believe, that I’ve ever had.” Clarke answers truthfully, and even in the dark, she can see Lexa’s face fall. “And I wouldn’t change it for a thing.” Clarke smiles when she sees Lexa’s face lift back up into a smile of her own.

“Well,” Lexa starts, moving her way a little bit closer. “It seems that I ran up on the right house.” Lexa grins, and then she’s pretty sure that she just saw Clarke’s sapphire eyes glance down to her lips for a split second, but then they were looking back at Lexa’s own eyes. “Want to hear something weird?”

“Please.” Clarke smiles, hoping that Lexa’s ‘something weird’ will relieve some of the tension settling between them right now. Not that it’s bad tension, Clarke’s just afraid of what she might do, being in this close proximity to the brunette beside her.

“Even though I got shot, and I’m now on the FBI’s Most Wanted List,” Lexa says, her face going into her serious mode. That’s what Clarke likes to call it, anyway. “I’m so happy that I decided to turn my life around and break out of prison.” She says, and Clarke looks at her with a little bit of confusion written over her features. “Because I got to meet you and Finn, and you just – you guys are something. Something special, and I know that it’s weird, but I can’t imagine, now, not ever knowing the two of you.” Lexa can’t believe that she just admitted that. It’s like her mouth had a mind of its own, and it was refusing to listen to Lexa’s head, and instead, listen to her heart. She can’t take it back now, and she knows that her statement could be taken a number of different ways, but in the back of her mind, she really, really hopes that Clarke can read between the lines.

They lie there, in silence, for what feels like an eternity, until Lexa feels Clarke shift again. At first, she thinks that the blonde is finally getting up, and making her way back to her bed, but that’s not what happens. She only shifted closer, if that was even possible. Lexa is almost going cross-eyed, looking into Clarke’s gorgeous blue eyes at this distance, or lack thereof. One of the blonde’s hands moves from under the covers and comes to rest on Lexa’s cheek, pushing a strand of brown hair back, in the process. Lexa closes her eyes at the touch, and tries to focus on her breathing. She knows that Clarke can feel her heartbeat now. It’s pounding throughout her entire body, and she thinks that she may actually die of a heart attack, right here and now.

“Clarke…” Lexa breathes out. She meant for it to be a warning of some sort, but it came out sounding more like a plea. Lexa’s eyes are still shut tight, when she feels Clarke’s forehead press to her own, and she thinks that she feels the brush of the tip of Clarke’s nose on her own, and Lexa can’t bring herself to pull away. This is a bad idea. A very bad idea, and neither of them can bring themselves to back up and put some distance between them. Neither of them has felt this way, this closeness, in a very long time. This need to be next to someone. Someone that cares about them in a deeper way than friendship. They both draw each other in, like magnets, every time that they’re together, like they’ll always find each other and feel the pull. This is ridiculous. It’s been less than three weeks, and Clarke can’t imagine being without Lexa now. Her thumb moves, on its own accord, over Lexa’s sculpted cheekbones and down to the side of her jaw. “Clarke…” Lexa whispers again, her eyes finally opening and meeting blue ones, that are way too close to her, yet, still so far away. “What are we doing?” 

“I don’t – “ Clarke starts, her voice being just barely over a whisper. “I don’t know. I just – I just need to be close to someone.” The blonde admits, but then changes it up a small bit, because that wasn’t completely true. She didn’t need to be close to just anyone. “I feel like I need to be close to you.”

This time, Clarke hears the intake of breath that Lexa seems to gulp down. She feels when Lexa moves one of her hands to Clarke’s waist, under the covers. She sees when Lexa’s eyes start to glisten in the light of the moon, that seems to find its way in through the window above them. “We can’t.” Lexa utters, even though her body is, once again, betraying her when her hand tightens around the blonde’s waist and pulls her body against her own. “I – I can’t.” And it seems likes she’s trying to convince herself more than anyone else.

“Why?” Clarke asks softly, her blue eyes searching Lexa’s, and her hand moves from Lexa’s jaw down behind her neck, nudging the forehead even closer, if possible. This need is crazy. It’s scary, but Clarke can’t help herself. She wants to be close to Lexa, in every way, shape, and form. She feels incomplete without her body touching every inch of the brunette’s in front of her.

Lexa’s bottom lip shutters, and she has to hold back a whimper at the feeling of Clarke’s hand playing with the baby hairs at the back of her neck, under her hairline. “I don’t want to hurt you.” Lexa finally manages, and that’s one-hundred-percent the truth. “I don’t want to hurt Finn.” She sighs sadly. “I won’t be here. I will have to leave at some point.”

Lexa feels Clarke’s hand loosen up on her neck, and the blonde pulls back a little. Clarke knows what Lexa is talking about. She knows that, more than likely, Lexa will have to leave, either to go back to prison, or to fight against her aunt, but she wants Lexa. “If it’s what you want,” Clarke says gently, closing her eyes, because the words are painful for her to say, which is silly, because they’ve only just met. “Then we can just be like we’ve been, Lexa. We can just exist with each other. I can be your friend, if that’s all that you want. I will help you get through all of this shit with Nia. I’ll do whatever you want me to.” 

“Can we –“ Lexa begins, hesitantly. She really, really doesn’t want to say these words, but she has no choice. She isn’t the only one involved in this, and she can’t ruin the Griffin’s lives too. “Can we just be friends?   
Can it just be like it’s been?”

There’s a moment where the air is hot and awkward, and Clarke tries to pull on her best smile, but it comes off as sad and disappointed. “Of course we can, Lex. Whatever you want.” Clarke answers, before leaning in and placing a soft, lingering kiss to Lexa’s forehead. “Whatever you need.” Clarke says, pulling further away. “I’m here.” And just like that, she’s up and out of the makeshift floor bed, and Lexa hears the dip of the blonde’s bed above her.

Lexa lies there, in the darkness, and in the silence, thinking about what just happened. She has her answer. The answer that she’s been searching for for two weeks. Clarke reciprocates her feelings, but Lexa can’t bring herself to act on them. She knows that it may seem selfish, but she’s doing it for Clarke. She’s doing it for Finn. She can’t bring them into her life, when her life is nothing but trouble and a huge mess. She moves her hand up, to wipe away a single tear that seems to fall and roll down her cheek, and up above her, Clarke is doing the same thing.

 

//

 

The next morning, when Lexa wakes and stands up from her bed on the floor to stretch, the first thing that she notices is that Clarke isn’t in bed. She thinks back to the morning before, when she and Clarke spent half of the day lying in the blonde’s bed and just talking and getting to know each other. She remembers the fun that she, Clarke, and Finn had had the night before, baking cookies and getting into the flour fight. 

Lexa smiles at the memory. Hanging out with Finn and with Clarke, is what makes her happy. The giggles that Finn lets out whenever Lexa tickles him, or the proud smile when he throws the perfect pitch while they’re playing baseball, are just two of the little things that she loves about the little guy. The soft smile that Clarke gets sometimes when she’s being shy or embarrassed by something, is something that Lexa could easily see herself falling in love with. Her heart stutters, in her chest, at the thought. 

She’s brought out of her thoughts when the last person that she wants to see, right now, barges through the door. Lexa’s thankful that she had on pajamas. “What did you do?” Octavia growls, as she runs up to   
Lexa and pushes her on the shoulders, knocking her back a bit. “Huh?” The shorter, feisty woman starts in again. “What the fuck did you do?”

“Wh – what are you talking about? Lexa stutters out. She’s never been one for any sort of confrontation, but she seems to keep finding herself in these situations with this woman.

“Don’t play ignorant, Woods.” She spits. “What did you do to Clarke?”

Lexa backs away from the crazy, short woman and looks at her like she’s trying to figure out a physics problem. Octavia is fuming, and Lexa has no clue why. Was something wrong with Clarke? What was this woman talking about? “I’m not sure that I know what you’re talking about, Octavia. If you could just tell me – “

“It had to have been you that did something. You’re the only person that was with her last night. Sharing this damn bedroom with her. Squeezing your way into all of the crevasses in her life. I mean, “ Octavia is winded but she doesn’t let up, and Lexa is tempted to slap her in the face, but that’s not the kind of person she is. Octavia, however, is a ball of fire and fury. “Really, why are you here? What are you trying to do here?”

“Okay.” Lexa utters under her breath, using her hands to gesture for Octavia to calm down. “We’ve had this conversation before, and I’m sure that you and Clarke have had it as well. I’m here because Clarke wanted me to stay. She’s helping Raven and I figure all of this out.” Again with the wild hand gesturing. “Tell me what’s wrong with Clarke.” Lexa tries changing the subject, because she really is worried, now, about the blonde. “Is she okay? Where is she?”

“She’s left.” Octavia hissed. “Said she was going for a run.”

Lexa lets out a sigh of relief at Octavia’s answer. “Jesus. I thought that something was wrong with her.”

“There is. Clarke never goes running. She hates it.” Octavia says. “She barely said a word to me before she left. So, again, I repeat, what did you do to my best friend?”

“You know what?” Lexa stars back in, furiously. “Can you stop hounding me for like five fucking seconds? Somet – something happened last night.” Lexa really can’t believe that she’s about to actually have this conversation with Octavia. As of right now, Lexa can barely stand to be around the other woman.

Octavia looks at Lexa sternly, trying to read between the lines of Lexa’s words. “What do you mean, ‘something happened last night’?”

“We – I don’t know. She laid down on the floor with me, and we kept drifting closer together.” Lexa’s heart thumps harder with only the memory of what had happened last night. Or what didn’t happen. “I asked her if something was wrong and she said that everything was fine, and that she, uh – “ 

“She what, Woods? Spit it out.”

Lexa blushes and she’s pretty sure that she sees a small smirk form on the black-headed girl’s face. “She told me that she just wanted to be close to me. That she needed to be close to me.”

Octavia looks a little taken aback, but not completely surprised, and Lexa furrows her eyebrows at the shorter woman. Octavia lets out a sarcastic chuckle and looks to the floor, shaking her head. “And what did you say?”

“I, uh – I just – I told her that we couldn’t.” Lexa answers shyly. “I told her that I couldn’t. I don’t want to hurt her or Finn. I can’t start something with her, to turn around and leave in a few weeks or something.   
That wouldn’t be fair to them.” Lexa finds herself telling Clarke’s friend all of the information that she’s kept locked up inside, well, at least until she had told Clarke all of this last night.

“What do you mean, ‘start something with her’?” Octavia prods, knowing full well what the taller woman means, but she just wants Lexa to put it into her own words. She told Clarke that she would try and get to know Lexa a little better. At least, try to figure her out.

Lexa lets out a very audible sigh, and looks down at her bare feet. “I can’t be anything other than a friend for Clarke.” She says. “Not now. Not the way that my life is in a mess right now.”

Octavia searches Lexa’s face, and finds nothing but genuine honesty. Octavia knows that her best friend has feelings for Lexa, but could it be possible that Lexa has them for Clarke too. Real, unaffected feelings. Octavia thinks that she does. “You have feelings for her.” She says, and Lexa realizes that it’s not a question. It’s Octavia’s observation of her, and it happens to be spot on.

Lexa’s eyes widen and she gulps at the dry lump in her throat. She knows, in the back of her mind, that she has feelings for Clarke, but this is the first time that it’s been spoken out loud by anyone. “I do have feelings for Clarke.” Lexa replies, honestly. “I just – this can’t be anything.”

“Why not?” Octavia asks, and Lexa is thrown off course by the question. It almost sounded as if Octavia wanted them to be something. 

“Bec – because, I don’t know.” Lexa grunts, plopping down on the bed and putting her face in her hands. She doesn’t care, in this moment, that she is showing this woman, that she barely knows, her weakness. “Haven’t we already discussed this?”

“You said that you would have to leave.” Octavia nods after speaking, because she gets where Lexa is coming from. “But, why wouldn’t you be able to come back?” She asks simply, and Lexa removes her hands to look up at the shorter woman. Octavia shrugs and crosses her arms in front of her chest to exemplify strength and determination. “If you have feelings for Clarke, is she not worth it to you to come back to?”

“Of course she is.” Lexa replies immediately. “But what happens if I don’t come back, huh? She may not have the feelings for me like I have for her, but she’s already lost too much.” Octavia gives Lexa a look of confusion, when she cocks her head to the side to look at the woman sitting on the bed. “Finn and Jake.” Lexa says, and Octavia’s eyes widen. “I don’t want to be the one to put her through something like that again. I can’t be the one to do that.”

“She told you about Finn and her dad?” Octavia asks, and Lexa nods. “Well, it seems to me, Lexa…” Octavia says, with a little too much disdain in her voice. “That Clarke sees something in you that she doesn’t in most. She never talks about them, so if she told you about them, then you must be doing something right. So, stop being a fucking baby and do something about it, will you?”

“What?” Lexa’s eyes shoot up. 

“If you like her, then go for it.” Octavia rolls her eyes at her own comment, realizing that she’s giving this woman permission to go for her best friend. “If you have to leave, eventually, then just make sure that you   
come back for her. To her and Finn. Because, God knows that, that boy loves you for some reason.” Lexa rolls her eyes, and Octavia makes her way out of the bedroom, but not before adding one more thing. “Girl’s night tonight.” She says firmly. “Maybe a little liquid courage will make the both of you start talking, and I swear to God, if you hurt them… I will destroy you.”

Lexa takes in a deep breath of air after Octavia leaves the room. Why does she believe that Octavia would do everything within her power to destroy Lexa if she were to hurt Clarke and Finn? That tiny woman is terrifying.

 

//

 

Once Octavia is gone, and Lexa has had time to just be inside her own thoughts, she decides to get ready and face the day that’s ahead of her. Lexa’s not going to lie… She’s nervous and scared and she has no clue as to what she’s supposed to be doing. Octavia pretty much told her to confess her feelings for Clarke, and just go with it day by day, but Lexa had to make sure that, if she left, she would come back to the blonde and her son. That, in Lexa’s mind, is a lot easier said than done. She hates making promises that she might not be able to keep. She likes to be sure of things before she puts herself in certain situations, but this is not like most situations. This is Clarke. This is Finn. Two people that came into her life like a freight train, and turned it upside down, and she means that in the best way possible.

Lexa throws on a pair of black skinny jeans and a tight, grey tank top. Over the tank top, she puts on a denim button up, leaving it open and flowing. She slips into her black Converse and walks out of the bedroom, slowly making her way towards the kitchen. When she gets there, she sees Raven and Octavia cooking pancakes and bacon, while Finn sits in the living room watching some new documentary on Netflix. “Still no Clarke?” She asks, looking over in the direction of the two other women.

“No.” Octavia answered, without looking up from the pan where she was frying the bacon. “I wouldn’t expect her to be too much longer. There’s only so much running that Clarke’s willing to do voluntarily.”

Lexa smirks at that, but then it falls again because she realizes that, more than likely, she is the reason that Clarke left to go running in the first place. Lexa makes her way over to the couch to plop down beside her favorite five-year-old. She slings her arm around his shoulders and pulls him closer, taking her fist and rubbing it on top of his head, ruffling his long, brown hair. “Stop it!” Finn says between giggles. “No fair!   
You’re bigger than me!” Lexa moves her hand from his head, finally, and pokes him once in the side, making him jump. 

“Morning, bud.” She smiles.

“Morning, Lex.” He gets himself situated back on the couch, the way that he was, only sitting a little bit closer to Lexa than before. “I get to go stay with Mrs. Caldwell and her granddaughter tonight.” He smiles from ear-to-ear, warming Lexa’s heart and making her mirror his expression.

“I heard. Are you excited?”

“Uh huh.” He nods his head, while his focus is all on the television screen, where some comet just collided with a planet. “Are you and mom going to go on a date?” Finn asks sweetly, turning his head so that he can look up at Lexa.

Lexa brings her hand up to smack herself in the forehead, causing the young boy to chuckle, and she lets out a loud sigh. “No.” She answers. “But I am hoping that I will get to talk to her alone.”

Finn hums like he’s trying to think of something to say. Something to retaliate with, but he, clearly, comes up with nothing, and turns his attention back to the screen. “What are you going to say?”

“I haven’t really thought about that.” Lexa answers truthfully, and she can’t believe that she’s having this conversation with Finn. Again. “I guess I’m just going to wing it.”

He looks at her, with amusement filling his blue eyes, and giggles again. “You can’t just wing it.”

“And why not?”

“Because you have to know what you’re going to say ahead of time. You have to be prepared.”

“Finn, I don’t even know what we are going to talk about.” She shrugs, leaning further back into the couch and crossing one leg on top of the opposite thigh. “Your mom and I are friends. We will be able to talk about it without any problems.” She’s pretty sure that that’s a lie, but she can’t tell Finn that. She’s really hoping that he will just drop the subject now.

“Whatever you say.” He says, and looks back at the screen, clearly finished with the conversation and Lexa lets out a breath that she didn’t realize that she was holding. This kid… He was something else. Too smart for his own good. And sneaky. He seemed to be trying to push her together with his mom, and she can’t help but wonder where he would even get such an idea. Not a moment later, Lexa catches a glimpse of Finn and Raven exchanging a wink across the room, and then it hits her. Of course, Raven is the one that’s made Finn start acting weird about her and his mom. 

“I saw that!” Lexa shouts teasingly, and points her index finger around the room and both Finn and Raven. The mischievous pair both look like deer caught in headlights. Their eyes are wide and their faces go, practically, pale. “You two,” Lexa starts, scooting closer to Finn and pulling him close to her so that he can’t leave. “Are in big trouble.”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.” Finn exclaims, trying his hardest to wiggle out of the tall, brunette’s hold. Lexa starts to tickle him, and he loses his breath because he’s laughing so hard. Around that time, Raven comes over and piles on top of them on the couch.

“Leave my little Finnigan alone!” She shouts, causing Lexa to look at her in amusement. She quickly lets go of Finn, and tackles Raven, causing them both to fall of the couch. Lexa has her in a choke hold, of course, it’s not a strong one, and Raven is slapping at Lexa’s arm. After a moment, Finn literally jumps off of the couch on top of the pair of friends. Luckily, he missed hitting Lexa’s stomach, and although it’s almost healed, it is still rather sore.

“Take that!” He chuckles, using his tiny fingers and poking Lexa in her ribs, causing her to let go of her grip on Raven.

“Okay!” Lexa manages in between laughs, and she’s able to finally set up and push both Raven and Finn off of her. “Okay! I give up!”

“Victory!” Raven shouts, as she stands up and lifts Finn in the air, before setting them both down onto the couch, while Lexa stays in the floor.

“What are you two up to?” Lexa asks, looking in between her friend and the boy. “And don’t tell me ‘nothing’, because I know you both better than that.”

“It was Raven’s idea!” Finn says quickly, not willing to take the fall for it, because it really was Raven’s idea.

“Traitor!” Raven yells, pushing the young kid teasingly. “You know that you wanted it too!”

“Wanted what?” Lexa asks curiously. 

“We were trying to get you and my mom together.” Finn answers, and Lexa doesn’t miss the slight pout that forms on his small face.

“Why?”

“Because you both can’t stop giving each other those – Finn earmuffs.” Raven says, practicing the new trick that she’s taught the boy. When she says ‘earmuffs’, Finn throws his hands up over his ears so that he can’t hear what she’s about to say. “Those damn heart eyes.” Lexa looks at her best friend with a smirk and shakes her head at Raven’s antics.  
Finn removes his ‘earmuffs’ as quick as he had put them on. “We don’t give each other ‘heart eyes’. Whatever that even means.” Lexa says, rolling her eyes in the process.

“You do.” Raven and Finn say in unison, and Finn laughs out loud and then finishes answering Lexa’s question of ‘why’. “You make my momma smile a lot.” He shrugs. “She doesn’t do that a lot. You have fun together, and I like hanging out with you too.”

Lexa can’t help but smile at the boy. She has fun with he and Clarke too. All the time, and she doesn’t know how she could ever leave them, because Clarke and Finn make her smile more than she can ever remember smiling. She would never admit it to anyone, not right now at least, but she feels like they’re her family. Along with Raven of course. She was supposed to meet them. “Your mom makes me smile a lot too, kid.” Lexa grins, and it actually feels good to say something like that out loud. “And so do you. You’re my best bud, you know?” Raven glares at her teasingly, but she knows what Lexa means.

“Really?” Lexa’s never seen the boy’s smile so wide. “You’re mine too.” Lexa feels like her heart swell at Finn’s words and she sits up on her knees on the floor and scoots over to the couch to pull Finn into a tight hug. He is happy to return it, and Raven starts gagging. 

“You two are so sappy.” 

“Shut up, Raven!” Finn and Lexa both say, and Lexa offers him a high five, and about that time they hear the backdoor open and Clarke steps through it. She’s wearing a hoodie and warm tights and Lexa happens to think that she looks adorable, especially with her messy bun falling out all around her face, framing it like the perfect picture. Clarke bends over to remove her tennis shoes, and she lets out a loud sigh when she stands back up to stretch. Lexa notices that the blonde looks tired, and not just from her run, but like she didn’t get any sleep or she’s had a lot on her mind. Her blue eyes are drooping a bit, and there seems to be dark spots under her eyes.

“Hey, mom!” Finn says, jumping up from his spot on the couch and running to hug his mother around her legs. Clarke smiles and squats down to return her son’s hug. “Did you have a good run?”

“I did.” She answers, and glances around the room as she stands back up. Clarke sees that Raven and Lexa are in the living room and Octavia is in the kitchen cleaning some dishes in the sink. “What’s everyone up to?”

“Me, Raven, and Lexa just had a tickle fight.” He grins, earning a chuckle from his mother. “And Aunt Octavia is finishing up with breakfast.”

“Sounds exciting.” Clarke says sarcastically, but her son doesn’t pick up on it. She picks him up and kisses him on his cheek.

“Yuck!”

“You know you love it.” Clarke smiles. “Are you ready to go to Mrs. Caldwell’s? I think she’s got quite a few activities set up for you and her granddaughter.”

“Yes, ma’am. I’m ready. Let me just run and get my bag.” He leaves and Lexa finds this as her in. She gets up off of the couch and makes her way over to Clarke. The blonde is slipping on her boots where her tennis shoes just were, and she looks up to see Lexa coming towards her. She feels her heart start pounding and she mentally curses herself. Not just for that, but for the way that she acted last night. She’s actually a little bit embarrassed. Clarke can’t believe that she gave in and actually told Lexa that she ‘needed to be close to her’. 

‘Like… who the fuck does that, Clarke?’ She thinks to herself, and then Lexa is standing beside her, and Clarke leans up to smile at her, shyly. 

“You know,” Lexa says. “I would have run with you – I mean if you wanted someone to.”

Clarke smiles again, because she doesn’t know what else to do. She feels so awkward. “It’s okay.” She replies. “I, uh – I kind of just needed to clear my head a bit.”

Lexa hums as she nods her head, looking down at her feet and sticking her hands in her back pockets. She rocks back on her heels once or twice before speaking again. She hopes that Clarke doesn’t hate her over what happened the previous night. “Would you like some company taking Finn to your neighbor’s?” She needed this. Lexa needed some alone time with Clarke, and she’s afraid that when they get back, she won’t have the chance.

“Um, sure.” About that time, Finn comes barreling towards them with a huge smile on his face and his bag slung over his shoulder.

“Wait.” Lexa says, before running down the hallway towards Clarke’s bedroom, leaving Clarke and Finn standing at the backdoor with confused looks. She’s back in no time. Lexa thought that she would go ahead and give Finn and early Christmas gift that had come in a couple of days before. She’s bought him plenty of presents, so this shouldn’t hurt anything. She pulls something from behind her back and places it on top of the boy’s head. “Thought that you might like to show off an early Christmas present to Mrs. Caldwell and her granddaughter.” She smiles, and Finn reaches up to remove the cap. He spins it around and sees the Padres logo on it. The inside of the bill is covered in signatures and he looks up at Lexa with wide eyes. “That’s the signatures of everyone on the team this year.” She grins when his smile widens, and she doesn’t miss the sweet, admiring smile on Clarke’s face. “Take care of it.”

“This is awesome!” He smiles and wraps his arms around Lexa’s legs. “Thanks, Lex! I can’t wait to show everybody!” 

“I’m glad that you like it.” She says, patting the top of his head. 

“Ready to go?” Clarke asks, and Finn takes off running out the door to jump in the car. “Thank you.” Clarke mouths at Lexa and the brunette can only nod. She hopes, to God, that this car ride turns out in her favor.   
She has to find a way to fix this thing with Clarke.

 

//

 

The drive over to Mrs. Caldwell’s wasn’t bad at all, because Finn was with them, but now, since they’ve dropped the boy off at Clarke’s neighbor’s house, things are a bit different. When Finn was with them, he acted as a buffer of sorts. He would keep different conversations going with the both of them, and Lexa, really, didn’t have to worry about what she was going to say next. That was, until now.

The pair would exchange glances, and small smiles every few moments or so, and Lexa was thankful for at least that. She was kind of freaking out. She felt like a teenager again, with a huge crush on the pretty girl that sat beside her in class. Lexa didn’t know what to say, and she started to wonder when she had lost her ‘cool’ factor, because, now, all that she is, is a big, nervous dork.

“So,” Lexa finally remarks, rubbing her thighs with the palms of her hands, unconsciously. “Finn seemed pretty excited to get out of the house for a while.”

Clarke hums in reply, and Lexa thinks that she may not even say anything, but of course she does. It wouldn’t be anything like Clarke to just block her out completely. “Yeah. He likes to hang out with other kids.   
There’s not very many around, at least that I know of. I’m sure that he will make a lot of friends when he starts school next year.” Blue eyes never leave the road, and Lexa feels a little empty inside because she hasn’t really made quality contact with them all day.

“Of course he will.” Lexa grins, and Clarke smiles, though she still doesn’t look the brunette’s way. “That kid is fantastic. Never met one quite like him before.” Lexa felt hopeful, seeing Clarke’s million-dollar smile. Her heart flutters in her chest, and, then, there’s that high-school-crush feeling again. “Clarke.” Lexa calls, and this time, Clarke peeks her way, but only for a second. “About last night, I – “

“Lexa, please.” The other woman sighs, and Lexa notices the grip on the steering wheel tighten slightly. “I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have done that. I had no right to put you in any sort of awkward position. Can we just – can we please forget that it happened?” The small grin that Clarke forces onto her face, is just that… Forced. It’s full of regret and a little bit of despair, and all that Lexa can think about doing, is telling Clarke that she doesn’t want to forget it. She wants to tell Clarke that she wants the same thing… to be close to her, even though Lexa isn’t quite sure what all that entails.

“Whatever you want, Clarke.” Lexa replies, and she wants to take it back. She really does, but it seems as if Clarke really wants to forget her admission from the previous night. Lexa feels a small sting of pain in her chest, and Clarke, admittedly, feels the same pain, but both of them are too oblivious to the others true feelings. They were both a mess.

 

//

 

Once they were home, Clarke went to her bedroom to just take a moment to herself. She needed a breather, and being around Lexa only made it worse. She felt like such a dumbass for doing something so stupid last night. What she had going with Lexa, in the way of friendship, was good, and she probably ruined it, or at least made it difficult as hell. She undresses and hops into the shower, with the hot, steaming water beating down on her back. Clarke runs her fingers through her wet hair and closes her eyes at the feeling of her nails on her scalp. She needed this after the morning that she had. She fucking hates running, but she had to get out of the house. She had to have room to herself to think, and that seemed like her only way out. She just wanted to forget. She wanted to take it all back.

In the kitchen, Lexa started on her homemade pizzas that she said that she would make for girl’s night. Raven and Octavia both sat at the kitchen counter, carrying on various conversations with Lexa to keep her entertained. “So, Lexa,” Octavia remarks, and it takes Lexa a little by surprise, because she’s not sure that other woman has ever started a conversation with her, other than the ones where she came in screaming at her. Lexa bends down, and places two pizzas into the oven and sets the timer, before turning around and resting her elbows on the counter in front of her and Clarke’s best friends. “Did you have the conversation with Clarke?”

Lexa lets her head hang down. She really doesn’t want to have another conversation about this, but she knows, with these two, it won’t ever stop. “No.” She replies softly. “I started to, but before I could say anything, she asked if we could just forget that it happened.”

Octavia lets out a groan, followed by a chuckle from Raven, who had just popped a raw pepperoni into her mouth. “That’s so Clarke.”

“If forgetting about it is what she wants to do, then that’s what I will try to do.” Lexa says.

The pair of women in front of her both roll their eyes, and Raven starts to say something else, but then Clarke walks into the room. Lexa internally groans, because, damn… Clarke’s hair is curly, but still a little wet from her shower. Clarke has barely any make-up on, and she’s wearing a pair of black leggings with an overly baggy, brown sweatshirt. Lexa chuckles a little when she sees the blonde’s big, boot socks. Clarke had told her a few days ago how obsessed she was with them, and Lexa, secretly, ordered Clarke several pair as part of her Christmas present. “Are you laughing at my socks?” Clarke feigns hurt, as she makes her way further into the kitchen and opens the refrigerator to take a beer out. She pops the cap off with her hand and turns it up.

“I would never make fun of your fuzzy socks, Clarke.” Lexa grins, glad that she was able to get another smile from the gorgeous woman.

“So, I’m guessing that you’re ready to get this party started?” Raven asks, looking Clarke up and down, and specifically at the way she’s downing her first beer.

Clarke shrugs her shoulders, and Lexa thinks that it’s adorable how much she and Finn look alike when they do that. “Might as well.” Clarke replies. “Want one?” She asks, looking at no one in particular, and all three women nod their heads. Once she passes the beers around, the four of them make their way into the living room while they wait for their pizzas to cook.

“Those pizzas better be edible, Woods.” Raven grumbles from the wingback chair in the far corner. Lexa takes the recliner because Octavia and Clarke are piled up on the couch. There’s plenty of room for Lexa there, but she doesn’t want to overstep any boundary. Lexa rolls her eyes, refusing to give her best friend the satisfaction of answers her. 

“Hey.” Clarke jumps in, giving an appointed glare to Raven. “Lexa happens to be a great cook.” Lexa smiles, and Clarke returns it. 

‘This might be easier than I thought.’ Lexa thinks to herself, her smile only widening at the thought. “Thank you.” Lexa remarks. “It’s glad to have at least one ally here.”

“Whatever, Woods.” The Latina woman rolls her eyes. “Let’s get this going.”

 

//

 

Two hours later, both pizzas are almost completely gone and there’s close to twenty empty beer bottles in the garbage can. The room is filled with loud laugher, and the occasional giggle. Raven is pretty drunk, which Lexa finds hilarious because it’s been so long since she’s seen the sight. The other three women, however, are only just buzzed… maybe a little tipsy. Octavia’s sitting up on the couch with her legs and feet to the side, lying across Clarke’s lap, and Raven has made the short move to the floor below the wingback chair that she was in earlier. Lexa is still seated comfortably in the recliner, holding onto her beer, and trying to be as subtle as possible when it comes to watching Clarke let loose a little. 

Lexa has definitely been pacing herself, because it’s been so long since she’s drank anything, other than the glass of wine they had with dinner a few nights ago. She doesn’t want to act like a complete idiot in front of Clarke, because she still really wants them to have another go at their conversation, if Clarke’s willing.

“Let’s play Never-Have-I-Ever!” Raven squeals and Lexa can only roll her eyes.

“Seriously, Reyes?” Lexa quips. “We are almost thirty years old and you still want to play high school games?”

“Hey! I’m only twenty-seven, fuck you very much, and I can’t be the only one that wants to play.”

“I’m in.” Clarke says, and Lexa looks to her and raises a brow and Clarke is quick to return it, followed by a very sexy smirk, that Lexa highly doubts Clarke realizes she does.

“Might as well.” Octavia says. “I’m about to fall asleep.”

“Fine.” Lexa utters when Raven gives her a pointed look. She won’t be the one to hold the party up, no matter how juvenile the game seems. “You’re up first, then, my friend.”  
Raven claps her hands and rubs them together as if she’s got some master plan forming in that genius brain of hers. “Let’s see… Never have I ever, been to prison.”

“What the hell?” Lexa exclaims, throwing a pillow at her best friend, but now she’s seriously thinking about rescinding her title. “It better not be like this all night.” Lexa argues before taking a big gulp of her drink, and of course, she’s the only one.

“Come on, Woods. It’s been too long since I’ve seen you drunk. I think that that should change.”

Lexa rolls her eyes, and she catches Clarke watching her out of the corner of her eye. “Never have I ever,” Lexa starts, racking her brain for something to say. She’s never been very good at drinking games.   
Especially this one. “Hacked into a top of the line military system to help my best friend escape from prison.” Lexa ends her turn by sticking out her tongue at Raven.

“Real mature.” She says before taking a sip of her beer.

Now, it was Clarke’s turn, and Lexa was curious as to which way she would go with this. Would she be the kind to single someone out, or would she broaden it up a bit? “Never have I ever…played a video game.”

“What?” Raven exclaims almost comically, causing Clarke to laugh and Lexa can’t help but to watch the blonde with a smile on her face. “You’re not American, Griffin.” Raven adds, and then she, Octavia, and Lexa all turn up their drinks, followed by a fist pump in the air by Clarke.

“Dork.” Lexa mouths at her and Clarke sticks her tongue out.

“Okay, okay.” Octavia clears her throat and sets up from her position on the sofa to get more comfortable. She gives Raven a sly look before speaking. “Never I have ever fantasized about someone in this room.”

“Define ‘fantasized’.” Raven says.

“Have you ever thought about kissing or doing something a little more interesting with someone in this room?” The short woman responds. “And you have to tell the truth, because at least two of us at a time no if the other is lying or not, and we will call you out on the bullshit.”

“So, you’re telling me that you haven’t been fantasizing about me?” Raven asks Octavia, causing the other woman to groan and Lexa and Clarke to laugh. “Hey. It’s okay, I guess. I’m an acquired taste.” And then she turns up her beer, receiving quizzical looks from Octavia and Clarke. “What? So, I may have used to had a crush on Woods. So what?”

Clarke chokes on air and Octavia has to pat on her back a few times. She chose not to comment when she’s got her breath back, she only turns up her beer and takes a gulp because she knows that Octavia will call her out about her feelings for Lexa if she doesn’t. And Clarke can’t blame Raven for fantasizing about the woman, because…damn… Lexa is gorgeous. Like super-model gorgeous, but the rest of the room doesn’t have to know who she’s fantasized about.

Lexa taking a sip of her drink doesn’t go unnoticed by Clarke and she can’t help but ask. “So, did you have a crush on Raven, as well?”

“Hell no.” Making a disgusted face, but then winking at her best friend.

“Oh.” Octavia grins devilishly. “Then you’ve fantasized about one of us?” She smirks, using her hand to gesture between herself and Clarke. Lexa is internally flipping her off and Octavia knows it.

“You’re the only other two in the room, aren’t you?”

After a couple of more minutes of arguing about who fantasized about whom, the game continued with Raven saying, “Never have I ever learned a ballroom dance.”

“Raven!” Lexa groans, and finishes off her beer.

“Wait. The great Alexandria Woods knows a ballroom dance?” Clarke teases, and Lexa’s mouth practically waters at the way the blonde’s tongue peeks out from between her teeth when she’s teasing.

“A ballroom dance?” Raven chuckles. “Shit. Lexa knows like everyone that there is to know.”

Clarke looks at Lexa, silently asking the questions, and somehow, like magic, Lexa practically reads her mind. “When you grow up with billionaires as your parents, you tend to learn and take part in a lot of different things.” Lexa shrugs. “My mom always pushed me to take dance lessons. I think that I took them for seven or eight years. I made for one hell of a prom date.” She smirks, and God… Clarke has to clench her thighs together, and she really hopes that no one notices.

“Yeah, I wouldn’t go that far.” Raven butts in. “But she does know Jiu Jitsu, and that’s pretty fucking awesome.”

“That was all my dad.” Lexa smiles, and Clarke is suddenly saddened by the fact that the brunette no longer has them in her life.

“Any other secrets that we should know about, Miss Woods?” Clarke teases.

Lexa grins at the blonde and shrugs again, her green eyes never looking away from blue ones. “Maybe you’ll find out one of these days.” And then a wink. “Let’s take a time out.” She adds. “I need to go get a new beer.”

Everyone agrees on the time out. Raven saying that she had to go to the bathroom, and Octavia saying that she needed to give her restaurant a call and make sure that the place was still standing without her there. Lexa was in the kitchen, and she didn’t realize that someone was behind her, before she almost turned into her and nearly spilt her beer. “Woah.” Lexa grins, as she balances the couple of bottles in her arms. “Sorry, Clarke. Didn’t know you were in here.” 

“It’s fine.” Clarke smiles. “I just came in here to grab a bottle of water.” Lexa moves out of her way so that she can get into the refrigerator and she leans up against the counter and sets the beers down, before crossing her arms in front of her chest. Once Clarke has her bottle of water, she leans on the opposite counter, facing Lexa. “Having fun?”

“I am.” Lexa answers with a nod. “Are you?”

Clarke nods too. “It’s been a while since I haven’t had Finn in the house at night. I miss him.”

“If you want to, we can call this off and we can go and pick him up.”

“No.” Clarke grins. “He will want to stay at Mrs. Caldwell’s tonight. He was excited about it. Thank you, though.” Lexa nods and it seems as if they stand there for a while before anything else is said. Clarke is too afraid to say anything at all, because the last time that she did, she made a complete and utter fool of herself, and Lexa wants to say something, she just doesn’t know how. Both messes.

“Clarke?”

“Hm?”

“I, uh – I want to talk about last night.”

“Lexa,” Clarke says softly, gulping down a bit of air that seems to be lodged in her throat, creating a dry spot there. “I told you that we didn’t have to – “

“I know.” Lexa says, shaking her head and taking a step forward. “But there’s something that I need to say, and I just – I want to make sure that it’s okay if I speak freely.”

Clarke pauses for a minute. She’s terrified of what Lexa could possibly want to say, but she nods anyways and allows the brunette to continue. “Uh, last night when – when you said that you… needed to be close to someone…”

“To you.” Clarke adds firmly, and she doesn’t know why because she vowed to herself that she wouldn’t speak of that again. Her throat seems to close up more as Lexa gets closer and closer to her.

Lexa nods in acknowledgment to Clarke’s statement. Of course Lexa remembered Clarke saying that she need to be close to Lexa, but Lexa wasn’t sure that Clarke would want her to acknowledge that. “To me.”   
Lexa shakes her head like she can’t comprehend that. “Why?” She asks, taking Clarke aback. “Why do you need to be close to… me?”

Clarkes eyes search across the whole of Lexa’s stunning, sculpted face. The brunette’s emerald eyes are shining, and Clarke can’t keep herself from spilling the words that she’s been holding back for days now. “Beca – because you’re you.” She shrugs. “You’re good.” Clarke mutters. “You’re good and silly and clever and sweet an – and beautiful. When I’m around you, I just – I can’t help but smile, no matter how my day is going.” Clarke is still watching Lexa, hoping that she doesn’t scare the woman away, but she can’t tell. She can’t tell, because Lexa’s face is as stoic and beautiful as ever. “And watching you with Finn… I’ve neve – he’s never had anyone like you to look up to, and hang out with, and learn things like how to throw a baseball with. He adores you, and I can’t thank you enough for the change that you’ve made in his life in the short amount of time that you’ve been here.” Clarke really hopes that Lexa can’t see how quickly she’s breathing. She feels out of breath, and the fact that Lexa keeps moving closer to her doesn’t help one bit.

“Finn is a fantastic kid, Clarke.” Lexa smiles a small smile. “But you’re the one that made him that way. You raised him, and I’ve never met a kid that’s better or smarter than him. I adore him, as well.” She says. “But you, Clarke Griffin, are something else… you’re everything that you said that I was times a thousand.” Lexa’s grin widens, and she realizes that she’s standing right in front of the blonde. Both of their chests are rising and falling as if they just complete some sort of marathon. “I was in the middle of a storm in my life.” She thinks about that statement before editing it. “I am in the middle of a storm in my life. I thought that everything was pretty much done for me, and that this chaos would ruin me even more than I already was.” Clarke sees how sad the taller woman looks, and she wants to reach out for her, but she refrains. “But, even in the middle of all of this chaos, that is my life, there’s you.” She smiles a sad smile. “You and Finn. And, of course, Raven, but you two Griffins have most definitely changed my life for the better, and I know that that’s a lot to say after only knowing you for a little over two weeks, but it’s the way I feel. It’s the truth.” Lexa looks a little embarrassed for saying all of that, Clarke sees.

She doesn’t know where she found the ability to find words, but she does, and she is able to at least form some sort of sentences to respond to Lexa. “I, uh – I guess – I don’t know… I guess that this means that we aren’t forgetting about what I said last night?” That was so damn embarrassing, still.

“I don’t want to forget about it.” Lexa says, and takes another step closer, and cups her hands around Clarke’s cheeks. The blonde closes her eyes at the contact. Lexa’s hands are warm and soft, and everything that she ever imagined and more. She feels the brunette start to smooth her skin with her thumbs, and Clarke doesn’t realize it, but she let a few tears get away from her. God, she is such a mess. She is finally able to meet Lexa’s eyes once more, and she doesn’t feel as weird about her own tears because Lexa has some too, though they haven’t fallen. “Thank you.” Lexa says softly. “Thank you for making me feel like me again.”  
Lexa leans forward, and Clarke feels her heart jump up into her throat. She feels her hands go clammy and her knees begin to wobble. Lexa stops just before their lips meet. They’re both about to go cross-eyed from looking into each other’s eyes from such a close distance. Lexa’s nose brushes up against Clarke’s but only slightly. Enough to make a shiver course through Clarke’s body and hers both. Clarke smells even more amazing this close. Of course, there’s a hint of beer, but otherwise, the blonde smells just as beautiful as Lexa thought that she would. Clarke smells like the earth after the rain. Fresh and free, and it’s all natural. 

Clarke thinks that she may die from the overwhelming desire to kiss Lexa right now, and she doesn’t know what the brunette’s waiting for, but before she can think any longer, Lexa barely whispers. “Is this okay?”   
She doesn’t want to assume anything. She wants to make sure that Clarke is comfortable and consenting to whatever is about to happen between the two of them. Lexa feels Clarke slowly nod in her hands, and then Lexa does the simplest thing in the world... She leans over and kisses Clarke, and her entire world split open in that moment.

It’s happening. It’s really happening, and Clarke thinks that she could die right now of happiness. Lexa’s lips are so full and soft and it’s all that she imagined it to be and more. Of course, Clarke is attractive, but that’s not why Lexa is kissing her. There’s a difference in kissing someone because they’re attractive and kissing someone because you can no longer find the words to accurately express your feelings for them, and that’s what Lexa is doing. She is trying to show Clarke what she feels instead of stumbling over her words.

Even though their eyes are closed as their lips move slowly and tenderly over one another, all that Clarke can see behind her eyelids is green. Green. Green. Green. It’s everywhere, and she loves it. 

Lexa moves her hands up from Clarke’s cheeks to tangle into her long, golden blonde hair, pulling Clarke impossibly closer. Gently, Lexa’s hands move through Clarke’s silky locks, and Clarke can’t help but smile a little into their kiss at how delicate Lexa is being with her. Lexa smiles too, and then pulls away, only to change the angle and move back in. At this, Clarke hands move down the smooth curve of Lexa’s sides to rest on the brunette’s hips, drawing her in so that Clarke can better steady herself. The way that Lexa is kissing her makes her weak in the knees, as cliché as that sounds. Clarke clings to Lexa like if she lets go, then she’ll wake up and this will all be but a dream. She wouldn’t doubt it, because it feels almost too good to be true.

This kiss is one that you hear about in novels or in some sort of cinematic experience. This kiss is one that feels as if it’s melding their two souls together in this moment.  
Lexa doesn’t know how long they kiss, and she doesn’t care. All time seems to have stopped just for the two of them, and when she finally makes herself pull away, she’s met with half-lidded, blue eyes that flicker from between her eyes back to her lips. Lexa smiles before leaning down and pressing one more peck to Clarke’s lips.

Luckily, for the pair, they broke apart just in time, because only seconds later, Raven and Octavia make their way back into the kitchen and living room area. “Yo!” Raven shouts, causing Lexa to step back from the blonde in front of her. “Let’s watch a movie. I’m over drinking games. You were right, Woods. I’m getting too old for this shit.”

“Is that okay with you?” Lexa turns to look back at Clarke, and the blonde nods because she still can’t seem to find her voice. Lexa must have fucking swallowed it. “What did you have in mind?” Lexa asks, turning and walking back into the living room. Octavia gives Clarke a look behind the other brunette’s back and Clarke only gestures for Octavia to sit in the recliner so that she and Lexa can sit on the couch. 

Clarke gets the lights after Raven decides on ‘The Goblet of Fire’. Octavia did as Clarke asked, and sat down in the recliner before Lexa could. The taller woman gave Octavia a weird look before shrugging and sitting down next to Clarke on the couch. Clarke draped a blanket over them as soon as Lexa sat down. They sat close enough that their thighs touched, but Clarke didn’t want Raven and Octavia hounding them right now, and she’s sure that Lexa didn’t want that either.

The two of them sit there in the darkness of Clarke’s living room, hands intertwined under the covers above them, and smiles on their faces that they can’t seem to lose. Neither of them watches the movie, because all that each of them can think about, is about what the hell just happened… and please God, let it happen again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> What did you think? Was that good enough for you or no? Let me know what you thought in the comments below, and don't forget the kudos. ;)
> 
> Love y'all!
> 
> Follow me on Twitter @asuzh90


	11. When I'm Near You

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> What's up, guys? I hope that everyone is doing well, and I'm sorry for the wait. Hopefully this update will make up for it. :)

Sometime, during the duration of the movie, Clarke had fallen asleep; her head draped over onto Lexa’s shoulder, beside her. Lexa didn’t mind one bit. It felt right to have Clarke right there. To have Clarke do the simplest of things and just lean over onto her. The movie was, now, finally over, and Raven got up from the couch and turned the television off, before grinning at her best friend and making her way back down into her ‘lair’. Octavia stretched in the recliner and eyeballed Lexa for a moment.

“You want me to wake her up?” The shorter woman asks, nodding her head in the direction of her best friend, whose head was leaning against Lexa’s shoulder.

“No.” Lexa replied with a small smile, and a gentle shake of her head. “I can, uh - I can carry her to her bed.” She didn’t miss the amused look that overtook Octavia’s face, but she really didn’t care. She found that   
she was sort of growing to like Octavia a little bit, even though she was a lot like Raven. Too much like Raven.

“Okay. I’m going to go shower, and then hit the hay.”

“Goodnight, Octavia.” Lexa says quietly, as to not wake Clarke up. The shorter woman nods her head in acknowledgement and takes off down the hallway, leaving Lexa on the couch, alone, with Clarke. She thinks through the process of what she may do to try and lift the blonde and carry her without waking her. After a moment or so, she turns her body on the couch, and slides one arm behind Clarke’s back, and the other under her legs. Lexa slides off of the couch, then, and lifts with her knees and back. Clarke’s not heavy at all, and it makes the trip down towards her bedroom that much easier.

Lexa thinks that she feels Clarke stir, in her arms, at one point, but she clearly dozes right back off. When she reaches Clarke’s bedroom door, she nudges it with her hip, causing it to open and she steps in, walking towards the bed. As she goes to lay Clarke down on top of the covers, blue eyes open and look up to meet her green ones. “Oh, good.” Lexa grins. “You’re not dead.”

“Har har.” Clarke mutters sarcastically. “Did yo – did you just carry me to my bedroom?”

“No. I caught you sleep walking. It was the damndest thing.” Lexa grins, earning her a slap on the arm from the sleepy blonde on the bed below her. Lexa laughs out loud, causing Clarke’s grin to widen and Lexa wants nothing more, than to see that smile for the rest of her life. It’s definitely a heart-melting smile. “I did carry you.” She finally answers. “You looked too peaceful to wake up.”

“Well, I appreciate it.” Clarke smiles sleepily, as she sits up on the edge of the bed, jutting her hand forward and grabbing onto Lexa’s shirt. Lexa grins back at her when the blonde starts to pull her closer to stand between her legs. “Did I tell you how gorgeous you look tonight?”

Clarke is sure that she sees Lexa blush, and she thinks that she’s never seen anything more endearing than seeing the big, bad Lexa Woods blushing at being called ‘gorgeous’. “Thank you.” Lexa replies softly, leaning down and taking a hand to wrap into blonde hair. “But I’ve got nothing on you.” She says, before slowly bringing her lips to Clarke’s. It’s been less than three hours since their first kiss and only kiss, but it’s still been way too damn long in Lexa’s opinion. 

Lexa finds herself getting lost in Clarke’s lips. The pillowy softness of them, and Clarke’s taste… God. It makes her want to stay here forever. She could kiss Clarke forever. Before she can work up the courage to seek permission with her tongue, she feels Clarke pulling back, so she does the same, trying to ignore the pout that wants to forms on her face. 

She hears Clarke hum just before opening her eyes to look into Lexa’s. “I could get used to that.” She says gently, her tired eyes, drooping as she speaks, and Lexa grins at how adorable it is.

“You should get dressed for bed, before you fall asleep.” Lexa says, standing up straight, and stretching her arms over her head. “I’m going to go in here and change.” Lexa points her thumb in the direction of Clarke’s bathroom before grabbing her pajamas and making her way in.

After Clarke changes into a pair of sweats and a big t-shirt, she piles into bed, and moves towards the center of it. Pulling the covers over her body, she can’t help but smile at everything that had happened throughout the night. Her admission to Lexa. Lexa’s admission to her. Their first kiss, and then this one… it all seemed too perfect, and she would be lying to herself if she said that she wasn’t terrified. She had only kissed one other person since Finn’s death, five years ago, and that was just a peck on the lips after the one date that she had with Niylah from the clinic. It was weird, but with Lexa… it was a good weird. A really good weird. Lexa made her feel comfortable. Lexa made her feel safe. She made Clarke feel like she was really at home, and she hasn’t felt that way in a long time.

Another minute or so, and the bathroom door is opening. Lexa steps out, wearing a pair of basketball shorts and a t-shirt. Her hair is in a low, messy bun, and Clarke grins at her as she walks past the bed. Clarke’s brow furrows when Lexa walks completely past the bed, and notices that she going to flick off the lights. “Are you going to sleep in the bed?” She asks quietly, hating the way that she sounded so needy.

“Is that what you want?” Lexa asks, her hand on the light switch, but she doesn’t turn flick it. She looks over her shoulder to Clarke, and the blonde nods her head with a small smile. Lexa smiles back, before flipping the switch and walking over to Clarke’s bed. She sinks into it, and rolls over onto her side to face Clarke. She sees that Clarke is in the center of the bed, rather than on her own side, and Lexa smiles.

“Scootch over here.” Clarke grins sleepily, and Lexa doesn’t hesitate to give the woman what she wants. Lexa inches closer and closer to the blonde, until she’s right beside her. Clarke smiles and so does Lexa, and they both just stare at each other for far longer than normal people should, but neither of them seems to care. Finally, Lexa moves her arm to where her hand is resting on Clarke’s hip. The blonde’s shirt had ridden up a bit, and Lexa’s hand makes contact with the smooth skin of Clarke’s side, but she doesn’t move it. She pulls Clarke closer to her and places a kiss to the tip of her nose. “You’re too cute.” Clarke mutters.

Lexa scoffs teasingly. “I am not cute.”

“Yep. You are.” Clarke replies before kissing Lexa on the lips a couple of times. Her lips, then, move down the Lexa’s sculpted jaw, where Clarke is sure to kiss every inch, before she makes her way up to Lexa’s tiny ear. She kisses under it, before nipping her earlobe a little with teeth. Clarke giggles when Lexa jumps a bit, and lets out the quietest of moans. “I happen to like it.” Clarke breathes against the brunette’s ear, before moving back down her jaw with feather-light kisses, and then down Lexa’s neck.

Subconsciously, Lexa moves her head back a little, to allow the blonde room to work. Clarke kisses and sucks softly across Lexa’s pulse point and down to the center of her neck. She likes the small feeling of power. She most definitely finds it extremely sexy, the noises that Lexa lets out as she kisses and nips at the brunette’s soft skin. She stops a few moments later, after making her way back up to peck Lexa on the lips lightly. “Night, Lex.” Lexa leans back in for one more short kiss and smiles into it, wrapping her arm tighter around Clarke.

“Goodnight, Clarke.”

 

//

 

Lexa wakes the next morning, with the sun beaming straight down onto her face. She rolls over, facing the opposite way, before opening her eyes, and the first thing that she notices, is that Clarke is gone. She was really hoping to wake up, for the first time, next to Clarke, where she was actually able to move the short distance over and press her lips to Clarke’s. 

All of the memories from the previous night flash through her mind, and she can feel the smile widening on her face. Her heart starts to beat at a quicker rate, and she closes her eyes for a second to try and pace herself. After another few seconds, she wills herself to open her eyes and sling the covers off of her body. Once she’s out of bed, she pads her way to Clarke’s bathroom to freshen up. After brushing her teeth, she fixes her hair back up into a bun, where it had fallen during sleep, and then makes her way out of the bedroom to walk towards the kitchen.

As Lexa approaches the kitchen/living room area, she hears a familiar set of people laughing, and the sound warms her heart, creating a smile to form on her face. She peeks her head around the corner of the hallway to watch as Clarke and Finn tickle each other on the couch. Clarke’s blonde hair is covering her face, as she leans down, her hands flowing over Finn’s tiny sides as her fingers tickle his ribs.

“Momma, stop it.” Finn exclaims in between laughs. He is almost out of breath by the time that Clarke finally stops, and she pulls him up to sit in her lap.

“I won!” Clarke says, throwing her arms up in victory and jumping in her seat. Lexa laughs to herself as she watches the beautiful woman and her perfect son playing, laughing, and having fun. She can’t believe, that just three short weeks ago, she was practically rotting in a cell that she had been in for ten years. She never imagined that she would ever be out, and much less, in a situation like this. To be surrounded by people who changed her life with the drop of a hat. People who she has learned to trust, and that actually trust her back. Clarke believes in her, and that’s something that she hasn’t felt in so long, ever since her parent’s.

After another minute or so, Lexa makes her way further into the room, and that’s when Finn finally sees her. “Lex!” He yells, and jumps from his mother’s lap to run towards the tall brunette. Clarke’s head spins around, over the couch, in time for her to see her son wrap his arms around Lexa’s long legs, and hug her. Her heart swells at the sight, and she lets out a content sigh. 

“Morning, bud.” Lexa grins, and she kneels and hugs the small boy. “How did you get here? Did you have fun at Mrs. Caldwell’s?”

“Mom came to get me this morning.” He smiles. “I had so much fun. I showed Mrs. Caldwell’s granddaughter how to throw a baseball. Can we, please, play catch later?” 

Lexa laughs at the sweet kid. “Of course, we can. Have you eaten breakfast yet? I can make you some French toast.”

“Oh, French toast sounds good!”

“Yeah?” Lexa asks and Finn nods frantically, causing Lexa to laugh out loud and glance up to his mom, who was now getting up off of the couch. “Well, how about you go turn on a movie, and I’ll get started on breakfast?”

“Okay. Thanks, Lexa.” He says sweetly, before making his way past his mother to plop down on the couch and grabbing the remote. Clarke smiles down at him before making her way over to Lexa.

“Morning.” Lexa smiles widely to the blonde walking up in front of her. Clarke smiles back before grabbing Lexa’s wrist and pulling the taller woman the few steps back, into the hallway so that they weren’t visible to Finn.

“Good morning.” Clarke says quietly as she wraps her arms around Lexa’s neck and kisses her lips. It’s a weird feeling, getting to do this, after what feels like an eternity of waiting, but it’s most definitely a good weird. Lexa’s hands move to the curve of Clarke’s hips, pulling her closer against her body, causing a soft whimper to leave the blonde’s lips. 

Lexa pulls back, but only slightly, to smile at Clarke sweetly. Her nose brushes softly against the blonde’s, before she’s moving back in to kiss Clarke’s full lips. This time, she finally pushes up the courage to lick across the other woman’s bottom lip, seeking permission into Clarke’s warm mouth, and Clarke is more than happy to give it to her. Their tongues dance around each other, synchronized and coordinated. When Clarke’s tongue licks at the roof of Lexa’s mouth, it earns her an audible moan from the brunette. Lexa pushes Clarke up against the wall behind her and her hands move to the small of Clarke’s back, as Clarke’s fingers move up to tangle in long, brown locks. 

They’re not quite sure how long they stay like that; tongues moving together, breaths and pants melding into one, but they are broken apart at the sound of a door, down the hallway, opening. The women jump apart quickly, and immediately move to straighten out their hair and clothes. After a couple of seconds, Octavia appears in the hallway and walks past them, giving Clarke and Lexa, both, knowing looks. Once she’s out of earshot, the two women chuckle softly, before Clarke leans in for one more, quick kiss. “Want some help making breakfast?” She smiles sweetly.

“That would be great.” Lexa smiles right back, knowing that, as long as Clarke was near her, that would be okay with her. She leans back in, just because she can, and gives her blonde savior one more kiss before they make their way back into the kitchen.

 

//

 

“Mom!” Finn exclaims. He is still sitting at the kitchen island, where the entire household just finished with their breakfast. Lexa and Clarke had made more than enough French toast for everyone, and, for that, they were thankful. “Can we please, please, please, please, please go to the park?” His voice is set in a higher pitch than usual and the four women around him can’t help but laugh at his pleading. Clarke rolls her eyes at her son and smiles. 

“If that’s what you want to do today, then yes, we can go to the park.”

Finn throws both arms in the air and woots, before jumping off of his stool and running down the hallway towards his room. Raven thanks Lexa and Clarke and makes her way back down to the basement, saying that she had to make a couple of phone calls, and Octavia went to grab her clothes from Finn’s room so that she could change and get ready for their park trip. Lexa turns to the sink to start washing the few dishes that they have left dirty, and she feels, rather than sees Clarke’s presence next to her. She looks over to the blonde, giving her a small smile, and she notices Clarke’s face fall after a few seconds. “What is it?” Lexa asks softly, her hands covered in suds or she would turn to place her hands on Clarke somehow. 

“I jus – you’re not going to go, are you?” Clarke knew that Lexa wouldn’t go with them to the park. She was too afraid of someone seeing her, and especially seeing her with Clarke. Lexa didn’t want anyone to think   
that Clarke had anything to do with her escaping. She had only made the one outing, when she and Clarke went shopping, but when the news dropped that she was on the FBI’s Most Wanted List, she refused to go out again. Lexa and Raven both knew that it would be harder and harder to stay hidden, so they thought it best for Lexa to stay at the house.

“No.” Lexa smiles sadly. She, honestly, would like nothing more than to spend the day with Clarke and Finn at the park; playing catch and laughing the day away, but she knew that that wouldn’t be possible. Not right now. “It’s okay, though. I really should see if there’s anything that I can do to help Raven today.” Lexa sees that Clarke, still, isn’t too excited with the fact that she’s staying here. “Hey,” Lexa says, taking her hands out of the dish water, and drying them with the towel that’s hanging over the faucet. After their dried off, she moves her hands to Clarke’s waist. “It’s okay.” She repeats herself, and smiles at the gorgeous blue eyes in front of her. “I can’t risk it. Being seen is one thing, but being seen with you,” Lexa shakes her head and looks up at the ceiling for a split second before look back to Clarke. “I won’t put you and Finn at risk.”

“I know.” Clarke sighs, shaking her head a bit, as well. She slings her arms over Lexa’s shoulders and her hands play with the baby hairs at the base of Lexa’s skull. “It just sucks.” She pouts and Lexa chuckles. “I hate that you have to stay hidden. It’s not fair to you. You’ve done nothing wrong.”

“You’re right. It does suck, but maybe someday I won’t have to hide. Maybe someday my name will be cleared and I’ll be able to bring justice to my parents’ murderer.” Lexa’s smile is another sad one. Up until this point, she had almost forgotten why she was here in the first place. She’s been so wrapped up in Clarke, and this dream of a life, that she almost forgot her agenda.

Clarke exhales and leans her forehead against Lexa’s collarbone. “Does this feel weird to you?” Clarke, finally asks after a brief moment of silence between she and Lexa. She pulls her head back to look up, and Lexa raises a brow in question. She has no clue as to what Clarke is talking about. “I mean – this.” She uses a hand to gesture between the two of them. 

Lexa stares at Clarke a little more before speaking. She really hopes that Clarke isn’t starting to regret whatever it is that they’ve started together. Lexa doesn’t know if she could handle that right now. “It is weird.”   
She answers. “But a good weird, I mean – at least to me it is. Are – are you having second thoughts? You know, I didn’t mean to – I mean, I sort of just pushed myself on you last night. My feelings, that is.”

“What?” Clarkes asks, as her eyes widen a little. “Of course I don’t regret any of this. And you didn’t push yourself on me last night. You remember the night before last, when I practically crawled into your bed and told you that I wanted to be close to you?” Clarke giggles, and Lexa smiles at the woman in her arms. “I have to admit, now, that I didn’t really think that through. It was definitely creepy.”

Lexa lets out a loud laugh at that and leans down to press a kiss to Clarke’s nose. “It wasn’t creepy. It just caught me off guard, and I was too afraid to start something with you, knowing that it could end horribly.”

“Everything can end horribly at some point.” Clarke shrugs. “Sometimes, we just have to go out on a limb… go with our gut, you know?”

Lexa hums in response. “And what does your gut say, Clarke Griffin?”

Clarke smiles and leans a little bit closer to Lexa, their breaths mingling together in between them. The blonde knows what her gut is telling her, but she can’t bring herself to say something like that just yet. She’s not ready. They’re most definitely not ready. “It’s telling me to do this.” She utters just above a whisper, and slowly leans in to press her lips to Lexa’s. This kiss is slower than the one that they shared in the hallway, before breakfast. It’s more than a kiss. It’s more than the need to be close to each other, and to feel each other.

This kiss is a promise.

A promise, that no matter what happens, no matter what goes down in Lexa’s search for justice, they will be there for each other. If, at some point, Lexa has to leave Clarke and Finn behind, she promises to come back to them. For them. Lexa knows, now, more than ever, that she was meant to run into this house. Into this woman. And, come hell or high water, she’s not letting this go.

 

//

 

Clarke, Finn, and Octavia left about an hour later, and Lexa quickly made her way down into the basement with her best friend. The intel and feeds have been slow the past couple of days, since Lincoln and Nyko are on Emerson’s trail. As far as Lexa knows, it’s been radio silent from her other two friends… that is until Raven tells her otherwise. “Just got off the phone with Nyko.” Raven says, spinning around when she hears Lexa come down the stairs. The taller brunette stands beside Raven and crosses her arms in front of her chest as she rocks back and forth on her heels. “He said that him and Lincoln feel like they’re getting pretty close.”

“Close to what?”

“To finding this Emerson fucker.” Raven answers firmly, looking back at her computer screens and typing something in, but her fingers move too fast for Lexa to see what she’s typing. 

“That’s good.” Lexa replies. “Next time you talk, tell them that I want him.” Raven looks back up to watch her friend with quizzical eyes. Lexa’s face is as stoic as ever, as her arms are still crossed in front of her body. Raven can see the other woman’s hands tighten around her own biceps.

“What?”

Lexa inhales, and then slowly lets out the breath before walking over to the couch and plopping down. Raven can tell that her friend is trying to keep her cool. She knows that Lexa hates even thinking about this guy, but it’s stuff that she needs to know. “Tell Lincoln to bring this Emerson to me.”

“Why? What will that accomplish? You can’t just bring someone like that here. This is Clarke’s place.” The Latina woman says, spinning her chair around to face her best friend behind her. Raven leans over and places her forearms onto her thighs and watches Lexa’s face intently. 

“I know that this is Clarke’s place, Raven.” Lexa says, gritting her teeth in the process. She doesn’t want to lose her cool with her friend, she just hates even thinking about this guy and what he did to her parents.   
Well, they don’t know that he did anything for sure, but things aren’t looking up for him. “We won’t bring him here. There’s an abandoned shed out in the woods, a good ways from here. I saw it on one of my walks   
with Clarke and Finn. We will take him there.”

“Okay, but that still doesn’t answer my question.” Raven says. “What does that accomplish? What are you going to do?”

There’s quite a while of silence. Lexa looking down at her feet, twiddling her thumbs, as Raven watches her keenly. Raven is almost afraid to hear Lexa’s answer. She’s not sure that she’s ever seen Lexa like this.   
It’s different, and not necessarily a good different. “He’s going to pay for what he did.” Lexa answers, finally, her eyes never meeting Raven’s. 

“Lexa,” Raven mutters, almost under her breath. She shakes her head, trying to think of anything and everything that she can say to her friend to take her mind from this dark, dark place. “You can’t hurt him.” And that’s when Lexa’s eyes, finally, pop up to meet her best friend’s. 

“Do you know what he did?” Lexa yells. Like straight out yells, startling Raven, making her jump back in her rolling chair. “Do you know how he killed them?” She asks, her voice only seeming to get louder, and Raven is thankful that they’re the only two in the house at the moment. She can see tears start to form in Lexa’s eyes, but she doesn’t let them fall. She holds them in, and pushes all of her anger out. “I saw it! I saw them! His fate will match theirs times ten!”

At this point, Raven is, basically, terrified. She’s never seen Lexa act this way before. It’s scary, and very uncharacteristic of her, and Raven is starting to wonder what’s really going on in her best friend’s head. “Lexa, I know.” Raven says softly, hoping that her voice isn’t trembling like the rest of her body is. “I know how awful it was. I didn’t see it, but I don’t need to. I know that what he did can never be justified or forgotten. I know that you will never forget what you saw, but Lex,” Raven swallows at the dry lump that has now formed in her throat. “Hurting someone – killing someone is not the answer. You’re trying to clear your name, remember? You can’t do something like that. You have your whole life ahead of you, and this isn’t you.”

Lexa sighs and her shoulders slump. She knows that Raven is right, but she also knows, in the back of her mind, that this has to happen. At least, that’s what she thinks. “Raven, you don’t understand – “

“I do understand.” Raven interrupts. “Everything about the whole situation is beyond fucked up, and now – now you have other people in your life. People that are invested in you, and you in them.” Raven takes a breath, hoping that bringing up a certain blonde isn’t considered overstepping. “I know that you’re – that you’ve been getting closer to Clarke, and to Finn… What would Clarke think about this? I don’t know Clarke as well as you, but I do know that she wouldn’t want you to do something like this.”

Lexa sighs, and Raven notices her friend bring a hand up to wipe a tear from her cheek. They sit in silence for what feels like an eternity, and Raven never takes her eyes off of Lexa. “You’re right.” Lexa says softly, causing Raven’s eyes to widen. She didn’t think that Lexa would give up on her idea that easily. “I can’t believe I – this isn’t me. I’m,” She wipes at her face again, and all that she can see, when she closes her eyes, is Clarke, and the little boy that have both found their way into her heart. They slipped through the cracks there, and dug their claws in, and Lexa knows that she will never, ever let them go. Raven is right. Clarke would definitely not agree to what she was just thinking about doing. She let her jealousy get the better of her, and it was almost as if she had become feral. “You’re right.” She repeats herself. “Clarke wouldn’t want me to even think that.”

Raven moves over to the couch and slings her arm around her best friend’s shoulders, and after another couple of moments of silence, she lets out a chuckle, causing Lexa to look at her with a raised brow. “Sorry.”   
Raven says with a small smirk, and Lexa still looks confused. “It’s just – I know that this was a serious moment and all, and I’m glad that you’re not seriously going crazy, but you are so fucking whipped.”

“What?” Lexa exclaims, moving her body out from under Raven’s arm, causing her friend to laugh out loud. “I am not whipped!” She crosses her arms in front of her chest again, and pouts like a five-year-old, causing Raven to laugh even louder.

“So, are you and Clarke together or what?” Raven pushes even further, seeing if she can get Lexa to fess up to whatever it is that she’s got going on with the blonde. She knows that something has changed with them. Their dynamic and their tension are both different.

“No.” Lexa replies, knowing that it’s not a complete lie. She doesn’t really know if she and Clarke are ‘together’ or not. She’s not even entirely sure as to what that means. She wants to be with Clarke, though. That is for certain.

“Okay.” Raven grins. “So you won’t mind if I try to get with that? Because – damn! I mean, Clarke, has the nicest pair of –“

“Stop!” Lexa yells, pushing her friend nearly off of the couch, and Raven is holding her ribs because she’s laughing so hard. “We kissed.” She finally says, just wanting to go ahead and rip the band-aid off. She knew that Raven would find out sooner or later. Lexa wants to let her friend get all of her teasing out of her system before Clarke gets back, because, God… that would be way too embarrassing. Raven never knows when to shut up.

“Kissed, huh?” Raven asks. “Was it good? Was there tongue?” Lexa scrunches her forehead and nose at the last question, because she really doesn’t want to give all of the details away, but she does anyway.

“Not in the first one.” Lexa answers. “Or the second one, for that matter.”

“What? You’ve kissed twice? Holy shit! I wasn’t expecting you to have game, Woods.”

“You know that I’ve always had game, Reyes.”

“Yeah, but you’ve been locked up for a while. I guess you had a lot of practice in the pen.” Raven teases and Lexa scrunches her nose again in disgust.

“Okay, just no –“ Lexa says, shaking her head and grinning at her friend beside her. “To answer your first question… I don’t know. I don’t know if Clarke and I are together. We haven’t really talked about what we are. We’ve just talked about our feelings, and we both feel the same way, at least right now.” Raven hums, and nods her head as she listens. All teasing is gone now. “I really like her, Ray.” Lexa adds. “Like a lot. I’ve nev – I’ve never felt this way before.”

“I’m happy for you, Lex.” Raven says, wrapping her arm around her friend again. “Now, let’s just get this Emerson and Nia shit situated – the right way – and maybe we can get your life back on track. You deserve to   
be happy, and if Clarke makes you happy, then I am all for Team Clexa.”

“Clexa?” Lexa smirks as she raises an eyebrow. “What the hell is a ‘Clexa’?”

Raven laughs. “’Clexa’ is your name and Clarke’s name together, you like? Finn and I came up with it.”

“You’re unbelievable. You know that, right?”

 

//

 

“Don’t go too far, Finn!” Clarke hollers from, her place on the bench, beside Octavia. The three of them have had a good day, so far, at the park, and now Finn has found a few more kids to play with. Clarke and Octavia take the time to sit and talk as they watch Finn from nearby.

It’s a gorgeous day. It’s still very chilly, but the sun is out, and that makes everything feel a little bit better. Clarke had made sure to make Finn bundle up before they left the house, because she doesn’t want her little man to get sick. Especially, this close to Christmas. 

Clarke smiles wide, as her son runs around with all of the other kids at the park. He’s laughing and having the best time, it seems like. She knows that he’s ready to start school, and she’s very excited for him to finally have people his age for friends. As she watches him, her mind starts to wander back to Lexa, and everything that’s happened since the previous night. It already seems like a lifetime ago. Her feelings have only grown from there, and she can’t wait to get back home to see her. ‘I’m pathetic.’ Clarke thinks to herself. ‘I just saw her a few hours ago.’

The way that Octavia keeps looking at her, her friend seems to think that she’s knows something. The small woman’s eyes keep flicking over towards her, and Clarke keeps receiving knowing looks, so she finally just decides to try and get this conversation out of the way. “What?” Clarke asks, looking over to her friend, on the opposite side of the bench, and Octavia raises an eyebrow. “You keep looking at me like you want to say something.” The blonde adds.

“I don’t know.” Octavia shrugs, and leans back into the bench to cross her legs. “Something is just different today. You’re acting strange.”

“How am I acting strange?”

Octavia chuckles at the face that her best friend just made at her before speaking again. “Well, for starters, you’ve been smiling at something every time that I look over at you.” Clarke gives her another questioning look and she continues. “I haven’t seen you smile this much in a long time, so either you’ve heard one of the best damn jokes in the world, or you and Woods finally banged it out.”

“Octavia!” Clarke shouts, louder than she meant to. Her eyes go wide, and she leans over to shove at her friend. “Lexa and I have most definitely not banged anything out.”

“But you want to.”

“What? No!” Clarke replies equally as loud. “I mean – yes, wait… no!” Clarke groans. “I’m so confused.” She gives up when Octavia bends over laughing. The shorter woman is holding on to her ribs like she may actually lose them from laughing so hard. After her friend ceases her laughing, there’s another few seconds of silence before Clarke speaks again. “We kissed.”

“Finally.”

Clarke shoots her friend another look, and then sighs, leaning back against the bench and turning her head up to the beautiful, blue sky above them. Clarke closes her eyes, and suddenly, all that she can see is green, and all that she can feel is Lexa’s soft, full lips on her own. She can feel Lexa’s hands running across her back, in an intense but calming dance, of sorts. “She’s so great, O.” Clarke says, drawing Octavia’s attention back over to her. “Like – I haven’t felt like this in such a long time. It’s fucking terrifying.”

“I’m sure, that after all of this time, it’s scary getting back into the dating world – or whatever this thing is with Woods, but – I know that I was an ass to her in the beginning, but you were right, Clarke.” Octavia says, as Clarke listens to her friend intently. “I should have listened to you and believed you when you said that she was innocent. She seems like a really great person, and I know that she’s head over heels for you.” Octavia smiles, earning herself one back from Clarke. “I’m happy to see you happy, and Finn too. He seems to really, genuinely like her too.”

Clarke lets out an audible sigh, scooting closer to Octavia and lying her head over onto her shoulder. “I have to admit that that’s what started all of this, I think.” There’s a pause and Clarke can practically feel the inquisitive look radiating from off of the other woman. “Seeing the way that she acts with Finn, and the way that he responds back. It’s just – it’s really attractive to me to see someone put so much time and effort into making a child’s day. Especially my child’s day.” Clarke grins to herself, as her heart warms just thinking about Lexa and Finn. “And with me – she’s just so reassuring. No matter what kind of day that I’ve had, at the end of it, she always makes me feel better. Her smile – it’s just so warm and inviting, and I really, really can’t seem to get enough of it.”

Octavia makes a fake gagging sound, and Clarke leans back to look at her friend with a furrowed brow, but also with a hint of amusement on her face. “You two are so gross. Seriously.” Octavia says with a grin. “But I have to admit that it’s so fucking adorable.” At this, Clarke laughs out loud and leans her head back over onto Octavia’s shoulder.

“I hate that she couldn’t come today.”

“Yeah. That does suck. Maybe she and Raven will get this shit situated and she can finally have a normal life.”

“Is it weird, or too early or something, for me to hope that she wants to spend her normal life with Finn and I?” Clarke asks seriously. It’s something that’s been stuck in the back of her mind for the past couple of hours. Lexa’s been locked up for so long, she may not actually know what she wants. As soon as she’s able, Lexa will, more than likely, want to leave and see the world or do other things. She’s not going to want to stay around in this tiny town with Clarke, and she’s probably not ready to settle down and be ready to help take care of a child. Right?

“I don’t think it’s weird.” Octavia answers. “I mean, it’s definitely happening pretty quick – all of these feelings that you seem to have for her, but I don’t think it’s weird. Not if that’s how you feel. It’s definitely understandable.”

Clarke doesn’t reply. The two friends sit there, on the park bench, in silence; watching Finn play with the other kids, off in the distance. He’s laughing and having the best time, and at one point a little girl runs up to hug him and Clarke can see his blush from where she’s sitting. She and Octavia both chuckle at the sight.

“Shit.” Clarke grumbles, after another few seconds. She lifts her head off of Octavia’s shoulder, stands from the bench, and grabs her purse. Octavia looks at her, as if to ask ‘what is it’. “I haven’t gotten Lexa anything for Christmas yet.”

“Well, we best go find something while we’re out. Only a few days left.” Octavia grins. “What have you got in mind? I mean, what do you get someone like Lexa, who’s got all kinds of money?”

“You’re not helping.” Clarke utters, and takes a deep breath. “I’ve actually already started a small charcoal drawing for her, but I need to do something else.” She stands there, thinking about her options, when it finally hits her. “You know how Finn likes for me to take pictures of everything?” She asks Octavia, and her friend nods. “Well, over the past several days, the three of us have taken a lot of pictures together. I took a lot after our ‘food fight’ the other day, and I’ve got some of Finn and Lexa playing baseball, and a couple of just goofy ones with the three of us. You think that, maybe, she’d like a picture album or something? I mean, she probably doesn’t have any kind of pictures. Is it wrong to presume that she might want pictures of Finn and I?”

“Slow down there, Maverick.” Octavia chuckles. “That, actually, sounds like a great idea. I think that Lexa would love a photo album, but I do think that you should get a few more before you get them developed from your phone.” The shorter woman says. “I can come back in a couple of days to get them developed for you.”

“Yeah?” Clarke smiles widely. “You really think she’ll like it?”

“I think she’ll love it.”

 

//

 

A few hours later, the sun is starting to set when Clarke, Finn, and Octavia come back to the house. Raven was in the kitchen, making dinner for everybody, which shocked the hell out of Clarke, but she was thankful, nonetheless. Clarke had asked the Latina woman where Lexa was, and Raven told her that she was still in the basement. She didn’t tell her about Lexa’s almost, mental breakdown of some kind, earlier in the day. 

Clarke made her way down the hallway, tossing her purse into her bedroom before continuing to the basement. The first thing that she noticed, was that the lights were all off downstairs. The only light in the room was coming from the computer screens that were still lit up around her. The next thing that Clarke noticed, was the stunning, sleeping brunette woman on the couch. Clarke smiles so big at the sight. Lexa is so gorgeous, lying there, on her side, facing Clarke. Her brown hair is scattered everywhere, and her lips are parted slightly. Clarke can see that her breathing is even the way that her chest rises and falls every so often. She thinks, that if it wasn’t creepy, she could sit here and watch Lexa sleep all evening.

She really doesn’t expect anyone to come downstairs anytime soon, because Raven is cooking and Octavia had told Finn that she would help him put together a puzzle in the living room floor. Clarke decides that it would be okay to lie down with Lexa, and rest for a bit. There’s enough room left on the couch for Clarke to lay in front of the other woman, comfortably. She lies on her side, facing Lexa, and her eyes look over all of the details in Lexa’s flawless, sleeping face. She wants to run her fingers over the perfect jawline, and those full lips that are so tempting to just reach over and kiss. She thinks about how much she misses Lexa’s touch and it’s only been a few hours since the last time that they’ve seen each other.

“You’re staring.” A groggy voice mutters, breaking Clarke out of her thoughts, and she can’t help but laugh.

“Damn it!” She says, and Lexa smiles, but her eyes still aren’t open. “How do you do that? I mean, it’s every time.”

“The fact that I’ve caught you staring more than three times, is a little frightening.” Lexa teases, with her eyes still closed, and her voice still sleepy and low.

“Shut up.” Clarke groans, and scoots a little closer. “Besides, I don’t care that you caught me. I’m just admiring.”

Lexa chuckles and finally opens her eyes, and the sight of each other, almost takes both of their breaths away. “Sap.” Lexa teases, and Clarke shrugs. “C’mere.” The brunette whispers, and Clarke does as she’s told. She scoots even closer, until her nose is brushing against Lexa’s, and she’s certain that her heart is about to break out of her chest. When Lexa leans in to close the distance between them, a shiver runs up Clarke’s spine as their lips meet. It’s the only thing that she’s thought about the entire day, and it’s everything that she knew it would be. 

Lexa kisses her softly and tenderly, and Clarke moves her hand to rest on Lexa’s waist, pulling their bodies even closer together. This time, it’s Clarke who starts to seek entrance with her tongue, as she swipes it across the other woman’s bottom lip, and Lexa is more than happy to oblige. A moan escapes Lexa’s lips as Clarke’s tongue licks across the roof of her mouth. Her hand moves to caress and cup around Clarke’s cheek, and the feeling of her soft, smooth skin under Lexa’s calloused hands is everything that she never knew that she needed. 

They have to break away to breathe, but the separation is short lived, and this time, there seems to be a lot more heat between them. Lexa’s grasp on Clarke’s face, pulls her impossibly closer, and Clarke’s hand on Lexa’s waist, makes its way under the hem of the brunette’s shirt. Clarke’s warm hands against her cool skin, cause Lexa to shiver and small bumps to form on her body. Nails scratch, softly, against Lexa’s back, and that’s when she decides to take things into her own hands. Using her legs and a bit of upper body strength, Lexa rolls them, so that Clarke is sitting on top of her, and Clarke lets out a surprised gasp, but her mouth never leaves Lexa’s. The blonde’s legs are straddled across Lexa’s hips and upper thighs, and her hands move, to keep herself upright, to either side of Lexa’s on the couch.

Lexa, finally, moves her hands up under Clarke’s shirt and up to the other woman’s ribs, where her nails scratch lightly, and her mouth moves from Clarke’s lips to her jaw and down to her pulse point where she licks and sucks. This causes a certain sensation to flow and shock through Clarke’s body. “Fuck.” Clarke moans out, as she sits up a little straighter, and Lexa just follows her, continuing her assault on the blonde’s neck. They’re both sitting up now, with Clarke still straddling Lexa’s lap, and her hands move behind Lexa’s neck to anchor herself. Lexa’s hands continue to move upwards, under Clarke’s shirt. She leans back a bit, removing her lips from Clarke’s neck, causing Clarke to look down at her. Both of their eyes are significantly darker, and their breaths are coming in short and choppy. 

“Is this okay?” Lexa asks, as her hands wander up closer to the set of full breasts that are practically right in her face. Her voice is so low, and raspy that she almost doesn’t recognize it herself. There is an uncomfortable wetness that’s formed in between her legs, and it’s then that she realizes how fucking long it’s been since something like this has happened. “May I?” She asks softly, not wanting to do anything that Clarke doesn’t want to do.

All that Clarke can do is nod, and then she feels Lexa’s two hands taking both of her breasts in her hands above the material of her bra. Clarke moans when Lexa’s mouth returns to her neck and works its way up to her jaw, as Lexa kneads her chest with both hands. “Lexa.” She moans out again, and this time it’s a little louder and breathier. Clarke’s body starts to take over, as she starts to grind down on top of Lexa, doing anything that she can to find the friction that she’s seeking.

It’s when Lexa goes to try and remove Clarke’s shirt, and she’s got it stuck over Clarke’s head and they’re both giggling that, that they hear the basement door open. “Shit.” Lexa groans, helping Clarke pull her shirt back down quickly, and the blonde slips off of her lap. The both hurriedly tend to their messed up hair, and the rest of their clothes when they see Raven come into view.

She gives them both knowing looks. “Did I just interrupt something?” Raven smirks, and Lexa flips her off without Clarke seeing. “I mean, you two weren’t, you know, banging on my couch were you?”

“Raven!” Lexa groans and throws both hands over her face.

“This is my couch.” Clarke argues, and then realizes that she probably just confirmed what Raven was saying. “And no, we were most certainly not banging.”

Raven hums, trying to hold back her grin. It makes it even more funny that Lexa is so flustered over the situation. “Well, I was just coming down here to tell you both that dinner is ready.” She utters. “That is… if you haven’t already eaten.”

“Raven!” Lexa yells again, this time chasing after her friend until she runs upstairs. Once Raven is gone, Lexa spins around to find that Clarke is right behind her. “Clarke, I am so sorry about her – I just – I”

“Lexa.” Clarke chuckles and throws her arms around Lexa’s neck, bringing her in closer. “Babe, it’s okay. I don’t know what I was thinking. I mean, I do have several people staying here. There was definitely a chance of someone walking in.” Lexa smirks at Clarke and the blonde raises an eyebrow in question. “What is it?”

“You called me ‘babe’.” Lexa grins, and Clarke rolls her eyes teasingly. “It’s okay. I kind of liked it.” She murmurs before leaning in and kissing Clarke again.

“Just ‘kind of’?”

“Okay, I really, really fucking liked it.” 

“Better.” Clarke smirks before giving Lexa one last peck on the lips. “It’s probably for the best, though.” She says honestly. “Maybe that’s a hint for us to slow things down a bit. I mean, it’s been so long since we’ve both – you know?” And Lexa nods slowly. “We should just take our time.”

“You’re right.” Lexa replies. “I’m sorry – I shouldn’t have pushed you to –“

“Lexa, you didn’t push me to do anything.” Clarke interrupts. “I wanted it too.”

“Yeah?”

“Of course.” Clarke smiles. “I want you.” She admits, moving to kiss Lexa’s lips and down her jaw, causing Lexa to groan out in frustration. Clarke smiles into her skin just under her ear. “Soon, babe.” She whispers, her breath brushing across Lexa’s ear, before she nips at the lobe with her teeth, and just like that, she’s gone and headed back up the stairs, leaving an even more frustrated Lexa standing in the dark basement. 

“Fuck.”

 

//

 

After dinner, Lexa volunteered to clean up the dishes and the kitchen since Raven had made the food in the first place. Everyone thanked Raven before she made her way downstairs for the night. Octavia sat in the kitchen on her laptop, working on something for work, and Clarke took Finn to help him get ready for bed.

Sitting next to Clarke during their meal, and not being able to touch her in any way was a very difficult situation to be in. Lexa had told Raven about them, and she’s pretty sure that Clarke has said something to Octavia, but that still leaves Finn. She wonders what he will actually think of everything. He has shown that he's ‘Team Clexa’, but Lexa wonders if actually seeing her with his mother would change his mind. He’s only five, and he never knew his father, so his mother dating someone and kissing them, would have to be weird, right? 

Once she’s finished cleaning up, she puts her hands on the counter and leans over, closing her eyes and thinking about everything that’s been happening. She doesn’t know how long she stands there, but after a while, warm arms wrapping around her, startles her from her thoughts. “Whatcha thinking about?” Clarke asks, her words muffled because her lips are pressed between Lexa’s covered shoulder blades.

“Just thinking about Finn.” Lexa replies, taking a deep breath. “And if he’ll be okay with – uh, me and you. Umm… us?” She turns around in Clarke’s arms to face her, her hands still propped up behind her on the counter top, and Clarke’s arms move around Lexa’s shoulders. “Whatever this is.” Lexa adds, using a hand to gesture between the two of them. 

Clarke cocks her head to the side, as if she’s trying to think about what Lexa just said. And she’s right… whatever they are, they haven’t labeled it. What would you label it? Clarke thinks that asking Lexa to be her girlfriend might come off as a little bit juvenile, and the whole situation is different, because Lexa lives with her. “What do you want it to be?”

Lexa shrugs, because she can’t speak. Her mind is going a mile a minute, and she’s not sure as to what Clarke wants her to say. “I don’t know.” Clarke’s face searches over Lexa’s, trying to find any sort of hint or emotion as to what Lexa is thinking, but she fails. Lexa’s expression is as stoic as ever, and Clarke finds that extremely frustrating.

“I mean,” Clarke starts, moving her arms from around Lexa’s neck and dropping them to her own sides. “What – do you not want this?” She asks, using Lexa’s earlier technique and gesturing between herself and Lexa, and that’s when Lexa realizes that she might have said the wrong thing when she said that she ‘didn’t know’. Because of course she wants this with Clarke, and as scary as it sounds, in her mind, Lexa wants everything with Clarke.

Lexa notices Clarke taking a small step backwards, away from her, and she thinks that she actually felt her heart crack in that moment. “Wha – of course I want this, Clarke.” Lexa says assuredly, but quietly enough that Octavia, in the living room, can’t hear her. Lexa takes a step towards Clarke and grabs her hand, pulling her closer to her body. Clarke doesn’t seem convinced. “I don’t know what this is, but it doesn’t mean that I don’t want it. That I don’t want you… because I do.”

“I’m – it’s just, I feel like maybe – I don’t know… maybe you just think that you want to be with me.” Clarke says, and Lexa scrunches her eyebrows down at the blonde in front of her. “You’ve been – away for so long, and I’m just the first mildly attractive girl that you ran into.” Clarke chuckles sarcastically, looking down at her feet, clearly embarrassed by the entire situation. “You may just think that you want this with me, but what if one morning you wake up and decide that you don’t really like me like that or something – I don’t know.” Clarke shuts up, because she knows that she’s rambling, and she feels like the biggest idiot in the world at the moment.

“Clarke.” Lexa says gently, stepping closer and pulling the other woman’s hand up to her chest, right above where her heart rests. “You feel that?” Clarke nods slowly, and Lexa sees the beginnings of tears forming in her cerulean eyes. “That’s my heartbeat every time that I’m near you.” She says, knowing that Clarke is feeling how quickly it’s beating, under her hand. This time, Lexa laughs because she feels like a huge sap at the time. She keeps Clarke’s hand pressed to her chest and she leans in to kiss the blonde softly.

Clarke immediately feels Lexa’s heartrate quicken even more as her lips move over her own, and just as soon as the kiss had started, it ends with Lexa pulling back. Their foreheads stay pressed together, and Lexa takes a steadying breath. “And I’m guessing that you feel that?” Lexa says, knowing how hard her heart is pounding inside her chest.

Clarke grins and nods, and a couple of tears fall down her face. “You should probably get that seen about.” She teases, and Lexa chuckles before leaning in and pressing another kiss to the full, plump lips in front of her.

“Do you believe me, though?” Lexa asks, pulling back from their kiss. “I’ve never wanted anything like I want you, Clarke Griffin.”

Clarke smiles softly. “I believe you. I’m sorry that I questioned it.”

“Don’t apologize. Just know that –“

“Lexa!” Finn exclaims, interrupting their conversation and running into the kitchen. Lexa and Clarke quickly jump apart, and Lexa laughs at how excited Finn seems about something. 

“What’s up, bud?” She asks, kneeling down so that she’s eye level with the boy. 

“Will you tuck me in tonight?” He asks sweetly, and Lexa feels more of that warmth seeping into her heart, that’s already so full, she doesn’t know how much more it can take.

“Of course I will, Finn.” She answers with a smile and looks up at Clarke, who’s grinning down at the pair. “Let’s go.” Lexa grabs him and slings him over her shoulder, throwing Finn into a fit of giggles as she runs through the house to drop him on his bed. Clarke smiles to herself, and her fingers come up to graze over her lips, and her eyes close at everything that Lexa had just said to her. Lexa wants her. She wants Clarke. And Clarke wants Lexa.

After a couple of minutes, she makes her way down the hallway to her bedroom, but sticks her head into Finn’s room to tell him goodnight, and that’s when she overhears a conversation between he and Lexa. Clarke stops just outside of the door frame, where she can’t be seen. “Have you told my mom how much you like her yet?” Clarke hears Finn ask, followed by a chuckle from Lexa.

“I have told her.” Lexa nods. 

“And?”

“And what?” Lexa laughs at the boy’s antics. He’s been hanging around Raven too much. 

“Did she tell you how much she liked you?”

“She did.”

“And did you finally kiss?” Kids and their questions. Damn it.

“Uh – well,” Lexa stutters, not knowing what Clarke would want her to say in the situation. She figures that Clarke will want to have this conversation with Finn herself, so Lexa tries to steer away from it. “I think that you should probably talk to your mom about that, buddy.” She says, tucking him in good, one last time, and standing up from where she was sitting on the side of his bed. “Goodnight, Finn. Sleep well. If you need anything, come get me or your mom.”

Lexa starts to walk out of the bedroom, but is stopped by something that almost stops her heart. “Night, Lex. I love you.” Finn’s small, sweet voice calls out, and Lexa looks over her shoulder at him. He’s already burrowing his face into his duvet, and closing his eyes.

“Love you too.” She says quietly, and the three words sound weird and foreign to her. No one has told her that they loved her since her parents, and she hasn’t said the words to anyone other than her parents. She thinks that she may actually break down and sob right here. Right here in the floor of a five-year-old’s bedroom, but she holds them back, and makes her way out of the bedroom. Little did she know, that Clarke had just left the hallway to head down towards their bedroom, but the blonde had heard everything that transpired.

When Lexa walks into their bedroom, the lights are all off except for the lamp on Clarke’s side of the bed. She notices that Clarke has put up all of the blankets and pillows that were in the floor, once, for Lexa’s makeshift bed. Lexa takes that as the sign that Clarke wants her to continue sleeping in her bed with her, and Lexa’s not one to complain. Lexa grins at Clarke, who is already lying on the bed, above the comforter, before she walks into the bathroom to change into her pajamas.

It only takes her a minute before she’s out and piling into bed. She leans over and presses a kiss to Clarke’s exposed shoulder. The blonde is wearing a blue tank top, and a pair of sleep shorts, because the weather has been slightly warmer today than usual. Clarke sets down her phone, that she was looking at, and spins to get on top of Lexa, surprising the brunette when she does so. Once again, she’s found herself straddling this gorgeous woman, and she can’t wipe the smile from her face. She’s glad that she was able to get her tears under control after hearing Finn tell Lexa that he loved her. She’s never heard her son tell anyone, other than her, that. Not even Octavia. She can’t believe that this is her life. Only a few short weeks ago, she was just going through her life day by day, in the same routine, doing the same damn thing all of the time. She was miserable, except for her son. He had been the only real light in her life. Until now.

Clarke leans down to bring her lips to Lexa’s, and she smiles into, and so does Lexa. They are both, right now, filled to the brim with happiness and something else that they are both too afraid to say. Lexa sits up, her hands moving to the small of Clarke’s back, and she leans in to start kissing across the blonde’s collarbone. Clarke closes her eyes at the feeling of Lexa’s lips and tongue moving so gracefully across her skin, but the feeling is gone too soon, and Clarke opens her eyes to see that Lexa is staring at her with a look of something akin to… love. “God.” Lexa breathes out quietly. “You’re so fucking beautiful.” Clarke is sure that her face just turned about fifty shades of red at Lexa’s words. And not just the words, but the way that Lexa had spoken them. Clarke believed her when she said them.

“You’re not so bad yourself, babe.” Clarke says with a grin and Lexa gives her another peck on the lips before she’s pulling Clarke down on top of her. They’re lying flat on top of each other, with Clarke’s head lying on Lexa’s chest, as she listens to the quickened beats of the brunette’s heart. After a while, in the silence of the bedroom, both of their breathing seems to even out, and Lexa’s heart rate returns to that of a normal human being, and that’s how they fall asleep. Just two souls, mending into one.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> What did you think? Let me know in the comments below and feel free to leave kudos. ;)
> 
> There will be more angst coming up at some point... I just can't help but right fluff, damn it! :)
> 
> Love you all!
> 
> Follow me on Twitter @asuzh90


	12. Betting On You

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey, guys! I hope that everyone is doing well. Sorry that my updates are coming slower now, but I've been trying to alternate updating this fic and my other one, 'My Best Friend's Wedding', and I've had a major case of writer's block the past few days. I hope that you can all forgive me and that you enjoy this chapter.

Like all nights that she spends by Clarke’s side, Lexa sleeps soundlessly. There’s just something about Clarke that makes a wave of calmness wash over her, and it’s like nothing that she’s ever felt before. Sometime, during the night, Clarke had slid off of the top of Lexa, and cuddled into her side. Clarke has an arm draped across Lexa’s stomach, with her hand clinging to the material of Lexa’s shirt. 

Lexa lies there for a moment, listening to the steady breaths that are coming from the sleeping blonde beside her. It’s soothing and almost hypnotic, the way that Clarke’s breaths come out. After another minute or two, of staring, Lexa tries to wiggle herself out from Clarke’s grasp without waking her. She really needs to run to the bathroom and possibly brush her teeth. 

Once she’s out of the other woman’s hold, she walks quietly over to Clarke’s bathroom and shuts the door softly. After using the restroom, Lexa makes her way to the sink and looks at her face in the mirror. She had forgotten to remove her eye make-up the previous night, and now, she’s thankful that she did wake up before Clarke. Lexa immediately sets to scrubbing her face with a bit of warm water and soap. She then moves to brushing her teeth, and groans when she feels Clarke’s cinnamon toothpaste start to burn. She’s never really liked cinnamon, so she makes a mental note to send Raven to buy her some more. Perhaps   
wintergreen.

After her perfectly, white teeth are scrubbed clean, Lexa slowly makes her way back out into the bedroom. The lights are still off, so that means that Clarke has still to wake up. Lexa smiles at the way that Clarke has subconsciously moved over to her side of the bed and stuck her face into Lexa’s pillow. She does the best that she can, and slides back onto the bed, lifting Clarke’s arm up as she goes. Once she’s lying down, she turns so that she’s facing Clarke. She wants to see what those mesmerizing, blue eyes look like when they first open. She wants to watch all of the little yawns and stretches that Clarke will, more than likely, do when she first wakes. Lexa really hopes that she doesn’t seem like a major creeper, but she can’t help but to watch Clarke. She wants to know everything about her. Every little detail that makes her so irrefutably her.

It doesn’t take long until the blonde, in front of her, starts to shift every occasionally, signaling that she’s not far from waking fully. Lexa attempts to back her head away, because she realizes just how close she is to Clarke. She doesn’t want to freak her out, but there’s not much place for Lexa to go. Another thirty seconds or so pass, and Clarke’s eyelids begin to flutter open. She blinks multiple times, as her eyes try to adjust to the small amount of light that fills the room. The first thing that she sees, is a magnificent sight. Lexa, in all of her glory, is right in front of her. Her green eyes boring into Clarke’s own. The smile on the brunette’s face is as equally exquisite, and Clarke is quick to return it. Her own smile is smaller and sleepier, but a smile nonetheless, and Lexa thinks that Clarke’s morning smile is quite possibly the most captivating thing that she’s ever witnessed.

“Morning.” Clarke’s voice is lower than usual, and a little huskier, and Lexa feels it all the way in her bones. 

Lexa smiles again, moving a soft hand up to push some stray, blonde strands from Clarke’s eyes. Clarke’s eyes flicker closed, at the feel of Lexa’s fingers on her face, but only for a split second before she’s opening them again. “Good morning.” Lexa grins beautifully. They stare at each other for far too long, but neither of them seems to care much about that. They lie there, taking each other in, and enjoying every second of it. The outside world and all of Lexa’s problems seem to fly away in that moment. Her burdens don’t exist. Not when she’s with Clarke. “You know how, last night, I told you how beautiful that I thought you were?”   
Lexa asks with a small grin, and Clarke nods slowly, with a smile of her own, remembering the way that Lexa had looked at her in that moment. “Well, I didn’t think that it was possible for someone to get even more stunning, but,” She leans over to press a quick kiss to Clarke’s forehead, and then pulls back. “I stand corrected.” Queue signature, sexy smirk.

Clarke knows, for sure, that she’s blushing, but she can’t bring herself to care. She, honestly, doesn’t know how to respond to that, because no one has ever spoken to her like this. So, Clarke does the only thing that she can think of, the only thing that she wants to do right now… She leans in, until their noses brush against each other, and Lexa’s eyes flutter closed as she waits for Clarke to close the distance between them, but that never comes. Lexa hears Clarke groan. “Shit.” The blonde says, and Lexa feels the bed dip, and when she opens her eyes, Clarke is running across the room to the bathroom. “Be right back!” Clarke calls frantically, causing Lexa to chuckle.

A couple of minutes later, Clarke comes waltzing back into the bedroom with a big, dopey grin on her face, and Lexa realizes that she may never get used to Clarke’s smile. Lexa is still lying flat on her back, on top of the blankets, and Clarke jumps into the bed like a six-year-old, before rolling over on top of Lexa and straddling her. “You have a thing for this position, don’t you?” Lexa laughs out, bringing her hands to Clarke’s thighs, her fingers smoothing over the pale skin just under the hem of the blonde’s shorts.

Clarke hums, leaning over until her lips ghost over Lexa’s. “That,” She whispers softly. “And a few others.” Now, Lexa’s not one to blush, but that definitely made her face turn a shade of pink, causing Clarke to chuckle and finally break the distance between them. Lexa loves this feeling, that she’s grown accustomed to over the past couple of days. Her heart swells every time that she feels Clarke smile into their kisses, and she can’t help but smile back. The first kiss doesn’t last too long, with Lexa pulling back a little bit and looking up into blue. 

“You brushed your teeth?” Lexa smiles. She figured out that that where Clarke had run off to when she woke up.

“I did.” Clarke smiles widely. “But you did, too. So, you can’t make fun of me.”

Lexa grins again. She feels like she’s been doing that way too much lately, but she can’t help it, and she can’t find it in herself to care. She reaches up, to place a gentle hand behind Clarke’s neck, and pulls Clarke back down to her, crashing their lips together. This kiss isn’t as timid as their first one, from just a moment ago. This one is deeper and full of tongue and teeth and Lexa feels her skin start to tingle throughout her body. This woman is going to be the death of her.

Clarke nips lightly at Lexa’s bottom lip, eliciting a moan from the brunette that sends a shiver down Clarke’s spine. It’s been so long since she’s kissed someone like this, much less had sex with them, and even though she told Lexa that she wanted to take this whole thing slow, she couldn’t help but want to go back on her word. 

Clarke moves her hands to Lexa’s tight stomach, pushing her fingers up in under Lexa’s shirt to rub at the skin there. Her lips move from the brunette’s lips down the side of her jaw, and she feels Lexa’s long, slender fingers move further into the legs of her shorts. Clarke doesn’t realize it, but she must flinch or tighten her muscles because Lexa immediately pulls her hands back, and moves her head out of the reach of   
Clarke’s lips. “I’m uh, I’m – sorry.” Lexa rushes out, and Clarke raises an eyebrow in confusion. “I shouldn’t have – I just – sorry. I know you wanted to go slow. I’m sorry for, you know –“ She gestures with her hands towards Clarke’s thighs.

Clarke chuckles as Lexa continues to fumble over her words, and the blush on her face continues to creep lower. “Lex,” Clarke grins, leaning down to place another kiss to Lexa’s lips. “It’s fine.” The blonde leans forward and moves her lips back down Lexa’s jaw, up to her tiny, adorable ear. “I liked it.” She whispers in a low, sultry voice, before nipping at Lexa’s earlobe. Clarke feels Lexa’s body, under her, tense up, but only for a split second before Clarke is letting out a squeal when Lexa suddenly flips them.

Clarke looks up into green eyes, that seem to be darker than they were a moment ago. She notices their position now, and she is more than okay with it, because having Lexa look at her like she hung the moon and the stars is quite possibly the best feeling in the entire world. Lexa, with a leg on each side of one of Clarke’s thighs, leans down and places a chaste kiss to the blonde’s lips. “I know that I’ve said this already, this morning, but,” Lexa kisses across Clarke’s jawline and then under her jawline, near her pulse point, and Clarke is more than happy to lean back and allow Lexa the room that she’s asking for. “You’re so beautiful.” A kiss to Clarke’s lips. “Gorgeous.” To her cheek. “Stunning.” Clarke’s nose, causing the blonde to giggle. “Breathtaking.” Back to Clarke’s lips. “And very,” Kiss. “Very fucking sexy.” Lexa, all but, whispers as she grazes her lips down the middle of Clarke’s neck, down to her collarbone.

Lexa is sure that she hears Clarke whimper, and it’s, by far one of the sexiest things that she’s ever heard. Her hands move up under the material of Clarke’s shirt, and her fingers skim over Clarke’s stomach, tickling her there without really knowing. Clarke chuckles a bit, and looks up into green eyes to see that Lexa is looking at her with a small smirk on her face. “Is something funny, Miss Griffin?”

“Not at all.” She replies sassily, but then decides to be a little bit bolder, even though she’s breaking one of her rules. It’s a stupid rule, really. She should never had said anything. She reaches forward, and grabs Lexa’s hands, her ocean blue eyes never leaving Lexa’s emerald green ones. Clarke pulls Lexa’s hands further up, under her shirt, until they stop on her ribs, right under her breasts.

Clarke would laugh at Lexa’s face, right now, if she weren’t so turned out by the feeling of Lexa’s hands so close to her. She wants Lexa to touch her. Needs her to, like she’s never needed anything else. “Ar – are you sure?” Lexa mutters, and Clarke leans up to kiss her, her hands wrapping around Lexa’s face in a tender way.

“Touch me.” Clarke breathes, as she pulls back from their kiss, but only for a second before she closing the short distance between them again, and Lexa doesn’t have to be told twice. Her hands move, on their own accord, up the small distance, where she finally has Clarke in her hands. Her breasts are so, so soft, and they fit into Lexa’s grip perfectly. Both women gasp into their kiss at the final contact. Lexa kneads the supple mounds of flesh, gently at first, but when she feels Clarke’s hands grip tightly to her shoulders, she feels confident that Clarke does, in fact, want this, so she tightens her grip, eliciting a soft moan from Clarke’s mouth. 

Lexa moves her lips down the side of Clarke’s neck, while her fingers begin to skillfully roll and pinch at two pebbled nipples. She can’t believe that this is happening. It’s been something that, admittedly, she’s dreamed about the past couple of weeks, and Clarke feels so much better than she could have ever imagined. It’s like her breasts were made for Lexa’s hands only. For her touch. “Lexa.” Clarke whimpers as Lexa’s skillful tongue makes its way down the middle of her neck and down to her collarbone, where she will, more than likely, have a few good marks to remember this morning by.

When Lexa begins to move lower, she realizes that Clarke still has her shirt on, and she actually growls. Clarke laughs, because she knows exactly what Lexa wants, and she knows the feeling. Lexa moves her hands out, from under, Clarke’s sleep shirt to the hem, and tugs. “Off.” She groans, and it’s a bit muffled because she can’t seem to pull her lips away from Clarke’s skin, but the blonde definitely hears. She removes her hands from Lexa’s shoulders and holds her arms over her head, and looks down at Lexa with a sexy raised brow. Lexa grins one of the most adorable grins that Clarke’s ever seen. Like she just told a five-year-old that they could have ice cream before supper. Lexa wastes no time in pulling Clarke’s sleep shirt over her head, and the sight that is revealed, truly makes her mouth water. Her hands move back to Clarke’s chest, and begin to knead again, as her gaze drags over them. She was right. They are perfect for her.

Lexa kisses at Clarke’s collarbone again, before, slowly, descending. Clarke’s chest is rising and falling with her deep, quickened breaths, and Lexa looks up to meet her blue eyes, that are dark, and filled with want. “Is this okay?” Clarke bites her bottom lip, and nods, and she immediately feels Lexa’s lips on her breasts. Licking and sucking at the flesh there, before taking a, embarrassingly stiff, nipple between her lips.   
Clarke bucks further into Lexa’s mouth, and suddenly, she remembers their position. She, not so subtlety, starts to grind down onto Lexa’s thigh that’s between her own legs. Clarke lets out loud moan, and Lexa flicks her eyes up, without taking her lips from Clarke’s nipple, to signal Clarke that she better be quiet, and Clarke continues to grind down onto Lexa’s thigh. “Fuck, Clarke.” Lexa gasps, after finally popping her lips off of one nipple before moving to the other. She doesn’t want the other to feel neglected. That would be too cruel. She removes her hands from Clarke’s chest completely, and they immediately find their way to Clarke’s ass. She pulls her in closer, driving Clarke’s center into her thigh even more. Clarke throws her head back at the feeling, and Lexa doesn’t think that she’s ever been so turned on in her life. She can feel her own wetness start to become uncomfortable in her sleep shorts. 

“Shit, baby.” Lexa huffs, her lips making their way back up Clarke’s throat to her pulse point where she sucks and nips until Clarke is a whimpering mess. The term of endearment doesn’t go unnoticed by Clarke, but she’s too lost in this moment to say anything. “You drive me crazy, you know that?” Lexa asks as her mouth makes it up to Clarke’s ear. “The best kind of crazy.” She whispers, and Clarke brings her hands to Lexa’s face, pulling her until their lips crash together once more. It’s a dance of lips and tongues, and they both get caught up in it, until they hear a knock on the door.

“Mommy.” A small voice says from the other side, and Clarke is thanking whatever god is up in the sky, for teaching her son to knock before entering.

“Shit.” Clarke says, as the two women jump up and Clarke runs straight for the bathroom, but not before placing one last kiss to Lexa’s lips. When the door is closed to the bathroom, Lexa gets up and straightens out her clothes and hair as best as she can. She makes her way to the door and opens it to see Finn holding his small teddy bear, and he’s not wearing his usual smile.

Lexa immediately kneels down. “Finn, what’s wrong? Is everything okay?” She asks, genuinely worried about him, because she doesn’t think that she’s ever seen him without a smile. A single tear leaves his eye and Lexa immediately has him in her arms, lifting him up and holding on tight. 

“I don’t feel good, Lex.” He says softly and lays his head over onto Lexa’s shoulder, and that’s when she notices how flushed he is. She brings her hand up to his forehead, and he’s burning up. She takes him over to the bed, trying to ignore what just happened there, and Clarke comes out of the bathroom with her hair pulled back and a new shirt on.

“What is it?” She asks, running up to Lexa, and bringing her hand gently to Finn’s face. “Baby, are you okay?”

“He has a fever.” Lexa says softly. “Says he doesn’t feel good. Does your throat hurt, buddy?” She asks, because when he speaks, his voice is lower and scratchier. He nods his head in answer and Lexa lays him down on the bed. Clarke piles in the bed behind Finn, coming up behind him and cuddling him, placing kisses all over the back of his head.

“It’s okay, baby.” Clarke whispers into his ear. “I think you have a cold. We can fix it, okay?” He just nods his head again, and Lexa kneels down beside the bed to look at him. She moves her hand through his mop of hair gently, and then down the side of his face. Clarke watches the whole thing in awe, and she didn’t think that her heart could swell anymore, but of course Lexa manages to make it do so.

“I’m going to go make you some soup.” Lexa says softly, looking at Finn, even though his eyes are half closed in sleep. “Does that sound good to you, buddy?” He nods, and Lexa can tell that he is already pretty much asleep. She stands and starts to turn away, but a gentle hand on her wrist, stops her. It’s Clarke, and Lexa moves a little bit closer, leaning over a very tired and sick Finn. Clarke lifts her head enough to bring their lips together in a soft kiss, and Clarke mouths ‘thank you’. Lexa smiles at her and nods, before making her way out of the room and down towards the kitchen. 

 

//

 

When Lexa enters the kitchen and living room area, she notices that Octavia and Raven are already in there, cooking something in a skillet and brewing coffee. “Morning, Sunshine.” Raven says, grinning when she turns around to see Lexa walk into the room. 

“Morning, guys.” Lexa nods towards Octavia, and the shorter woman just smiles. Lexa moves over towards the cupboards, and begins to dig around for some chicken broth and a few other ingredients that she will need for Finn’s soup. She realizes that it’s very quiet in the kitchen, while her back is turned towards the other two women, but she doesn’t really think anything about it. She just thought that they were too busy to continue talking or something, but when she turns around, she sees that Octavia and Raven are both staring at her with knowing eyes and smirks on their faces. “What?” Lexa asks, raising an eyebrow in question. She has her arms full of ingredients and she turns towards the stovetop to pour them all into a pot. The eye is still hot from whatever Raven was just cooking in that skillet.

“Oh, nothing.” Raven practically sing-songs, and Octavia chuckles into her mug of coffee.

“Cut the crap, Reyes.” Lexa groans, as she opens the box of chicken broth. “Either tell me what you two are grinning about, or stop staring at me.”

“Someone’s grumpy this morning.” Octavia says, eyeballing Lexa over her cup.

Lexa rolls her eyes, and grabs a spoon to stir with. “I’m not grumpy.” She replies, stirring with one hand and using her other to slowly pour in the rest of the ingredients. She hopes that Finn likes this, but from what she has seen of his eating habits, so far, he’s not that picky for a five-year-old. “Finn’s sick. I’m trying to hurry up and make him some soup.”

That perks Octavia up. “He’s sick? Where is he? Is he okay?”

“He’ll be fine.” Lexa answers, setting the spoon down and turning to face the other two women while the pot begins to boil. “He has a pretty bad fever, and his throat is bothering him, but I think once he has some soup and continues to rest, he should feel better after while. He’s with Clarke in her room.”

“Don’t you mean ‘your’ room?” Raven teases, wiggling an eyebrow at her best friend, and Lexa throws a glare Raven’s way. “What? Don’t think that me and Miss Blake, here, didn’t hear the noises coming from ‘your’ room earlier.” Octavia and Raven both burst into a fit of laughter when Lexa immediately turns a bright shade of red. Lexa, seriously, hates Raven. 

“Why are we friends again?”

“Hey!” Raven exclaims. “Don’t hate. I’m proud of you, Woods. From the way it sounded, you haven’t really lost your touch.”

“Oh my god.” Lexa is thankful that the stove eye was already hot, and that the quick soup that she made was almost finished heating through. She cannot stand to be in here for another minute. Of course, the first time that she and Clarke started to be intimate in anyway, they would be interrupted (not that she’s blaming Finn), and then both of their friends would hear them and harass them about it. Shit. Just her luck. She’s just thankful that Clarke isn’t in here, as well. That would have been even more embarrassing.

A few minutes have passed and Raven and Octavia haven’t really said much else, other than the occasional giggle or snort. Lexa knows that they are still talking about her behind her back, but she can’t bring herself to care right now. She ladles some of the soup into a small bowl, and then grabs a pack of crackers and a bottle of water before heading back towards Clarke’s bedroom. “Don’t do anything I wouldn’t do.” Raven calls, and Lexa, without turning back, flips her the bird.

 

//

 

When Lexa enters the bedroom, her arms full, she smiles when she sees Clarke still curled up behind her son, fingers slowly running through his long brown hair. She feels her heartrate increase, and the organ starts to pound against the inside of her chest. It’s rhythm, she can feel throughout her entire body. She can hear it in her ears, and feel it in her toes. 

Clarke looks to be half asleep, too, but Lexa quietly makes her way over to the bed, and sets everything down onto the nightstand. The blonde woman finally notices Lexa then, and gives her a beautiful, sleepy smile. “Hi.” She whispers, making Lexa’s heart beat even faster.

“Hey.” She replies, equally as soft, and then motions to the soup on the nightstand. Clarke nods, and then leans up on her elbow to look down at her son. 

“Finn.” She says calmly, still running her fingers through his hair. “Hey, baby, wake up.” When his eyes slowly flicker open, a hint of a smile forms on his face when he sees his mother looking down at him. “I know you’re sleepy, baby, but Lexa made you some soup. You think that you could eat some of that right now?” When he nods his head, Clarke helps him sit up and prop his back against the headboard. Lexa sits on the edge of the bed and grabs the bowl and a small dishrag that she grabbed in the kitchen. She lays the dishrag over his chest, just in case the soup spills, and dips a small spoonful out. She blows on it a little bit, making sure that it won’t burn him, and then offers him a bite.

Finn takes the bite that Lexa offers him, and he swallows it quickly. Lexa notices him flinch his face a small bit, and wonders if he doesn’t like it. “Is it not good, buddy? I can make something else if you don’t like it.”

“It’s good.” He replies quietly, and does his best attempt at a smile. Clarke smooths his bangs out of his eyes, and rubs his warm forehead. “My throat just hurts.”

“I understand.” Lexa smiles. “Want to try some more? It might start to help your throat, eventually.”

“Yes, please.” He answers, and Lexa is happy to continue feeding him. She would offer him some crackers, but she knows that he won’t be able to eat them right now. 

“I can do that, Lex.” Clarke says softly, pulling Lexa out of her own head. “Here.” She says, gesturing towards the bowl and spoon. “You can go shower while I feed him.”

“Are you sure?” Lexa asks, handing the bowl over to Clarke across Finn’s body. 

“Yes,” Clarke smiles. “Thank you for this.”

“Yeah.” Finn chimes in. “Thanks, Lex.” And between the meekness of his voice, and the short nickname that he has started calling her, she doesn’t think that her heart can handle much more of this. She grins, and leans down to place a kiss to the top of his head. 

“You’re very welcome.” She says, getting up and winking at Clarke before grabbing some clothes and heading into the bathroom.

“So, you like Lexa’s soup pretty good?” Clarke asks Finn, as she feeds him another spoonful, once Lexa is in the bathroom. Finn hums and nods his head with a small smile. “Good. That was really sweet of her, wasn’t it?”

“It was.” He replies when he’s able to. “Lexa’s the best.” He says, and notices the teasing look that his mom throws him before he adds to it. “And you too, mommy.” Clarke laughs at him, and leans over to place a kiss to his head.

“She is the best, isn’t she?” Clarke says, mostly to herself, but Finn hears his mother and smiles.

“Do you like her?” He asks, taking Clarke aback. She knows that he’s had a couple of conversations with Lexa about this, but he hasn’t really said anything to her, at least until now, and she has to admit that she does find it a bit awkward. Of course she likes Lexa. That’s obvious, right? Well, now that she thinks about it, they haven’t done anything in front of anyone. All of their touches and kisses happen when they’re alone, and mostly in their bedroom. She smiles to herself at how close they have gotten of the past couple of days, and what took place on this very bed just an hour ago. It sends a shiver throughout her body at the thought. “Mommy?” Finn says, breaking Clarke out of her thoughts, and she realizes that he is still waiting on her to answer his question.

“I do.” Clarke smiles, not afraid to admit it, because, even though he is five, Finn is smart enough to already know that she and Lexa are more than just friends. “I like her a lot.”

“Good.” He replies, and to her surprise, he doesn’t say anything else about it.

“Do you like her?” Clarke asks, but she already knows the answer to that, after hearing the conversation between her son and Lexa the previous night.

“Uh huh.” He smiles from ear to ear. “She’s so cool.” He thinks for a minute before adding something else. “Did you know that she told me that I was her best friend?”

“Really?”

“Uh huh.” He nods. “I’m glad. She’s my best friend too.”

“And what about me?” Clarke teases, but continues to feed her son the warm soup. 

“You’re my mom. You have to be my friend.” He grins, and by the way his voice is changing slightly, Clarke can already tell that the soup is having a positive effect on his throat. They both laugh together, and once Clarke has finished feeding Finn his soup and offering him a drink of water, he settles back down into the bed, and falls soundly back into sleep. She lies back down, as well, and curls up behind him, bringing her arms around his body to hold him tightly.

Clarke doesn’t know how much time has passed by, and she’s almost asleep when the bathroom door opens and Lexa steps out wearing a pair of grey joggers and a navy blue t-shirt. Her hair is still wet from her shower, and she’s using the towel, in her hand, to towel dry it. Lexa looks over to the bed and smiles when she sees Clarke watching her. Her eyes then flicker down to the sleeping boy in Clarke’s arms. “How is he?” Lexa asks. “Was the soup okay?”

“The soup was perfect.” Clarke replies quietly, so as not to wake her son up. “Thank you, again.” Lexa nods with a small, warm, loveable smile. “He is still warm, but I think the soup definitely helped his throat.”

“Good.” Lexa utters, taking the towel and throwing it into the hamper. The two of them stare at each other for far longer than a normal person should, until Lexa speaks again. “I’ll be out in the living room if you need anything. Just call me or text me, okay?”

“Don’t go.” Clarke whispers, looking down at Finn when he flinches slightly. He doesn’t wake and Clarke looks back to Lexa. “Stay with me?” She says. “Stay with us?” They both come out as questions, as if Clarke isn’t sure that Lexa would want to stay in her with the both of them.

Lexa smiles and flicks the lamp off before making her way over to the bed. She lies on Finn’s other side, facing Clarke, and taking in all that she is. She’s so beautiful, and that one though runs through Lexa’s mind at least a hundred times a day. They exchange several small smiles, and they watch each other intently for a while without any words having to pass between them. Lexa doesn’t care that it’s almost eleven in the morning. She would lay here all day, if it meant that she was with Clarke and Finn. Clarks sticks one hand above Finn’s head, and lays it on the pillow there. Lexa sees and moves her own to the same place, intertwining their fingers, and using her thumb to caress small circles into the top of Clarke’s hand.

After another moment of watching each other, and both of them falling for each other even more every second, Clarke props herself up on her elbow and whispers. “Come here.” Lexa doesn’t hesitate and she leans up, as well, holding her body above Finn’s as she looks at Clarke. The blonde moves closer and closer, before finally bringing their lips together. The kiss is soft, sweet, and short, but it’s full of emotion and feelings as if Clarke is trying to tell Lexa something that she can’t quite put into words. Before it can get out of hand, Clarke pulls back, brushing her nose against Lexa’s and smiling, because Lexa’s eyes are still closed and her lips are parted as if Clarke had sucked every last breath from her lungs. “You’re perfect.” Clarke whispers into the space between them before bringing her lips back to place a quick peck on Lexa’s. Clarke leans back and lies her head back down on the pillow behind Finn. Her heart is pounding, and now her throat is hurting. Not because she’s sick, but because she wasn’t quite able to get the words, that she really wanted to say, out.

Lexa leans back down, too, and rubs her thumb over Clarke’s hand again, where their hands are still entangled. They smile back and forth with each other for a couple of more minutes before they both doze off, and curl up beside the sleeping boy between them.

 

//

 

Lexa wakes to a soft buzzing sound behind her. She almost tries to ignore it, but it keeps buzzing and she finally turns to see that it’s her cell phone on the nightstand behind her. She furrows her brow wondering who in the hell is texting her. Only like two people have her number, so she reaches over to grab it and sees that she has two missed calls from Raven and a text from her. 

RAVEN (12:23PM) – Woods, get down to the lair. Now.

Lexa looks back over at Clarke to make sure that she hadn’t woken the other two up, and then she slowly slides out of bed, untangling her hand from Clarke’s and immediately missing the warmth. She slips on her tennis shoes on and quietly exits Clarke’s bedroom, making her way across the hallway to the basement door. She wonders what Raven could possibly want her in the basement for, because she never wants her down there.

Once she makes it down the stairs, Raven spins around on her rolling computer chair and faces her. “It’s about time.”

“Sorry. We were – “

“I don’t want to hear about your and Griffin’s sexscapades, Woods.” Raven interrupts.

“We weren’t. We were just sleeping, asshole. Finn is in there and he’s sick.”

“Okay.” Raven says turning to look back at her computer, and pointing a finger at a very familiar face on the screen. It’s Lexa’s aunt Nia, and the taller woman immediately walks over to stand in front of the screens.

“Is this live?” Lexa asks, her voice almost getting stuck somewhere deep in her throat. Her throat is dry all of a sudden, and her face begins to turn red with anger.

“Yep.” Raven answers, popping the ‘p’ in ‘yep’. “All stations are covering it.” She adds. “CNN, FOX, NBC, MSNBC, you name it.” And it’s then that Lexa sees what the banner, scrolling across the bottom of the screen, says.

CEO OF WOODS INC. SPEAKS ABOUT MISSING NIECE.

“Turn the volume up.” Lexa says between gritted teeth. Just the sound of Nia’s voice sends shivers down Lexa’s spine, and not the good kind.

“Miss Woods, Miss Woods!” A reporter exclaims, off camera, and Nia’s cold, blue eyes scan over the crowd to find whomever was talking to her. When her eyes land on him, she nods her head at him, telling him to continue speaking. “Is it true that you’re throwing all of your resources in to help locate your niece, Alexandria Woods?”

Lexa sees Nia’s jaw clench, on screen, and then she nods once more. “I am assisting in any way that I can to find Alexandria, yes.”

Another reporter. “Miss Woods, it’s been ten years since your brother’s untimely death. Is Woods Inc. still as prosperous and budding as it was when he had the reigns?”

“Alexei did such a marvelous job starting and running this company.” Cue Nia’s fake tears, and just the scene makes Lexa physically sick. This woman, someone who is supposed to be her family, is the cause of all of this. She is the reason that Lexa’s parents are dead and that she, herself, was thrown into prison for their murders. Now, Nia is not only lying through her teeth, but she’s pretending as if she’s emotional and devastated. 

Raven sees, out of the corner of her eye, that Lexa’s back has straightened and her fists are to her side, clenching tightly. She’s sure that her friend is going to have crescent shaped lacerations on the inside of her palms when this is all over. Raven hates that Lexa has to see this, but she knows that she has to.

“It – it still breaks my heart to think about my ama - amazing brother and his lovely wife.” Nia continues, allowing her voice to go a little higher pitched and to break and few times here and there. “However,” She says, clearing her throat, and standing up straighter at the podium she’s behind. “My company, Woods Inc., is thriving.” Nia’s voice is powerful as it rings through the speakers of the computer screen, and her fingers grasp, tightly, at the edge of the podium. “We are still, very much, in the pharmaceutical business. My team of doctors and scientists are the best in the world. Over the past few years, Woods Inc. has begun to integrate itself into the business of weaponry development. As I’m sure that you know, my brother started with medicine and slowly began to dip his toes into the world of technology. After his death, I dove in, and now, with the help of Cage Wallace at Mount Weather Corp., I am pleased to say that we are now partners in developing new technological weapons that is sure to advance the art of warfare.” The reporters go crazy, in the background, and Nia’s eyes scan across the crowd fervently, her face twisting and turning into an evil smirk that sends another chill through Lexa’s body.

“What?” Lexa snaps, and turns to look at Raven. “Weapons? She can’t be fucking serious! This is not what my parents strived for! This is not what Woods Inc. is about!”

“I know that, Lexa.” Raven’s voice is calm and calculating, and it doesn’t go unnoticed by Lexa that Raven actually used her first name for a change. “But, really, did you expect any different? It’s Nia. She’s evil. You already knew that. It’s not too big of a stretch that she would merge with the Wallaces at MWC. They’re almost as bad as she is.”

“This – this can’t be happening.” Lexa starts to cry. “This isn’t wh – what my father wanted.” Raven knows that Lexa will not want her to touch her, so she keeps her distance and looks back to the computer as the crowd settles and Lexa wipes the tears from her eyes, so that she can listen.

“Miss Woods.” Another reporter chimes in. “You say that you’re developing weapons, now, with MWC, but wasn’t that against everything that Woods Inc. originally stood for? Your brother started in medicine, and was a major benefactor and assistant to Doctors Without Borders. This is quite a turn.”

“My brother – “ Nia almost snaps, her teeth clench together and she starts to lean over the podium, more dangerously than before. She takes a deep breath before beginning again. “My brother was a good, hard-working man, but he didn’t have an eye for this business, so he stuck with what he knew. Technology, and specifically weaponry, are the new frontier, people. If you’re not onboard, then you’re nothing.”

A short, bald-headed man steps up to the side of the podium after Nia’s last answer, and speaks into the microphone. “I’m sorry, but we only have time for one more question for Miss Woods.” He steps back, and after a few moments, Nia points at another reporter off screen. 

“Nia,” Whoever that reporter is, clearly didn’t know how badly she hated being called her first name by people that she wasn’t close to. Nia’s face twisted into somewhat of a scowl, and she lowered her hands to her side. “Suppose that your niece, Alexandria, is watching. What is something that you would say to her, right now?”

Nia’s eyes shoot up, instantly, to look at the cameras, and Lexa feels as if her aunt’s eyes are boring into her, like she knows that Lexa is watching. Like she was hoping that she would be watching. “I just want to tell Alexandria… please, please give yourself up. There are fine people out looking for you every day, taking time away from their families so as to find you.” Lexa rolls her eyes. “I know how troubled you are, my dear, but please know that there are people, back in that prison, who can help you. I just want the best for you, Alex, and I want to know that you’re safe. Please, just, turn yourself in.” Nia continues to look into the camera for another moment or so, and Lexa is sure that she sees the beginnings of a small, evil smile start to form on her aunt’s face before she is being dragged off stage by the bald-headed man.

Raven is quick to shut the screen down, and she’s nervous to look over and see the reaction on Lexa’s face. When she turns, Lexa’s hands are still clenched down at her sides, and she’s rocking back and forth on the heels of her feet. Raven can also see that there are still tears falling from her best friend’s eyes, but they are most definitely not tears of sadness. No. They are tears of anger. Pure rage. Before Raven can get any words out, Lexa is spinning, and kicking the table behind her, knocking all of Raven’s empty beer bottles off. Glass shatters everywhere and Raven’s eyes go wide, but Lexa doesn’t seem to notice, nor care.

Lexa screams at nothing in particular. It’s not phrases or words, it’s just screaming, and it’s full of fury and distress both. She punches at the wall behind her, not thinking about the room that she’s in being a cement basement. She continues crying and screaming, and she clearly doesn’t care that the wall is made of concrete, because she continues to punch it, and Raven can see blood start to sprinkle the wall. “Lexa!” She exclaims, jumping from her seat and running over to her best friend. “Calm down, please, you have to calm down.” Raven tries to wrap her arms around her friend, bringing in for a hug, but she knows that it’s also to trap Lexa from hurting herself anymore.

“I – I can’t!” Lexa feels broken now. She’s been living in this fairytale world, and she had been stupid and forgotten what is actually going on out there in the real world. In her real life. “This – she can’t – she has to pay for what she did to them, Raven!” Lexa’s screams turn into sobs, and she pushes herself out of Raven’s grasp. “And now – now she’s turning their company into a joke! A dangerous, fucking joke!”

“I know, I know.” Raven utters calmly, trying to soothe her friend as best she can. Before all of this happened, all of those years ago, Lexa was not an emotional person at all. No one ever knew what was going on in her head. She never cried. She never yelled. She kept it all inside. So, seeing Lexa break down twice in the span of two or three days, well… that was different, and Raven had no idea what to do about it. Of course, Lexa had all of the right in the world to be upset and have any kind of breakdown that she wanted to, but it was just scary. Terrifying, to Raven, actually. “Shhh…” Raven shushes Lexa quietly, and tries to bring her arms around her friend once more, but Lexa pushes her back.

“Please, just, get away from me.” Lexa says softly, shaking her head and looking down at the black Converse on her feet. “I just – I need to be alone.” Raven steps back, because she can see that Lexa is still angry. Her friend’s face is red and flushed and her hand really needs to be tended to, but Raven knows that Lexa will not allow it right now, so she backs up further.

“Okay. I – I’ll be upstairs when you’re ready to talk.” Raven stutters, and turns to go up the stairs, but before she can make it up, she runs into someone. “Clarke – you shouldn’t – you don’t need to –“

“What is going on?” The blonde asks, out of breath. She was clearing running, trying to make her way down here to check out what all of the commotion was about. Clarke pushes past Raven and makes her way into the clearing in the basement. The first thing that she sees is a very small crack in the nearest cement wall, and blood spatters sprinkled across the area. “What the fu –“ Her eyes then land on the tall, brunette woman standing at the other end of the room, with her hands over her face, and blood dripping down her hand. “What happened?” Clarke asks quietly, turning to Raven and trying to ignore the sting in her chest from seeing Lexa like this. So broken.

“Woods Inc. press conference televised on all national media outlets.” Raven answers, keeping her voice down so that Lexa won’t scream at her for telling Clarke. “Nia was, of course, front woman and you can imagine how that went.”

“Oh my God.” Clarke breathes out, looking down at her feet for a split second and then over to where Lexa was standing. It seems that the other woman hadn’t even noticed that she was down there yet. Too lost in her own mind and thoughts to worry about the present and her surroundings. “Go.” Clarke whispers, nodding towards the staircase. “I need to – I can’t just let her –“

“You don’t need to be down here, Clarke.” Raven replies. “You don’t need to see all of this. She’s not – she’s not herself right now, okay? She just wants to be alone.”

“I need to see her, Raven. Please, just, go upstairs.” Raven watches Clarke for a few seconds, her face scrunched in though, although it looked painful. She eventually backs down, and turns to walk up the staircase, leaving Clarke alone in the basement with Lexa.

Clarke, slowly, makes her way over to Lexa. She doesn’t want to startle her, and cause any more damage to Lexa’s psych. The closer she gets, the worse off that she can tell Lexa is. The brunette’s face is red and streaked with tears. She’s mumbling something to herself and shaking her head. Something has cracked inside of her and Clarke’s heart aches for Lexa. She hates to see her like this. Someone so full of life, reduced to shambles because of something a bad person did to them ten years ago. Clarke knows that it has to be haunting to Lexa. She knows that that stinging feeling that Lexa carries around in her chest, will probably never go away, but the least that Clarke can do, is try to help take away some of that pain. “Lexa.” She says softly, coming up to stand in front of the brunette. “Lexa, hey.” She puts her hands around Lexa’s wrists and pulls the other woman’s hands away from her face, gently.

The intensity of Lexa’s green eyes is magnified times ten, by the glassy tears that fill her eyes. Clarke feels her own heart break a little more at the sight. “Clarke –“ Lexa whispers. “You – you should go.” She says, and Clarke shakes her head ‘no’. “You need to leave.” Lexa continues, and this time her voice is louder and a bit harsher. She pulls her hands from Clarke’s grip and turns to go lean her back against the nearest wall.

“I’m not leaving.” Clarke replies, and Lexa’s eyes shoot up to look at her and she groans before sliding down the wall and sitting on the cold, concrete floor in the corner. Lexa brings her knees up and leans over them, covering her face with her hands again. “Lexa, please tell –“

“No, Clarke!” Lexa yells, and startles the blonde, causing Clarke to take a few steps back. Lexa immediately feels bad for that. She knows that Clarke is only trying to help. She knows that Clarke would never do anything to hurt her. She knows Clarke. She lo – she knows Clarke. “I can’t.” Lexa shakes her head in her hands, not really knowing what to say or what to do. “You need to leave.” She repeats herself. “I don’t want you here to see me like this. I need to do this alone.”

She senses Clarke’s presence in front of her, but she refuses to look. Clarke has knelt directly in front of the sitting Lexa, and she slowly brings her hands back up to Lexa’s wrists, forcing them down again, and looking Lexa directly in the eyes. “I’m not leaving.” Clarke, too, repeats herself, and there’s more of an edge of authority ringing in her voice this time. She’s showing Lexa that she means what she’s saying, and that Lexa can’t scare her off. “I will never leave you, and you are not doing this alone. You don’t have to.” Clarke brings Lexa’s hands closer to her own face, and looks down at the hand with the busted knuckles. She leans down and presses kisses all over the lacerations, before looking back up at the brunette, and smiling a small smile.

“Why are you doing this, Clarke?” Lexa whispers to her, as if they’re in a crowded room full of people, and she only wants Clarke to hear her. “Why would you put up with all of this?”

“Because I – “ Clarke closes her eyes briefly and takes a deep breath in. “Because you are the most amazing person that I’ve ever met.” She replies, honestly. “Because I believe you, and I trust you with all of my heart. Because you, Lexa Woods, are the most selfless and giving person, and so much bad shit has happened to you, and I think that it’s time that someone started betting on you, don’t you?” She smiles a little, and notices that there a few more tears building up in Lexa’s eyes again. “Hey.” Clarke says, leaning forward and kissing one of Lexa’s eyes as they flutter closed. “Hey, baby.” She kisses the other eye and pulls back, just slightly. “Don’t cry. I’m here and you’re safe, and we are going to get through this together. Do you hear me?” Lexa nods her head in Clarke’s hands, where they had come up to hold her against her cheeks tenderly. 

They sit there in the quiet for several minutes, neither of them knowing what else to say, and Clarke knows that Lexa just needs some more time to process everything. After a while, Lexa decides to try and stand up, and once she’s up, she turns and helps Clarke to stand, as well. “Thank you.” She says softly, and Clarke can tell that Lexa is embarrassed about the whole ordeal, but she has no reason to be. “You’re – I can’t –“ Lexa groans at herself because she can’t find the words that she wants to say. “I don’t know what I would do without you, Clarke. How I lived my life before you, I will never understand.”

Clarke walks closer to her and puts her hands on either side of Lexa’s face, and kisses her in the most tender way, causing them both to fall even further and further for each other, if that’s possible. “We’re going to get you through this, Lex.” She says quietly. “You deserve a happy ending, don’t you think?” Lexa smiles and leans down to catch Clarke’s lips with her again.

“You do.”

 

//

 

A couple of hours later, Lexa is sitting on the couch with Raven, and Octavia is in the kitchen starting to cook supper for the night. Clarke is back in her bedroom, resting with Finn. He had woken up once and said that he already felt so much better, and he thanked Lexa again for the soup.

She had then gone on to apologize to Raven for the scene that had taken place earlier, and they exchanged a quick hug, which was a lot for them. They were never really the touchy-feely kind of friends. The two of them were watching TV, minding their own businesses, and trying to steer clear of all news outlets on the screen, when Raven’s phone started to ring. She looks at Lexa before getting up and walking to the other side of the room, looking out the window when she answers the phone. “Go for Reyes.”

Lexa sees that her friend nods a lot during her phone conversation. She continues to do that over and over and wonders who it is that Raven is talking to. She feels her heartrate start to pick up when she sees   
Raven’s eyes goes wide and her friend turns to look at her quickly before turning back to look out the window. “Are you serious?” She hears Raven ask. “When? – okay – no that’s – I’ll talk to her. No – yeah I will. Thanks, Linc.”

Raven hangs up and looks to Lexa again, signaling her over towards her, clearly wanting to keep whatever the news was, from Octavia in the kitchen. “What is it?” Lexa asks, as she approached the Latina woman by the window.

“Lincoln says that he has something for you. He wouldn’t really tell me what it was or give me any details, but he insisted on bringing it you himself, instead of shipping it.”

“What the hell? What could it be?” Lexa wonders out loud. “He can’t – I can’t bring him here, Raven. What if someone has been following him? You know that his face has been on the news, too, for being associated with me. I can’t risk someone finding Clarke and Finn.” She continues softly, looking back to make sure that Octavia is not listening to them. “And by someone, I mean Nia’s guys.”

“We could go meet him somewhere.” Raven suggests. “You and me. We can take my truck and drive as far away from here as you want, see what he’s got, and come back. Is that okay?”

Lexa thinks on it for a moment before nodding her head in agreement. She’s scared and curious all at the same time. The plan from the beginning was for her to not have any contact with anyone but Raven, for safety purposes, and if Lincoln insists on this meeting, then it must be important. “When will he be near here?”

“Two days.”

“That’s Christmas eve.” Lexa says. “The day of Clarke’s gallery showcase in town. I’ll have to be here to stay with Finn.”

“Lincoln can meet us early in the morning. I’m sure that Clarke’s showcase isn’t until later, right?” Lexa thinks, but then nods, because of course, Raven is right. “Good.” The shorter woman says. “I guess that it’s time to get back to work.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> What did you think? Let me know in the comments below and feel free to leave kudos! ;)
> 
> Love you all and thanks for reading, as usual, you're the best!
> 
> Follow me on Twitter @asuzh90


	13. You Drive Me Crazy

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey, guys! Sorry for your wait. Hopefully, this update will make up for it. It's got a little, tiny bit of angst, and a little bit of smut, but it's mostly just a lot of fluff. Hope you guys enjoy!
> 
> *There may be a moment in this chapter where you guys will want to kill Raven. Haha. Go easy on her, and also, Clarke is super frisky in this chapter. You're welcome.

Lexa and Raven talked for a while, that night, about their plans for meeting up with Lincoln. Quite honestly, Lexa was, more than a little, scared. What could Lincoln possibly have for her that he couldn’t just send? Or couldn’t just meet Raven with? The whole situation seemed to be sketchier than she would like for it be, but she trusted Lincoln. She did. He has always been there for her, just like Raven. That’s why he is only one of a handful of people that knows where she is. Well, not her exact location, but he knows the vicinity. She refuses, no matter who it, to give out Clarke’s address. She can’t risk it. She has to play this smart.   
That’s why, when she and Raven leave to go meet him, they will have to be extremely cautious. They will have to have their guards up, just in case someone happens to be following him.

Later that night, after she and Raven talked through everything, Raven scuttled her way down to the basement for the rest of the night. Lexa knew that it was still fairly early, but she was exhausted. The day had ended up being more emotionally demanding than she would have liked for it to have been, so she made her way into Clarke’s bedroom. She knew that Finn was still in there with his mother, resting, so she planned to just go in to get her pajamas and stay on the couch tonight to give the pair their space.

When Lexa opened the bedroom door all of the lights were off, except for the light coming from the crack in the bathroom door. She could see that Finn was on the very edge of the bed, where she usually sleeps, and she smiles to herself at how adorable and peaceful he looks in his sleep. Clarke is right behind him, lying flat on her back, mouth slightly parted, and one arm thrown over her eyes. Just watching Clarke and Finn sleep, made her heart soar. She thinks back to earlier during the day when she had had her meltdown in the basement, and Clarke had confronted her about it. Lexa tried to push her away, because she didn’t want Clarke to see her like that. So distraught, and brashly confrontational about everything, but to Lexa’s amazement, however in character it really was, Clarke refused to leave. She rejected Lexa’s incessant pushing of her to just leave her alone. She hadn’t wanted to be alone. Not really, but she also felt like Clarke has done more than enough for Lexa in the little over three weeks that she’s been in the Griffin household.

Clarke Griffin is a saint.

Of course, Lexa already knew that, but Clarke continues to surprise and amaze her. Lexa is in awe of the blonde and everything that she is, and everything that she stands for.

Lexa knocks her own self out of her trance, and walks the short distance to pull her pajamas from the bottom drawer of Clarke’s dresser. She smiles, thinking about the other day when she and Clarke argued about her taking, at least, one of the drawers. Lexa had refused, until Clarke took Lexa’s clothes out of the bag herself, and placed them in the drawer, before sticking out her tongue and walking off. Lexa couldn’t help but to laugh. That was before they had shared their first kiss, and Lexa remembered wanting to kiss her so badly, that it hurt. 

Once Lexa retrieves her pajamas, she slips into the bathroom to change. She slips her flannel pajama pants on, and then removes her shirt. A second later, she hears the bathroom door creak and a very sleepy, adorable Clarke walk in. Clarke’s eyes widen. She clearly didn’t think that anyone was in here, but she doesn’t leave, and a small, tired smile takes residence on her stunning face. She walks closer to Lexa, blue eyes raking across Lexa’s torso, where she is only wearing a black sports bra.

Lexa is sure that her skin is flushed, knowing that Clarke is unabashedly checking her out in the moment. Clarke has seen her shirtless numerous times, because of the gunshot wound, but never like this. Not since they’ve started… whatever this is that they are. “Hey, sleepyhead.” Lexa grins, hoping that Clarke doesn’t see the blush covering her cheeks. She opens her arms wide to accept Clarke as she gets closer, and the blonde greedily sinks into her embrace, nuzzling her nose into Lexa’s neck, right at the juncture of her shoulder. Lexa giggles when Clarke mumbles something unintelligible into her skin, sending shivers throughout her body, and even more so when Clarke rakes her nails down Lexa’s very toned, and very naked stomach. Lexa kisses the top of Clarke’s head, taking in the lavender scent of the blonde’s shampoo. “How’s Finn?” She asks.

“He’s doing better, but I had to give him some Nyquil about an hour ago, so he’s out like a light.” The other woman replies, placing a soft kiss to Lexa’s neck and pulling back so that she can finally see those gorgeous, emerald green eyes. “Hi.” She whispers, causing Lexa to chuckle again, sweetly.

“Hi, yourself.” Lexa grins, leaning in and placing a kiss to Clarke’s awaiting lips. “I’m going to give you and Finn some space.” Lexa says quietly, still not wanting to wake Finn up. “I’ll take the couch tonight.” She finishes, lifter her arms from around Clarke to try and attempt to put her sleep shirt on, but Clarke quickly reaches up to stop her.

“First of all,” Clarke whispers, her blue eyes serious and hypnotic. “You’re not taking the couch. You’re sleeping with us.” She says matter-of-factly. “There’s plenty of room, and secondly – “ Her hand, that’s attached to Lexa’s wrist tightens a bit, and she pulls the shirt from the taller woman’s grasp. “You’re not putting this on just yet.”

Lexa takes a gulp at how serious and commanding Clarke can be. It’s really fucking hot, to be honest, and she’s not afraid to admit it if asked. “Clarke.” Lexa warns softly, and the blonde drops Lexa’s shirt in the floor, and raises an eyebrow up at Lexa. “Finn is on the other side of that door.”

Clarke hums, before leaning in and pressing a few light kisses to Lexa’s neck, causing the brunette to let out a whimper. A fucking whimper. Lexa rolls her eyes at herself and how she has no chill whatsoever. “Thank you, Captain Obvious.” Clarke teases, using her tongue to lick up the column of Lexa’s throat, until she reaches her adorably, tiny ears. “You,” Clarke starts in again, kissing and sucking across Lexa’s sharp jawline, before sinking her teeth into Lexa’s bottom lip, lightly, and pulling it towards her. Queue another whimper from Lexa Woods. Her hands fly out to Clarke’s waist, and the blonde lets her lip go with a light pop. “Are so sexy.” She finishes. Her hands and nails scrape down across Lexa’s sculpted abs, as her eyes continue to take in the sight in front of her.

Lexa Woods is a goddess. 

Clarke has an actual goddess under her touch right now. Under her lips. She bends down, somewhat, to use her tongue, and lick up the length of the brunette’s abs, starting at her navel. She feels Lexa shiver under her touch, and it makes her even more hot. When her lips find their way to just under the band of Lexa’s sports bra, she kisses at the newly formed scar there, and looks up to meet green eyes. She stands up immediately when she sees tears start to form in Lexa’s eyes, and brings her hands to the taller woman’s cheeks. Clarke uses her thumbs to wipe at the few that had fallen already. “Hey.” Clarke mutters when Lexa closes her eyes, embarrassed from always seeming to breakdown around the blonde. “Hey, baby.” Clarke whispers, bringing her lips to graze against Lexa’s, and leaning her forehead against hers as well. “Open those gorgeous eyes for me, Lex.” And she does., and it almost takes Clarke’s breath away. The green magnified and crystalized by the unshed tears that lie there. Lexa brings her lips into a small, tired smile, and presses them quickly to Clarke’s, but only for a moment. “What’s wrong, Lexa?” Clarke asks. “Tell me what’s wrong, please. Did I do something wrong?”

Lexa shakes her head ‘no’, and smiles at Clarke again. “I’m sorry for always crying in front of you.” Lexa says, a wet chuckle leaving her throat in the process. “I haven’t always been this weak.”

“You’re not weak, Lexa.” Clarke replies, her eyebrows crinkling at the brunette’s words. “You’re one of the strongest people that I’ve ever met.”

“Well, you’re the strongest that I’ve ever met.” Lexa smiles, and Clarke leans in the peck her lips again. “It’s just – I, God –“ Lexa laughs. “This is going to sound so sappy.”

“I like sappy.” Clarke smiles.

“I’m just – kind of glad that I got shot.”

Clarke pulls a face that makes Lexa laugh out loud, and she immediately slaps a hand over her own mouth, hoping that she didn’t wake Finn. “What? Lexa –“

“The main reason that I stopped at this house, Clarke, was because I needed something to clean the wound with.” She answers Clarke’s question before she can full ask it. “I had no idea what I was doing, but I knew I would die if I lost much more blood, and or got an infection.” Clarke looked as if she were still trying to catch up and Lexa grinned again. “If I wouldn’t have gotten shot, then I probably wouldn’t have stopped here, and I wouldn’t have met you.” She smiles and places a soft kiss to the tip of Clarke’s nose. “I wouldn’t have ever known you or Finn, and I just –“

Clarke lets a tear loose now, and rolls her eyes teasingly. “Look what you did.” She jokes, pointing at the tear that rolled down her cheek, and Lexa laughed, before leaning in and kissing the tear away. “You were right.” Clarke utters, wrapping her hands around Lexa’s neck, and pulling her closer. Their lips barely grazing, and Clarke knocks her nose gently against Lexa’s, smiling as she meets her gaze. “That was sappy.”   
Lexa rolls her eyes now, too. “But, I guess that I’m glad you got shot, now, too.” She teases once more, and crashes her lips against Lexa’s, and they stay, there, in that moment for as long as they’re able, both of them wanting to say something a thousand times sappier. Three little words that both of them knew that they were feeling in their heart, but too afraid to say.

 

//

 

Lexa wakes sometime in the middle of the night. The room is shrouded in darkness, still, and the silence is almost deafening, which she finds weird, because Finn’s sickness has caused him to snore lightly, while Clarke’s deep breaths usually fill up the room, but they, too, are gone. Lexa turns her head to look over the bed that she’s lying in. Clarke had been in between Lexa and Finn, and now, she’s not. She’s not there, and Lexa immediately misses her warmth. The warmth that seems to follow the blonde everywhere that she goes.

Lexa sits up when she notices that, not only is Clarke missing from the bedroom, but Finn is too. She starts to worry a bit. Did Finn get sick in the middle of the night, again? Are they, maybe, in the living room?

Before Lexa can get herself out from under the blankets, and out of the bed, something catches her eye, when it moves, out of the corner of her vision. Something had moved on the other side of the door. She freezes instantly, because something isn’t right. The small lamp, in the corner of the bedroom, is always on. Clarke leaves it on. Especially if Finn was in the room, but, right now, the lamp is off, and she realizes that that’s why it’s darker than usual in Clarke’s bedroom. She breathes a sigh of relief, though, when she notices the bedroom door crack open, and a tiny amount of light slips in with is. She sees the silhouette of a woman standing there, not moving from her spot in the doorframe. “Hey, baby.” Lexa says, her voice still rough and raspy from her sleep. She sits still on the side of the bed, waiting for Clarke to make her way over to her. “I was wondering where you went off to. Is Finn okay?”

There’s a couple of moments of pause, before a reply comes. “Don’t you worry. Finn is just fine.” Lexa’s body goes rigid when the sound of that voice hits her ears, because it’s not Clarke’s voice. 

It’s Nia’s.

Lexa is sure that she almost passes out, but she can’t allow herself. Nia is here, and Clarke and Finn are missing. This is her worst nightmare. She stands, slowly, not taking her eyes off of the dark figure in the doorway. Lexa flips the lamp, on the bedside table, on, and that’s when she finally sees her. It’s been ten years since she’s seen this woman. This woman who, not only took Lexa’s parents’ lives, but ruined hers in the process. 

Lexa avoids asking the obvious question of why Nia is here, but the answer is also obvious. She’s here for Lexa. “Where are Clarke and Finn?” Lexa asks, her voice betraying her, and sounding weaker than she would have liked, but she can’t help it. She feels sick. She doesn’t know what to do. When Nia’s low chuckle meets Lexa’s ears, she goes off. “Where are they, you bitch?” She screams, the tendons and muscles in her neck and jaw tightening and clenching in anger. In misery. Lexa starts to take a step forward, but is immediately stopped by the sound of her aunt’s voice, once more. 

“No, no, no.” Nia warns, her voice sending shivers throughout Lexa’s tired, scared body. “Take one more step and you will never see the Griffins again, Alexandria.” Nia’s voice is teasing, and manipulative. How did she know their names? How did she find them? How is this happening, now?

“Please.” Lexa chokes out, trying her hardest to hold back the tears that want to fall. “Please, don’t hurt them, Nia.” She pleads. “You can take me. You can do whatever you want with me, but, just, please leave them alone.”

“I see where you’re in no position to command me.” Her aunt argues. “I will do what I think is necessary to keep you and your band of sidekicks in line.” Lexa stares at her blankly, with a million thoughts and worries running through her mind. Two men appear in the hallway behind Nia. Lexa recognizes one of them as Carl Emerson. They move past her aunt, towards her, and she instantly moves to back up against the wall. “Do what you can, to my niece, to find the location of her lackeys.” She says to the men. “We have Reyes. We just need the other two.” They have Raven, too? Shit. Shit. Shit. Lexa starts to thrash and move, but the two men are stronger than she is, and they’re able to manipulate her body any way that they want. Before Nia turns to walk out the door, she spins around to look directly at Lexa for a moment, but then looks over to Emerson. “And don’t be afraid to rough up the blonde if necessary.” Nia walks out and Lexa’s heart leaps to her throat as she screams. 

 

//

 

As soon as Nia slams the door, Lexa shoots up in bed. She didn’t realize that she was actually screaming. Her breathing is quick and out of beat, as well as her heart. Her chest is tight and she’s sure that she’s dying from a heart attack. Tears stream down her face, and her fingers grip into the bedsheets underneath her, and that’s when she feels it. The warmth. The warmth that she had missed earlier. 

Lexa turns her head to the side to see a pair of blue eyes staring at her in fear. The cerulean eyes are filled to the brim with their own tears, and Lexa has no idea what’s going on. “Lex?” Clarke asks softly, her smooth hands, running up the surface of Lexa’s arm. Lexa can’t seem to find her word, because she is still having trouble breathing. “Lexa, baby, shhhh…” Clarke coos, trying her best to soothe the panting brunette beside her. “It’s okay, Lex. It was a dream.” Clarke utters, as she reaches to bring Lexa into a hug. She holds her tight and rubs soothing circles into Lexa’s back. “It was just a dream.” Clarke wonders what had Lexa so upset and emotional during her sleepy state. She had never seen anyone dream like that before. Lexa’s body had started thrashing, next to her, and the brunette’s screams were blood curdling. Clarke was glad that Finn had left, an hour or so ago, to go back to his own bedroom. This would have terrified him.

Clarke holds tightly to Lexa’s body for what feels like an eternity, but she doesn’t care. She’ll do whatever she has to, to bring a calm to Lexa’s storm. After another couple of minutes, Lexa starts to pull away, but Clarke still holds onto her, letting the brunette know that she’s not going anywhere. Lexa wipes at her eyes, trying to rid herself of tears, but it seems almost impossible. Her eyes are red and puffy, but she doesn’t care. “It – it was just a dream?” She asks, still not fully believing that that was the case. “You – you’re here? You’re okay?” Lexa looks across Clarke’s body, and her eyes widen when she doesn’t find Finn’s small body lying on the other side of the bed. “Where’s Finn?”

“Lexa.” Clarke says softly, bringing her hands up to cup Lexa’s cheeks. “He’s fine. He went to his bedroom.” Lexa let’s out a sigh of relief, and she, automatically, feels her heartrate try and settle some.

“Are you – are you okay? You’re not hurt?” Lexa asks again, still not quite sure if she believes this. Clarke smiles a small smile at her, before using her thumbs to wipe at the tears that are still slowly falling from those gorgeous green eyes.

“I’m fine, baby.” Clarke mutters, using her voice and words to try and calm Lexa as best she can. “It’s okay. You’re safe. We’re safe.”

“Nia.” Lexa says, shaking her head and closing her eyes. “Sh – she had you. She had Finn, and they were – going to hurt you to get to me.” She tries to steady her breathing, but she’s not really sure if she’s successful. She doesn’t feel like it. “I can’t – I won’t let that happen to you. I can’t let that happen.” She cries.

“She’s not going to get us, Lex.” Clarke says softly, leaning in to kiss Lexa’s sweating forehead, before she pulls back and leans her own against it. “She doesn’t know where you are. She won’t find us, okay?” Lexa nods her head, but Clarke knows that the brunette is still probably very unsure. “Come here.” Clarke says, lying back on her back, and pulling Lexa with her, until the brunette is on top of her. Their bodies lying flat together. “Try and get some sleep.” Clarke says, running her hand through Lexa’s long, brown hair, and using her other hand to rub soothing circles into Lexa’s lower back.

“I’ll crush you.” Lexa says, pulling back to look worriedly at the woman beneath her and Clarke can’t help but chuckle.

“You won’t crush me, Lex.” She replies, placing a kiss to the brunette’s temple. “Go to sleep. I’m not going anywhere.” She reaches down and pulls the blankets over the top of both of them, and she feels Lexa’s   
body relax a little bit more. 

After about twenty minutes or so, Lexa is sound asleep on top of Clarke, her body seemingly weightless. Clarke is still running her hand across the expanse of Lexa’s back, and curling her other in Lexa’s hair. She presses her lips back to Lexa’s temple, holding them there for longer than necessary. “I’m not going anywhere.” She repeats herself, whispering so lightly that she didn’t even hear herself. “You’re stuck with me.”

 

//

 

Once the sun is up and beaming through the windows of Clarke’s bedroom, Clarke wakes up before Lexa does, and slowly is able to get out from under the weight of the gorgeous woman in her bed, without waking the brunette. Clarke starts with her normal routine, going to the restroom and freshening up, before going to the kitchen to pour herself some coffee. She notices, on her way down the hallway, that Finn and   
Octavia are still asleep in his small bedroom, and smiles when she sees her son curled up into her best friend’s side.

After she pours herself a cup of coffee, she heads back into the bedroom and shuts the door. She grabs her sketch pad from the bottom drawer of her desk, and a couple of charcoal pencils from a box and settles down on the floor beside the bed, under the lamp on her nightstand. Clarke flips through her sketches, looking for one in particular that she’s been working on the past few days, whenever she gets the chance. 

When she finds it, an old picture falls out of the space between the pages. She picks it up, and looks at it with a small, sad smile on her face. Her heart clenches itself at the visual. It’s a picture of Lexa at her high school graduation with both of her parents. Raven had given it to Clarke to work with, and she had told her that it was the last picture that Lexa has of them and with them. Lexa keeps it locked up in the suitcase with all of her money and credit cards, that Raven has the combination to.

Clarke sets the picture aside, and grabs a pencil, before making her way with it to meet the paper in front of her. She’s almost finished with the piece that she’s been working on for part of Lexa’s Christmas present. She just lacks a few finishing touches. Clarke really hopes that Lexa likes the gift, because, in all honesty, what do you buy someone who can afford anything? She’s using her drawing skills to recreate the picture of Lexa and her parents, and crosses her fingers that it’s the right move.

Clarke makes a mental note that she has to run into town today to purchase a frame for the drawing, and also a picture album. To go in the picture album, she has to get all of the photos, that she’s been taking of and with Lexa for the past couple of weeks, developed. She thinks to herself that she should pick apart Raven’s brain to see if that’s a good choice for a gift for the woman sleeping in the bed, above her.

After about another half hour, Clarke is finished with her sketch, and smiles at the finished product. She closes her sketch book, and puts it back into its place, along with her pencils and the photo that Raven had given her. She goes into the bathroom to rid her hands of the charcoal that covers them, and makes her way back into the bedroom. It’s still early, and Lexa is still asleep, so Clarke decides to hop back into bed, and cuddle up to the brunette’s side. Sinking into the bed, and letting out a barely audible sigh, she scoots over towards Lexa and curls up into her chest, under the blankets. Lexa’s scent is intoxicating, and just smelling her, however weirdly it may sound, brings a wave of calmness over Clarke’s body. She digs both of her hands into the fabric of Lexa’s shirt, and presses a few light kisses to the taller woman’s exposed collarbone. “That tickles.” A sleepy voice mutters, startling Clarke and causing her to look up into tired, green eyes. Lexa smiles down at her, and presses a kiss to her forehead. “Good morning, beautiful.”

Clarke feels a blush creep over her, however slight it may be, she doesn’t think that she will ever get used to Lexa to talk to her like that, and even looking at her like that. “I’m sorry. Did I wake you?”

“Yeah.” Lexa teases, and when Clarke tries to pull away, feigning hurt, Lexa pulls her in closer, hugging her tightly to her chest. “I’m kidding.” Lexa chuckles, placing another kiss to the blonde’s head. “How did you sleep?”

“Shouldn’t I be asking you that question?” Clarke asks, knowing full well that Lexa had a very rough night of sleep, considering the earth-shattering nightmare she seemed to have only hours before. She feels Lexa’s body tense a little bit, in her hold, and looks up again to see what the matter is. “Hey.” Clarke says, bringing hands up to rest on Lexa’s cheeks, forcing her to look down at Clarke. “Are you okay?” She asks. “You   
know that you can talk to me, right?”

“I know.” Lexa responds quietly, with a hint of a smile. “And I’m fine.” She continues. “I just – that dre – that nightmare was – it seemed all too real.”

“Well, it wasn’t.” Clarke says, before she places a kiss to Lexa’s awaiting lips. “Finn is okay. I’m okay. You’re okay. We’re all okay.” She grins, knowing that Lexa wants to say something smart. Probably like, ‘That sounds like a song’, or something to that effect. “You’re not getting rid of me Lexa Woods.”

“Is that a promise?” Lexa asks, quirking a brow, and Clarke nods, pulling her bottom lip in between her teeth, and Lexa can’t help herself, because… damn. Clarke is so gorgeous. Lexa moves quickly, surprising Clarke, and straddling her lap.

“Hey!” Clarke chuckles, her hands immediately going to Lexa’s flannel covered thighs. “That’s my position, thank you very much.”

“And, oh, how I love you in this position.” Lexa teases Clarke with a sultry voice, before leaning in closer to the blonde’s face. Lexa’s hands are resting at Clarke’s abdomen, her fingers just barely under the hem of her sleep shirt. “But right now,” Lexa utters, her fingernails scraping, just barely, over the pale skin of Clarke’s stomach, causing a whimper to leave the blonde’s lips. “It’s mine.”

“I, uh –“ Clarke stutters, subconsciously rubbing circles into Lexa’s thighs with her thumbs. “I think that I can deal with that.”

Lexa chuckles, as she leans even closer. “Good.” Clearly, Clarke thought that Lexa was moving entirely too slow, because she leans up, meeting Lexa halfway, and crashes their lips together. She immediately swallows the moan that leaves the brunette’s mouth, and she smiles into their kiss, knowing that she had quickly turned the tables on Lexa. 

Clarke’s tongue, almost instantly, seeks entrance into Lexa’s warm mouth, and Lexa grants it eagerly. The kiss is full of want and emotion, and Clarke’s beginning to think that kissing Lexa is a very spiritual experience. One that she hopes she gets to live through for a very long time. When they have to pull apart for air, Lexa smiles at the look of pure lust in Clarke’s darkened eyes. She grasps at the bottom of Clarke’s sleep shirt, and pulls it, in one fluid motion, over the other woman’s head. Naturally, it being part of Clarke’s pajama ensemble, Clarke isn’t wearing a bra, and Lexa has to take a moment to get her breathing under control. “Fuck.” Lexa breathes out.

It’s Clarke turn to grin now, seeing how dark Lexa’s green eyes, suddenly, are. “See something you like, Miss Woods?”

“I, uh –“ Lexa chokes out. “I’m - not even embarrassed to say how these,” She emphasizes the word ‘these’ by placing her hands over both of Clarke’s breasts and kneading slowly. “Are two of my new favorite things.”

Clarke laughs, but then a quick moan of her own, interrupts the laughter, when Lexa’s fingers pinch at the already hardened nipples. “Is that so?” Clarke teases again, and Lexa can only nod, her gaze still glued to Clarke’s chest. Clarke rolls her eyes, but the smile never leaves her face. “I think that it’s only fair if you take off your shirt too, Lex.” Lexa happily obliges, allowing her hands to leave Clarke’s chest for only a moment, as she crosses her arms in front of her body, grabbing the bottom of her own shirt, and pulling it over her head. Now, Clarke has seen Lexa shirtless many a time, but she has not seen her braless, and the smaller, but perky breasts of Lexa’s only add to the want that Clarke feels in her stomach from seeing Lexa’s toned torso. Clarke grabs at Lexa’s chest before she runs her fingers, scraping her nails, down Lexa’s abdomen. “These are my favorites.” Clarke basically moans, as her fingers skim over Lexa’s abs. 

Lexa leans back down, capturing Clarke’s lips with her own again, and bringing her hands back to Clarke’s chest. “They’re all yours.” Lexa whispers, her lips grazing Clarke’s before catching them again. Clarke has almost had enough of all the teasing. She doesn’t think that she can handle it anymore. She has never wanted someone, in every way possible, this badly, and the fact that Lexa just told her that her abs were just for Clarke, well… that doesn’t help matters any.

“Mine?” Clarke asks, wanting to hear Lexa say it again, for no reason in particular. Their breathing is staggered and Lexa smiles into Clarke’s lips, barely pulling away to speak. Their hot breath mingled together in the perfect dance of sensuality.

“All yours.” Lexa says, nipping at Clarke’s bottom lip before trailing her lips down Clarke neck, to her collarbone, to her chest, where she latches on to an erect nipple.

“Oh, my god.” Clarke moans, arching her back, pressing her chest further into Lexa’s mouth. Lexa’s tongue swirls around and around, causing multiple waves of pleasure to run through the blonde’s body. All Clarke can think is, if Lexa doesn’t stop, then she’s going to lose it way too soon. It’s almost embarrassing until she remembers how long it’s been. Over five years. Five years since older Finn, and that, to some people, might be way too long, but Clarke has needed that time to heal. She’s need that time to piece together her heart again, and now that she has it put back together, she wants to give it away again. 

While Lexa is preoccupied with Clarke’s chest, Clarke’s hand, scraping across Lexa’s abs, makes its way lower. Without any hesitation, she slips her fingers into the waistband of Lexa’s pajama pants and down the front of her underwear to where she dips her fingers into Lexa’s wet folds. “Oh my – holy sh – shit, Clarke.” Lexa moans, as her lips leave Clarke’s nipples. She closes her eyes, because, suddenly, she is feeling light-headed. 

Clarke thinks that she might have moved too fast for Lexa’s liking, so she starts to move her hand back out. “I’m sorry, I – “

Lexa’s hand darts down to catch Clarke’s wrist before she can pull all the way out. Lexa leans back down and catches Clarke’s lips with her own again. “Don’t you fucking dare.” Lexa mutters against Clarke’s lips, causing the blonde to chuckle and place a kiss to Lexa’s nose. 

“So commanding.” Clarke teases, but she does as Lexa asks, and her fingers move back down, and holy shit. Lexa is soaked. Like really fucking soaked, and Clarke can feel her own wetness doubling at the sensation of feeling Lexa for the first time. “Holy shit, babe.” Clarke moans as Lexa’s lips start to suck at her pulse point. “You’re so wet.” Her fingers move slowly, as if she’s calculating what to do next. Should be like riding a bike, right? Lexa’s teeth nip at the skin on Clarke’s neck when Clarke’s fingers skim over Lexa’s clit for the first time.

“Clarke…” Lexa moans, leaning her head against Clarke’s shoulder because she can’t think of anything else, right now, other than the feeling of Clarke’s fingers working through her folds. She knows that, right now, she is most definitely not giving as good as she’s getting, but she can’t help it. She knows that it’s been a long time for Clarke, but it’s been over ten years for her, and this feeling… the feeling that Clarke is giving to her right now, is almost something foreign. 

Trying to clear her mind some, Lexa pushes herself to open her eyes, and when she does, she sees that Clarke is looking at her like she’s in awe. They stare at each other, for what feels like forever, as Clarke’s  
fingers work, almost professionally, on Lexa. She’s teasing at Lexa’s entrance, now, and the brunette has to make herself to continue looking at the woman below her. She leans down to kiss Clarke again, trying to tell her everything that she can’t vocalize right now. She wants to. God, does she want to, but not now. Dropping a bomb, like that, on someone during sex is tacky, in her opinion, and Clarke deserves better than that. Clarke deserves the world.

As Lexa continues kissing Clarke, and slipping her tongue into the blonde’s mouth, her hand slips between them, and stops at the waistband of Clarke’s pants. She breaks their kiss and looks down into blue eyes again. Her heart is pounding and she is sure that her breathing is erratic, but she can’t bring herself to care. Little does she know, that Clarke is in the same boat. “Is this okay?” Lexa asks, wanting to make sure before she just dove right in.

“You –“ Clarke closes her eyes for a second at the feeling of Lexa under her fingers, and the feeling of Lexa’s fingers tracing circles just above her waistband. “You don’t have to just because I am.” Lexa actually rolls her eyes at Clarke and kisses her again.

“I want to, Clarke.” Lexa replies. “More than anything.” She smiles down at her. “I want to feel you. I want to make you feel good, so I’ll ask you again… is this okay?”

“Yes.” Clarke moans, and Lexa’s hand makes its way to its previous destination. She passes by soft, small curls, and then, is instantly hit with the feeling of Clarke coating her fingers. Her fingers work a little quicker than Clarke’s own, trying to catch Clarke up with her. Lexa is having a hard time concentrating as she feels Clarke teasing her entrance with her middle finger, again. 

About the time that Clarke’s finger slips into Lexa’s tight entrance, and the brunette on top of her lets out a loud ‘fuck’, someone knocks on the door, and immediately opens it. Luckily, from the door, all that they could see was Lexa’s bare back, and the feeling of pure horror that washes over the both of them, almost makes them sick. They both think that it is Finn standing behind them, wondering what in the hell is going on, but luckily, if you can call it that, another voice rings through the room.

“Hey, guys can you – oh my – holy fucking shit!” Raven’s voice exclaims. “Oh my god, I’m – shit – sorry – I’ll just leave.” And with that, she does, and Clarke and Lexa hear the door slam.

“You have go to be fucking kidding me right now.” Lexa huffs, leaning over and resting her head on Clarke’s shoulder. “Clarke,” Lexa says softly, moving to where she can see Clarke’s eyes. “I’m so sorry. Clearly, she was never taught to knock and wait before entering.”

Surprisingly, to Lexa, Clarke lets out a burst of laughter, and while a look of confusion crosses Lexa’s face, she too starts to laugh. They laugh for a few second, as Lexa’s hand makes its way out of Clarke’s pants, because she knows that the mood is ruined for the both of them, now. No thanks to her ‘best friend’. Lexa’s laughter dies down though, when Clarke removes her hand from Lexa’s pants, and her blue eyes snap up to meet Lexa’s. Lexa starts to ask what’s wrong, but then Clarke brings her hand up to her own mouth and sucks lightly at her fingers that are covered in Lexa’s juices. She hums at the taste, her blue eyes never leaving Lexa’s, and Lexa think that she might actually die. Holy shit. That’s so hot.

“Holy shit, Clarke,” Lexa whimpers, and she’s not even embarrassed about it. 

Clarke smiles as she removes her fingers, and sits up to where they are both sitting up facing each other, with Lexa still in Clarke’s lap. “You like that, baby?” Clarke asks, her voice sultry and still full of want, no   
matter the fact that Raven had just walked in on them. Lexa can only nod, her mouth slightly agape, and her eyes wide and focused on the unbelievable woman in front of her. “As bad as I don’t want to,” Clarke starts in again. “We should probably get up and go do a little damage control.” Lexa huffs, causing Clarke to chuckle and kiss her lips. Lexa moans, and that’s when Clarke realizes that the brunette is tasting herself on Clarke’s tongue, so the blonde swipes her tongue on the roof of Lexa’s mouth.

“God, Clarke.” Lexa says, pulling back and chuckling at how fucking needy she is right now. “You will be the death of me.” Clarke smiles, kissing her once more, before getting up from the bed and throwing her shirt back on. Lexa watches as she makes her way into the bathroom, and Clarke looks back at her with a smile.

“What? I should probably change underwear.” Clarke shrugs, like it’s no big deal. “From what I felt a moment ago, you should do.” The blonde teases, and sees a blush take over Lexa’s bare torso. “Come on, babe. We can make breakfast together.”

All Lexa can think, as she puts her shirt back on, is there are a lot more activities that she wants to do with Clarke right now. Not make breakfast.

 

//

 

Clarke and Lexa make their way down the hallway, only a few minutes later, exchanging smiles and kisses along the way. Clarke feels like such a teenager again, and she really, really likes it. Lexa brings out a side to her that she hasn’t shown in a long time. Maybe even ever. 

When the pair of them make their way into the kitchen, they notice Raven, Octavia, and Finn all sitting around the bar and their tones become hushed when they spot the other two women walking in. “Mom!” Finn grins, jumping from his seat and running to through his arms around his mother.

“Hey, baby.” She smiles sweetly and leans down to place a kiss to the top of his shaggy, brown hair. “You’re obviously feeling better.” She chuckles, and he nods his head before hugging Lexa’s legs, and motioning for her to pick him up. She does, of course. She can’t deny the kid anything.

“What are we going to do today, little man?” Lexa asks, as she holds Finn in her arms, and uses one hand to tickle his stomach, causing him to giggle. “Baseball, puzzles, movies?”

He hums as if he is in deep thought, and Lexa thinks that he looks adorable. Lexa looks to her left and grins at Clarke, who is watching them intently, before Clarke winks at her, and then lays her head over onto Lexa’s shoulder. Lexa tenses for a moment, not believing how affectionate Clarke is choosing to be in front of Finn, but, obviously, Finn doesn’t care, because he just smiles at his mom and then back at Lexa before answering her question. “Well, I think that it’s too cold to play baseball today.” He replies. “And I’m all out of puzzles.” Finn shrugs his little shoulders and thinks again. “I guess that we can just watch some more documentaries. Is that okay?”

Lexa smiles at him, before doing something that she hasn’t done before, and she doesn’t really know where it came from, but it felt too natural. She leans forward and kisses his forehead, before pulling back and smiling. “If that’s okay with you, kid, then that’s okay with me.” Finn nods vehemently and wiggles himself out of Lexa’s hold.

“Go set us up a queue on Netflix, buddy.” She says with a smile. “Your mom and I are going to make breakfast.”

He gasps excitedly, because, boy, did he like Lexa’s breakfast. Not that his mother’s wasn’t good too, but he adored Lexa’s pancakes. “Pancakes?” He quizzes hopefully. 

“You know it.” Lexa smiles, and he runs off towards the living room and hops onto the couch in one swift motion. Clarke lifts her head from Lexa’s shoulder and faces her, slinging her arms around Lexa’s neck. She feels Lexa tense again, and she lowers her voice, so only the brunette can hear her.

“Is this too much?” Clarke asks, and Lexa looks at her in confusion. “If you don’t feel comfortable with – you know – PDA, I, uh – I can stop.” Lexa’s body relaxes under Clarke’s arms, and her green eyes soften as she looks into blue ones.

“No.” Lexa answers quietly, shaking her head to mirror her answer. “This is perfect.” She continues. “You’re perfect – I just – I didn’t know if you’d be comfortable with –“ Lexa gestures with her head over towards their two friends, who were still sitting at the bar, more than likely, watching them like hawks. 

Clarke lets out a small chuckle, and Lexa grins sweetly at her. “I don’t care about them, Lex.” Clarke smiles, her hands behind Lexa’s neck, playing with the baby curls at the base of the brunette’s hairline. “The closer that I am to you, the calmer I feel, and I don’t care who sees it.” Clarke smiles again, but this time, there’s a hint of shyness. “That probably sounded very stupid, but that – that’s just how I feel. I’m tired of hiding around, and I promise to talk to Finn about this later today.” Lexa is beaming at her at this point, and Clarke’s heart stutters in her chest. “About us.” She clarifies.

“Okay.” Lexa replies, and pulls Clarke closer, their bodies melding into one. Clarke leans up, to close the distance between them, and brings their lips together. It’s weird, but a good weird, knowing that Raven and Octavia are, probably, watching them like two perverts, but she’s glad that they don’t really have to sneak around anymore. It’s freeing and somewhat of a revelation that she doesn’t have to hide her feelings for this woman anymore.

Before they can get too caught up in the kiss, someone clearing their throat, breaks them apart, but Clarke, being Clarke, sneaks in one more peck to Lexa’s mouth before sauntering over to the refrigerator to grabs the ingredients that they would need. “Get a room.” Raven says teasingly, as Lexa walks by her.

“We tried that.” Lexa fired back. “Clearly, privacy is a thing of the past.” She hears Clarke laugh, from behind her, and Raven stiffens at the reminder. She feels scarred from seeing what she saw, only minutes ago.

“In my defense,” Raven says, throwing her hands up, and looking back and forth between Clarke and Lexa, even though Clarke wasn’t really looking at her. “I thought that Finn was still in there with you guys.”

“Well, he wasn’t.” Lexa snapped, irritated that her friend is now the queen of cliterference. 

“Lex…” Clarke warns from behind her, signaling that she was being a little rough on Raven.

“Sorry.” Lexa said under her breath, and turned around to help Clarke. She didn’t miss the fake coughing around the word ‘whipped’, coming from her best friend, but she decided to ignore it.

Before Clarke and Lexa can attempt to make anything, Raven yells at them. “I hope to God, that you two washed your hands!” Octavia laughs this time, knocking herself out of her quite spell. Clarke and Lexa both spin around with a glare and flip both of their best friends off, before Lexa thinks of something that is sure to throw Raven off. Before Clarke retracts her middle finger from the air, Lexa grabs her wrist and brings Clarke’s finger to her own mouth and sucks. Clarke’s eyes immediately turn a few shades darker, and Lexa winks at her before retracting it. 

“There.” Lexa says, trying to hold back her laughter at the look on their friend’s faces. “Should be clean now.”

“Oh, my God!” Raven exclaims, grabbing Octavia’s hand and dragging her with her to the living room. “Insufferable!” Clarke and Lexa burst into a fit of laughter and Clarke places a kiss to Lexa’s lips.

“We really are.” Clarke says through her laughter. 

“Do you think that we’re taking this a little too far?” Lexa asks, only slightly teasing, and Clarke shakes her head ‘no’, erratically. 

“Hell, no.” Clarke grins before kissing Lexa again. She makes herself pull back. “Okay. We have to make these pancakes, now, and you’re way too distracting.” 

“Speak for yourself.”

 

//

 

After breakfast, Clarke recruited Raven and Octavia to run into town with her to finish up her last-minute Christmas list, seeing as Christmas Eve is tomorrow. Clarke is more than a little nervous about Lexa’s gifts. She hopes that she likes them, and appreciates the thought that Clarke has put into them. Clarke knows that she would never be able to afford anything of magnitude for Lexa, so this stuff would have to do, and knowing Lexa, she doesn’t care for the material things anyway.

Raven and Octavia are already outside in the car, waiting on Clarke, while the blonde is inside saying her goodbyes to Finn and Lexa. Raven has already been teasing them about how they will only be gone for a few hours, and to get their sentimental panties out of their asses. Clarke had only laughed, because she likes this little family that the five of them have formed over the past few weeks. Raven is always teasing someone about something, but she isn’t used to when Clarke fires it right back at her.

Clarke walks over to the living room, and presses a kiss to the top of Finn’s head, where he sits on the couch. His eyes are focused solely on the docuseries that he’s been so into over the past couple of days, and he only waves his hand back at his mom. Lexa laughs at Clarke’s adorable faux look of shock, and pulls her in tightly, to hug her before she leaves. “I hate that you have to stay here.” Clarke pouts, her warm breath rolling over the smooth skin of Lexa’s neck, and causing goosebumps to form. “I feel so bad for leaving you here.”

“Don’t.” Lexa grins, even though Clarke can’t see her from their position. “You’ll be back in a few hours, and in the meantime, Finn and I are going to fill our brains full of useless knowledge of sea animals.” Clarke chuckles, and places a kiss to Lexa’s neck, and she only then realizes how domestic this all feels. It feels almost too good. Too real. Nothing in life is this perfect, right?

“I just wish that I could stay and cuddle with you and Finn on the couch all day.” Clarke pouts again, and Lexa finds it so adorable, her heart swells. “But, I have to finish this last-minute stuff.”

Lexa leans in a places a kiss to Clarke’s forehead, and Clarke never realized how much she loved forehead kisses until she met Lexa. “Go on.” Lexa says softly, as she pulls back. “Go have fun with the girls. You deserve to go out and have a nice day.” She smiles. “And then later, tonight, we can do all of the cuddling that you want.”

“Just cuddling?” Clarke asks, wiggling her eyebrows and causing Lexa to laugh. God, she’s never acted like this with anyone, but she can’t help herself around the taller woman. 

“We can do whatever you want to, babe.” Lexa kisses her lips quickly, and pulls away, forcing Clarke out the door. 

As Clarke makes her way to the car, she spins around and yells one last thing at Lexa before leaving. “This time, we’re locking the door!”

 

//

 

“So, Griffin…” Raven sighs, breaking the silence that has seemed to form inside the vehicle. They’ve only been driving about ten minutes, but Clarke has felt more than a little uncomfortable, because she knows what’s on everyone’s mind. Especially Raven’s. “What are your intentions with my best friend?”

Clarke groans, and tightens her grip on the steering wheel, causing Raven and Octavia to laugh out loud. Of course the two of them would team up on her, and tease her about this. She can only assume that Raven has already filled Octavia in on her and Lexa’s morning shenanigans that Raven had, unfortunately, run in on. “Are we really doing this?” Clarke asks, her eyes not leaving the road.

“You bet your ass we are.”

Clarke sighs, and starts. She doesn’t really know what Raven is looking for exactly, but she knows that if this was her best friend getting involved with someone that she barely knew, then she would definitely have a few questions as well. “Lexa and I – we haven’t spoken, really, about what we are – in terms of relationships.” Clarke glances over to look at Raven, who is eyeballing her purposefully. “I care about her.” Clarke starts in again, taking a peek in the rearview mirror to see Octavia nod her head, giving Clarke the courage to continue. “So much.” Clarke smiles, and Raven fake gags. “I’ve never felt this way about anyone before. Not even little Finn’s father.” She admits, and she sees Octavia’s eyes widen in shock of the admission. Clarke had not told her this. How far her feelings were really going for Lexa. “I don’t want to be with anyone but her.” Clarke says, looking back over at Raven.

Raven hums, as if she’s thinking about how to word her next statement. She knows that Clarke’s feelings are real. That much is evident in the way that the blonde looks at her best friend. They act like they’ve known each other their whole lives, and that really intrigues Raven. “You realize that, if something were to happen, in terms of the whole Nia, FBI, criminal situation, that Lexa will have to leave at some point, right?”

Clarke knows. God, does she know. At night, when she’s trying to fall asleep, cuddled up into Lexa’s strong arms, all that she can think about is how much she doesn’t want this to end, and that at some point, Lexa will have to leave. She knows that it doesn’t have to be for good, though. Lexa would never do that to her. If she had to leave, then the brunette would leave, do what she had to in order to clear her name and put Nia away, and come back to her. She knows that Lexa would come back to her and Finn. Thinking this way, Clarke knows that it’s insane, seeing as they’ve only known each other a short amount of time, but her connection with Lexa is something incredible. Something completely out of this world. “I know that.” Clarke admits, but she doesn’t back down. “And I will be right behind her, helping her to do whatever she has to. I will wait for her.” She says, looking over to Raven again. “She’s got more than just you, now, Raven.” The blonde smiles, trying to show Lexa’s best friend that she means every word that she says. She’s not bullshitting.

“You love her.” Raven says, and the fact that it’s a statement and not a question doesn’t go unnoticed by Clarke. Her eyes widen, and her heart starts to beat frantically. She looks into the rearview mirror, where   
Octavia, too, looks a little stunned, but she nods again at Clarke, telling her that it’s okay. That she’s here for her.

Of course, Clarke knows, by now, that she loves Lexa. She loves her so much, that it almost hurts, and that’s completely ridiculous, but that’s the way that she feels. It’s a good hurt. A wonderful hurt, and she wouldn’t trade it for a thing. She has to bite her tongue, every time that she’s in Lexa’s presence, so that she doesn’t let it spill out. Those three little words are not anything to be trifled with. She knows that. She’s never been in love with anyone but Finn, so saying it to someone else is definitely a big deal. Clarke knows that she has to tell Lexa how she feels. She knows that she can’t hold it in anymore, but she only hopes that Lexa feels the same way about her. It’s weird to think that, only a few weeks ago, they were complete strangers and Clarke had thought that Lexa was a murderer. She shivers at the thought, but smiles when she thinks of where they are now. “I do.” Clarke finally admits, startling both Raven and Octavia. “I love her very much.”

Raven lets out a small chuckle and a puff of air, as if she had been holding her breath. “Wow.” She says. “I mean, holy shit – this is – crazy.” Clarke gives her a look, similar to a glare, and Raven fixes her words. “It’s a good crazy. I never thought I would see Woods like this again. I just hope that we can clear her name. Prove to the world that she is the opposite of the monster that they think she is.”

“We will.” Clarke says, as if she had no doubt in her mind. We have to, she thinks to herself. 

Silence washes over the three women in the car, and Clarke can see the silhouette of the town only a couple of miles away, before Raven speaks again. “So, did you finish your drawing for Woods?”

“I did.” Clarke smiles. “Thank you for letting me use the photo. Do you think that she’ll like it?”

“Well, depending on your drawing skills,” Raven teases, earning her a glare from Clarke. “I think that she’ll love it. Getting her anything else?” She asks.

“I’m going to pick up a photo album today, and get a bunch of photos of us developed while we’re out, to fill it with.” Clarke shrugs. “I know that she would probably like some photos to hold onto after all of these years of nothing. I want her to know that, no matter where she goes in life, that she will always have people here that love her.”

“Woah, Blondie.” Raven says, her voice a little firmer than Clarke is used to. “You better be fucking glad that you invited me with you.”

“Why?” Clarke asks, suddenly interested in what Raven is saying.

“Because, were you planning on developing these pictures at some sort of kiosk? Like at Walgreens’ or something?”

“Yeah.”

“Holy shit.” Raven chokes. “You can’t, Clarke. Uploading those pictures from your phone to that kiosk… that just opens it up for the FBI. If Lexa’s face pops up on anything like that, then the feds would be all over that. Facial data scan and all that shit.”

“Oh my God.” Clarke croaks, and brings a hand to her mouth. Raven thinks that she sees tears building in the blonde’s eyes. “Oh my – I almost fucked it all up. Raven – I – I can’t believe that I almost did that. I would have gotten her caught.”

“Hey, Griff.” Raven says softly, trying to soothe her, because she knows that she probably got a little firm with her a second ago. “It’s okay. You didn’t. I’m here, and you didn’t do anything wrong.”

“Yeah, because you stopped me, Raven.” Clarke cries. “How could I have been so stupid?” About this time, Clarke’s car comes to a stop in front of a craft store and she releases her seatbelt to allow her to breathe better.

“Clarke.” Octavia says, scooting forward and putting a calming hand on her best friend’s shoulder. “It’s okay. Yeah. It would have been bad, but it didn’t happen. I would have never guess uploading pictures like that, would allow the FBI to see them. There’s no way that you could have known that either.”

After another couple of minutes, Raven and Octavia have Clarke calmed down, finally, and the three of them pile out of the car. Raven told Clarke that she could develop them with her equipment back at the house, and that she would do it as soon as they got back. As they entered the craft store, Clarke pulls out her cellphone to see if she has any calls or messages, knowing that she had forgotten to turn her phone off of silent this morning. She smiles widely when she sees that she has a text from Lexa, and she smiles even more widely, remembering everyone giving her iPhone lessons. She’s really come a long way since then.

LEXA (11:32AM) – Is it bad that I miss you like crazy already?

Clarke chuckles to herself, because yeah… it is pretty ridiculous, but she feels the exact same way.

CLARKE (11:57AM) – Not having fun learning about sea animals with my son?  
LEXA (11:58AM) – Of course, I am, but I just wish you were here with us. :(  
CLARKE (11:58AM) – To answer your question. No. It’s not bad that you miss me already.  
CLARKE (11:59AM) – I miss you like crazy, too, baby.  
LEXA (12:01PM) – Is it bad that it drives me crazy when you call me ‘baby’?  
CLARKE (12:01PM) – No. Because I feel the same way.  
CLARKE (12:02PM) – I should probably turn my attention back to our friends.  
CLARKE (12:02PM) – Raven is already teasing me about my dopey smile.  
LEXA (12:03PM) – I love your smile.  
CLARKE (12:04PM) – Flatterer. But thank you. I’ll text you back soon, okay? Tell Finn I said ‘behave’.  
LEXA (12:05PM) - He’s offended that you think that he doesn’t behave.  
LEXA (12:05PM) – But okay. Be careful and have fun.  
CLARKE (12:07PM) – Thanks, baby. You too.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well, what did you think? Let me know in the comments below and feel free to leave kudos. :)
> 
> Thank you all for being such faithful readers! You're all awesome and I love you!
> 
> Follow me on Twitter @asuzh90


	14. Not Giving Up

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wow. Okay, guys. I know that some of you probably hate me for making you wait so long. It's been, what, like 3 months? Holy shit. My bad. Life got away with me. Between my job, traveling, some family medical emergencies, and my love life (which is honest to God, sounding more and more like an AU fic every day. I promise to write about it... with Clexa of course.)
> 
> Thank you guys so much for staying with me and being patient. I'm not too sure on how good this chapter will be. It's probably pretty choppy because I've only had the chance to write bits and pieces here and there. Hopefully, it's okay.
> 
> I'll be working on the last chapter of 'My Best Friend's Wedding' fic, before updating this one again.
> 
> This chapter is titled "Not Giving Up", and I want to dedicate it to a friend who just recently came out to her parents, and who inspires me without even having really met her. You know who you are. :)
> 
> Enjoy, guys

Clarke doesn’t know what’s going on. She had finished up her last-minute shopping and she, Raven, and Octavia were picking up their dinner when her phone chimed with a text message. It was from Lexa and it said that she needed to get home quickly. Clarke’s first thought was, of course, about her son. She had immediately asked Lexa if Finn was alright and the brunette responded saying that he was fine. Clarke let out a sigh of relief, but was still fairly anxious about what was going on back at her house.

She and the two other women made their way, quickly, back to the house. The drive from down back to the house usually took around half an hour, but the drive only took twenty minutes with Clarke driving faster than normal. 

As soon as Clarke put the car into park, she exited the vehicle and left her bags in the trunk as she ran inside. What she sees when she walks into the house, from the front door, startles her. She stops in her tracks and she feels her heartrate speed up at the sight of Lexa sitting in the hallway with her back leaned up against Finn’s bedroom door. The brunette has her head in her hands as her body shakes. Clearly, she’s crying.

“Lexa?” Clarke calls as she steps forward a few more steps. Her voice is soft and calculating. When she doesn’t receive a response or even a look, she closes the distance between them and squats down beside the brunette. Clarke carefully places a hand on the woman’s shoulder and she flinches at the touch. “Lexa – baby, what’s wrong?” Clarke asks and glances behind Lexa at Finn’s closed door. “Whe – where’s Finn?” When Lexa’s eyes finally look up to meet Clarke’s cerulean, the blonde is pretty sure that she feels her heartbreak at the look in Lexa’s emerald eyes. Tears cause the green to become even more beautiful, and   
Clarke didn’t realize that that was even humanly possible, but it is.

“He – he…” Lexa shakes her head and rubs a hand over her tear stained cheeks. Clarke moves a hand up as well to aid in wiping away the tears, but to Clarke’s confusion, Lexa pulls away. “He saw.” Lexa mutters   
and looks back up to Clarke. “Finn saw, Clarke. He knows.”

“Saw what, Lex?” Clarke asks, her forehead crumpled in misunderstanding. “What are you talking about?” At the blonde’s question, Lexa points at over at the television screen that is still lit up in the living room.   
Clarke gaze follows the direction of Lexa’s finger to where it’s pointing in the living room. On the screen, there is clearly a picture of Lexa. Her mugshot to be exact. Clarke’s heartbreaks even more when she sees how red and swollen Lexa’s eyes are in the photograph, knowing how heartbroken the brunette was at this time since she had just found her parents’ dead bodies and was charged with the crime of murder. 

Under the photo of Lexa, there is a brightly colored banner that rolls across the screen. The words are in all caps to make sure and capture the full attention of the viewers.

MURDERER/ESCAPEE STILL NOT CAUGHT:  
$100,000 REWARD OFFERED FOR ANY INFORMATION ON WOODS’ WHEREABOUTS

“Shit.” Clarke utters, her hand coming to rub on the back of Lexa’s neck, and once again the taller woman pulls away and Clarke feels her heart sink. “Lexa – it’s okay. I’m sure that he’s just confused. I can – we can talk to him, and it will be fine.” Clarke says quickly, not knowing if she fully believes all of that or not.

“He’s scared, Clarke!” Lexa argues, but tries to keep her voice low enough that she doesn’t scare Finn any further. She stands and paces back and forth in front of the boy’s door. “He’s terrified.” She repeats. “And he was pretty fucking good excuse to be terrified. He – he thinks that I’m a monster.”

“He doesn’t think that, Le –“

“You don’t know that, Clarke!” Lexa says a little louder this time as she runs her fingers through her hair nervously. Tears are still falling and she can’t stop them. “You didn’t see him. I tried to turn it off before he could figure out what they were saying, but I wasn’t quick enough. I didn’t - I couldn’t stop it.”

Clarke walks closer to the brunette and reaches out for her arm, but once again Lexa pulls out of her reach. “Why won’t you let me touch you?” Clarke asks with a sad voice.

“I ruined it.” Lexa says softly, not looking to meet Clarke’s gaze. “I fucked everything up. Like everything else in my life. I knew that I – I shouldn’t have come here.” She says, and Clarke immediately feels like she’s been stabbed in the chest.

“Lexa – baby – you don’t mean –“

“Stop, Clarke.” Lexa says quietly. “Please, don’t call me that. I can’t do this. I shouldn’t have barged into your life like I did.”

“No.” Clarke says, with a shake of her head and a tear falling down her cheek. “You stop. Stop saying stuff like that. You don’t get to do that. It was my idea for you to stay, and it was the best decision that I ever made.” Clarke reaches for Lexa’s wrist quick enough that the brunette doesn’t have time to move it away. Clarke holds onto her firmly, and pulls her a little closer. “We are going to go in here,” Clarke says, putting a hand on the doorknob of her son’s room. “And we are going to talk to Finn. Together. And we are going to make him see that those are all lies.” Clarke wills herself to smile, but she knows that it comes off as forced. “Fabrications made up by people who have no idea about what’s going on.”

Clarke doesn’t give Lexa a chance to refuse before she’s knocking on the door. She hears Finn mumble something on the other side. She can hear how raspy his voice is, most likely from crying. “Finn. It’s mommy.” Clarke says sweetly. “Can you please come open the door?” She doesn’t hear a reply at first, and a few seconds go by before she starts again. “Finn –“ She’s interrupted by the sound of the lock clicking, and the door creaking open, but just barely. She’s sees her son’s eyes for the first time, and much like the photo on the screen in the living room, his eyes are red and swollen from his own tears.

Clarke feels her heart constrict at the sight. She knows that he must be terrified. She can only imagine all of the thoughts that are running through his mind right now. She feels Lexa pulls a little bit in her grasp, but she refuses to let go. “Hey, little man.” Clarke smiles. “Can you please let mom and Lexa in so that we can all talk?”

“No!” He answers quickly, causing both Lexa and Clarke to flinch. “Just you, mommy.” Clarke looks out of the side of her eye to Lexa. The brunette refuses to meet her gaze and immediately pulls away from Clarke’s unsuspecting hand and takes off down the hallway, and towards the front door.

“Lexa!” Clarke calls after her, but it’s too late. Lexa is already out the door. She wants to run after her. She knows that she needs to run after her, but she also needs to see to her son. She needs to make sure that   
Finn knows what’s going on. She can’t let him think bad things about Lexa. Clarke wishes that she could be in two places at once. She needs to be with Finn, but she also needs to be with Lexa. This is not how she was expecting this evening to pan out.

“Finn.” Clarke says softly when she turns around to finally look at him. She kneels in front of her son and pulls him in for a tight hug. He still looks terrified and there are still a few rogue tears streaming down his cheeks. “It’s okay, baby. Everything is alright.”

“No, momma.” He says, shaking his head and pulling away from his mother’s arms. “She’s bad. Le – Lexa’s bad.” Clarke feels like the wind has been knocked out of her by Finn’s statement, and she’s suddenly glad that Lexa isn’t here right now. Those few words would have devastated Lexa even more than she already was. “She killed her mom and dad.”

“No.” Clarke responds, almost immediately and Finn flinches at how rough her voice sounds. Clarke lays a calming hand on her son’s shoulder and pulls him a little closer to her. “Finn, Lexa didn’t do anything like that. She hasn’t done anything bad.” Clarke starts even though she’s not entirely sure what she really needs to say. He’s five for Christ’s sake. How do you explain something like this to someone so young? “A very bad person did that and blamed Lexa for it so that they could take over her family’s business and money. Lexa’s been in jail for something that she didn’t do, and now she’s out so that she can put the right person in jail. Does that make sense?”

Finn looks confused to say the least, which is to be expected. His tiny eyebrows furrow in thought and he looks down at his feet while twirling his fingers together. “But those – the police are looking for her.”

Clarke nods her head. “They are.” She replies. “They are looking for her, but we have to help hide her. At least for now. At least until she can find the really bad person.”

“Won’t we get in trouble?”

“We just have to be very careful.” Clarke answers, not really knowing what else to say. She isn’t going to lie to him anymore. “No one can know about Lexa.”

“I hurt her feelings.” Finn says quietly, his head still hanging down to look at the ground. He rocks back and forth on his heels, and Clarke sees a few new tears start to fall. “I didn’t – I shouldn’t have said those mean things about her. I love Lexa.” He adds. 

Clarke smiles a small smile and nods her head at his words. “I know, Finn.” She utters. “I love her too, but Lexa will forgive you. She’s not mad. Just upset. She didn’t want you to hate her and think that she was a bad person.”

Finn’s shoulders still slump over causing his back to bend and his head to fall towards his mother’s shoulder. She can tell that he is crying by the way that his body shakes ever so often, and she wraps her arms around him tighter. “Hey, buddy.” Clarke whispers, bringing her hand to his small face, and lifting it up so that their eyes meet. “I’m going to go find Lexa and bring her back, okay?” Clarke leans in to place a soft kiss to Finn’s cheek and he can only nod. “Will you be okay here with Aunt O and Raven?” He only nods again, and Clarke hugs him one last time before standing and heading back towards the door. 

The first thing that she notices, is that Raven is obviously furious as Octavia stands by her side. The second, is that Raven’s small truck is missing from the driveway. Clarke makes her way over to the other two women and gives Octavia a quizzical look. “Where’s Lexa?” Is the first thing that she asks because that’s really the only thing on her mind right now.

“Woods –“ Raven gestures wildly into the air, her anger obvious throughout her face. “Fucking took my truck. She wouldn’t tell me what was up.” Raven looks over to Clarke to get a read on the blonde and notices how upset she looks at the moment. “What the hell happened, Blondie?” Raven’s voice is annoyed and authoritative.

“Hey.” Octavia steps in and gives Raven a ‘go-to-hell’ type look. “Don’t talk to her like that. You need to step back and trust that Clarke knows what she’s doing.” Clarke’s best friend looks over towards her and nods. Clarke responds with a small, sad smile and then looks back to Raven.

“Do you, Clarke?” Raven asks with a hint of sarcasm. “Do you know what you’re doing?”

“I’m going after her.” Clarke says. “Which way did she go?”

 

//

 

It’s dark now. She’s been driving for what feels like hours and, but she knows that she’s not far from where she had first left off. Clarke’s house. Lexa keeps turning and turning as she drives the car around the same thirty miles of road in circles. Her mind is stuck on the look that Finn had given her when he first saw her face on the television screen. All that her ears can hear are the words that spilt from his lips. The words that singlehandedly shattered her heart. One of the most important people in her life now thinks that she’s a bad person. He is scared of her.

After about another twenty minutes of driving, Lexa pulls up to her destination and sees a very old, but familiar face. The tall brunette gets out of Raven’s truck and walks slowly over to the bulky man in front of her. Despite her mindset right now, she can’t help but smile when he walks forward with a smile of his own and wraps her into a tight hug. 

“Lincoln.” Lexa mutters into the big man’s shoulder. His grips tightens around her, as if to hold her closer.

“It’s been a long time, boss.”

When they finally part, Lincoln gives her another smile and then nods towards the small shed in which his car is parked in front of. She had gotten Lincoln’s contact info from Raven’s phone, which was still in the truck and called him immediately. He had been surprised when she called him, but quickly agreed to meet her tonight instead of the next morning like they had originally planned. “What I have for you is in there.”   
He says firmly, and his serious expression doesn’t go un-noticed by Lexa. She swallows without really thinking much about it. She doesn’t know what it is. She doesn’t know what it could be, and this makes her extremely anxious.

The entire atmosphere seems weird. A small, abandoned shed in the middle of the woods, probably no more than fifteen miles from Clarke’s house. Lexa tries not to think about blue eyes right now. She can’t.   
That won’t work out. Of course it wouldn’t. How could she have thought that she could have actually had something with Clarke and Finn.

“Lex.” Lincoln’s voice breaks her out of her reverie and brings her back into reality. “You okay?”

“Yeah.” She clears her throat and shakes her head, looking down at her feet for a split second. “Yeah – uh, just –“ Gesturing towards the shed as she walks by Lincoln’s side. “Let’s see what we’ve got.” The pair walk up to the shed and Lincoln digs for a set of keys out of his deep pockets. The lock on the door is brand new, telling Lexa that Lincoln had just bought it himself, and whatever is behind the door… It’s something big.

After fumbling with the keys for what feels like an eternity, Lincoln finally manages to unlock the lock. He looks back to Lexa before he opens the door. “Promise not to freak out on me?” He asks, and this question doesn’t help Lexa’s anxiety in the least bit, but she manages a small nod before he opens the door completely.

The two step into the shed, and darkness swallows them whole. Lincoln walks over to the corner of the small room and flips on a lamp that he had obviously brought with him. As soon as the area lights up with an orange glow, Lexa sees it. Or rather, him.

There. Sitting in the middle of the room, hands tied behind his back behind a chair, and feet chained together with a gag in his mouth, is Carl Emerson. Lexa immediately looks over to Lincoln whose eyes are wide, probably in fear of what Lexa will do. She then looks back to the man bound with chains around his entire body. Clearly, Lincoln had taken the extra precautions not to let this man out of his sight.

“You – how did you –“

Lincoln steps closer and place a hand on his friend’s shoulder. “We found him in Seattle.” He replies. “Nia was away in New York, and Nyko and I took the opportunity when it arose.”

“Were you followed?” Lexa asks, immediately thinking of Clarke and Finn’s safety. She couldn’t live with herself if something were to ever happen to either one of them. “Tell me that you didn’t lead anyone here, Lincoln.” Her voice comes out more harshly than she would have liked, but she sees that Lincoln thinks nothing of it.

“No.” He shakes his head to mirror his answer. “I wasn’t followed. Nyko was with me in Seattle. We ended up splitting up at one point without them noticing. Nyko led the goons, behind us, to the airport. He made it look like he was sending some things out to you.”

“So, where do these people think that I am, now?”

“Atlanta.”

Lexa sighs and looks to her feet. “They’ll be looking for him.”

“I’ve got it under control, boss.”

“Please, stop calling me ‘boss’.” She mutters and Lincoln’s face grows a small smile. 

“No can do.” He says and then looks back over to Emerson who is out like a light. “What do we do with him, now?” Lincoln asks, gesturing with his head over towards the man tied up in the middle of the room.

“You –“ Lexa says, as if she had anticipated his next question. Her answer was ready and on the tip of her tongue. “Are going to step outside and keep watch. I need some time with Mr. Emerson, here.” Lincoln gives his friend a wary look, but knows that she needs this. She needs answers, and he will allow her the time that she needs to get them. Lincoln nods his head before turning and exiting the shed, leaving Lexa alone with one of her worst nightmares. 

The man that murdered her parents.

 

//

 

“What do you mean that you forgot that you left your phone in the truck?” Clarke huffs into the phone, as she slowly drives down all of the back roads that she can find. She’s been out driving, searching for Lexa for a few hours now, and she had almost given up hope. That was until Raven called her and said that she had left her cell phone in the truck that Lexa had taken.

Raven speaks into the receiver to respond to Clarke. “I just left it there, okay?” The Latina woman mutters. “That’s not the point. The point is that I can track it. I’m sure that it’s still there. Lexa knows absolutely nothing about technology. I can assure you that she has no idea that I can track it.”

Clarke is practically beaming, but she still manages to groan into the phone just to piss Raven off. “And you couldn’t have thought of this two hours ago?”

“Shut it, Blondie, and give me a sec.”

Clarke can hear the tapping of the keyboard and the frustrated huffs coming from Lexa’s friend for the next couple of minutes. She hopes that this will work. She hopes that she can find Lexa and that the brunette is okay. Even though it’s only been a few weeks, Clarke doesn’t know what she would do without Lexa. She’s become such a constant in her life. A rock of sorts. It’s like she’s been missing a piece of herself for a long time, maybe even forever, and she’s finally found it in Lexa. 

“There.” Raven’s voice startles her. She had almost forgotten that she was on the phone with anyone. “Where are you, Clarke?”

Clarke takes in her surroundings through the windows of the car before answering. “Almost at the intersection of County Road 53 and Arkadia Drive.” She hears Raven laugh, and her brow furrows in confusion.   
What could Raven possibly be laughing about at this moment? “What is it?”

“Lexa.” Raven replies. “She’s uh – just about three miles up the road.”

“Are you serious?” Clarke groans, but she can’t help sense of relief that floods through her body at the statement. “I’ve driven past this like five times tonight.”

“Yeah, well… looks like she’s off in the middle of the woods, so I hope that you brought your flashlight.”

“Okay.” Clarke utters. “Thanks, Raven. Send me the exact address and I’ll take it from there. She must have left truck tracks in the grass.”

“Will do, Griff.”

“Oh, and don’t forget to print those pictures that I uploaded to your computer.”

“Aye, aye, Captain.”

Clarke rolls her eyes as she hangs up the phone, and she can feel her heart pounding in her chest. In excitement or in nervousness? She isn’t quite sure, yet. The three-mile drive seemed to take forever, but she knows that it only took around five minutes. She just can’t wait to see Lexa, and to hold her in her arms. Clarke knows that it’s ridiculous to miss someone that she saw only four hours ago, but she can’t help it.   
She has to make sure that Lexa is okay. She has to let Lexa know that Finn isn’t scared of her. That he loves her.

She has to know that Clarke loves her.

When she parks the car on the side of the tiny gravel road, she immediately notices fresh tire tracks leading off into the scarcely wooded area. She knows that her small car will not make it through the brush, so she continues following the tracks on foot. Luckily, for her, she doesn’t have to walk long before she sees a small light ahead of her. It’s dim, and just barely there, but she sees it. This has to be her. This has to be Lexa, but before she can take another step forward, strong arms grab her from behind and she feels like she might actually die of a heart attack.

A tight hand immediately wraps around her mouth and a deep voice speaks. “Who are you and why are you here?” The hand releases, but only a bit so he’s sure that she will not scream. Clarke turns her head a tiny amount and is able to see who her detainer is. 

“Lincoln?” She asks, and she feels his arms immediately loosen a bit. “Lincoln Sykes?”

“How –“ He shakes his head. Of course this girl knows who he is. His and Nyko’s photos have been plastered all over the television along with Lexa’s. “I asked you a question.”

Clarke turns and he finally lets her go. The blonde clearly isn’t a threat to him. “I’m Lexa’s –“ She pauses. She doesn’t know what they are. It seems juvenile to want to call Lexa her girlfriend, but that’s exactly what she wants. She wants to call Lexa her girlfriend, but she refrains. “I’m a friend of Lexa’s.” She answers instead, and Lincoln scrunches his eyebrows together. She can tell that he is not sure whether to believe her or not. “She and Raven have been staying with me. I have a home about twenty miles from here.”

The two stare at each other for what feels like eternity, and it looks as though Lincoln is about to speak. That is, until a thud comes from the place where she had seen the light earlier. Her eyes are focused better now, and she can see that the light is coming from a tiny, abandoned garden shed a few yards away. She takes a step forward, only to be stopped by a strong hand to her wrist. “I can’t let you do that.” Lincoln’s strong voice carries well in the silence of the woods

As if she weren’t already anxious enough, the way that Lincoln insists that she stay away from the small building only makes her nerves worse. She jerks her hand away before walking even closer. She hears his footsteps behind her, and she doesn’t know why, but she starts to run, closing the distance between she and the shed in just a couple of seconds. She slings the door open, and immediately freezes when she sees the sight in front of her.

Lexa is standing in the middle of the building, under the lone lightbulb. Beneath the tall woman, is a man. He is chained to a chair, and his face is bloodied and broken. As are Lexa’s hands. Clarke can see that   
Lexa is out of breath, the way that her chest rises and falls in quick accord. What the hell is going on in here? Who is this guy? And more importantly, how could he have had such an effect on someone as gentle and loving as Lexa?

“Lexa?” Clarke’s voice seems small as it attempts to cut through the tension in the air. Lexa’s eyes are wide, and she immediately drops the fist that was halfway through the air when Clarke had burst through the door. Lexa walks towards Clarke and Lincoln, who is now standing in the doorway as well, and gives the man a death glare that would send chills down anyone’s spine. 

“What the hell, Lincoln?” She spits. “You just let her barge in here like this?”

“I – I’m sorry, boss.” He stutters, and if the scenario that they were in wasn’t so sensitive right now, Clarke would have probably laughed seeing this big guy so scared of Lexa. “She just – she ran, and I - I didn’t know –“

Lexa halts his words with the raise of a hand, and swiftly takes a hold of Clarke’s. She doesn’t drag her, but looks her in the eye to make sure that Clarke knows to follow her. Lincoln knows better than to follow right now, so he stays behind in the shed to guard the man in the chair. 

Once Lexa feels as if she’s far enough away from the garden shed, she turns and looks to the blonde woman that has quickly made her way into Lexa’s heart. She honestly doesn’t know what to say. What Clarke just saw… it’s something that can’t be unseen. To Lexa’s surprise, Clarke doesn’t look terrified. She looks worried, and more importantly, she looks worried for Lexa.

“Lexa – “

“I’m sorry.” Lexa interrupts, shaking her head and looking down at her feet. Her hand is still entwined with Clarke’s and her palms are sweating, but Clarke doesn’t seem to care. Clarke raises a brow in question to Lexa’s apology. The blonde doesn’t understand why Lexa is apologizing to her right now. “I’m sorry – I shouldn’t have – you weren’t supposed to –“

Clarke squeezes Lexa’s hand, reassuring her that she is here and she’s fine. “Who was that?” Clarke asks, and she’s actually scared of Lexa’s answer. This is like nothing that she’s ever seen before. Especially from Lexa. This is so unlike the taller woman that she has grown so accustomed to. 

Lexa still refuses to look at Clarke; her head still hung in shame, glaring at the ground. Clarke gives the other woman’s hand another reassuring squeeze, and green finally looks up to meet blue. There are visible unshed tears glazing over the forest green eyes in front of her, and the sight almost breaks Clarke’s heart. “Lexa – please –“ She says softly, and taking a small step closer to the woman in front of her. The darkness surrounds them, but there is still light coming from the lamp back at the garden shed; enough for Clarke to make out all of the sharp and beautiful features that Lexa’s face has to offer. “You can talk to me. Who   
was that?”

Taking a deep breath and steadying herself in the process, Lexa shakes her head slowly but her gaze remains on the blonde beside her. “It’s – he’s –“ Another breath, and a loud exhale up into the sky. “That’s Carl Emerson, Clarke.” Lexa finally admits, and it takes only a moment for Clarke’s eyes to widen and an even more saddened look to take over her face. Lexa shakes her head as if she still can’t believe it. Believe that he’s here. Believe what she’s been doing to him. “That’s the man who killed my parents.”

Before the brunette can say anything else, Clarke is pulling her into a tight embrace. The winter’s cold is chilling, but Clarke’s body warmth keeps her grounded and comfortable. The blonde’s breath is warm against the exposed skin of her neck before she speaks. “I’m so sorry, Lex.” Clarke says, and that is the last thing that Lexa expected her to say. She had expected her to yell at her for harming someone so defenseless. She expected something, but not this. “I’m so sorry, baby.” Clarke repeats herself. “Why didn’t you tell me? Why didn’t you let me know?”

Clarke, on the inside, knows that they have to talk about what’s happening with Carl in the garden shed, but right now all that she can think about is comforting Lexa. She knows that the taller girl is probably going through a lot, emotionally, right now and she wants to be here for her. She pulls away to get a better look at Lexa and that’s when her eyes catch sight of Lexa’s bloody hands again. Clarke moves to grab one of them, but Lexa retracts it and looks to Clarke apologetically. 

“I’m sorry that you had to see that, Clarke. I am, but this –“ Lexa looks back towards the shed for a moment before looking back to the beauty in front of her. “I had to do th – he deserves this –“ She attempts to speak further, but Clarke answers and surprises the hell out of her. 

“I know.” Clarke says softly, and brings a hand up to place against Lexa’s cheek and the brunette can’t help but lean into her touch. “I know he deserves it, Lex. He deserves so much worse.” Clarke’s thumb skims gently over Lexa’s bottom lip and then across her jawline. “But you can’t keep this up. This isn’t you, and if you continue, you will only hate yourself later.”

“But what do I –“ Lexa starts to argue, but Clarke shakes her head and retracts her hand from Lexa’s face. The both immediately miss the warmth of each other’s touch. 

“We hold him here.” Clarke starts. “We hold him here, but no one touches him. We can find other ways of making him talk. Of making him rat her out.”

“We?”

“Yes.” Clarke answers, and a small, sad smile forms on her face at the look of shock on Lexa’s. “I told you that I would do whatever I could to help you, and I will, but you can’t touch him again, alright?” Lexa nods. “And neither can Lincoln.” Lexa huffs but agrees to that as well.

“So, you’re not mad?” Lexa asks hesitantly, running her bloody hand through her hair and Clarke makes a gross face. 

“I’m not mad.” Clarke replies. “But that doesn’t mean that I’m okay with this. Can we just go home? It’s cold out here and we need to get you cleaned up.” Lexa nods once more, still in awe of Clarke Griffin. This woman should have hated her now. She should have went running as soon as she saw what Lexa was capable of, but she didn’t. She understands what Lexa’s going through, and she is still here to help her get by.   
To help her get through the day and the rest of this shit.

Clarke and Lexa make their way back towards the shed, hand in hand, where they spot Lincoln sitting outside on an old metal bench. When he spots them he stands up and his eyes dart down to their conjoined hands quickly before looking back to Lexa. “We’re headed home.” Lexa announces and Lincoln nods his head towards the tall woman. “You have your things? The shed will be a suitable place to stay?”

“Yeah, boss.” He replies. “I’ve got plenty of heaters and a cot and blankets in the bed of the truck.” He uses his thumb to point behind him. “Plenty of rations too.”

“Good.” Lexa says and she looks over to the shed. “None for him, though. Just water for now.”

“Sure thing, Lexa.”

“Call Raven if you need anything, and don’t let him out of your sight.” And with that, Lincoln smiles at Lexa and she and Clarke make their way to Clarke’s truck and back towards the house.

 

//

 

Clarke pulls up to her house and parks her truck in the garage before getting out to meet Lexa. Lexa had pulled in behind her in Raven’s vehicle that she had stolen earlier that day. The air of the night was thin and frigid, and Clarke could tell that the temperature was dropping rapidly. It’s dark out except for the porch light on the side of Clarke’s house. She can barely make out Lexa’s expression as she gets out of the vehicle. Her eyes scan slowly over Lexa’s tired body. The brunette closes the door of the car and walks towards Clarke and the house, too afraid to actually look the blonde in the eye.

“Hey.” Clarke says quietly as Lexa walks up to her. She takes one of the taller woman’s blood stained hands into her own and rubs her thumb over the top gently. Lexa looks to her and somehow everything seems to feel okay in that moment. “Are we –“ Clarke looks down at her feet for a split second before looking back to Lexa. “Are we okay?” She asks, and Lexa raises an eyebrow. “I mean – you seem like you just don’t want to be around now.”

Lexa steps forwards slowly and freezes her hand mid-air. She had started to caress Clarke’s cheek, but she had forgotten the dried blood that seemed to cover every each of them. Dropping her hand back to her side and looking deeper into Clarke’s blue eyes, she gives her a small, sad smile. “Of course – I mean – I should be asking you that, shouldn’t I?”

“Why do you say that?”

“Well –“ Lexa runs a hand through her hair nervously. “You sort of just saw me – in a very compromising position, Clarke.”

Clarke nods her head in understanding then and brings her other hand up to place it against the smooth, cold skin of Lexa’s neck. She can feel Lexa tense her muscles for a moment before relaxing again. It’s only been a few hours since they were this close, but it feels like an eternity. It feels like another lifetime ago. “I can’t say that I liked seeing it.” She replies honestly. “But that isn’t you.” Clarke continues, holding tightly onto Lexa so that she wouldn’t back away. “I know that that isn’t you. Quite honestly, I am surprised at the restraint that you showed.” Clarke shakes her head and lets out a nervous laugh. “I can’t imagine being put into that situation, Lexa. I can’t imagine going through anything that you’ve been through. You’re one of the strongest people that I’ve ever met, and I’m already a better person for knowing you.”

“Clarke.” Lexa says, shaking her head and Clarke doesn’t let go. “I just beat a man that –“

“That killed your parents. He killed your parents, Lex.” 

“I know.” The taller woman sighs, and Clarke can tell that she’s holding back tears. “And I was so upset about Finn finding out about me too. He’s terrified of me, Clarke.” She says, dropping her head to look at the ground. “One of the only people in this world that I lo –“ She catches herself. “One of the only people that I have ever been comfortable with is now scared of me. He thinks I’m a monster. He thinks I’m –“

“Stop.” Clarke interjects and Lexa looks up again. “Finn doesn’t think that, Lexa. I explained everything to him. He told me that he’s sorry and that he wants to talk to you and apologize.” Clarke shakes her head slightly with tears forming in her cerulean eyes. “He loves you.” Clarke says. “I – I know that.”

“He said that?” Clarke nods her head in answer. “I have to – I need to go take a shower.” Lexa said, stepping back from Clarke one step and wiping at her eyes. “And then I’ll talk with him.” Lexa grins, and Clarke returns it. The taller woman leans into place a soft kiss to Clarke’s forehead before pulling away. “Thank you.”

“For what?”

Lexa shrugs and squeezes Clarke’s hand tighter. “For being you.”

 

//

 

Clarke gives Lexa her space as the brunette takes a hot shower to wash the emotions of the day away from her. She’s been sitting with Octavia and Finn in the living room for the past half of an hour, patiently awaiting Lexa to return. Clarke knows how much Lexa and Finn care about one another, and she knows how hard each of them took the news of her son finding out earlier that day. 

She’s lost in her thoughts when she hears footsteps behind her. Clarke turns her head, slightly, to see Lexa standing there in a pair of sweat pants and a large hoodie. Her long, brown hair was clean and blow-dried and swept over to one shoulder. Clarke knew that she was more than likely grinning like an idiot, but she couldn’t help herself. Lexa looked gorgeous just the way that she was. It never matters what the other woman was wearing; she always manages to take Clarke’s breath away.

Lexa returns Clarke’s grin and then moves her eyes over towards the small boy sitting beside the blonde. Finn hasn’t yet noticed Lexa, so she decides to speak up. “Finn.” The young child spins his head around quickly and gives Lexa a sad smile before standing and walking around the couch to stand in front of her. “Hey, buddy.” She says quietly, as if they were the only two in the room. She kneels and looks him directly in the eyes, but refrains from putting her hand on his shoulder. “You think that we could talk for a minute?”

Finn nods his head, and turns to give his mother one last smile before grabbing Lexa’s hand and dragging her to his room. Clarke is sure to send Lexa a wink before she’s out of sight.

“They’re cute together.” Octavia’s voice pulls Clarke out of her thoughts, and she turns to look at her best friend with a smile that she can’t stop. 

“Yeah.” Clarke agrees. “They are, aren’t they?”

Octavia nods her head and spins on the couch so that she’s facing the blonde. “You two are too, you know?”

“What?”

“You and Lexa.” Octavia starts and shrugs her shoulders. “You guys are cute too. Sickeningly so, actually.”

Clarke lets out a small chuckle and slaps her friend’s shoulder. “We are not cute.”

“You are. Even Raven agrees.”

“She’s great.” The blonde sighs, and falls backwards onto the couch to face the ceiling. She closes her eyes and her mind is caught up in all things Lexa. Today had been a hard day for the brunette. It had been a hard day for Clarke too, to see all of that, but she knows that Lexa has had it rough. She knows all of the shit that she’s been through, and she’s not leaving Lexa to deal with it on her own. To be honest, Clarke can’t imagine her life without Lexa in it at all. And that… that is so fucking scary.

“Earth to Clarke.” Octavia’s voice brings her out of her thoughts again. Clarke sits up and raises and eyebrow at her friend. “You went all spacey on me there for a second.”

“Sorry.” Clarke grins and then plops back down, earning her a groan from the shorter girl beside her. “We are cute, aren’t we?”

 

//

 

“So,” Lexa starts in as she and Finn make their way into his bedroom and she sits softly on the side of his small bed. 

“I’m sorry.” The boy blurts out, almost startling Lexa and causing her eyes to widen at his outburst. He practically runs up to her and throws his arms around her neck, and this definitely takes her by surprise. “I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I’m sorry.”

She wraps her arms around him, and pulls him in tighter. “You have nothing to be sorry for, buddy.” She says softly. “I should have told you from the beginning. I shouldn’t have tried to keep such a secret from you.”

He pulls back to look at her, and she notices him wipe away a small tear. Finn is shaking his head slightly, as if he’s searching for the words to say. “You’re my best friend. I should have believed you when you said that what the TV said wasn’t true.”

Lexa has to admit, that hearing Finn say that she’s his best friend is one of the happiest moments of her laugh. A five-year-old telling her that… she laughs a little on the inside. “You’re my best friend too, kid.” 

She responds, placing a hand over onto his shoulder. “The whole world thinks that I’ve done some pretty horrible things, but I promise you that I haven’t. Someone very bad is trying to make it look like I did this.”

“Momma told me.”

“I’m sorry that you had to be drug into this.” Lexa says sadly as she squeezes his shoulders. “I never meant for any of this to happen.”

“It’s okay, Lex.” Finn says as he hugs her again. “I know you’re not bad. You’re really cool, actually. Like superhero cool.”

“Yeah?”

“Uh-huh. The coolest.” He smiles. “And nicest too.”

“Thanks, buddy. It means the world to me that you can forgive me for all of this, and that you believe me.”

“That’s what best friends do.” He shrugs like it’s the most obvious thing in the world. “I love you, Lex.” He adds before hugging her once more and then grabbing her by the hand to pull her towards the door. 

She smiles sweetly. “I love you too.”

“Now, let’s go eat some pizza!” 

 

//

 

“From the looks of it at dinner,” Clarke starts as she climbs into bed later on that night. “Your talk with Finn went pretty well.”

Lexa lays her cell phone down on the nightstand beside her and turns to look at Clarke with a wide smile. Clarke would be lying if she said that the sight didn’t make her feel things that she hasn’t felt in a long time. “It did.” Lexa replies and then laughs with a grunt when Clarke grins and plops her head down on her chest. “Thank you for today.” Lexa says, bringing her hand up to push blonde strands from blue eyes as they look up to her in question. “For coming to find me. For not giving up on me.”

“I will never give up on you, Lexa.” Clarke smiles. “You’ve got me in your corner for as long as you’ll let me stay here.”

Lexa brushes her fingers through long, golden locks and Clarke closes her eyes with a hum. “You’re unbelievable, you know that?”

“You’re one to talk.” Clarke responds and Lexa chuckles, causing Clarke to open her eyes and lift up her head. Her face in directly in front of Lexa, and she can see the look of question in her green eyes. “You are.”   
Clarke repeats herself. “You’re so incredible, and I can’t believe that I actually get to be with you, here, like this. Much less know you.”

Lexa looks at Clarke with, all that Clarke can call it is, love. Her heart flutters at the look of pure amazement in the forest-colored eyes in front of her. “There is literally nowhere else that I’d rather be.” Is all that Lexa can respond with, but it must be more than enough for Clarke because she leans in and places the softest of kisses to Lexa’s awaiting lips.

The kiss doesn’t last long at all, and Clarke laughs out loud at the pout on Lexa’s face when she pulls away. “You’ve had a long day, babe.” The blonde comments before placing another quick kiss to Lexa’s lips. “Get some rest. Tomorrow is Christmas Eve and we have so much to do.”

Lexa grins. Christmas Eve. Her first Christmas that she doesn’t have to spend behind bars in ten years. The thought that she gets to spend it with Clarke and Finn is just the icing on the cake. “Okay, okay.” She says as she reaches over to cut off the lamp. She turns back around and wraps her arms around Clarke tightly, bringing her as close as humanly possible. “I can’t wait to spend it with you and Finn.” She says into the darkness and she can feel Clarke’s lips smile against her collarbone. Clarke kiss her there before she starts to doze off.

“Goodnight, Lexa Woods.”

Lexa leans down and presses a kiss to the crown of Clarke’s head. “Night, baby.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well, what did you think? Let me know in the comments below. Love you guys to the moon and back. :)


	15. The Best Thing

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay... so, yeah. It's been a while. More than a while, actually. I am so terribly sorry. I'm just a horrible person for taking so many months away from my writing for you guys. I've had so much going on the past six months of my life. Like crazy stuff. To be honest, I didn't know if I'd continue writing. I have been dealing with some major relationship issues, and needless to say... I am now on my own once again. Haha. I assume that it's for the best, although I didn't see it that way a few months ago. So, I apologize once again for such a long hiatus. I hope you can all forgive me. It might be another little while before I update again (not nearly as long) because I am moving next week to Nashville. It's a big move and will definitely take some getting used to. Just bear with me, and I promise to finish this story.
> 
> So much happens in this chapter. Like... so much. I hope that it makes since and isn't as choppy as I think that it may be because of how long it took me to get back into the swing of things.

“Would you please stop pacing like that?” Raven groans as she faces all of her computer screens in the basement of Clarke’s house. Lexa has been down there for half an hour practically walking around in circles and it’s driving Raven insane. “You’re making me really fucking nervous.”

Lexa lets out an exasperated groan and plops down onto the sofa where Raven has been sleeping. “Hey!” Raven exclaims and turns to look at Lexa with a scowl. “Careful with the bed.”

The brunette on the couch throws her hands up in surrender and adjusts herself so that she’s not smashing Raven’s pillow with her ass. “Do you think that it’s enough?” Lexa asks her best friend, clearly referring to   
what she was pacing about just a few moments ago. “I mean, Clarke’s Christmas gift…”

“Are you seriously asking me this right now?” Raven asks as she scans her eyes over the screens once more. Her fingers are working over the keyboard quickly and Lexa has no idea what she’s looking for, but she trusts whatever Raven does. When Lexa doesn’t answer with anything other than another groan, Raven responds. “Yes, Woods. The hundreds of dollars worth of gifts that you bought for your girlfriend should be more than enough.” Lexa clicks her tongue and Raven continues. “Finn is going to be so pumped for all of the cool shit you got for him, too.”

Lexa has been shopping online, using one of her aliases, for the past two weeks. She wants to make sure that Clarke and Finn have the best Christmas and she has spared no expense on their gifts. She bought way too many pair of thick boot socks for Clarke. It’s sort of been an inside joke of theirs over the past couple of weeks. Lexa is always teasing the blonde about her very loud and colorful choice of winter socks. She will never admit to how much she actually adores them on Clarke. 

Lexa also bought Clarke a new KitchenAid mixer for her kitchen, because according to Finn, his mom has been wanting one for ages. She has ordered the world’s most top of the line art supplies. Several gorgeous necklaces, that are definitely Clarke’s style, and she’s also surprising the blonde and Finn with a Disney cruise for the two of them that coming up in the Spring. She knows that it’s all a little much, but Lexa can’t   
seem to help it. Or even care. She wants to give Clarke everything. Because, to her, Clarke is everything.

“You called Clarke my ‘girlfriend’.” Lexa states randomly as she stares at the back of her best friend’s head. Without turning back to Lexa, Raven just hums. “But, I mean - she’s not. Well - I actually don’t know what we are.” She stops and takes a deep breath, standing up from where she had been sitting on Raven’s makeshift bed. “I mean, of course I want her to be, but -”

“Are you talking to me?” The Latina girl asks, turning to face the other rambling woman. “What are you going on about, Woods?”

Lexa lets out a loud huff and rolls her eyes. “I guess I am just talking to myself, really.” She shrugs. “These past few days with Clarke have been -”, She smiles to herself before finishing that statement. “Amazing.”   
Queue Raven’s faux gagging. Lexa ignores her entirely. “She’s so fucking perfect, Ray.”

“So you’ve said.”

“I mean - do you think that it would be juvenile to ask her to, you know…”, Lexa looks nervous and Raven starting grinning because she knows what’s coming. “Be my girlfriend?” Raven does, eventually, start   
laughing and Lexa walks over specifically to smack her in the back of the head. “I’m serious, you asshole.”

“I know, I know.” Her friend gasps between laughter. “I’m just fucking with you, Woods. I don’t really think that it’s juvenile. If you have to have a label on it, then you should just ask her.” Lexa looks unsure. “Lexa -” Raven sighs. She never calls her friend by her first name, so Lexa is sure to pay attention. “I’ve seen the way that Clarke looks at you. The way that she acts around you. She watches you with   
Finn, and I swear that her pupils turn into little hearts. I think that, at this point, you could ask her to run away with you to the ends of the Earth and she would follow you.”

Lexa can’t help but grin. Is that really how Clarke looks at her? She understands the feeling. She is sure that she looks at Clarke the same way. “You really think that it won’t like - freak her out?”

“Woods. Enough.” Raven says, jumping up from her seat and grabbing her friend’s shoulders. “Shut the fuck up and just go do it.” She says, pushing Lexa towards the staircase. “And leave me the hell alone. I need to concentrate to work my magic.”

“Fine, fine.” Lexa huffs, spinning and stepping onto the second step. “Thanks, Reyes.”

“Yeah, yeah.”

 

//

 

When Lexa makes it up the stairway and into the living room, she notices that Finn is outside playing in the snow by himself. She watches him closely. She loves the way that his entire face lights up when he smiles or laughs. Even being outside and alone, he is having a blast, and Lexa suddenly wishes that she had a camera. He is so cute, that she can’t stand it. She continues to make her way through the room when she sees Octavia and Clarke sitting on the bar stools in the kitchen. The pair seem to be into a deep conversation and Lexa’s eyes go immediately to Clarke’s face. The blonde hasn’t noticed her presence yet, but Lexa can see a faint blush start to make it’s way over Clarke’s face. There is a hint of a grin there from something that Octavia just said to her. Lexa is very curious to know what it was.

After another few seconds of watching Clarke and Octavia speaking, Lexa decides to continue into the kitchen. She still doesn’t know Clarke’s opinion on PDA in front of her friend, so Lexa doesn’t touch her. Even though she is practically dying to feel the warmth of Clarke’s skin against her own.

“Hey.” Clarke says quietly, grinning in Lexa’s direction as the taller woman opens the refrigerator to grab a bottle of water.  
Lexa can’t help but to smile back, because Clarke’s smile is infectious. “Hey, yourself.” She looks over to Octavia and nods her head in the girl’s direction. “Octavia.”

“Woods.” The shorter of the women responds. 

Lexa and Octavia hear Clarke click her tongue and they see her roll her eyes. “Can you two please be a little more civil towards each other?”

“I’m civil.” Octavia says with a shrug of her shoulders. “I’m still just trying to get used to all of this, Clarke. I was still processing that a fugitive was living here with my best friend and her son…” She looks to Lexa with apologetic eyes because she doesn’t really think that of the taller woman anymore, but still… “And now, you are sleeping together.”

Lexa’s eyes widen almost comically and so do the blonde’s beside her. “We - umm - we aren’t sleeping together.” Lexa responds quietly. 

“That doesn’t change anything, O.” Clarke answers, trying to ignore what Lexa had just said. She’s very aware that they haven’t slept together and it’s starting to be rather frustrating, to say the least. “Lexa’s a good person and you know that. I don’t see why the two of you can’t just get along.”

“Clarke,” Lexa starts. “It’s fine. Octavia has her reasons.”

“No. It’s not fine.” This surprisingly came from Octavia and Lexa and Clarke’s eyes both search the smaller woman’s face. “I’m sorry, Woods. I do believe you and think that you’re a good person, but it’s still just going to take a little more time.” She looks over at her best friend and then back to Lexa. “Okay?” Lexa nods with a small grin, making a step closer to Clarke. “Okay. Good. I will go play with Finn so that the two of you can - you know - have some time together.” And with that, she’s up off of her bar stool and making her way out of the backdoor. 

Lexa watches her and lets out loud huff of air that she didn’t know that she had been holding in when Clarke’s hand grips at her hoodie. She looks down at where the blonde sits on the stool and finally turns to face her. “Hi.” Clarke smiles, bringing her other hand to Lexa’s hoodie and pulling her in close.

“Hey.”

“How are things going down there?” Clarke asks, nodding her head in the direction of the basement door. 

Lexa shrugs and brings one hand down to grab Clarke’s and entangle their fingers together. “About the same.” She answers. “Lincoln says that Emerson still won’t talk. So, that’s still a dead end. I really do need to go and talk to him again.”

Clarke shakes her head ‘no’. “I don’t think that that’s a great idea, babe. You didn’t do too much talking last time, from what I saw. Plus, it’s Christmas Eve. You should be here with us.”

Lexa sighs. Clarke’s right. She’s always right. “I know.”

“Hey.” Clarke says softly, standing up but not untangling her hand with Lexa’s. “What is it?”

“I just wish that I was able to go with you to your art gala thing tonight.” The taller woman pouts, and Clarke chuckles.

“Oh, Lex.” Clarke responds, bringing her free hand to Lexa’s face and running her thumb over her deliciously plump lower lip. “I know. I wish you could, too. But you know that it’s too big of a risk. Plus, you won’t be missing much anyways.”

“Bullshit.” Lexa breathes. “You art, from what I’ve seen of it, is extraordinary. It takes my breath away.” Lexa grins. “Just like you do.”

Clarke’s grin is wide and she finally releases her hold on Lexa’s hand and brings both of her hands to the back of the brunette’s neck. “You -” Clarke starts with a breathy chuckle. “Are such the charmer, Lexa Woods.”

Lexa laughs and places her hands on Clarke’s waist. “I’m not trying to be charming, Clarke.” And Clarke would be lying if she said that hearing Lexa say her name that way didn’t send a jolt of heat straight to her core. “That’s just the truth.” Lexa catches Clarke’s eyes dropping to her lips and she grins before leaning the rest of the way in. Closing the distance between them.

Clarke hums in appreciation when Lexa’s lips are finally on her own. Her hands immediately tighten around the brunette’s neck, trying to pull her even closer. Lexa is all too happy to oblige. Her grip on Clarke’s waist does not loosen and she presses the blonde up against the counter. Clarke seems just as eager as Lexa if the blonde’s tongue slipping into her mouth is any indication. Lexa happily let’s Clarke in and they both moan as their tongues meet. 

They part, but only for a second so that they can change angles. Lexa’s nose brushes over Clarke’s and they both smile as their lips meet again. Lexa loves kissing Clarke. She loves her life here and now with Clarke and Finn. She loves Clarke. She does. So much. She has to tell her. Lexa knows that it’s terrifyingly early, but she doesn’t care. Her feelings are not going to change. She can only hope that Clarke feels the same way. 

Lexa uses her arm strength and lifts Clarke up onto the counter. This earns her a surprised gasp from the blonde, and she can’t help but smile back into their kiss. “Shut up.” Clarke groans, her lips barely leaving Lexa’s to speak. Lexa’s hands move from Clarke’s waist down to her thighs where the brunette pushes them apart so that she can stand in between them and closer to her girl. Lexa’s hands make their way from Clarke’s thighs and up to Clarke’s abdomen and beyond. Her hands grasp at both of Clarke’s rest when they get there. Gripping and kneading like if she were to let go, they would disappear. Clarke doesn’t seem to be complaining, though. If her moans are anything to go by. 

Lexa’s lips move from Clarke’s mouth to her jaw and then to her neck, where she will definitely make some marks. “Lex…” Clarke groans. “No marks. My dress…” Lexa actually growls when she remembers Clarke’s dress that she is wearing to her gala tonight. She assumes the blonde is right. She shouldn’t leave marks.

For some reason, this sets Lexa off. After she growls once more, her hands pulls on the material of Clarke’s flannel button-up shirt and the buttons start to pop off and fly everywhere. “Lexa!” Clarke gasps, but laughs when Lexa couldn’t seem to care less. The brunette’s mouth moves further south and over the mounds of flesh where Lexa’s hands had just been. She makes a strange noise when she’s met with Clarke’s bra. Almost as if she had forgotten what a bra was. Luckily, Clarke’s bra unfastens in the front between her breasts, and Lexa wastes no time in removing the offending garment.

“Oh - fuck…” Clarke sighs, when Lexa finally takes a stiff nipple into her mouth and sucks. One of her hands fly to Lexa’s head and she arches her back into the brunette’s mouth. If only to feel more of her. After attending to both of Clarke’s breasts, Lexa’s mouth makes it way back up her neck, to her jaw and to her mouth once more. Clarke is almost out of breath, so she has to pull her mouth away for a moment. She rests her forehead against Lexa’s and she is met with the green of the brunette’s eyes staring straight into her soul. She leans in to peck at Lexa’s lips once more and she feels Lexa’s hands at the waistband of her sweatpants. 

“Clarke…” Lexa breathes out as Clarke leans back in to kiss her hard. Lexa pulls back and stares at her once more. Both of their eyes have darkened. “I want you.” Lexa admits softly, as her hands start to tug at Clarke’s pants. Clarke grabs one of Lexa’s hands and shoves it down under the waistband of her pants and her underwear. Lexa lets out a very audible gasp at what she finds there. Clarke is soaked, and Lexa has never been so turned on in her life. 

“I want you, too.” Clarke replies, but it’s hard to concentrate with Lexa’s fingers moving through her wet folds. “We - uh - we…”

“What is it?” Lexa asks, worried that she’s doing something wrong.

“Bedroom.” Clarke finally manages. “We’re in the kitchen.” She grins when a light switch seems to go off in Lexa’s head. A complete feeling of lust had taken over the brunette and she had completely forgotten that they were, in fact, in the middle of the kitchen.

“Right.” Lexa says, reluctant to take her hand out of Clarke’s pants. She lifts the blonde up once more and kisses away the gasp that Clarke emits. She doesn’t set her down, but carries her straight down the hallway, practically kicking open Clarke’s bedroom door.

Clarke laughs when Lexa practically throws her down onto the bed and walks back to make sure that the bedroom door is, in fact, locked. When Lexa turns around, Clarke has already taken off her unbuttoned shirt and slipped her bra all the way off. Lexa is sure that she is drooling, but doesn’t even care. It’s been so long, and the fact that it’s happening with Clarke, makes it so much more. 

Lexa loses her shirt on the walk back over to the bed. She starts to unbuckle her belt, until Clarke stops her. “Uh uh…” The blonde says softly. “Let me.” Reaching out, Clarke grabs onto the waistband of Lexa’s pants and pulls her closer. Lexa most definitely does not complain. Clarke works quickly on the brunette’s belt and unfastens the button as well. She jerks them down Lexa’s long, toned legs. God. Lexa is perfect.

Before her pants are even fully off, Lexa starts pulling down Clarke’s sweatpants. Clarke is left in nothing but her underwear, and Lexa in her sports bra and panties. The brunette crawls up Clarke’s body, pushing the blonde back onto the bed. “God.” Lexa says, almost out of breath. She leans down to press a kiss to Clarke’s mouth. “You’re so beautiful.” Her hands go back down to Clarke’s breasts and Clarke chuckles softly. Lexa gives her a questioning look.

“You have a thing for my boobs, don’t you?”

Lexa rolls her eyes and kisses Clarke again. “How could I not? They’re-” Lexa leans down and takes one of the objects of her affections into her mouth and sucks before letting go with a pop. “Perfect.”

It’s Clarke’s turn to roll her eyes, but she can’t stop the smile from spreading on her face. She reaches up and quickly assists Lexa in removing her own sports bra. Lexa’s breasts are quite a bit smaller than   
Clarke’s, but Clarke loves them just as much as Lexa loves her’s. 

They take their time with each other, still getting to know each others’ bodies. Once Lexa is sure that she has kissed every inch of Clarke, she grabs for the blonde’s underwear. Her green eyes look up to meet cerulean ones. “Are you - is this okay?” The fact that Lexa is still thinking about Clarke’s comfort, melts her heart and she leans up to places a small kiss the the brunette’s mouth. 

“I want you, Lex.” Clarke says softly against her lips. She kisses her again. “I want it to be you.” She doesn’t know who it is, it could be both of them, but someone is shaking. The nerves are getting the better of the two of them. It’s been five years since Clarke has slept with anyone, and ten years for Lexa. Nerves are probably extremely normal in this sort of situation, right?

Lexa finally manages to rid Clarke of her panties and she kisses her way down the blonde’s stomach. Every kiss causes shivers to run through both of their bodies. She makes her way down and then she can smell Clarke’s arousal, and it doesn’t nothing but cause her own to grow. She places her hands on Clarke’s thighs, and slowly pushes them apart, not that she really had to. Clarke is more than happy to open them. Lexa lies down in between the spread legs in front of her. Her eyes go straight to the blonde’s core. She chances one small glance back up to Clarke where she receives a small smile and a nod. Lexa leans to the side, placing a soft kiss the pale thigh beside her and then she moves her mouth to where Clarke needs her most.

At first contact, Clarke almost bucks off of the bed, but Lexa’s strong arms hold her thighs down. The brunette’s tongue is mapping out the new territory before her. Up. Down. Side to side. She doesn’t realize it, but she’s teasing Clarke and the blonde thinks that she might actually die. “Lex -” Clarke gasps. Her breath is uneven and almost chaotic. Lexa’s tongue is still charting it’s way through Clarke’s folds and she doesn’t think that she’s ever tasted something so perfect. “Baby, pleas - oh fuck!” Clarke practically yells when Lexa’s lips finally wrap around her swollen clit and her hands shoot out to grab at the sheets beneath them. Lexa would almost chuckle if she weren’t feeling exactly what the blonde was feeling in this moment. “Yes - shit.” Clarke has no idea what she’s saying. Nothing coherent comes to her mind at all.

Lexa continues working her tongue throughout Clarke’s core, alternating that and licking and sucking at the blonde’s clit. Clarke, above her, is a writhing mess. She’s almost there, Lexa knows this, but she needs something else. “Lexa - pl - please.” Clarke says through her choppy breathing. 

“What is it, Clarke?” Lexa asks, barely removing her mouth from Clarke. “What do you need?”

“You.” Clarke answers. “Plea - just you. Inside.” Lexa does chuckle then, but Clarke does not catch it. Lexa moves back down and continues her torturous ministrations on Clarke with her mouth, but this time, she brings a finger to the blonde’s entrance and slowly pushes inside. It seems to take Clarke’s breath away as she arches her back up off of the bed. Lexa works her finger in and out of Clarke while her mouth focuses on Clarke’s clit. After a few moments, she adds another and starts pumping in and out of Clarke harder. If Clarke was a mess before, she’s a wreck now. One hand has flown to lock into the long brown hair sitting between her legs. The other is grasping at her own breast, and her moaning is becoming louder as she gets closer. In the back of her mind, she knows that she should be more quiet. They aren’t alone, after all. But she can’t manage to do that. 

After a few more powerful thrusts inside her, by the long slender fingers of her lover, Clarke comes after Lexa sucks harder on her aching clit. The blonde’s back arches even further off of the bed and her mouth opens in a near silent scream. Her fingers are locked tighter into Lexa’s hair while the brunette continues to pump her fingers in and out, attempting to prolong her lover’s orgasm. Another minute or so goes by and Lexa finally removes her fingers from Clarke and moves up to kiss her. They kiss for a while, enjoying the feeling of being against each other for a moment. Clarke is worn out, as is Lexa for that matter. Lexa pulls away with a smirk and Clarke raises a brow in question. Lexa moves her own fingers up to her mouth and sucks them free of Clarke’s juices. Clarke groans when she feels another shot of arousal go straight down to her core. She brings a hand up and grasps onto the back of Lexa’s neck, pulling her down for a bruising kiss. 

“God.” Clarke pants, pulling away once more and dropping her head back to the bed. “That was - fuck - that was amazing.”

Lexa chuckles and leans down to kiss the blonde’s nose before rolling off of her to lie down beside her. “Amazing, huh?”

“I don’t like your smugness.” Clarke jokes. “But yes. It was so good.” She turns to her side to look directly at Lexa. “You were amazing.”

Lexa smiles and leans forward to kiss Clarke again. She doesn’t think that she will ever get used the feeling of Clarke’s lips on her own. It’s almost like an out-of-body experience. “I’m glad I didn’t forget how.” 

She smiles again against Clarke’s lips. “Like riding a bike.” Lexa jokes, causing Clarke to laugh out loud. They lie there and watch each other for a few more minutes. Getting lost in each other’s eyes. Clarke reaches over to intertwine her fingers with Lexa’s. 

“I believe it’s your turn.” She smiles tiredly before rolling to straddle the brunette beside her. Her hands immediately find their resting place on Lexa’s breasts and Lexa moans at first contact. She swears that she could probably come just from Clarke touching her boobs. She’s that turned on. Plus, it’s been ten years for God’s sake.

Lexa grins and leans up on her elbows to kiss Clarke passionately, while Clarke’s fingers start to jerk down the brunette’s underwear. “Show me what you got.” Lexa jokes, and Clarke does not disappoint.

 

//

 

Clarke wakes before Lexa does. The pair had passed out after another round. 

Okay.. two more rounds. 

I mean, can you blame them? 

The blonde leans over to place a soft kiss on Lexa’s forehead before rolling out of the bed quietly and making her way to the ensuite. She has to take a shower and get ready for the gala this evening, and as much as she would rather stay in bed for the rest of the day with a very naked Lexa, she knows that she needs to do this. 

She turns the shower on hot and waits for the water to turn so. It’s not long before the bathroom is filled with steam and mirror is fogged over. Clarke makes her way into the shower and immediately lets the water run over her blonde hair. She runs her fingers through her hair, scraping her scalp as she goes. She closes her eyes and let’s the water soothe her. She smiles to herself thinking about everything that has happened in the past couple of hours. 

Clarke has to admit that she has been wanting sex for a while now. She’s only human. But having it be with Lexa was something more than she could have ever hoped for. She’s in love, again. She’s in love with Lexa and she can’t wipe the grin off of her face as the water cascades down around her. 

“What are you smiling about?” A familiar voice startles her, and she turns around to see that Lexa has entered the shower without her knowing. Her smile never fades as she throws her arms around Lexa’s neck. 

“You.” Clarke responds softly before placing a kiss to the brunette’s lips. “Us.” She says, pulling back to look at Lexa’s gorgeous green eyes. 

Lexa smiles simply. “Us.” She repeats herself. She likes the way that rolls off of her tongue. “So… there is an us?” She asks and it was probably the wrong thing to ask because she sees Clarke’s face fall a bit. 

“What do you mean?” Clarke inquires. 

Lexa pulls her closer, even though she can sort of feel the blonde pulling away. “I just - I don’t know - what do you want us to be?” Lexa asks, and Clarke continues to stare at her. “I just mean that we haven’t really talked about what we are - to each other.” It’s obvious to Clarke that Lexa is very nervous having this conversation, and she wonders if she should be nervous too. Does Lexa just want something casual? She might not even want to be in a relationship and at this thought, Clarke’s heart sinks to her stomach.

“What do you want us to be to each other?” The blonde responds, and she’s honestly terrified of the answer. 

“I don’t want this to sound juvenile.” Lexa starts nervously, but she grins when she gets lost in Clarke’s blue eyes again. “But - I want you to be my girlfriend. I want us to be - girlfriends.” At this, Clarke lets out a breath that she didn’t realize that she was holding. Her body relaxes and so does Lexa’s when she sees the smile on the blonde’s face. 

“It’s not juvenile.” Clarke replies sweetly, making Lexa’s worries disappear. “I was so hoping that that’s what you wanted, too.”

“Yeah?”

“Of course.” Clarke smiles. “I want nothing more than to be your girlfriend, Lexa Woods. I know that things might get complicated, but we will work through them together. I will do anything for you.”

Lexa grins from ear to ear, and even underneath the falling water of the shower head, she feels a tear escape. She’s glad that Clarke’s can’t see it because she’s cried enough in front of the blonde over the past few days. Words start to make their way up her throat, and before she can even think about holding them back, they are out. “I love you.”

“You - what?” Clarke gasps, not sure that she heard Lexa right. She couldn’t have said what she thinks that she said, right? Lexa couldn’t possibly feel the way that Clarke feels about her. Not so soon. 

Lexa chuckles nervously, but she’s never been so sure about anything in her life. “I love you.” She repeats a bit louder and brings her hand up to cup Clarke’s cheek. “I know that it’s soon - like really soon, but… God, Clarke.” She shakes her head like she can’t believe that she’s saying this again. “I love you. I’ve never felt this way about anyone. I never thought that I would feel this way and out of nowhere, you broke down the walls of my heart and made a home there. I don’t think that I will ever be able to envision a life without you in it. And Finn. I love him so much. He’s perfect and you made him that way. You’re the best mom and that’s just one of the many reasons why I love you.” Okay, she’s pretty sure that she has maxed out her quota of ‘I love yous’ for the day. But who is she kidding… she would shout it a million times from the rooftop. She loves Clarke Griffin.

Clarke’s not sure when she started crying, but Lexa starts to wipe at her cheeks like she can see the tears there. All of those words. She’s never heard anything like that before. She never thought that someone would ever love her like that, and Finn as well. Her heart is pounding out of her chest, and she is glad that Lexa is holding her because she thinks that she might collapse under the weight of everything. “I - I love you, too.” She finally manages, bringing her hand to Lexa’s neck and crashing her lips against the brunette’s. She’s crying and she has to break for air, but she doesn’t pull back far. “God. I love you so fucking much it hurts, Lexa. I never imagined falling in love with anyone else in my lifetime, but here you are and I’ve never fallen so hard. From the moment that you broke into my house, you broke into my heart. I knew it then.” She continues, shaking her head as she laughs to herself. “Your eyes, sucked me in that night and I’ve never gotten back out. And I don’t want to.” She kisses Lexa again. “I know that Finn loves you, too. He adores you and I know that you adore him. They way you are with him makes me love you even more if that’s possible.”

They both stare at each other for a moment. Not sure what to do now other than kiss each other until their lips are swollen and bruised. So, that’s what they do. “I love you.” Lexa says again against Clarke’s lips, loving the way that the words taste on her tongue. 

Clarke chuckles against Lexa’s lips and kisses her again. “I love you.”

 

//

 

After another twenty minutes or so in the shower, Clarke has to reluctantly pull herself away from Lexa in order to get ready for the art gala. Her cheeks and jaw were hurting from smiling so hard at a constant rate and she doesn’t think that her heart has slowed down since those three little words slipped out of her girlfriend’s mouth. 

Nothing little about those three words at all.

Octavia makes her way into Clarke’s bedroom to help the blonde get ready for her big night. She curls Clarke’s long, golden hair into looser girls that cascade over her shoulders, and she keeps her makeup light.   
The shorter woman throws a pair of diamond earrings on her best friend’s ears and steps back to look at her with a grin. 

Clarke’s wearing a high-waisted, floor-length silver sequined skirt and a deep red wine colored long sleeve blouse. The top is dipped at the neckline just slightly so. A passerby would just assume that it was a dress and not a two piece ensemble. The diamond earrings that Octavia added, look amazing with the skirt and so do two of Clarke’s sparkling rings. Octavia lets out a wolf whistle at Clarke and embarrasses her even though there is no one around. “Oh hush, you.” Clarke retorts and a blush takes over her face.

“For real, Clarke.” Octavia responds with a chuckle. “You look fucking amazing!”

“Thanks, O.” Clarke grins shyly. She’s not used to being dressed up. Especially this dressed up and to be quite honest, she’s not that comfortable looking this was. She would much rather be in a pair of skinny jeans and a shirt. “I’m so glad that you’re coming with me. I don’t know what I would do if you weren’t coming.”

Octavia jumps off of the bathroom counter, where she was sitting, and chuckles. “Of course I’m going with you, Clarke.” The shorter woman pulls the blonde into a light hug. “I wouldn’t miss this. Especially on   
Christmas Eve.”

Clarke lets out a sigh. “I still wish that this wasn’t happening on Christmas Eve. I should be here with Finn and with -” She makes a minute pause and glances at her friend who is grinning at her like a cheshire cat. 

“Clarke - come on.” Octavia teases. “I’m not an idiot. And you two weren’t exactly quiet earlier.” At this admission, Clarke turns the same shade as her blouse. She didn’t think that they were being that loud. She was trying so hard to be as quiet as possible, but clearly that didn’t work in her favor.

The blonde looks down at her feet nervous and chuckles. This would happen to her. God only knows that Raven probably heard too, and now Lexa is getting an earful from her best friend. “She told me she loved me.” Clarke says, deciding to completely ignore the sex talk with her best friend for now.

Octavia’s eyes go wide and she slowly brings her hand up to her mouth in shock. To her and everybody else, it is extremely obvious that Clarke and Lexa have some sort of connection, but she hadn’t realized that it was this deep. “Wh - I mean, what did you say?”

“I told her that I loved her too.” Clarke shrugs. “Because I do.” She adds when Octavia continues looking at her with a funny expression. “God, O. She said the sweetest most genuine things to me. We both cried.   
She kept going on about why she loved me and that she knew it was soon, but she couldn’t help herself.” Clarke smiles and continues. “She talked about how much she loves Finn.” A dreamy sigh escapes her lips before Octavia quickly wraps her arms around her best friend.

“I’m so happy for you.” Octavia says into her friend’s shoulder. “This is so great.”

Clarke can’t help it, she pushes at her friend softly to look her in her eyes. “What? Are you sick?” The blonde teases.

“No, asshole.” Octavia replies. “I’m just - I can tell how much you love her. It’s so obvious, and although it is still taking me some getting used to, I am so happy that you have someone like that in your life again.”   
A kind smile. “You and Finn both deserve the world.” Clarke grins widely and wraps her arms back around her best friend. 

“You don’t know how good it is to hear you say that.”

“Yeah, well -” The shorter woman starts. “If she hurts either of you, I’m turning her ass in.”

 

//

 

Lexa and Finn are in the living room putting together a new puzzle that Lexa had gotten for him. Raven is down in the basement working on yet another lead that Nyko had sent to her a couple of hours earlier. So far, all of the ones that he has sent her have been duds and she and Lexa both are becoming more and more nervous with each passing day that they can’t come up with something. Anything. Some little shred of hope to make them want to continue on. 

In all honesty, though, Lexa already has a reason to want to work harder and continue on. Well, two reasons actually and one of them in sitting cross-legged in front of her smiling as he finds another piece of the puzzle that fits. “Good job, buddy.” She grins. “You’re getting way too good at these things. I’m going to have to start getting you the 500 pieces ones.”

“No!” Finn shrieks, causing Lexa to laugh loudly. “That’s way too many. My brain can’t hold that much information.”

“I highly doubt that.”

He places another piece and looks up at Lexa. “Maybe you’re right.” He grins. “I am pretty smart.”

“You are, indeed.” Lexa replies, smiling at the five-year-old once more and looking back down to the puzzle to help him out. “So, are you excited that Santa Claus is coming tonight?”

“Heck yes!” He practically yells and jumps up as if he had forgotten all together that Christmas is tomorrow and Lexa had just reminded him. “I hope that you like your present that I got you.” 

Lexa makes a curious face with the raise of an eyebrow. “You got me a present?”

“I made one.”

“You made one, huh?” She teases. “So, I’m assuming that you have some amazing hidden talents like your mother’s art?”

He shakes his head ‘no’ furiously. “I’m not near as good as mom, but I try.”

“I’m sure that you’re very talented at everything you do, kid.”

“Thanks, Lex.” Finn replies, before his eyes focus on something behind the brunette in front of him. His smile widens and he jumps up, startling Lexa. “Mom!” He exclaims, running around the puzzle in the floor and towards his blonde-haired mother. She opens her arms wide for him, and squats so that she can hug him.

“Hey, buddy.” She says softly, kissing the top of his mop of brown hair. 

“Wow, Mama!” He grins and eyes her outfit up and down as she stands back up. He’s never seen his mother dressed up like this before. “You look like a princess, except better!” This causes Clarke to laugh and Octavia comes out from the hallway at about the same time, so she hears the statement as well.

“Your mom cleans up pretty nice, huh?” The shorter, black-haired woman states and Finn only nods his head and smiles before turning to look at Lexa who is just standing up from where she was sitting with Finn earlier. Lexa turns around and her eyes immediately go comically wide. 

Finn laughs, because clearly he notices his new best friend’s wide eyes. “Doesn’t mama look pretty?” He asks towards Lexa. The brunette can only nod her head ‘yes’ as she slowly walks towards the two new people in her life. The biggest parts of her life, now. When she gets up next to Finn, standing in front of Clarke, she doesn’t really know how to react. She knows how she wants to react. Lexa wants to pick Clarke up into her arms and kiss her senseless, but she’s not sure that that would be something that Clarke would want Finn to see so soon.

Lexa smiles warmly at Clarke as her hand finds purchase on Finn’s tiny shoulder beside her. “Wow.” Lexa practically whispers and her hand squeezes a bit where it rests on the five-year-old. Her eyes never leave   
Clarke’s and the blonde is clearly blushing, but Lexa makes no comment about the fact. “You look amazing.”

“Thank you.” Clarke replies softly and grins. It’s a grin that Lexa recognizes that Clarke reserves for her only, and she absolutely adores it. As if her heart wasn’t a big gay puddle in the middle of her chest already, that grin does the trick. Three words are on the tip of the brunette’s tongue, but she refrains since they are in the presence of Clarke’s son and her best friend. It might not be the best time for that. That would be yet another conversation that she and Clarke would have to have with Finn.

They must stare at each other for a moment too long, because after a little bit Octavia clears her throat from behind Clarke and speaks to Finn. “Ummm - Finn, tell your mom ‘bye’ and show me what you’re working on over here.” She gestures towards the puzzle laying in the middle of the floor. Octavia’s not stupid. She knows that the two lovebirds will want a moment alone before Clarke leaves for the gala. 

Finn hugs his mother again and tells her to have fun. Clarke kisses him on his forehead and asks him to be good for Lexa and Raven while she and Octavia are gone for a few hours. Clarke and Lexa walk towards the door that opens up to the covered garage, where Lexa has Clarke’s vehicle already warming up for her girlfriend’s journey into town. Lexa pulls the blonde closer to her, once the pair is finally out of view of the little one. She grins and kisses Clarke softly on the lips and the shorter woman is quick to reciprocate. Lexa pulls back and looks Clarke up and down once more. Clarke would be embarrassed by the way that Lexa is ogling her if it didn’t turn her on so much. Clarke groans internally, wishing that she could just stay here for the rest of the evening.

“Seriously, Clarke.” Lexa says quietly. “You are so fucking beautiful.” Clarke turns a deep shade of red and smiles softly before leaning up to give Lexa another peck on the lips. The blonde wraps her arms around the taller woman’s neck and brings her closer, changing the angle of their kiss. Their noses brush against each other and they both smile.

“I love you.” Lexa’s heart is pounding out of her chest once more at the sound of those three words coming from Clarke’s mouth. Lexa almost forgets that she should probably respond. She has just been standing there staring, open-mouthed. 

“God.” The brunette exhales. “I love you, too. So much.” She chuckles a bit.

Clarke grins as her hands play with the tiny baby hairs on Lexa’s neck. “What’s funny?”

“Nothing.” Lexa replies. “I just still can’t believe all of this.” She gestures between she and Clarke and then around the house. “This is all - you’re perfect and I’ve never -” Lexa struggles for the words. No words can come to her mind with the way that Clarke’s eyes look into her own. They entrance her each and every time that they meet. “I just never would have expected for any of this to happen and I definitely wouldn’t have expected to ever fall this madly in love with someone.” Clarke kisses her again, but they both hear Octavia telling Finn that she has to leave, so they pull away from each other’s lips. 

“Just -” Clarke starts in and shakes her head. She gives Lexa another quick peck on her soft full lips and smiles warmly. “Just believe it, okay?” The blonde says. “I know that this is a lot right now, but this -” She gestures between the two of them like Lexa had only a moment ago. “This is real. I know it.” Another smile. “ Now I’m going to go to my art gala and come home to tuck my sweet boy into sleep on Christmas Eve night, and then I’m going to pile into bed with the most beautiful woman I’ve ever seen and tell her how much I love her before we make love and fall asleep together.”

Lexa smirks at Clarke and the blonde blushes a tiny amount. That damn smirk will get her every fucking time. “Make love, huh?” Clarke rolls her eyes and slaps the brunette on her shoulder.

“Is that all that you took away from that?”

Lexa chuckles and kisses Clarke once more when she sees Octavia walking up behind her friend. “Definitely not.” She pushes a strand of hair back behind Clarke’s ear. “Have a great night, Clarke. You deserve all of the praise that you are going to get. Finn and I will be waiting for you when you get back.”

Clarke can only smile before Octavia is pushing her out of the door and yelling her own ‘goodbye’ to Lexa. Lexa heart melts once more as she watches the car back out of the driveway and she feels a small hand wrap around her own and sees Clarke waving goodbye to both her and the small boy to her side. 

This is what life is supposed to be about. This is what love is.

 

//

 

“What does this button do?” Finn asks excitedly as he practically bounces in his seat next to Raven in the basement. Raven turns around and glares at Lexa who is laughing at her best friend’s exasperated look.   
Finn had practically gotten down on his knees and begged Lexa to let him go into Raven’s ‘lair’ for a little while to look at all of the Latina woman’s ‘cool gadgets’. Needless to say, Raven was not that happy to have a five-year-old around hundreds of thousands of dollars worth of her equipment. ‘Nervous’ isn’t a strong enough word to describe how she’s feeling at the moment.

“That -” Raven replies to the boy, softly swatting his hand away from her control panel. “Turns my scanner on.”

Finn looks even more curious now and Lexa already knows what’s coming… More questions. She laughs again before the young boy even has a chance to ask the next one. Cue another faux glare from   
Raven. “What’s a scanner?”

“A scanner let’s me hear all of the chatter on the police radios.”

“Chatter?”

Raven let’s out a sigh as her eyes continue to search over her screens in front of her. “Yeah. It let’s me hear everything that the cops are saying.”

Finn looks a little confused until his eyes widen a little more and he looks so proud of himself. “About Lexa?”

“Exactly.”

There are just a couple of moments of silence before the boy starts again. “Have you found the bad guys yet?”

Raven turns around and gives Lexa another look before answering. “I’m not necessarily trying to find the bad guys. I’m trying to find clues about the bad things that the bad guys did.” Lexa smiles, loving the way that Raven is trying to ‘dumb’ down her words for the young Finn. She’s still a little skeptical about him knowing about all of this stuff. He’s only five for God’s sake, but for now she will let him asks his questions.

“How come you don’t help, Lex?” He asks, turning around to look at his mother’s girlfriend. Lexa squeezes her hand softly around his shoulder and smiles. 

“Raven doesn’t want me messing up anything.” Lexa replies and Finn laughs. “Hey - don’t make fun.” Lexa joins in his laughter, as does Raven. “I can’t help it that I’m not good at working technology.” This only causes Finn to laugh harder, so Lexa picks him up and twirls him around.

“Put me down, put me down!” He exclaims through his laughter. 

“Tell Raven ‘bye’.” Lexa says, carrying Finn towards the staircase. “We are going to leave her alone, now.”

“Bye, Raven!” He yells, before the darker skinned woman is out of his line of vision.

Lexa finally relinquishes her hold on the boy when they reach the hallway upstairs. He runs into the living room and bounces on the couch, reaching for the remote midair. Lexa chuckles behind him and makes her way into the kitchen. “So, what do you want for supper tonight?”

“Can we just order pizza?”

Lexa smirks. “On Christmas Eve?”

“Yep.”

“Okay.” She responds. “If that’s good with you, then that’s good with me.” Lexa grabbed her phone out of her pocket to call the pizza delivery place and she smiled as she watched Finn sitting on the couch, scrolling through the deep-sea documentaries on Netflix. She’d taught him well.

“Great Whites, giant squids, or jellyfish?” He asks, clearly wanting Lexa to decide between the three different movies, and she smiled again to herself. This feeling was fantastic. This feeling of comfort and warmth.   
She feels like she’s finally found her place. That’s what this is. Her place. This feeling is home.

 

//

 

“This party is great.” Octavia says, blandly. Clearly, she is trying to cheer Clarke up. The blonde looks like someone popped her balloon or something and that’s how she’s been ever since they arrived at the gala a couple of hours earlier. 

It’s being held at the town hall. There’s only about seventy-five people in attendance since the town is so small and it is Christmas Eve. The grand hall is decorated beautifully and ornately over every inch. Garland and Poinsettias hang from every corner, table, and doorway. There are twinkle lights wrapped around the large rafters of the ceiling, making it seem as if the night sky is open above them. 

Octavia attempts to get Clarke’s attention once more, after a few moments of silence. The blonde really is in her own world. “Earth to Clarke.” The shorter woman calls. “Look, are you ready to leave or something?”

The blonde finally looks her best friend’s way and shakes her head. “No.” Clarke replies. “We can stay another hours or so.”

“Are you sure? Because you look like someone just stole your lollipop.”

“Shut up.” Clarke groans, causing Octavia to chuckle lightly. “I just really wish I were at home with Finn - and Lexa.” She says, not even bothering trying to hide these things from her friend anymore. “It’s Christmas Eve.”

“I know.” Octavia agrees. “But at least your art is getting a lot of buzz.” The dark-haired girl is correct about that. Clarke has had several citizens of Silverton hit her up for a custom piece, or even the ones that are on display tonight. Actually, Octavia is fairly certain that every single one of Clarke’s pieces that are present have been sold tonight. Clarke is definitely going to be carrying home a decent about of cash tonight.

“Yeah.” Clarke sighs and grins at her friend. “I’m glad that people find my work worthwhile, I suppose.”

“You suppose?”

Clarke hums and then… “Oh god.” She groans when her eyes catch something on the other side of Octavia. “Shit, shit, shit…”

“What is it?”

“Dr. Jaha.” Octavia turns around to see a dark-skinned man about their age approaching them. She turns back around to see Clarke grimacing. “He hits on me literally every day that I work. He just can’t seem to take ‘no’ for an answer.” She groans again.

“Want me to get rid of him?”

“No.” Clarke replies. “I can handle Wells.” Octavia nods, and walks a little piece away to a table that’s filled with champagne. She stays close just in case Clarke needs her to jump in. 

“Clarke,” Wells says with a large smile on his face as he approaches the blonde. If he even bothered to think, he would know that Clarke’s body language screams ‘Please, don’t talk to me’. Naturally he bypasses that. “You look especially lovely this evening.”

Clarke throws on her best warm smile and nods towards her boss. “Thank you, Dr. Jaha. It’s nice to see you.” Not really, but she’s never been one to act like a complete bitch towards anyone else.

“Please, Clarke. I ask you all of the time to call me ‘Wells’.”

“Of course. I’m sorry, Wells.” She replies, wishing that he would just leave her alone already. “Are you having a good evening?”

“I am.” He smiles. “Your art is really great. The painting of the field of peonies in the sunset is my favorite.”

Clarke has to use everything within her not to roll her eyes at his statement and much more than that not to punch him. “Ahh…” She sighs, looking over towards the painting that he’s speaking about. “That is a lovely painting, but not one of mine. I’m sure Mrs. Akrin would be pleased to hear that, though.”

A look of pure embarrassment washes over his features and Clarke has to hold back her amusement. “Oh my gosh.” Wells responds quickly. “Clarke, I am so sorry. It was so lovely, I just assumed that it was you -”

“It’s fine.” She replies with a small smirk and a wave of her hand. “All of my pieces here tonight are done with charcoal. Not paint.”

“Ahh…” His face says that he is about to change the subject entirely and Clarke is sure that she knows what he is going to say. “Well, so that I may apologize… may I have this dance?” He holds out his hand in front of her, and his body language says that he is fairly confident that she will accept. She honestly can’t wait to burst his bubble. She’s feeling extra petty tonight. The only person that she wishes could be here to   
dance with is Lexa.

“I’m sorry, Dr. Jaha.” The formal use of his name does not go unnoticed by him. Clarke looks down at his hand and then back to his face with a small smile. “I’m not interested.” She starts to walk away then, but a stern hand grabs at her shoulder, turning her back around.

“In me or in the dance?” Wells asks, his voice lower. Quieter. Like he wants no one to hear.

Clarke sighs, not wanting to sound like an asshole, but his hand on her shoulder is much too firm for her liking. “In both.” She replies, pulling back and out of his grip once again. Clarke starts walking off again, headed in the direction towards her best friend at the bar. 

“I’d be the best thing that’s ever happened to you.” The man exclaims, a little louder than necessary. 

Without thinking, Clarke spins around. Almost too fast, because she starts to feel a little dizzy. Wells’ face is red, like he’s mad and Clarke would probably be scared of him if she weren’t in a room full of people. “The best thing that’s ever happened to me is waiting for me at my house, Dr. Jaha.” She walks off once again. This time, there is no response from her boss. If she even has a job now, that is. The words that she had just spoke make her own heart warm. She had just said them, not really thinking if she was talking about little Finn or Lexa. The longer she thinks about it, she knows that she was definitely thinking about both.

“What was that all about?” Octavia asks, taking a sip of whatever alcohol she’s drinking as the blonde approaches her. 

Clarke shakes her head, not really wanting to talk about it. “He obviously thought that just because he’s my boss, I’d just roll over and sleep with him.” Octavia chuckles when Clarke takes the glass out of her hand to finish off the warm drink. “Let’s go home.” Clarke says, slamming the glass down onto the bar. Probably harder than she should have. She and Octavia turn around to head for the door, but an older man stops them in their tracks. Clarke recognizes him as Mayor Jones. 

The man extends his hand with a warm smile. “Ms. Griffin.” His voice is quiet soft and welcoming for a man. “I was told that I have you to thank for the lovely charcoal sketches.” Clarke smiles and welcomes his hand into her own to shake it. 

“Thank you so much, Mayor Jones.” She grins. “But, I’m not quite sure why you’re thanking me.”

“Well, for starters, your work is breathtaking and everyone that saw them here tonight should be coming over here to thank you.” Clarke is pretty sure that she blushes at all of the praise. She isn’t used to all of that. Except from a certain brunette back at her house. Lexa always makes Clarke feel better about everything. “I would also like to purchase them from you.” He shrugs nonchalantly. “I’d love to have a few in my office at the town hall, and even enjoy some at my home. My wife fell in love with them as well.”

“Wait.” She says softly. “You want to buy my drawings? All of them?”

“Of course.” The mayor smiles. “That is hoping that no one else has beat me to it.”

Clarke can’t believe that someone is actually wanting to buy her work. Much less, all of them. She turns her head slightly to look at Octavia who is smiling at her. Clarke turns back to the mayor and smiles. “I’d be honored for you to own my work, sir.”

“Great.” He grins widely. “I will get your contact information from Mr. Wallace. After the exhibition is over here, I will come collect them.” He shakes her hand once again, nodding over at Octavia with a smile before walking off back into the crowd.

“Holy shit, Clarky.” Octavia grins. “You just sold your work to the mayor.”

Clarke rolls her eyes as she smiles. “Octavia, Mayor Jones is the mayor of a town with a smaller population than your apartment building back in L.A.”

“Still a mayor.” Octavia shrugs.

“I guess it is pretty cool.” Clarke sighs, walking out the front door of the art gallery with her best friend. Octavia slings her arm around Clarke’s shoulders as they walk to the car. 

“Wait until Lexa hears about this Dr. Jaha guy putting the moves on her woman.” Octavia laughs.

Clarke side eyes her best friend. “You really are warming up to her, aren’t you?” Octavia doesn’t answer, only rolling her eyes and hopping into the car. The drive back to Clarke’s house is filled with laughter and singing.

 

//

 

Clarke walks into her home as silently as she can, not wanting to wake anyone that might be asleep. The living room and kitchen area are both dark as she and Octavia step in. The shorter woman announces that she’s going to take a shower, leaving Clarke alone to walk through the hallway. She sees a small, warm light coming from the crack underneath her son’s bedroom door. She was really hoping that Finn would still be awake so that she could tuck him in on Christmas Eve night, but the sight in front of her when she opens the door is way better than anything that she could have imagined.

Lexa is sitting against the tiny headboard of Finn’s bed. Her back to it, with a book practically falling out of her hand. The brunette’s mouth is hung open slightly, and Clarke wants to laugh but the sight is too beautiful. Her son’s head is on Lexa’s shoulder and he is also fast asleep. The pair must have been worn out from an afternoon of playing. 

The blonde smiles to herself, standing in the doorway of her five-year-old’s bedroom. She doesn’t know how long she stands there for, watching her son and her girlfriend sleep. After another couple of moments, she moves towards the bed and slowly takes the book out of Lexa’s hand. Of course, the movement was enough to wake Lexa, because Clarke sees the most beautiful set of green eyes open up slowly. Lexa smiles up at Clarke as the blonde sets the book on the nightstand. Neither of them say a word. Not wanting to wake up Finn. They just stare at each other and smile, until Lexa starts to slowly move Finn’s head off of her and down onto his soft pillow. She leans down and kisses the boy’s forehead and so does Clarke before they both exit the room.

“How did the gala go?” Lexa asks when they reach Clarke’s bedroom. “Did you have a good time?”

Clarke shrugs and throws her arms around Lexa’s shoudlers. The brunette’s hands come to rest on Clarke’s waist. “It was good.”

“That doesn’t sound too convincing.”

“I promise. Everything went fine…” Clarke sighs again, and the brunette’s hold on her waist tightens a bit. “Until my boss attempted to hit on me once again.” Lexa raises a brow in question and Clarke can see her girlfriend’s jaw clench tightly. Is this jealous Lexa? Clarke grins inwardly. “He tried dancing with me. I told him no and tried to walk off and then he grabbed my shoulder to pull me back.”

“What?” Lexa asks, her anger getting the better of her if her voice was anything to go by. “He touched you?”

“It’s okay, Lex.” Clarke smiles. “I told him that I wasn’t the least bit interested in him or the dance and then he preceded to tell me that he would be the best thing that’s ever happened to me.” Lexa rolls her eyes, causing Clarke to chuckle and then reach up to place a soft kiss on the taller woman’s lips. “I told him that the best thing that’s ever happened to me was waiting for me at home.”

Lexa smiles warmly. “Finn is a pretty great kid.” Clarke laughs out loud at Lexa’s obliviousness and the blonde kisses her again.

“I wasn’t just talking about Finn.”

Lexa raises an eyebrow again with a hint of a smile. “Oh yeah?” Clarke nods. There’s a few seconds of silence and staring until Lexa breaks it again. “Did you dance at all?”

“No.” 

“Would you dance with me?”

“Right now?” Clarke asks with a chuckle.

“Yes.” Lexa replies as she starts to move the two of them in the middle of Clarke’s bedroom floor, swaying slowly back and forth.

“We don’t have any music.” Clarke states, looking into the green abyss. 

“We don’t need any.” Lexa replies, before taking Clarke’s lips with her own

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, what did you guys think? How was it? Let me know in the comments below. I want to thank y'all again for being so patient with me. I have received lots of PMs on here and on Twitter and Instagram. They have all been lovely. Thank you. Once again, be patient with me.
> 
> Follow me on Twitter and on Instagram @asuzh90  
> (Just know that I never post anything interesting) ;)

**Author's Note:**

> What did you think? Please let me know! Hopefully you liked it so that I can continue. I really liked writing the first chapter. Love you all!
> 
> Follow me on Twitter @asuzh90


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